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863 - A.I.: Attentional Intelligence feat. Hesse Deni (8/29/24) (Patreon)

Published:
2024-08-30 06:34:46
Imported:
2026-06

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Content

Wonderful Hesse joins us this week, and we start with yet another bizarre RFK Jr. animal story (we’ve now had Whale, Bear, Dog and Worm for those keeping track). Then: Trump’s Arlington bungle, how to talk to your kids about the Trump shooting, the death of various saints, the Brat-ification of the Democratic party, and Jerry Seinfeld assassinated by Hindu nationalists. 

Find more Hesse at: https://www.patreon.com/seekingderangements

Our hats at: chapotraphouse.store

Files

Comments

Shannon

WE LOVE HESSE

Travis

Felix begins speaking at 2 minutes and 30 seconds exactly

That’s Crazy

Thank you Chris for filling the Trough

Tyler

he got brain worms from a whale

Matthew chester

I’m bouncing up and down hooting like an ape.

The Children of Jack Acid

So basically RFK Jr. would be a good opponent for the animal trainer guy if there was ever a sequel to RRR.

Greg

Period…

Ryan Johnston

WHY ARE THE WINDOWS OPEN?!?!? They wouldn’t need the plastic bags if they just rolled the windows up. Am I missing something?

Joey Fazzoli

The lady doing rock and roll hands in the pic with trump is the coolest person ever

Raoul Duke

This ep reminds me that I wanna see the secret Chapo INTERLOCHEN doc where they look for the Epstein cabin

Schwartz666

Hey now, I didn't get an ep notification... Deepstate slop throttling, perhaps!?!

Schwartz666

Technically, chum, the slop of the sea.

T.A. Martin

MAGA the Gathering. If you get the Beautiful Boaters card, you're OP.

Shiv

PER-ioooood

demonsweat

RFK Jr is the lich-mayor of Busytown

HuffingGasInTheShed

Gore Vidal is at Rock Creek Cemetery with Henry and Clover Adams

K

Blank

Don’t we folks

Jaime Christley

Movie Mindset Samuel Fuller episode please

Articulus

Really missed Matt chiming in when Will asked how many presidents have been assassinated...I could hear him yelling out "Four out of Forty-Five!" -- that's 9%

Gubriel

Are straight men allowed to say Period yet, it seems like a lot of fun. We always get new words after everyone else

Daniel Marchant

Tommy De Payola is my favorite children's author, even if he did have to bribe the American Library Association to inflate Strega Nona's popularity.

Brian

Garbage pail kids reference 👍🏻

David J Sircin

Every rfk jr story I hear gives me the same feeling I had watching bone tomahawk

MEAT CLOWN

Hesse on movie mindset: 🥱🥱🥱 Hesse on regular episodes: 🔥🔥🔥

Oliver Elliott

Hermann Goring walked so Marlon Brando could run.

chapotraphouse

I was doing a quick count of how many presidents have been shot AT and I think we’re at 10 / 46, so you’ve got like a 22% chance of someone taking a shot at you as president. 11 if you count two tries at Ford. FDR really skews this by getting an attempt BEFORE taking office then serving 4 terms.

The Flon

Hesse is on 🔥🔥🔥

Articulus

I'll be dead and buried before I agree to count Grover Cleveland as 2 presidents

pizzapope

“indiku”… Enkidu deserves better

kt

Hesse!!!!!

Alex Thorne

I told my kids about trump getting shot and they said “woah” and kept playing roblox

Jawn Feddermang

It’s too bad RFKjr dropped out. SAVE THE WHALES HEAD would be a great campaign slogan

Patrick ODonnell

I think it was Olivia Nuzzi who profiled RFK Jr and said his car is disgustingly dirty and smells like dead animals

Kyle Erickson

Two episodes in a row that Felix has mentioned “Meet Joe Black”. Pitt heads eating goooooooood

RanRan Bobandy

As a cradle Catholic, just stopping in to say I enjoyed "Saints Chat" and Pilate is definitely not Ray Donovan, that was probably like Emperor Nero or something. Pilate tried to give Jesus an out like 3 times during his trial.

katie

My name is also Kathleen and I gotta say, “kick” was never on my shortlist for nicknames

Demented Avenger

Göring didn't walk. He waddled, and he did this because he ran instead of getting medical attention for a gun shot wound during the Hofbräukeller putsch. Great big fat narcissist.

