Trustless Shadows, CH 16 (Patreon)

Claws walks on two legs as he goes to the door. I’m barely aware of him. Jason is here. I pay attention to what he’s doing until I hear claws against metal.

He has four arms now. The top two have clawed hands, and he’s forcing them between the door and the jam. The two below them are larger and end in thick, blunt, hands made for punching or pushing.

“You won’t be able to—”

He rips the door out.

I stare. He shrinks as the effort catches up with him, but he shouldn’t have been able to do that, unless I’m wrong about the rooms being cells for demons.

Jason is out of the room and running at me, arms extended. “D, you’re alri—”

I shove him back, hard. He almost falls, but Claws catches him. I don’t think either of them realizes it. Claws is panting, Jason looks pained.

“D, what?”

“Don’t call me that,” I growl. I get in his space and he tries to back away, but Claws is behind him. “My name is Derick. You lost the right to use anything else when you lied to me.”

“D—Derick, I didn’t have—”

“Don’t bother lying to me. You had me believing the people I was helping were good, that they deserved to be saved. I trusted you.”

“Derick, I did the best I could.”

“No! You did what you wanted! Because of you I had no idea what the world was really like! You had me kill people who were just trying to survive!”

“He saved your life,” Claws says.

“I don’t—” I look at him. “He what?”

“After you were hurt.” Claws is back to being four-legged, and Jason hurriedly steps away from both of us. “After the one who made you stabbed you. He called me, told me what had happened. He told me where you would leave the building. He begged me to come rescue you.”

I remember the voice on the radio, guiding me to the exit where Juliette came for me. I look at him, at this human, trying to understand why he did that after all the lies he told me.

Jason opens his mouth, but I ignore him. “Wait, how did he call you?”

Claws cants his head. “I had a phone. I showed it to you.”

“Yes, but how did he even know your number?”

“Derick— ” Jason begins.

“Shut up.”

“I had one of the human I used give it to him. Derick, I do not believe this is the time— ”

“That guy spent his entire time lying to me, and you don’t think I’m warranted in wanting to know how he knew about you?”

“Derick, I didn’t want to lie to you,” Jason pleads.

I snort. More lies. “I saw the recording of when I was made. I heard you plan the lies you’d tell me.”

He sighs. “Yes, at first I didn’t have a problem with it. You were just another psychology project, the best one ever offered to me. I got to create a person from scratch. Do you have any idea how amazing that is? How difficult?”

I don’t react to his enthusiasm, although I can feel the anger rising.

“After a while, around the time Manda set you loose on the demons, I began seeing you weren’t just a machine. You weren’t just reacting to our programming, you were making choices outside those parameters. You ate extremely healthy, except you also drank my brand of soda, even though you can’t stand anything too sweet. You tried to get to know the people around you. It didn’t help you fight demons, so why were you—”

I look away from him, and he stops.

One of the scientists is edging his way out of the room, staying against the wall, as far from Claws as he can. The demon looks at him, impassive.

The human stops moving when he notices me watching. I vaguely recognize him as one of those who worked in the armory. Like Jason, he’s dirty and stinks. His hair is gray and thin, his beard thicker.

“P—Please, I just want to go home.”

“The building is surrounded by demons, and they’re also inside.” My voice is forcefully neutral. I want to grab him and throw him back in, then close the door and lock them all in, Jason included. “You won’t survive the attempt, and you’d reveal to them that the door’s open. They’re going to come down here and kill everyone. You want to be responsible for that?”

“I didn’t cause this!” His own anger makes him braver.

Claws should have left them locked in. They’re going to be nothing but trouble now. They’re going to get themselves killed. Or worse, I’m going to have to protect them.

I look at Jason. “Convince him not to go anywhere.” I walk around him to join Claws.

“What about the others?” he asks.

Claws stands, giving himself a somewhat-human form. “You need to release them yourself.” He leans against the wall, his form fraying.

Jason takes a step back. “I can’t. This whole floor was designed to go on lockdown without power. Amanda didn’t want to risk the demons they had at the time from escaping. Before your time,” he adds, looking toward me. “That guy, Adam, he shut the power down after putting us in here. It came back earlier when they brought in the soldiers, then it went out again. Can’t you rip out the other doors?”

Claws shakes his head. “I’m too weak. I was counting on you to help us free them.”

“You don’t have to look human,” I tell Claws. “Not for them.”

“They are not the enemy, Derick.”

“They’re not people you should be exhausting yourself more for either.”

Claws looks at me, impassive.

“I’m sorry,” Jason says in the silence, “but without the power, there’s nothing I can do.”

