weekly talk 340 (Patreon)

Here we are, and right on time this once!

Workflow:

Working on the weekly 64 right now, i would like to say "i'm gonna do something simple this time" but i'm experimented enough to know this magic never works, and just call upon you a curse that force you to work more in the end!So ll just work on it a bit more and should be done Wednesday tops, advanced already quite well but wanna redraw some of the parts and i dunno how long it ll take.Then jumping on rewards for the rest of the week! I had to cancel my one week holliday for July, but ll take 10 days in mid august, so should compensate me enough X)

Silence on the bird

I.. took a big decision recently, about social networks. Now i'll use it only to post art, answering comments.. and that's it.Used to communicate quite often there, but half the time it end with peoples, or twisting your words, or starting an argument about.. nothingThe last drop was recently, was just talking of Arcane, and peoples started to swat me about.. a thing i didn't said. Tough might be the way i wrote it, but no, most others get what i was saying, just.. peoples never read, they look at the first 2 words, don't take the time to read and instantly ATTACK.And.. i actually genuinely hate that way to interact. You don't feel like communicating, more like if you were in constant crisis management.So i'll stay on discord, can be the same but on my own discords i'm the admin so, worst case, can ban peoples that piss me off X)Truth is also, Twitter constantly shitting on us, twisting the algorythm back and forth, last weeks we were more seen, recently no drawing made more than 10k VIEWS in days (out of 86k followers.. 1/9 of my followers onky see my stuff). So.. don't really want to put effort on a thing that just blatlantly shit on my face.And Bluesky.. is twitter. Less racism, more Gay peoples, but it ll end the same, because the formula is the same. Short messages only don't push peoples to communicate, but to drop quick socials bombs. IMO the issue is less who talk, in those platform, and the mere way those site force us to talk.So, now won't speak there anymore. It's a bit hard, i used to love to just drop an idea or a vote, to laugh there. Just to see peoples opinions or joke.Wich bring us..

Such a lonely day

I.. am not at my best morally in recent months.Most is part of some familly issues. It's personal but to resume, my uncle suicide broke my father side family. And i'm the oldest of my sibling, and by default, a bit the one that got to "deal with it". Why not your father? you might ask.. maybe because he is part of the issue.At that you add a roomate that decided paying her part of the charges and everything is not mandatory, and several small rock thrown at my own sanity, like the fact above, that my social networks don't works anymore.. and ..I start to gather bad mood, dark ideas and loneliness at an alarming rate.It's ok, i started to hang out more with friends too, like to compensate, trying to do activities on the side.. but truth is i just feel isolated, alone and broke.I just feel so tired. it's hard to concentrate on drawings for more than a couple of hours, why i started to slow down on the art release.. But i feel like how i did in last month were complete garbage, and it don't help..Is there a bright side?Yes, i know it's a moment. Wich means, it's not depression. I know it's a down phase, that i'm on a dark moment, but that it ll get better one day. Also some days are great i'm feeling well and normal. It's just some others are.. bad. Last month, i took 2 comms, emergency ones, and the 2 peoples who took it gave me a tips. It's never mandatory and they both did. Was just.. nice. And it made me cry for 2 h in a row.That's the thing, in France we got this say, "avoir les nerfs a fleur de peau" wich literally means "have your nerves right under your skins" to basicly say that, you feel too much, you're over sensitive. It's how i am right now. It's good too, being able to cry, to talk, it help, a lot. And as i said i got really good time and days too.Just wanted to say i'm sorry quality went bad recently and that i became slower. I'll try to work on my mental state to get better in the next weeks.Promess, i'll take care of myself

That's about it

thanks for reading this far

and c ya soon