Happy New Year, hello 2025 (Patreon)

Hello moles

How are you? How has your winter been so far?

I was wanting to check in here and write a long blog post towards the end of November/early December when all my butt MADNESS kicked off, but to be quite honest I barely had the time for anything else. I was running on fumes. GAH! SO much to discuss. 

First of all, it has been such a whirlwind, I truly slept over Christmas. I shut down from work finally on the 23rd, slept all night, took a 5 hour nap on Christmas Eve!! Unheard of, I never nap! And then slept again all night! It was so nice to feel that bodily switch off feeling where you feel yourself letting go and getting multiple deep sleeps, it happens to me so rarely. I actually always enjoy that Christmas period switch off where no one is working all the way through to the 2nd, I love getting cosy and a bit emotional and watching all the movies and eating all the things. This is the part I find slightly more tough. Waiting for things to return to normal, feeling guilty for wishing it along sooner than I should and anxious that I’m both not back to work yet and also not able to relax anymore. I’m really trying to be kind to myself and not compare myself to others with their routines and what they might be up to, saying that I woke up at 4.30 am from nightmares about people judging me. Will I always be so Catholic?! 

Anyway, BACK TO MY BUTT. You guys…wooowwww. I did not actually expect the media frenzy that this sparked. Looking back on it I think maybe I was being slightly naive about that. I guess it is quite shocking to the general public because it is seen as this scandalous thing and sex work is not the “norm”. It’s hidden from people’s lives a lot because it can cause you harm to be honest about it and family and friends aren’t always supportive. It’s also just, do you feel having a queer community just puts you ahead of things? Is it more practice in being “open”. Like we’re just automatically more educated on diversity and sex because we have to be and our friends are doing lots of different things, lots of different types of lifestyles and different obstacles so you’re just more aware I think. I don’t know if that’s true but it’s how I feel. Anyway Me and Tom were laughing because when I discussed it with him early on before launching the page I had talked about trying to hide it from certain people, like neighbours and certain family members. Can you imagine if I’d bloody bothered to try?! It was in every single media outlet in the country. LOL. 

I feel so lucky that my family have been so supportive. Someone came up to my mum at my Koko show and asked her what she thought of it all, she said “Well I grew that bum inside me and I’ve always loved that bum so I’m very proud of her”! And even my Nan who is 93 gets the point, she said I’m fighting for the underdog as I always do. I also had support from my Mum’s catholic cousin in rural Ireland. She told me well done for standing up for what I believe in. I feel so bloody lucky. It would have been so much harder had I not had such enthusiasm behind me. I was also on tour, on the bus with my whole band and crew and Connie Constance & co and it just kind of steamed us along on tour. It became part of the mission. I have of course seen and dodged as much as I can of the hate and debate about how I’m a bad example and that I’m to blame for human trafficking and that I’m a failed pop star so I’m selling my bum cause I “blew my fortune”. But to be honest, doing something so audacious like that, made me cope with all that hate a lot better than I normally cope with internet hate. I replied where I thought necessary and then I just let them go at it, I mean argue, go for it! It creates more attention on the issue which is good for the political side of things plus it creates more onlyfans so it works for me financially too. The only one that really got my goat was people saying I’m a bad example to young women, obviously I got pretty pissed about that. I’ve been fighting for young girls and talking about feminism in pop before anyone else in my generation globally. But I know what I’m fighting for and to be honest I’m just mad cause these people are so ignorant and that desire to protect young girls as though they are princesses and should be wrapped in cotton wool and can’t think for themselves is part of the problem with the patriarchy anyway. 

Ok let’s discuss finances, I feel completely relieved to have found a sort of side gig that is something I actually enjoy and that people are happy to pay for. In the music business you’re so used to begging for the basics, I do so much work for free and am also paying to do my job so often that it’s really relieving to have this job that people want to give me money for doing! It’s a really non complicated exchange and people are really happy to pay for, in fact they love paying me for it! It’s such a different relationship. There’s also the fact that on the music side of things I feel really conscious of not ripping off my fans, my moles. I want my tickets to be affordable for everyone, I want my merch to be affordable, I think about things like that. I never want my fans to be made to feel unwelcome or like it’s a financial strain to enjoy my music. But with onlyfans and an exchange in nature that is sexual and that people are used to paying for and happy to pay for is just really simple and it has given me SO MUCH RELIEF. It’s not soul work it’s just fun, flashy, cheeky, sexually educating and I love it. It actually helped stop me from going into debt from all these tours. I was able to pay all of my invoices before Christmas which made me sooooo happy and then also have space to not stress over Christmas. 

Of course I have so many ideas. My plan is to make this my full time job when I’m not in the studio or touring. I feel like if I can make this work full time then I have found the solution to the problem I was looking for. My next record is something I’ve been working on for 8 years and I was so worried I wouldn’t be able to finance it properly. It’s going to be expensive to do it the way I dream of, for years I’ve been saying “I won’t compromise on this record” but I was thinking shit, how the fuck am I going to fund this. There’s a lot of musicians involved and also a lot of production going into it. I want these to be the biggest and bet live shows I’ve ever worked on, it’ll all take some time. But all of a sudden I have this emotional relief of being able to add to whatever funds a small indie label can give me, have my team and potentially extend that team and do what I’ve been dreaming of! I’ll keep you posted on this of course. 

Tell me how you’re feeling about 2025…and how were your Christmases? What are you looking forward to?

By the way, my show at Kentish Town Forum is going to be very special and so is my show at Mighty Hoopla. They have been so fun and supportive and inspired about the show and we’re planning something really fucking cool!!! They will be my last proper 9 Sad Symphonies shows. I have 2 other smaller festivals booked after that to cover some summer costs. But that will be a closing of a chapter in a way. And then on to new exciting things!

I want to thank the Substance movie for giving me the audacity to not give a fuck and also you’ll be happy to know I got so much of my confidence back through touring and also through this campaign. I was able to stop comparing my music career to others and I think by advocating for non stadium artists, myself, and really putting value on music across all levels, it kind of sunk into my brain that my music matters and my show matters and it just released me of I dunno, not being a bigger artist? Just really valuing what I do. It’s important for culture to exist across the board and I appreciate myself more now. Does that make sense? It’s like the thing of looking into the mirror and telling yourself things but I did it in every paper in the UK. HA. No but Jory what is the thing I’m talking about? I’m sure there’s an analysis to be made there. 

Ok guys I love you! Catch me up on your everythingS!!

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