Claws looks around me. “Where is the power controlled from?”

“I don’t know, the utility closet I guess?”

“Speak,” Claws says, and I turn to see the gray-haired scientist lower his shaking hand.

The human is terrified, I can smell it from here, even over their stink and the demons’ scents permeating everything. “If I tell you, you have to promise to let me go.”

“Really, Thompson?” Jason asks. “They’re here to rescue us, and you’re going to bargain with them?”

“Rescue?” the human chokes. “That’s a demon. Those things eat us. It’s probably here to round us up and feed us to its buddies.”

Claws steps toward him, his form flowing back to four-legged. “You are not food.” He sniffs the human. “You are refuse.”

Jason looks at me apologetically. “I’m sorry. Manda’s been spreading the propaganda since before I got here.”

I roll my eyes. “You expect me to believe you don’t believe it?” I keep an eye on Thompson and Claws. The human slowly backs up. Claws stays with him, looking almost amused.

Jason shrugs. “I used to. Before you, I didn’t have anything to do with demons. I heard what’s on the news and figured that was true. I know better now. You want to know how he found out about me?” He motions to Claws. “There’s a bar I go to. It’s far from here, so Manda didn’t know about it. For the last, I don’t know, quite a while actually, I’ve been bitching about work there. I didn’t say anything about you, but if he had anyone watching the building, watching me, and they followed me there, they would have known I wasn’t happy with how things were going here.” He rubbed his face. “There was a time or two I drank too much and I might have said more than I should. I woke up one morning in my bed, with the guy I’d brought gone, and a note with a number to call if I ever needed help.”

I study Jason, trying to figure out if he’s lying again, and why he’d do so. I have no idea. I look at Claws. “Well?”

“You need to decide. I cannot be the one to set what is true or not for you.”

“This isn’t— ” I sigh. “Okay, fine.” I locate Thompson, wedged in a corner, pressing himself in as hard as he can to stay away from Claws.

“Thompson,” I call out, “you guide us to that utility closet, and we’ll let you go.”

Jason grabs my shoulder. “You can’t do that.” I look at his hand and him, and he takes it away as if he’s afraid I might bite it off. The fear could be justified. “They’re going to kill him.”

“I’ve already told him what’s out there. If he still wants to leave, I’m not going to hold him here against his will, or tell him lies so he’ll stay.”

Jason looks away, but he speaks again. “When they catch him, they’ll realize someone set him free. They’re going to come here to kill everyone, you said so yourself. Can you kill Adam if he knows you’re coming?”

“He will know we’re here the moment the power comes on.”

“Just turn on this floor.”

“Do you know how to do that?”

Jason opens his mouth, then closes it. He turns. “Thompson, do you know how to turn on individual floors?”

The scientist’s skin has lost almost all its color, and his eyes show almost entirely white.

“Claws, unless you plan on eating him, give him some space.”

My words make the human look in my direction. He focuses on me, then looks away. Claws has gone back to the doorway, while the other humans cowered back further into the room.

“Thompson, focus.” Jason snaps his fingers to get his attention. “Do you know how to turn individual floors on?”

“Of course not. I only know where it is because the cartridge-making equipment is next to it, and I saw a janitor working in it. I can get you there, but after that you deal with it.”

“Jason, you need to make sure the others stay here while we’re gone.”

“I’m coming with you.”

“No, you’re staying here with them.”

He leans in, getting in my face. The stench is overwhelming and he has to know the effect it has on me, but I don’t move. I am not giving him the satisfaction.

“I’m not getting back in there. I’ve spent what feels like an eternity locked in there, pissing and shitting in a corner, terrified out of my mind. I will talk to them. I’m going to explain you’re here to get us out. They’ll stay put. After that, I’m coming with you. You leave without me and I am going to make you regret it.”

The smile I give him isn’t friendly. “And how do you think you can do that?”

He glares at me. “Don’t push me, D. I know your buttons.”

My smile falters as I try to work out what that means.

He smiles and pats my shoulder. “It’s good to know you can still get stuck overworking a problem. Don’t leave without me, D.”

I watch him enter the room, still confused by his words. Claws slumps to the floor and I go to him. “You need to hunt.”

He shakes his head. “I’ll manage.”

“You can’t take Adam on if you’re weak.”

“Hunting Adam isn’t the same if I’m sated. I don’t just want him dead, I want his flesh to nourish me. I will take what he is and make it part of me, make something good out of the horrible thing he is.”

“If you’re too tired, I’m not letting you hunt him. I’ll kill him myself to keep you safe.”