Mac

Adam Friedland is getting replaced

Natalie

oooh a beefy one thanks yall happy Labor Day weekend

Zach Sampson

Thank god someone is finally pointing out RFKs pissing his pants voice idk how anyone takes him seriously

aahAAHaah

DOUG REFERENCE!!! Also, Saint Lawrence was the Saint that Hesse was trying to recal.

Savannakhet

Yeah but he was as fat as two presidents. Ay-oh!

Coyotes

Hesse! Yesse!

Chris

"He swallowed the wife to catch the worm" God bless Hesse now and forever

Doug Cartel

I love the mental image of RFK jr sprinting down a boardwalk with a chainsaw screaming at his daughter to keep up with him

chairman bs

As a childful dogman: I make a Chapo clip show for my kids weekly to explain the world

Ksizzle

“How to talk to your kids about political violence” THEY LIVE IN A PLACE WHERE THEM BEING SHOT AT SCHOOL IS A CONSTANT BACK OF MIND FEELING Fr what the fuck are you talking about, these people have no actual empathy for their children. I hate them

Ksizzle

Fake news

Tim O'

Roger Klotz from Doug as a Warren voter is an absolutely chilling idea.

Matelda

The Benedict Option is not named after Benedict XVI. It's named after the original St. Benedict, a 6th-century monk who wrote "The Rule," a famous guide to monastic life. I don't think Rod Dreher read it though.

etienne

this "generational transition" thing is so funny when you think that obama is 2 years older than kamala. oh we tried to have a gen-xer president that one time and so viscerally hated it that we felt the need to have members of the Silent Generation at the helm for a decade

pdschmidty

Shoutout St. Drogo- the patron saint of coffee ☕️

Robert

I'm sorry, if your name is Beth you can't marry a guy named Seth.

bean

I love Felix having his Matt Christman "SHUT UP!!!" moment in this ep, everything really is repeating itself

Vivi

Hesse always brings a lot of fun and wit to this podcast! Love it when y'all have her on :)

Erin

There's a sister of JFK/RFK way back when nicknamed Kick, I believe she died in the 50s

Schwartz666

And also that "not only only does sex not exist, it's wrong and shameful." Respressed weirdos aren't born, they're made.

Matt

Anybody else having RSS issues with this one?

Schwartz666

Wait, so it's not a breakfast guide?

tysonw81

Whether childless or not, they make a good point. There are perils that children may actually encounter in day-to-day life and so need to be prepared for to some degree without just scaring the shit out of them. It's deeply questionable, and even unhelpfully frightening, to confront them with world events they are not yet equipped to make sense of and assess reasonably how they apply to their own lives.

Caesaro

It was very funny when Hesse would say period after other jokes, I wish she said it a few more times

Matelda

There's a lot about breakfast, but nothing about anuses or sissy hypno

T

Where can I read something about this bribe? I tried googling and didn't find anything.

tysonw81

It's merely an observable fact of life that while human beings are self-evidently biologically sexually dimorphic (male or female) there are outliers where, for physiological or psychological reasons, individuals cannot conform to the simple self-identification that others go through. If you have compassion, you treat them in the manner that is most humane given their circumstances. If transgendered people, whatever you think the origin of their "confusion" is, can lead happier lives if they are treated as what they identify as, an obligation to do so naturally follows.

Rowan Swanson

I’m so glad you all had so much fun with the Desert Storm cards! Best thing I ever mailed in. Let me know if you want another box!

Taylor Markey

Hesse’s Pope Benedict suicide by cop joke deserved more laughs

tysonw81

Now that I re-read it, I don't know who you're addressing. As for those people who wish to indoctrinate their children (whether that works or not I don't know: how many self-identified liberal parents raise conservative children and vice-versa?) it's natural that, to them, their children should be made as angry and afraid as they are. They may love their kids, but in regards their own political or cultural mania, they don't have sufficiently developed intellectual or emotional responses to them themselves, let alone an ability to inform their children about them rationally.

