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how are you? the virus, the fear, the future...plus some hope from the melbourne bushfire benefit show with neil (Patreon)

Published:
2020-03-12 04:21:07
Imported:
2026-06
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Content

{public post}

kia ora, my loves....

first of all...please, in the comments....tell me how you are doing.

i don't often askl that because it's a shit ton of comments to read, but right now, i need to know. and everyone else will scn through them too and feel less alone.

don't forget, we are we.

SO....

how are you?

WHERE are you?

are you STUCK anywhere? 

out of work?

quarantined?

working in a hospital? a school? are things canceled?

are you....

out of work?

out of money?

afraid?

okay?

talk to us, please. talk to each other. this is our community. we are here. let's do it.

everything feels threatened right now. our little fragile social human body-organisim is being shaken.

i'm not a panick-y anxious type, and even i am feeling a low grade anxiety at all hours of the day. my neck hurts. i feel frightened being in a different country from mu husband and kid. the news, the unknowns....things do not feel okay right now.

so for my panic disorder people and the people who are extra-prone to anxiety: SELF CARE!! slow down. don't spend every moment with your face glued to the news, baths, walks, whatever your self-care routine is...do it.

remember i love you.

and also....

because of the virus, MUSICIANS and ARTISTS ALL OVER THE WORLD ARE LOSING GIGS and so many of them live hand-to-mouth and have no safety net. so many of my friends in the art and music industry are nervous and not going to be able to make rent this month, or pay for food. WE CAN HELP THEM. together with rhinannon giddens, i am gonna hopefully make a statement and galvanize help for our out-of-work artist friends...we are going to try to basically create a list of musicians hard-hit by the show-cancellation nature of COVID-19 and try to encourage people to CROWDFUND THEM - a kind of karmic bridge-loan that doesn't need to be repaid. 

you know how this could work, because you use patreon. let's get it going. i know this virus is going to effect everyone our of work in the gig economy, but my little wheelhouse is to look out for my touring musicians, so please watch this space...

we. can. help. 

if anyone on this patreon has time, a computer, and a good heart, put your hand up. no gaurantees that i'll need you - but if you have time to help, i may message you!!! my staff is already stressed. i may need hands and heads to compile lists of artists who are crowdfunding.

ALSO: if you KNOW AN ARTIST OR MUSICIAN WHO IS FREAKING OUT BECAUSE THEY CAN'T MAKE ENDS MEET BECAUSE A TOUR, SHOW, PLAY, GIG, ETC HAS BEEN CANCELED, LET THEM KNOW THAT WE ARE CREATING THIS LIST AND ASK THEM TO CONSIDER STARTING A CROWDFUND. we can add them to the list, and we can get their back!!!!!

as usual, i want to help, but it can be hard to organize on the fly. we will do what we can do.

i'm also open for names of what to call this effort. i'm literally late for soundchecl right now and  flying by the seat of my pants. BUT

i did write a new song for the show tonight, about how it wouldn't be the WOSRT to be trapped in auckland....

i mean, i am a little anxious about being away from my husband and kid.

but look at the view.

i am here.

i am now.

so whatever happens...the view is okay?



so yeah......greetings from aotearoa. [a note for the americans and europeans, and anyone else who isn't from around down here: there's a movement afoot for "new zealand" to undergo a name change to "aotearoa" ("OW-tay-a-row-a"), which is the traditional name of this land. (pronunciation youtube video here and you can read about the petition to change the name here.]

sorry-not-sorry for not posting, especially in these whirring last few days of breaking global news, but it was all i could do to pack up my stuff in australia and clock a little timer with ash and get to my flight to aetearoa on time.

there's a lot to talk about. holy FUCK. the news just hit that trump has banned travel to the Us from europe has hit a lot of people hard.

neil and i had fraught discussions night before last about whether we even wanted to separate. 

getting on an international flight and being away from my husband and child really does not feel fantastic at the moment. it really doesn't. it feels awful.

i decided to come anyway.

my shows here are all sold out except for christchurch.

............

NEWS FROM THE BUSHFIRE BENEFIT!!!

it was just INCREDIBLE.

we raised over $25k AUD at the show to split between two really fantatisc organizations

firesticks alliance, who work on educating people about cultrual bunrning and land management, and SEED MOB, aka Seed Indigenous Youth Climate Network.

members from both groups came and tabled in the lobby, they were all super-psyched and super grateful and goddamit we gotta keep doing all we can do to help these guys.

