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Heated Rivalry 1x4 | Watch Along (Patreon)

Published:
2026-04-30 14:00:12
Imported:
2026-04
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Heated Rivalry 1x4 | Watch Along

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Elissa Goetschius

I think there's a lot of fear of falling for someone in this kind of situation because if you get outed, there's a good chance you lose your job. (Context: there have been no out NHL players and in other sports, players that are out often find themselves without a team to play on.) And for Ilya, whose visa is inevitably tied to playing hockey, that means going back to Russia as an out celebrity athlete which would absolutely be seen as "promoting a gay lifestyle" which could lead to imprisonment and worse. Also, I think the one note I would give this series is that Ilya's reputation for being seen with lots of women isn't really present to the viewer. I think that's what he's trying to address with Shane in that awkward conversation, that he knows he's seen with lots of women and that information probably gets to Shane, but he wants to clarify that they aren't meaningful relationships. And then he wants to know more about Shane. Is he seeing anyone else? Does he like women as well? But once again, their modes of communication pass each other by. Ilya is all subtext and Shane has no subtext.

Jérémy

I think there's a slight misunderstanding about Ilya's intents here. The whole tuna melt scene is him trying to open up to Shane. Well, in his own obtuse Ilya kind of way. It's the first time they hook up in the daytime, the first time Ilya asks Shane to stay over. He cooks him food, gives him the drink he likes (which he clearly got specially for Shane). He tries to touch on the subject of women because he wants to understand what Shane's deal is and if he sleeps with other men and women like he does. Of course his approach is terrible but what else is new. These men are awful at communicating. Ilya wants more from this relationship but he can't have more. It's not a possibility in his mind so he can't allow himself to give too much away. I also feel like viewers often take Shane's agency away from him. Shane can walk away anytime he wants. In fact he does walk away in this very episode when things get too intimate. They use each other's first names for the first time in that couch frotting session. This relationship is getting more real and when you combine that with the immense pressure Shane feels from his family and the hockey world to conform he can't handle it. So he runs. I think it's fair for Ilya to be upset because in his mind this is the first time in years that he lets himself be vulnerable a bit and it results in Shane fleeing. In the way that Scott and Kip are so very honest about their feelings, Shane and Ilya always talk in double-speak. Ilya saying "I'm probably gonna find someone else...but you know me I'm lazy so..." It's him saying: I should find someone else but I really just want you so please tell me that you feel the same.

TJ115

Aw, just two sweet yearning boys who suck at communicating. Can't wait for episode 5.

Kyle

I would love if after you finish this series you do a little more digging into the scenes in this episode. That last chunk of the episode when the song switches to the male singer is all supposed to be in Shanes head. Rose's friend being the other guy and how Shane literally feels trapped in between those two choices.

Tami

😢 I think you really misunderstood where Ilya is coming from in this episode. He does NOT see Shane as just a hookup. In fact, it's quite the opposite. Ilya and Shane at that point had never been exclusive. That montage at the beginning shows that, as time went on, Ilya was tiring of these other hookups and kept checking his phone hoping to get a message from Shane. When Ilya invited Shane to his house, Ilya let his walls down and was trying in his own guarded way to let Shane know how much he cared for him. He asked him to stay, he had bought everything ahead of time to make Shane a meal that fit in his special diet, he stocked his fridge with Shane's favorite ginger ale. When Ilya is talking about women, he is letting Shane know he's bisexual and trying to suss out if Shane is, too, or if he's sleeping with anyone else. And after discussing the women, when he says, "But you know me, I'm lazy," that's his way of saying, yes, I have been sleeping with other people, but they're not who I want... it's you. Then he is the first to call Shane by his first name during that intimate scene. Shane responds in kind, but then freaks out. When Ilya then reverts back to saying, "Hollander," it breaks my heart. It's like he is saying, no please don't leave me, I'll take it back, just pretend I never said it, I don't want to lose you. Ilya is absolutely devastated. I think perhaps Shane kind of always assumed this was a temporary thing and that eventually he'd get into a hetero relationship and get married and have kids just like everyone expects him to. Ilya doing all of these things for him and saying his first name made him realize that Ilya actually DOES care about him. A LOT. So that scared him, especially when he found himself replying in kind, because it's the first time he's really facing the fact that he might in fact be completely gay, and he'd never imagined that being his future. A lot of their miscommunication is a result of a few things: (1) A language and cultural barrier for Ilya, (2) Ilya being so guarded and afraid because of his trauma, thus always kind of dancing around difficult topics in an indirect way, and (3) Shane's autism making it harder for him to interpret subtext and Ilya coming from Ilya because he requires more direct communication. Because of their complicated situation, they haven't gotten to spend enough time together to really learn how to get past those barriers and learn the best way to communicate their true thoughts and feelings to each other.