He smiles. “If you’re so worried about me, then you can weaken him before I hunt him.”

“That’s allowed?”

He snorts. “How do you think we teach the young to hunt larger prey?”

Jason comes out of the room with the lamp. “Okay, they understand the situation and they’ve promised me they’ll stay on this floor. Shouldn’t you let the military guys know what you’re doing?”

I shrug. “Unless you have a way to talk to them through the glass, there’s no point in bothering.”

Jason looks at the window. “Right, soundproof. Okay, let’s get going?”

I glare at him. “You’re not in charge.”

“I didn’t say I was, but is there anything else we need to do here?”

Claws steps between us, forcing us apart. “Guide us,” he tells Thompson as he gets closer to him.

The man pulls away again. “W—we’re going to have to take the stairs.”

“How do you think we got here?” I reply.

He swallows and runs for them. I notice Claws twitch. Fighting the urge to chase him? In the stairs he almost trips, and Claws grabs him. The man shrieks and we all freeze, listening. When no sounds fill the stairwell we proceed again, Claws keeping to the back.

“D, I’m sorry for what you went through, for my part in it.”

I don’t want to listen to him, I tell myself. It’s all going to be lies. Only, what if it isn’t?

“Tell me why, Jason. Explain how you could do this to me.”

He sighs, and I can see the reluctance. “You were just a project at the start. My entire career is built around the concept that it’s possible to program the brain, that if specific methods are used, the results will always be the same. It was always just theoretical work, until you came along. I couldn’t believe my luck when Amanda approached me.” He chuckles. “Of course you invalidated all my theories, you realize that, right? You’re nothing like what I was aiming for back then.”

I glare at him.

He raises his hands to placate me. “It’s not a complaint. I’m happy you became more than what I made you. I noticed small details early on. I never taught you to ask for someone’s name. You should have waited to be told. I told myself it was minor, insignificant. I justified them away.”

He was thoughtful for a moment. “It was when I assigned you your room that I knew something major had happened. It was set up based on how I’d trained you. It should have felt like home to you, but you didn’t care for it. The first thing you did was question me about the paintings. What was their purpose? Why had the previous hunter wanted them there?”

He pauses as we reach sub-ten, and I hold the door for him and Claws when Thompson walks in as if he was alone.

“Beauty is learned, and I’d taught you to enjoy it.”

“I’d never seen a painting before.”

“Right, you don’t remember that part. That was before you were awake. That was something implanted directly in your mind. That was what my thesis was about: direct programming on a mind. The first four months of your life were spent being programmed to be the person you are.”

He paused and frowned. “No, that’s not right. To be the person I wanted you to be. You ended up being someone different. But yeah, your apartment was when I knew. I should have…I don’t know, put an end to it, but at first I wanted to study the differences, figure out how to fix them.”

He sighed. “Then I made the most basic mistake: I stopped thinking of you as a project. You became My Man, D. By then you and I were in too deep, I didn’t know how to just stop it. I thought that maybe I could get you to end it. I thought that if you saw how the rest of the world was, you’d notice things weren’t right, but you never did.”

“We’re here,” Thompson whispered, opening a door.

The room is large. Jason’s lamp lets me see the work tables with machines on them. I can smell gunpowder.

“The janitor’s door is over there.” He points more or less in the direction of the door I can see, which he clearly can’t. It’s the only door at the back of the room.

I head to it, Claws and Jason in tow. Inside is a panel six-feet high and two-feet wide. On it are four columns of horizontal black switches. I flick one, then another, but nothing happens.

I turn to ask Thompson, but he isn’t with us. A light comes on in the other corner of the room and I watch as he straightens, holding a rifle.

“What the hell, Thompson?” Jason exclaims.

“Move away from them,” Thompson replies. “I don’t want either of them to use you as a shield.”

“Thompson, put the gun down. They’re here to help.”

“Don’t be an idiot, Gourd. That’s a demon, and that thing you and Walker made went over to their side, just like the others. I’m not letting either of them get out of here.” He shifts his aim from Claws to me. “Don’t either of you move. This might not be loaded with irradiated rounds, but the caliber’s high enough it can blow your head off.”

Claws lunges as Thompson moves the rifle. I have my gun out at the same time that Jason jumps in front of me and the rifle goes off.

Jason staggers back into me, and I drop my gun to catch him. I lower him to the ground as I listen to Claws rip into the other man.

“Why did you do that?” I growl at Jason.

He looks at me, confused, then winces as pain has to start registering. He glances down to his right arm, to where his right arm should have been, and screams.