(as mentioned many tmes before...moving forward, ALL THE PROFITS from the record will keep going to firesticks....if you haven't heard the record yet, it's getting stellar reviews. go listen to it).

some of the best show reviews aren't from newspapers, and this blog review really captured the benefit.

read it ....

http://natatree.com/2020/myself-my-grief-neil-gaiman-amanda-palmer-the-bushfire-event/


.................

if you want to look at a whole pro gallery of photos from the event, check out this google drive link from photgrapher Rick Clifford....

https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/16SPw2tnZqMZnYU3ZcYi8rGG5GVcnkqa9?usp=sharing

hayley has been back in the states scrambling to get shots together for this post but rick just sent these in....so if you want a great overview, follow his link above, none of us have time to grab them all and import them into the post....but here's a start....

neil backstage with the guys from firesticks alliance....


and here's some more....we auctioned of the BEDSHEETS from the HAMER HALL show and made an extra $1k!....and before the show, we hung em in the lobby.....(thanks xanthea and beth)....

photo by @badseeddan

all photos below by @ThornburyRocks unless otherwise noted.


we invited both charitites to take stage and talk about WHAT IS GOING ON.

here's me with the folks from seed mob.....

and with the guys from firesticks....

HUGGGGGGG

SINNNGGGGGGG


joined by special guests CHARM OF FINCHES....who are a 15 and 17 year old sister duo from mebourne that i met (i shit you not) at the airport on my way to gig in tasmania....


and we were joined by a surprise tom dickins....

photo by cat willmot

the incredible fred leone wore a ton of hats. he performed in his own mob's language, told stories, and acknowledged the country we were performing on. then he joined both me and neil on didjeridoo....it was so beautiful.

photo by cat willmot

photo by rick clifford

ALL TOGETHER NOW.

from left to right: fred, tom, neil, mabel and ivy from charm of finches, and yours truly.

neil, mabel, ivy, me.

photo by cat willmot

JORDAN, my beloved manager, had a birthday on march 5th, and we CAKED HIM. that's xanthea o'connor on the left, who helped out with the whole show. she's been a real hero while i'm been down here, helping both me and neil and the whole team with bushfire-related stuff. we are so fucking lucky to have such amazing people.

photo by cat willmot

ivy and mabel from charm of finches.

photo by @grandtixu

AND!!!! VIDEO!!!

fred recorded a video of "Black Smoke", the cover of emily wurramurra from the new record..... which i performed with charm of finches. he streamed it on his facebook page, you can watch the archive below....

GOOSEBUMPS, you guys. GOOSEBUMPS:

https://www.facebook.com/fred.leone.5/videos/10158224791282318/UzpfSTI5MDk0MTcyNDM5NTEyMzoxNTUwNjM4MzMxNzU4Nzgz/


fred with ivy and mabel...

me and neil and the firesticks mob....

photo by amos atkinson

jordan, neil, me, tom, ivy and mabel from charm of finches & all the guys from firesticks....

photo by fred leone


THE SETLIST....


photo by xanthea o'connor


LAST CALL - BUSHFIRE CHARITY POSTER....

art by sarah beetson

https://linktr.ee/apmerch

£25 in the uk store
$35 in the usa store
$50 in the aus store

ALL THE PROFITS WILL GO TO FIRESTICKS.

............

i would say more, but i'm late for soundcheck.

check in.

i love you.


x

a





------THE NEVER-ENDING AS ALWAYS---------

1. if you’re a patron, please click through to comment on this post. at the very least, if you’ve read it, indicate that by using the heart symbol.

2. see All the Things i've made so far on patreon: http://amandapalmer.net/patreon-things

3. join the official AFP-patron facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/afpland

4. new to my music and TOTALLY OVERWHELMED? TAKE A WALK THROUGH AMANDALANDA….we made a basic list of my greatest hits n stuff (at least up until a few years ago, this desperately needs updating) on this lovely page: http://amandalanda.amandapalmer.net/

5. general AFP/patreon-related questions? ask away, someone will answer: patronhelp@amandapalmer.net

 

UPCOMING SHOWS:

Fri. March 13th - AUCKLAND, NZ - Auckland Arts - Hollywood Avondale - (SOLD OLD)

Sat. March 14th - CHRISTCHURCH, NZ - The Piano

Mon. March 16th - WELLINGTON, NZ - St Peters Church, Wellington Fringe - (SOLD OUT)

