K-Tea: Special Non-exclusive Real Talk Edition (Patreon)

Hiiiiii 👋

I've just had a little cry and I decided "wouldn't it be fun to call myself out on the internet?" 😅🫣

First and foremost, as you have probably already noticed, there will be some gaps in content posted here while I am preparing to move across the country. I am trying to keep up with what I can when I can, but ultimately, I just don't have a lot of time or energy right now 🫠

As a thank you to everyone who sticks around during this time, I am committing right now to pre-releasing the finished "I'm Here" for everyone to listen here on Patreon, at the same time I submit it to Spotify and other streaming platforms (that's 4-6 weeks before it'll be out!). I may share more of that and "The Only Thing You Love" as they come together, but that'll be determined later.

Anyway...

I've had a cry because I have a really bad migraine today. Again. And with everything going on, and everything I need to get done, that really messes with my plans 😅🙈 But more than that, it just feels like no matter what I do to prepare for everything, my health is determined to screw everything up 🥺

And I'm frustrated because, I know it's not a big deal if I don't end up baking cookies today (I'm currently resting in hopes the migraine will let up enough for me to get out of bed for more than 5 minutes), but I feel so bad about postponing 😭 I know it doesn't matter. I know people won't mind. I know that in the end, everyone who's waiting on cookies will still get cookies. And I know everyone will understand if it takes me a little longer.

But I just feel like...everyone has given me so much. And I just want to be able to give back and to show my appreciation. And it just feels like I can't even do that. Like... I've received so much support in so many ways, and it's all so meaningful to me, and it's literally how I get through each day. How I continue to live my life. And I can't even bake some stupid cookies 😭

And I don't want anyone to see this and think "oh my gosh, don't even worry about the cookies, Katie! Take care of you!" Because while I appreciate the grace, that's just not the point. I want to bake the cookies! I am just struggling to be patient with myself. And to remind myself that just because I have support, doesn't mean I'm not still disabled and unwell 😅🫠 And I still need to continue to rest and do what my stinking broken body needs me to do 🙄🙄🙄

Unrelated, semi-related, I have also been so much more exhausted than usual recently, so...despite trying to take things slow with getting ready for the move, it is apparently more draining of my limited energy than expected 🤦‍♀️

I'm doing my best. And my best is enough. And no one is going to be upset with me, or disappointed, or regret supporting me just because it took me a couple extra days to make cookies. 😪

Okay, thanks, bye 😅