Movie Night (Patreon)

There's a fairly recent Reese's Peanut Butter Cups commercial, set in a theater, where the mother shields her son's eyes from the (not so) 'scary part' of the movie...and then promptly steals not one, but two pieces of the kid's candy.

Weird what you find inspiration from sometimes. :P

Monday is always movie night at the Possible residence, the family wanting to relax and watch a good flick after what is usually the most hectic day of the week. As educated people, they make a game of it, of sorts. One person chooses the genre: horror, comedy, drama, etc. The next step is to choose the sub-genre: slasher, slapstick, docudrama, etc. And the last person picks the title.

Tonight's chosen flick is a good old-fashioned slasher movie from the 80s, with a hockey-mask-wearing antagonist stalking the counselors of Camp Crystal Lake to avenge his mother’s death.

The first time Jim had tried the old hole in the bottom of the popcorn bucket gag, Kim had smacked him in the mouth. None the wiser, the rest of the family simply stared at her in confusion, the redhead stomping out of the room in a huff. The second time, he tried it on Ann...the mature woman discovering the surprise with a knowing smirk, not letting on that anything was amiss. Halfway through watching the newly appointed Sheriff of Rock Ridge dispense some comedy frontier justice, she buttered the remaining popcorn with Jim's leavings...the youngest of two Tweebs fighting the urge to blurt out and draw attention to what was happening inside the popcorn tub.

Tonight, however, was not the usual family get-together. Kim had been called out on a last-minute mission, off to Kathmandu or some such to hunt down a suspected cryptocurrency pirate. Tim was upstairs and too busy to come down, a virtual mountain of Hicka-Bicka-Boo Productions video footage that needed to be edited into a coherent "adult comedy". That left Ann and Jim, the former already sitting on the couch, waiting for Ann to join him.

Years had passed since he'd first tried the bucket gag...it never got old...and, yet again, here he sits, the familiar red and white tub of salted, buttery goodness already sitting in his lap. Moments later, a freshly showered Ann sauntered into the living room, her favorite pink bathrobe loosely tied at the waist and a towel rapped around her wet head. Fingering the play button on the remote as Ann sits down beside him, Jim gives her a salacious grin as he grabs a handful of popcorn, popping a few of the puffed kernels into his mouth. Ann rolls her eyes with a knowing smirk, stealing a few pieces from the bucket for herself.

Twenty minutes into the old horror flick, Ann has yet to delve into the bucket, instead huddled tight against the young man, gripping his arm as Jason stalks his first victim. If Jim didn't know any better, he'd think that she was genuinely scared by the hokey old movie. Ten minutes later, the familiar 'ch ch ch ah ah ah' announcing that something bad is about to happen to yet another camp-goer, Ann again clamps onto Jim's arm, hiding her eyes from a camper’s impending demise.

Ann: God, I can't watch this!

Ann relinquishes her grip, long enough to pull the bucket off of Jim's manhood, a dozen or more yellow puffs scattering across his lap from the hole in the bottom. In one swift motion, the redhead pulls open her robe, wheeling to swing a leg over the young man's lap. Grabbing hold of his member, Ann lets out a scant squeak, guiding herself halfway down his fourteen-incher. Jim can only stare up at her, wide-eyed and dumbfounded.

Ann: Just... Just keep me occupied until...

Hands at Jim's shoulders, Ann bounces and squirms, glancing over her shoulder as a fear-stricken camper bolts through the woods in the dead of night.

Again, the television emits the tell-tale, eerie sound that precedes the hockey mask. Ann all but yanks Jim forward, his face smooshed between her substantial d-cups as she cowers against him. Eyes squinted shut, Ann can't watch, truly scared of...a horror movie. It isn't until she hears a muffled voice that she opens her eyes, the scary part having seemingly passed.

Jim: (muffled) Ummm... Hello? Can't breathe.

Download it here.

Original Art by Gagala

Edits by Phillipthe2