Wesley Campbell Caretto

Will talking about how he wishes he had actual physical Trump cards, but if he WATCHED THE FULL VIDEO, he would have seen that if you bought a mere 15 digital cards (at $99 each) you get ONE physical card!

etienne

"fearless about picking a vice presidential nominee based on chemistry rather than calculus" are you kidding me lol they went and picked a White Person Whisperer from the Hinterlands to counterbalance their Urban Hip Hop Style presidential candidate and they had to go with that specific 2nd placed one because the lead one was actively a military traitor to the nation. Least perceptive writer world record

Wesley Campbell Caretto

Gotta say, as many times as I've heard it, I am glad that Felix keeps his joke about his dad calling a bunch of people on 9/10 consistent

Matt

Please have Hessi on more. She can actually make me laugh

TallSquirrel

Hesse's giggle is so adorable. Love her impressions and asides. She's consistently funny and has great rapport with Will and Felix.

Budget Hireling

When Will/Felix makes a reference that goes over my head: Pretentious, mansplaining, BOOMER When Hesse makes a reference that goes over my head: wow she’s so cool. This is my fault, I should have watched every film from the year 1957 just in case she made a throwaway comment.

Schwartz666

Sometimes you need to rise from the trough, and oink for all to hear.

CS

Damn, what happened to Anand? He was always a bit of a goof, but he used to at least be able to construct a sentence.

etienne

alltime Chapo Moment

Agent Grange

I can't believe Hesse doesn't think the Holocaust happened. We need to get the word out that Hesse doesn't think the concentration camps were real. We need people to know that Hessa watched the entirety of band of Brothers but when they got to the part with the concentration camp she said "Well that never happened."

Agent Grange

Honestly y'all between this and Liz I think we have a real problem of antisemitic women on the left.

True Horror Productions

Its pronounced "Period-T" but straight guys cant pronounce the silent T correctly unfortunately

chronye

AYO CHAPO - why was matt’s superdelegate video not included in the reel?

chronye

oh my b i just didn’t finish the reel

Agent Grange

The article at the end talking about how Brat Summer is about stories over policy really has me timewarping back to when Proudhon said that the first and most important step of making a classless imperial structure is manipulating the power of storytelling to create a volkist myth to organize around in place of class division.

Kat Berkley

Amusingly, I heard about 9/11 from the radio as a kid

KES7774

RFK JR has a mothafuckken chainsaw. He skinned that whale’s ass raw. And if his campaign keeps going this way he might just break something tonight.

Gubriel

I heard him say spermaceti and without thinking my feet started carrying me toward water

Gubriel

His illustration is honestly so underrated. Look at the little houses in Strega Nona. The birds that rest gently upon them. He could draw a chair that was so perfectly chair-like it would knock your head off

Mathamphetamine

This is like watching Colbert going into the pocket of Hill Dawg

Mark Schneider

I appreciated Hesse's "The House that Jack Built" reference about 12 minutes in.

Jack Hand

The reason I love podcasts is because of the radio. Bit jarring hearing Will make fun of listening to the radio. I mean what does he think he’s doing if not talk back?

Ian Stratton

They're doing a pun on "payola"

Laura

How do you talk to kids about political violence? Well, all those kids have been having active shooter drills the whole time they've been going to school.

Declan Kennedy

I saw this comment before I listened and I got excited for a discussion of one of the best internet guys of all time, the only man ever to play Bubsy the Bobcat for over 500 United States hours, but alas

Andrew Cross

The patron Saint of wiping grease off pizza, and doing a 1.4 billion damage in Disgaea

Ksizzle

This is rambling and incoherent. But sounds good man 👍🏼

Ksizzle

Cannot be stressed enough, everyone who graduated before like 95 cannot relate. I mean I can’t relate either as a canadian, but I can only imagine the way it shapes your psyche

Smith's Fine Electric Amusements

Hesse, it's named after SAINT BENEDICT, the monk. The one who Benedictine monks are named after, not the Pope. That's not his real name, he changed his name to that when he became Pope, that's this stupid thing Popes do. I'm not even Catholic and I know this. lol.

Kevin C

The book of Joe is the worst Bible story

Schwartz666

The Corn Pop parables were pretty tight tho.

Salt M. Bank

Anyone else not getting this episode in their podcast app?

