Hot Dog Appreciation Day: The Sex Oven (Patreon)

Welcome, 🌭s, to your day of appreciation. We’re awesome. We know that. We know it so hard that we each have a tattoo of the other that our spouses do NOT approve of.

But this isn’t about us. This is about you. Did you know you’re awesome? Because you are. We have proof!

First let’s check in on Sissyneck Corner, where an RV is a valid choice for a sole vehicle, primary residence, and final resting place.

Sissyneck has been to Gibsonton, the magical town of Florida carnies, and he has big news about their snack selection.

But how? How did Sissyneck get access to the hidden carny village in the first place? Now that we look back on it, there were clues…

Now let’s move on to the Comments, where Matt Edwards has a sad, touching tale for Dennard to ruin.

DrShazBot understands the Hot Dog financial model: To do business so badly it’s plain we’d die without your charity.

While AEKH understands the Hot Dog spiritual model: Find joy in the simplicity of awfulness.

Flippant Sausage has big news about that promotion Merritt’s been waiting on!

Jeff Orasky awoke to find his innocence gone, and in its place a single dignified calling card reading: Jason Pargin, Gentleman Thief.

Chris “Ace” Hendrix makes a lot of clown-centric life choices.

Troy Wood knows how the insane animatronic band choreographer Aaron Fechter is going to die.

Which may or may not be handy information for our next commenter…

Bill Culbertson has some disturbing questions, luckily The Parallel Viewmaster has some disturbing answers.

Now on to the Discord, where Agent has some simpler questions, and Henry has some simpler answers.

Turns out we had a business mentor in our Discord this whole time. It’s Ferroday!

Zemyla gets Goblin all set up for a spike… then nails a trampoline and bounces straight over Goblin’s head to steal it.

Noiretoon assembled the most dangerous bonking and conking specialists on Earth. RoostAIr named the team. Equally valuable contributions.

Dan B and Delta have a complicated relationship. It’s sort of a Ross and Rachel thing. Ross hated Rachel, right?

We won’t sugarcoat this. Rob built a sex oven.

And now we’re in love with a sex oven.

Congratulations, Rob!

You were almost the winner of Appreciation Day! But Doctor Squatchbody stole it with this fanart of the Fireball-nip stealing, gasoline-huffing squirrels that live in Brockway’s garden shed.

Doctor Squatchbody, we are trusting you with one of the finest pieces of art ever produced by human culture. This undoctored photo of Billy Corgan having a blast on his little train.

Huh. We swear something is different about this picture. Damned if we can spot it, though.

You folks are, as always, the best. And if anyone ever questions that, you call us. We’ll put them in the sex oven.