Thurs. June 11th - BOSTON, MA - Symphony Hall - An Evening with Amanda & Neil with the Boston Pops

Fri. June 12th - BOSTON, MA - Symphony Hall - An Evening with Amanda & Neil with the Boston Pops

ALL TICKETS: https://nointermission.amandapalmer.net 

Files

Previews only

Comments

Belinda Mansley

Hello from Tasmania - Australia. If i were to be honest with you guys, i don't feel like i have a plate big enough to fit all the things going on right now. The biggest thing that has been happening recently, is that my Aunt had a benign tumor removed from her spine via surgery last Friday. She can only feel pins and needles in her arms and feet. I know that's a good sign, its just that my Aunt and her side of the family are either ambivalent or highly dramatic about things. So much so, that we were only told about this tumor late in the piece. as well as this almost surreal happening, my own mum has the condition known as Fibromyalgia - i may have spelled it wrong- which is basically like arthritis but in the muscles. She has had a sore shoulder for the past week and a half, and there is nothing i can do to help, she is in agony with it sometimes and it's painful to watch her going through it. I have a fear that i have some form of it as well, I have been told the condition is hereditary , but i feel i can't spell that out to my mum. i just say i have a sore back, and she blames it on my being overweight. I am also studying at UTAS in Launceston, where a person has been diagnosed with the Virus, and there is a real risk of the face to face tutorials being moved to being fully online. This worries me because i learn better face to face, and my self-motivation is crap at the moment. it's a victory if i take care of my body as it is. On top of all this going on, i have complex PTSD, anxiety and dissociation disorder, I found myself looking out of a window during a tutorial at Uni yesterday, thinking "I wonder if this is high enough" I couldn't seem to get that thought out of my head for the whole day..even now. Why am I like this? I'v resorted to buying the odd thing to wait to come in the post, to give myself something to look forward to. I feel a little pathetic writing that down. A Patron pin is one of them, along with other random things like a special present for my sister's birthday, A poster, beanies, a Harry Potter replica and a necklace. Like i said Really random. It feels really weird writing this all down to people who don't know me, and that i don't know other than Amanda. Who i was lucky enough to meet a couple of times and hug. Please forgive my grammar and spelling and rambling, my brain can be a jungle at times. But if you have read this far, I would like to say THANK YOU and I Love you . Sending virtual air hugs to each and everyone of you. B.

Zowie Jones

I am a nurse in Germany, not directly in contact with the virus but it's in our hospital. We are all pitching in with extra shifts to cover the colleagues that stay home because they are scared or have flu symptoms. Disinfectant is being stolen (by patients, visitors, employees) and the patients are scared. A lot of the patients on our ward have risk factors. I am fairly calm, but walking through half empty supermarkets or seeing people with face masks (the wrong ones) on the street sends chills down my spine. It just feels very weird. I am sorry you are seperated from Neil and Ash and I hope the reunion will happen soon and without any problems. (((())))

Kathryn Drew
>>33609802

That is a lot to carry. Thank you for still being here. I love the small gifts to self that you have organised. So beautiful. Sending a huge hug from NZ xx

Anonymous

Yes, I want to help with this. I saw a post on FB yesterday where a band's gig was cancelled, so they did it anyway and videoed the set and played it live on FB. Only thing missing was a link to send them some cash. Could this be a thing to organise? Where there's a central-ish place for live recordings and we give into the hat and watch what we want? Like virtual ninja gigs? I'd totally be down for that.

Anonymous

I'm coming late to this post, because as we all know, things have been crazy. I feel like I'm one of the lucky ones suffering least from this pandemic/collective panic. I just got word yesterday that my school is cancelled and we'll be attempting to proceed online, although much of our classes are hands on making classes, so we'll see what an online props-making class looks like I guess??? I'm just waiting for the official word that all of our films will be cancelled/delayed and it feels like all the work from the past few months has been for nothing. I'm afraid if one of my grandparents gets sick that I won't be able to go see them. I work in a restaurant and people don't want to go out right now so I'm losing work, learning, making, and so much time. I want to be with my family, but they are more miles away than I have dollars in the bank. I'm not one to panic either, and I'm not outwardly afraid. But I can feel the collective fear finding it's home in my bones, underneath my skin. I want to be with you all right now. Even that would help. I want collective love and support, and it may be virtual, but at least it's here. I'm thankful for you all. Everything will be alright if you let go.