George Gallowgay

“You've seen the movie, now meet a real life Noah! Only this Noah has been accused of killing two of every animal! Coming up next on A.M. Springfield!” S9 e14, missing reference at minute 3.

Mark Schneider

Will's only half-right when he says Trump doesn't hug his adult kids. I'm sure many others recall when he ass-grabbed Ivanka during the 2016 Repub Convention. He's into that and it half-counts!!

Fernslinger

Brilliant username! A million points for George Gallowgay!

J O T

Your a nerd

Taylor Leibel

While Trump was in VA he also stopped by a like Asian cultural center/shopping center to talk to Vietnamese voters and apparently when they tried to get him to eat pho or something he said "I love Vietnamese food, but I love the Vietnamese people even more!!"

M Varnzo

No one asks how muc heroin he was on at the time?

Mitch

My 7 year old knows the CIA put JFKs brains all over the car.

Nolan

When will the Zapata hats be restocked?

Budget Hireling

I can’t believe the Order of Vishnu’s Fury finally got to him 😢

Budget Hireling

Wow didn’t even post a screenshot with your new card, I guess you HATE AMERICA

mruskin

In fairness, there's some truth to the idea that storytelling in politics can be more important than simply enumerating policies & facts. After all, Will & Matt made this point quite forcefully when Chapo reviewed that Pod Save America guy's book many years ago. The issue is that the article's author doesn't explain *what* story or stories these new Democrats are telling and to what ends (another issue is that he writes very poorly, at least here). Instead, he is entirely obsessed with novel messaging and fails to explain why this is of any greater significance.

Michael

Right. This also explains the relative difference in success of Bernie and Warren's messaging. The policies were often similar, but Bernie packaged them in a more compelling (and true) story: the rich and your boss are screwing you over, class solidarity is the way to fight back

Michael

Honestly, Anaand's article kind of makes sense if you read it as a comparison of Warren and Harris. Writing's still putrid tho

Joe

Suppressed (kidding, I think the iOS version of Patreon had an update that kicked everybody’s login credentials)

Joe

Hessa? That traitor?

Ham Stroker’s Jackula

RFK Jrs life story is all cut footage from “me, you madness” deemed “too over the top”

drizzly_november

‘48, she was the first Kennedy to die in a plane crash, kicking off a cherished family tradition.

Luggi

Ik Felix just making a joke on comedy podcast, but the VA most definitely does not work how it should. Had to wait 4 months after my dad had a tumor to finally get checked out if cancerous or not, my dad had to go to urgent care three times until the urgent care doctor finally was like "PLEASE LOOK AT THIS MAN NOW. ALL MY CANCER SIGNALS ARE TINGLING. URGENT URGENT". Hits close to home since I'm pretty sure he passed because it spread too far in those initial months for any treatment to kill the cancer 🥲 not sure why VA doesn't work, but it definitely doesn't work all the time.

Jordan Brewer

Bethany Mandel screaming like Flanders when Trump was thrown to the ground

busty maiden

okay.. cutting a small tree with a chainsaw will coat your clothes and hair in sawdust. sure wonder what thats like with a whale!

Stop the Spread

Hesse, I didn’t know gay n*****s still said, “Periodt!”

Nick Stanert

Hesse was funny this ep. Mellow

Kamran Husain

insane how rfk dropped the tiny lizard today

Joe

Kidding! That “try meth once…” line about an hour in totally redeemed her TrueAnon supporting sins

Dogface Reilly

You guys are kind of missing the whole point of the Robert F Kennedy sawing off the head of a whale story. This story is further proof that we live in a simulation which is making an allusion To Moby Dick. RFK in this perverse retelling is splattering whale brains on the roof and trunk of his car in a direct reference to Dealy Plaza. RFK was driving down the highway at 80 miles an hour with a plastic bag on his head, a dead whale on his roof, screaming” AT HELL’S HEART I STAB AT THEE!!!!!”!

MCL

Jerry Seinfeld got what he deserved

Derwood

“The New New Deal” just started Thomas Frank’s “Listen, Liberal” so this really struck lol

Shannon

many have been saying it!

Tyler Smith

Who else is thinking patriotic goth for Halloween costume?

