demo 83: mine (Patreon)

hey gang! here is your february demo, a soft (but heavy) song called ‘mine’.

***I’m going to put a slight disclaimer on this one - it’s not uncommon for me to curse in previous demos - and this song has a curse in it, but more than that is v vulnerable & personal. I feel this is a safe space for me to share this song but if you’re someone who might be triggered by a song that references assault & the healing that follows, this may be one to skip. it’s more sad than it is in any way vulgar - but still I’m aware of how delicate the topic can be and I would hate to upset anyone. just wanted to say***

I wrote & recorded this song on a stormy night on my trip to copenhagen this month - it was a rly fruitful writing trip. i’d wanted to write a song like this for a long time but I think I needed the headspace of being away w lots of solo thinking time to really get my head around how to approach it. as always, you can stream the demo within the patreon site or iOS app (where you can save to listen offline) or you can download the attached mp3. as always, feedback & reactions are welcome in the comments

lyrics:

you’re just a boy

and I’ve heard about boys

yeah you take what you want and you leave us in pieces

I was an optimist

you said it seemed like I wanted it

and ever since then it’s felt like a weakness

now it’s not easy to do

it’s taken me 28 years to let anyone touch me the way I let you

kiss me

slowly

but not so gently

whisper a word in my ear like a secret

melted like butter

always the fucked

never the fucker

rewrite the rules and start from scratch again

now it’s not easy to do

it’s taken me 28 years to let anyone touch me the way I let you

I still the remember the time

I looked you dead in the eyes and I realised that my body was mine