Behind-the-Song: I'll Never pt.1 (Patreon)

This song feels generally pretty self explanatory, but, especially when it comes to the second verse and the bridge, you might be getting a bit of tea 🍵👀 So...I hope you're ready for that 💁‍♀️

I'm starting with the chorus for this song because, while it doesn't start with a chorus, that's how I started writing it. Also this just feels like the right place to start so I can best give you the full story should I be so inclined...

I genuinely started writing this song very much out of the blue with no intention of ever finishing it. As per protocol, I did start writing it while washing my hands in my bathroom. Toilet tunes forever ✊️ Anyway...

Why do I want you? I shouldn't want you; I can't want you / Can't stop thinking '
out you; I'm thinking '
out you, and I don't want to

This is the part I wrote in the bathroom 👀 I honestly was not writing this about anything in particular. I had heard a Maisie Peter's song and decided I liked the idea of using the same couple words, but shifting the words around them to change the meaning. So I was music in my little noggin and this is what I came up with 😅 "want you, want you, want you, ['bout you, 'bout you,] want to" but make it ✨️ pretty ✨️

As for the meaning behind it, I think it's pretty obvious, though I truly did not write it about anything (or anyone) in particular at the time. And then because I didn't actually have a reason to write it, I almost didn't 🫣 But a friend liked it and convinced me it needed to be finished 🤷‍♀️

'Cause I'll never have you, oh no / I won't. I'll never, no...

I really did not know where to go with this song after playing around with just repeating the same words, but after just playing the first bit repeatedly and adding guitar, this is what the brainstorm produced and how the title of the song was born!

I did eventually start using this song to cpntemplate a specific relationship (friendship) I had at the time in order to finish writing it, and even this chorus ended up becoming relatable despite not having initially based it on anything 😅🫣 More on that later, maybe..?

Stay tuned