William

Holy fuck being a lib has to be exhausting

William

Probably after the order gets submitted to the manufacturer

Nolan

Isn’t that kind of what I’m asking?

William

God this bit is so fucking tired let it die

William

This guy should kill himself for saying, “big feels”

Dick Must Bust

Shout out to my favourite Dire Straits lyric

Last Years Man

So not only do both stories involve Kennedy messing with animal carcasses, they both involve driving multiple hours with the damn thing in/on his car. wtf.

wonderfell

Hesse’s cigarette comment made me try Parliments today. They are mid imo Hesse what do you mean best cigarette?

Last Years Man

Hesse: Herzog made a documentary called Little Dieter needs to Fly first

Leyland

Turned my partner and son gay by introducing them to the early pittverse

Last Years Man

Where are the left's hats? Fucking shoot me.

Baby truck

Does anyone know the ep when they had old mate on discussing the Brazilian election?

Matttttttt

So glad we got to hear Hesse say “perioddd”

TimBob RN

What did Hesse say at 16:55 that made everyone laugh ? I can’t make it out .

Michael

Oh for sure. I just think this writer being a Warren 2020 guy is key to his argument. Any narratives an improvement on that shit lol

Tom

What’s wrong with tech ceo Racial Jake

K H

Patriotic goths are real and also the worst people. Presumably they grow up to be JD Vance.

K H

"He got drafted" it sounds like.

K H

I didn't know he had freezer for it that is bigger than my first apartment. What did he do with the whale head? He is more like a Stephen King character.

Drew

Of all the wonderful Chapo regulars, Hesse is my goat

Ryan

Listening to this on my walk in the local cemetery Will is so right they’re beautiful green spaces

Shiv

9/11 is the Titanic of WTC attacks PERIOD

Shiv

can confirm only hear subpar things from family and friends

William Beamish

too much grass in most cases but there's definitely exceptions

K H

Vietnamese shibari. Hesse adding "or whatever" to that like I add lol to "step on my balls?"

K H

?

K H

Chris was on point with that 9 demonic voice edit on "why were you spared?" You are not seen, but you are heard.

K H

Are you...are you joking?

Michael

I mean, Felix is right that every politician says they’ll fix the vet. It’s just none of them actually do

Daniel Rohe

The diehard Biden supporters gotta adopt #bidennomatterwhyden

Shiv

right; therein lies the nuance.

Jack Perry

“Story telling” is literally just marketing jargon

Ryan

Nope! I’m fortunate to live by a truly beautiful one that’s right next to an even larger arboretum (overlooking a peony garden)—great for casual birdwatching as a result, I often see orioles in the mornings. It’s not for everyone but it’s a learned trait for my mom and I have two good friends who do the same. Bonus: historical cemeteries (plenty in the NE) are a great vacation spot. Also Hesse’s right they’re usually so empty you can post up and smoke some weed and read a book or something. Not for everyone but I certainly love them.

Vivian Irby

SMH Felix, it was Skull Face who said "I'm burning up," The Fury had the much more iconic "I came back from space!"

Jimmy McMillan

"When we get into office we're going to balance the budget, solve the border crisis, and finally fix the broken VA." That's the sound of politicians yapping

Tyler Sutherland

Why the fuck was a kindergarten teacher trying to talk to toddlers about 9/11, and why the fuck did they act so immature and call a child's parents to take them home when the child doesn't understand what the fuck 9/11 is? I'd tell the teacher to suck me sideways and threaten to sue the school for trying to waste my kid's time like that. Fuck ooooff

Dan

If that were the case I’d vote for the MFer.

Dan

Ngl the second sentence made me legit laugh out loud.

Noah Mickens

In the implicit contest for the permanent third member of the cast, Hesse's not it. Alex Nichols maybe.

Justin Zuberka

I was dying at work listening to yall recount the rfk jr saga.

Greasy_Jones

Hesse's RFK impression is HAUNTING

MKatieUltra

Some brewey needs to make a Whale Juice hazy IPA

MKatieUltra

Omg my dad used to show off his surround sound system to anyone who came to our house with the Flight of the Valkyries/napalm scene from Apocalypse Now

Welch

Joe Kennedy Sr. was the one who named the original Kick Kennedy!

