pls give me your opinion (Patreon)

sorry this is kinda negative but i think i need it right now. i feel so bad cuz i dont know what people expecting from me?

more milfs? more persona? more naoto? do you like that semi-realistic crap that i tryna do? why you exactly support me and what you wanna see more? what you dont like in my drawnings and what details i missing when i tryina to make painting?  please let me know

also to not feel too bad my crappy drawnings is pretty much a kunaboto/ndc mostly (and much more of other hentai artist) copypasta (for those ppl who dont know). so please check their art if you not already

I'm not disciplined person and i always shocked how ppl making such completed and hard drawnings, where they take time for that and where they take all that experience and knowledge for shading/drawning/coloring/poses and  in same time, they also so young and confident. im trying to force myself to make more detalization, to spend more time on 1 drawning, i spend all my free time on that(i love it, games, movies, cartoons and talking with ppl irl doesnt satisfied me anymore) but hours goes and goes, i just maded sketch and put flat color in it and this is alredy day spended, sometimes i think i just felt asleep for few hours without noticing it. i havent good ideas at all, some ideas comes to my mind but i have shitty memory and i forgetting that very fast. how to be original? how to be good? all things that i tried to do in life is so scuffed. im thinking about deleting all my accounts more and more since i hit 300 followers on twitter.