Tami

This is what the author, Rachel Reid, said about the tuna melt scene in a post: "I get asked a lot about Ilya’s thoughts and feelings during (and leading up to) the “Tuna melt scene.” Here are some answers… Ok, so at this point in our story, Ilya is super in love with Shane but won’t admit it to himself. He’s still trying to play it cool, but he has also made this whole plan about getting Shane to spend the night. He knows neither of them have to be up early the next morning; conditions are perfect. He goes grocery shopping, he imagines what he will say when the time comes, he decides he will turn on a hockey game because that might get Shane to relax. All of this is preplanned. Ilya has been thinking about it for days. He doesn’t invite Shane to stay until after they’ve had sex. He waits for Shane to be relaxed and happy, then he asks. He makes sure he sounds perfectly calm when he asks—almost indifferent—but he REALLY wants Shane to stay. When Shane says yes, Ilya is celebrating inside. The “Shane” just slips out, and Ilya is mortified. In his mind he feels he’d just admitted all his feelings with a single word. When Shane says “Ilya” back, he’s flooded with relief and happiness. It’s a mirror of the _______ [removed what she said here because it's a spoiler for a later episode] scene later. When Shane panics and leaves later, Ilya is DEVASTATED, but refuses to show it. After Shane leaves he’s miserable and embarrassed. And then Rose Landry happens."

Tami

Thank you! Well said. It always makes me so sad when reactors miss all of the visual and verbal cues from Ilya that show how hard he's fallen for Shane. And I love your second paragraph about Shane's agency. Too many reactors are so overprotective of Shane and talk about him like he's a child. They get mad that Ilya ghosted Shane in ep2, but totally ignore all of the times they show Shane not responding to Ilya's texts.

BoneSaw99

Definitely think there’s been some misreading of the dynamics in their relationship for sure, and I think it’s partly because you’re not getting the internal monologues you get in the book. Ilya from the very beginning has been the one that completely fell for Shane. He’s been obsessed with him since they met. He’s from the start been the one trying to get closer and only really pulls away when home, Russia, or his family comes up. There’s a clear cultural and language barrier between the 2 that is further complicated by Shane’s autistic tendencies that lead him to miss a lot of Ilya’s overtures towards him. Ilya definitely tries to verbally downplay what they are and what they’re doing but that’s more as a guarded coping mechanism and fear of the labels because of where he comes from and what the consequences are. That said, his actual actions clearly show a desire to be exclusive with Shane. He’s mostly stopped sleeping around, he’s constantly watching anything to do with Shane, made sure he stocked his house with all the things Shane enjoys, and is the one who instigated the intimacy in this episode by asking him to stay and using his first name. Plus, there’s the added factor of they’re both men who aren’t exactly the most apt communicators but it’s also an issue of it being that they’re *closeted* gay men and the gay community’s dynamic with sex is very different than the straight community. Sex is often times the catalyst for intimacy in the gay community and that’s what this show and its book really highlight.

Adavan

I know this is an old comment, but I just had to tell you how much I agree with you. They both ghost each other at different times, yes Ilya went longer than he should have. But people definitely baby Shane way too much. That is a capable, intelligent man! So many people talk about the "power imbalance" in their relationship. There is NO power imbalance. Shane and Ilya are exact equals - same age, same level professionally, same amount of wealth, and the same casual view of the relationship they desperately want to be more. They both have the power to walk away at any time, and they both try to, at different moments - Ilya in the ghosting part of episode 2 and Shane after the tuna melt here in episode 4. And NEITHER of them are able to actually stay away from the other. Neither of the boys are the villains in this story. Society, hockey culture, toxic masculinity and homophobia are the villains. Our boys are just two guys struggling to navigate a situation that feels utterly untenable to them both. I really wish reactors ever got that. I can count on one hand the number of reactors I've seen actually understand it.

Brittany Mays

Definitely seems to be some projection here. I don't think their relationship is as similar to your past relationships as you believe. They have so many different reasons for what they are doing that isn't going to be in your lived experience.

janeelmonae

I could not agree more. I love them both equally but I feel like I have to defend Ilya bc he is often villainized, while Shane is infantilized. People say why doesn’t Ilya give Shane more he’s playing with him but Ilya (or anyone for that matter) is under any obligation to give anything that hasn’t been asked for. Shane is a grown ass man if he wants things to be different he needs to say so. Ilya always says “ I’ll make you a deal” which is a great opening for inserting new terms. I love Shane, he’s so sweet and I hate to see him sad but he’s not a victim.

janeelmonae

I wish people understood Ilya more 🥺