Anonymous
>>33610457

Know your work is appreciated. I am very thankful especially for those still caring for all the other patients that need help.

Rhys

Im pretty sure my mom (in NH) has it. She never ever gets sick but she has a cough, a cold, and a fever. She is also miserably unhappy. I dont think she is in need of medical care but oretty sure she has never been this sick in her entire life, indeed I can count the number of time she has been sick in my life (I'm 42) on my fingers. The news is all about social distancing and how to survive the boredom but nothing about what to do if you get this thing, other than that there are no tests and that fits with the fact that her doctors office was pretty dismissive when she called, nothing they can actually do. I spent last weekend with her and i now have bit of a cough of my own and my chest feels tight, so I'm guessing i probably have a mild case of it. I don't know what to do, my mom is alone and she didn't prepare at all. She's really the only person i have so my instinct is to go and stay with her while she is sick but nobody is talking about the specifics of what happens after you get this. If i have a mild case, will it stay a mild case if i go and stay with her and am exposed to her not so mild case. Or will that just make me sicker as well so that im no use to her anyway? As recently as last weekend she was teasing me for being so concerned about this and for actually buying groceries. I am usually the person who has nothing more than a container of mustard in the fridge so my reaction to this and the amount of effort i piyt into planning out meals with the assumption that i wouldn't leave the house for 2-4 weeks surprises even me. Im so mad at her for not taking this seriously and im terrified that something is going to happen to her. Meanwhile my bf was also exposed when i was last weekend and he still isn't taking it seriously, he is planning on going hiking (alone) this weekend and i am so mad at him.

Anonymous

In Darwin we are fine, one one case and he was a tourist. No community transfers here. I saw a wonderful message about supporting local artists by not demanding refunds if the show is cancelled. It was money in support of the arts anyway, so why not leave it there to help them through this tough time of cancelling gigs. Venues, crews and artists needs our support.

Emma Mahon

Greetings from Ithaca, NY. I actually am sick (I think it’s a mixture of allergies plus a legitimate cold), so I’ve been stressing out a bit. I have a compromised immune system but I’ve managed to stay well, for the most part, this winter. I work with an after school program with elementary aged children. As of last night, they’ve shut down the local schools until April 13, so I’m not working. (I’ve already missed almost a full week’s worth of pay since I’ve been sick this week.) My husband works as a Teaching Assistant for a school, as well. Fortunately we’ve saved about two months worth of rent money, but times will be lean. Before I moved to Ithaca, I used to work in data entry for over three years. If you need any help, I have a computer, some skills, and a month’s worth of free time. Some of our friends are artists and musicians, I’d really like to help out the community in any way that I can!

Zowie Jones
>>33637125

I am sorry you and your Mom are sick. I hope both of you make it through okay (((())))

Kirrabelle Lovell

Amanda you are such a legend for promoting these great Indigenous Australian groups with your music - thanks!!!

Michela M.

I'm in Italy, locked down and working from home since the 5th of March, all relatively normal for me (I don't have more free time than usual, I'm an introvert and can stay inside and find things to do), except long queues at the supermarket as we enter only one by one as another person exits, and they closed all gyms and studios so no yoga lessons 😑. But that's how you flatten the curve. So stay safe, keep your distance as much as possible, wash your hands. It's going to be alright, hopefully. 💖

