demo 108: the cape (Patreon)

SDC! greetings from the train up to glasgow. this week I play the 3 biggest headline shows of my life so far in glasgow, manc & london ! last few tickets for each here - come through : ) I'm feeling STRONG and v good about singing my little heart out this week

this demo is an ENAH contender song from the archives that never made it: ‘the cape’ / ‘wear the cape’. I wrote this w Lauren & Tom, my first attempt at the hero theme. we wrote & demo'd this the day after we wrote kiss ur face so we were in the BIG, FAST DRUMS mindset. it’s really interesting listening back to this - we really tried to make this song work - it came down to middle farm & went through about 3 different iterations after this, before I decided to put it aside. I was frustrated at the time but sometimes there’s no logic to these things sometimes.. it just wasn’t making fully clicking for me! but it’s clear to me (especially after the fact) that this song needed to be written in order to get to the next one.. even the discarded songs inform the process & end result! it really does all happen for a reason in the end :)

if you’ve joined the SDC this month - welcome! you may have seen me on stage this month praising this patreon and the creative freedom it gives me as an independent artist.. I really can’t overstate the importance of it enough, so thank you for coming aboard and helping me do this mad thing. how the demos work is that you can stream them within the patreon website and mobile app (where you can save offline, too) and/or you can download the mp3s for keepsies. if you’d like to start working through the demo archive, you can start here - it’s still missing a lot of the earlier years but it’s on my list to populate it properly when I get the chance! 

as always (I’m freeeeaking outttt) - no fr as always, let me know what you think! comments and feedback always welcome - any feelings or thoughts the demo provokes, any questions it brings up! 

I have a vague memory of writing this and having this music vid/movie sequence in my head.. (sometimes having imagery helps the writing for me) - it was like a line of teenage girls in capes, all lining up and going through their superhero training. kind of a play on those films where girls in posh schools go through training on how to be ‘a lady’ - wear corsets, use the right cutlery etc etc.. but sort of the opposite of that? like girls unlearning being polite/ladylike and instead learning to be strong, stand up for themselves, stop people pleasing. it also felt a bit ‘be a man’ from Mulan? (tuuuuuuune).

anyway - SDC, I love u. wish me luck for these mega shows this week! I’ll be thinking of y’all when I’m up there! gold tier patrons - news incoming over next few days re our next live stream/zoom hang x

lyrics:

I don’t wanna be that girl

crying out to be saved 

I wanna be the hero

I wanna wear the cape, I I

bruises on my knees

mom look i’m so brave

iiiiii

I wanna wear the cape

you’re looking at me weird and I get why

i used to be afraid to be alive

so desperate to be anything you like 

on any given day 

god I was such a sponge, a chameleon 

blend in to the wall

until you aren’t anything at all

remember to shut up and stand up tall

you can be like i was

you can be a sponge, a chameleon

we’ve been people pleasing, we’ve been half asleep

I’ll be bigger, louder and if that makes me 

the world’s biggest bitch

fuck it

I don’t wanna be that girl

crying out to be saved 

I wanna be the hero

I wanna wear the cape, I I

bruises on my knees

mom look i’m so brave

iiiiii

i wanna wear the cape 

i’m sure, i’m going tough

my hand is in a fist, my chest is puffed

i’m gonna punch some holes and blow shit up

i’m stepping^ on cars and those who do me wrong 

call me king kong

no more people pleasing, keeping it so sweet

i’ll be bigger louder and if that makes me

the world’s biggest bitch

I don’t wanna be that girl

crying out to be saved 

I wanna be the hero

I wanna wear the cape, I I

bruises on my knees

mom look i’m so brave

iiiiii

i wanna wear the cape