Andrew Jordan

I understand where Felix is coming from but no, the VA is a fucking nightmare to navigate. As someone who watched his Vietnam vet father die because of VA beuracrats and fuckups, politicians say they support veterans and they're all full of shit.

Khemith

What were the issues specifically?

Andrew Jordan

He was actually exposed to Agent Orange and had to take a medical retirement due to his health issues. After several years of submitting paperwork and being examined and interviewed, and almost going bankrupt, he was given a 100% disabled status by the VA. Because we lived in rural SC, there was no VA hospital near us and when he had to go to the hospital (which was frequently) the VA would say that it wasn't covered and try to make him pay, despite being 100% disabled and, technically, not supposed to be liable for medical debt. When he got really bad and he had to be placed into a home, the only one that took VA coverage was one of the worst in the area. Most rehab or care centers won't take the VA because they are so late in paying/cheap.

Last Years Man

I think Felix was being ironic there. The joke is that if every candidate for the last 30 years has said they "fixed the problem" than the problem can't really have been fixed. (my uncle also suffered from the orange crush and died blind in a wheel chair)

John S

I love that after Ratt and Motley Crue and Twisted Sister were mentioned, the needle drop was Quiet Riot.

Khemith

Watching the DNC twist itself to prevent any material benefit to the general population is amazing to watch. Next election cycle they will have to murder someone on stage at the convention to maintain the dopamine rush.

Last Years Man

Covering a British garage band no less.

Ryan Gullage

I was thinking about the death of Harold Bloom when I picked up the Canadian critic Northrup Frye, who defines the "anatomy" as a genre that explores intellectual inquiry and dissects the human condition through satire, irony, and parody. It’s characterized by intellectual abstraction, fragmentary structure, and, often, a detached tone. The anatomy does not rely on character development or emotional engagement but instead focuses on ideas, often critiquing social norms, intellectual systems, or philosophical thought. The form organizes vast knowledge into structured, often humorous critiques of human folly. Frye identifies the anatomy as one of four primary modes of literary expression, the others being epic, tragedy, and comedy. What makes the anatomy unique is its intellectual breadth—it gathers a wide range of subjects and presents them through a combination of satire and encyclopedic detail. A classic example of the anatomy genre is Laurence Sterne’s Tristram Shandy, which exemplifies this form by using digression, parody, and reflection on various aspects of life and literature. Another example is Thomas Browne’s Urn Burial, where seemingly disparate observations are tied together through reflection on human mortality. What is particularly fascinating in Frye’s discussion of genre is how he connects these literary forms to broader cultural and psychological functions. For Frye, genres are not rigid categories but fluid, evolving forms that express deep-seated patterns in human thought and culture. His theory of literature is cyclical, rooted in the rhythms of nature and myth, where different genres correspond to different seasons or stages of life. The anatomy, for Frye, is tied to the intellect's need to critique and organize the chaotic aspects of human existence. Frye’s idea of genre also departs from traditional classifications based on form or subject matter (like romance or realism). Instead, he sees genres as modes of structuring human experience, tied to broader mythic archetypes. The anatomy, for instance, parallels the role of satire in myth, which often seeks to deconstruct or expose contradictions in culture and society. In contemporary terms, Frye’s anatomy genre resonates with postmodern literature, which often blends irony, parody, and critique. Writers like Thomas Pynchon and David Foster Wallace create works that mirror the anatomy’s encyclopedic and fragmentary structure, emphasizing intellectual critique over emotional engagement. In summary, Frye’s anatomy is a genre deeply concerned with intellectual exploration and satire, organizing complex knowledge into a form that deconstructs human systems and behaviors. His broader discussion of genre illuminates the dynamic, evolving nature of literary forms, reflecting deeper psychological and cultural currents. The whole passage reminds me of that Orangutan who’s gonna get the office again.

Violent Delights

Sir---------you didn't mention Robert Burton?

Jonny Blade

What up, Bloomy? Sickness unto death. Sickness unto death. Good stuff. Have a great Hamlet seminar! ….

Jonny Blade

I don’t know what these mic grabbers are going on about. Reading brain-damaged Mark Fisher taught me that politics is downstream from culture. Fact.