Anonymous

Dear Amanda, You ask me how I am and what I worry about and I am so glad you asked. Thank you! I am also glad that I have to answer English which isn’t my first language, because this makes me see things from a slightly new perspective and express them without the words and phrases I use by routine. (Shit, this will get long and I am still basically okay.) I live in Sweden and I have trust in the experts and the government in this corona emergency, although I am aware of some criticism that they are too lax. I am glad we have a goverment which focuses on making it economically possible for people to stay at home. But we are not all quaranteened, schools are not closed, etc. I am not sick, have no specific reason to believe I carry the virus, and I am not quaranteened. I am not panicking. But I am worried. They are low intensity worries, but they are starting to pile up. I don’t know how long the bookstore I work in will be able to stay open. I am hired by the hour so if the hours dissapear I have no job and not much of our social security network applies since I haven’t been fired, etc. I can normally stay home if sick, but it is just ”not work” not ”sickleave”. Another job I had lined up at the end of April will probably disappear, although the word right now is that they are looking at alternatives. I have friends who are panicking and all I can do is watch because anything I say that doesn’t fit their end-of-the-world scenario, they will take as if I am not taking it seriously and thus part of the problem, if not actively trying to kill them. My mental health is... well I stay afloat but I am not very stable. When my friends are panicking I have to work hard to not get dragged along. My remaining grandparents are both over 80 years old. Morfar lives in a temporary nursing home waiting for a place in a permanent home. We don’t know if he will have to move on Monday or not (every Monday). He has Alzheimers and does not understand why he can’t go home to his apartment and the woman he’s been living with for 15 years (she wont let him – a whole other story). He has moved four times the past month. Already stressing for a man with dementia. Now all elderly care homes have locked down so he is not even allowed visits from a familiar face. His partner won’t allow him to phone her because she can’t (or doesn’t want to) deal with his feelings. Mormor, on the other hand, want nothing more than to mive in at a retirement home. Her old body is frail and she gets worried when alone. She has Parkinson and not only does that knowledge worry her, it also causes anxiety as one of its symptoms. But she is not sick enough to be allowed a place in a home. We, children and grandchildren, have tried to support her with regular visits because she gets anxiuos when alone. Now we are not forcibly prohibited from visiting her but let’s say we are strongly adviced against it. So, do I give her anxiety attacks or lung disease? Which is the morally least bad thing to do? Maybe this quaranteen is protecting them from the regular flu and other things that could be just as risky for them. Was that a cough? (No, I still don’t have any symptoms of a mild cold which might be corona.) Why do people need four years’ worth of toilet paper? We have a steady production of toilet paper i this country. (Most of it is forest. If we have one stable industry it is paper.) What other random panicky thing will people start doing? No. Back off. That is one thing I cannot worry about until it comes. Drop it. Breathe. My mum is fine. Met her yesterday. But she carries the heaviest load in fighting for my grandparents, and she has got a job which has exploaded in work load and responsibility in the corona crisis. All I can do for heris listen and agree that things are mad (mostly the uncertainty about granddads living situation). Dad is fine. That is, he would never say if something was wrong because it’s all part of life and one shouldn’t complain. I can tell he is lonely and I see signs of depression. His wife died in November after years of increasing dementia. Of course he’s not fine. Their two dogs died during 2019. His home is empty and quiet. Except for a clock which ticks loudly and chimes every quarter of an hour. And again this instruction to not visit the elderly. All I can do for him is call and talk about nothing in particular. And every time we agree on that it is difficult to get thing started, finished, done, get up in the morning. And that it is boring to cook proper dinner for one. To end on a positive note: I worry less than usual about what I am doing with my life. Will I ever get a job related to my education? Who knows. But I know I’ll get by on my normal consumtion of toilet paper. So, here’s to all of you in this lovely community, whether you read this far or skipped to the end, take care, stay safe and try to not panic! <3

Anonymous

I’m a substitute teacher so, I’m out of work for at least two weeks. I miss the kids and hope they are doing okay.

Anonymous

Hello dearest Amanda and all the Patreons of this wonderful human: I am writing to tell you all the state of things in Seattle, Washington, USA, from my perspective: I am a contract worker, teaching swing dancing to groups of adults and kids. I also do DJing at social dances and events, and perform on occasion with my dance partner. Being that all events and group gatherings have been indefinitely postponed, it doesn't feel like I have any ground to stand on. Dance is the biggest part of my identity, and it makes me realize that in times of intense struggle, some people rise and others fall and need help up. I feel like I'm falling for sure. I'm really concerned for all the small businesses, all the service industry workers, and all our states of mind. I want to stay calm, I try to imagine "it'll all be over soon..." but in trust, we have no idea when "soon" will be. I have a meager savings account, so I'll dip into that for rent and food and bills, but I'm worried for the months to come. I wish for us to rise up TOGETHER, but together isn't really an option, at least not IRL. Virtual friendships and social media has never been my priority, because I choose nature and hugging people and looking into their window-soul eyeballs while we talk. But it seems important now to take stock of friends and supportive humans wherever we can. So I write to tell you all - it's NOT looking grim, we are all being smart and staying inside, cleaning surfaces very well, and at least for me, I'm praying a lot. my version of prayer looks like meditation, gratitude, to the sky above, earth below, living things on this planet, and unseen friends from the great beyond. I call on all of them to bring courage, peace, and safety in these times. And then, I feel a little less alone. Thank you for reading, thank you for being. Gracias Por Ser. <3 <3 <3 Becca