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so...tanya took us on a walk through her garden and it was filled with hundreds of caterpillars getting ready to turn into monarch butterflies.

she gave ash a swan plant in a little pot and two caterpillars to take home and he named them simon and honghang.




there was a third tiny stowaway that he named bella when we found her after we got home, but i can’t find her today, which makes me sad. someone on instragram who understands bugs suggested the big ones probably ate her. at least she went back into the food cycle...?)

tanya explained to ash the sad thing that happens with the wasps.

they find the caterpillars when they are in their fragile metamorphic state, hanging there on a leaf, and they kill and suck the life out of them. i was sitting five feet away from tanya and ash, examining my own caterpillar, when i heard her say it:

“things are at their most vulnerable when they are changing.”

quote of the year, tanya.


hang in there, everybody. nobody said pupation was easy.

there are wasps.

i love you. i really love you. about to drop the podcast with masarat daud and it’s a fierce one. tune in.

xx

afp


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Anonymous

I’m here. That’s what matters right now. Trying to build myself up after a New Years of extreme sadness and drinking. I am beautiful. I am not this worthless person I was told I was. I can build. The alcohol makes the tears come so easily because it very much lowers my resilience (and increases my cortisol). So I’m saying hi and doing what I can

Natalie Gelman

Thank you for sharing that quote and Tanya for those words. Hitting very deeply right now.

Anonymous

Damn. Couldn’t be more pupal than I am right now. 😬 🐝

Susannah Marshall

As the UK plunges back into a state of cocoonment, I am cheered by the knowledge that I might get regular updates on the transformation of a caterpillar called Simon.

Alexandra Duma-Dancai

Good words in a good time. I lost my job in December and have been feeling very vulnerable and insecure ever since. I feel like an exposed caterpillar. So irritable and whiney, i don't like this part of myself but i know I'll find my inner calm and grow some wings eventually.

Jozias

Presented with a weird contrast. I was in a cryptocurrency study when I found this. Stop. I'm interested in both. Nature is amazing. Thanks for sharing this. It's certainly a must go for children. I'm still happy of that part of my childhood. So to relate. A sort of torching to me, kids may get exposed to crypto's too. Will we help them with that? We wouldn't prevent them. No, I wouldn't. Uncovering crypto's is a choice to me I don't make with as much enthousiasm as discovering nature details. I wish we could have a back to basics. Uncovering crypto's doesn't make me happy. Hard to realise some kids never get to discover nature. Maybe they get best at crypto's. Counting blessings. Just a thought, thank you for making me share. I love you, Amanda.

Anonymous

Amanda, dear, thank you so so much for this! I read it today and it have me so much Energy to just keep on living through this day, through this time full of uncertainty, confusing and self-doubts. Thank you a million. I love you.

Carolina

Thank you beautiful community. And thank you Tanya and Amanda for your wisdom- really resonates right now. Grateful. Thank you.

Frau Tiger

Quote of the year, indeed. Thank you for writing this down - I needed to hear it today. All the best!

Piper Warnick

When I was about Ash's age I brought home a caterpillar, but another kind of wasp beat me to it. Instead of watching it change into a butterfly I watched a another insect hatch out of it. It was both sad, a little bit gross, and very educational about the way nature works. The things that seem so calm and cute and innocent, are all in a desperate fight for survival. I'd like to write some elegant parallels between that in our lives, but I don't have the words right now. All our I have recently discovered a song that feels very relevant here. Dan Reeder's Born A Worm, If you have not heard it yet I highly recommend! https://youtu.be/qMEXBwFbdoM

Misty Prostko

Learning these lessons as a child sucks, but it’s better than learning the hard way.

Lyssandra Norton

I just switched from teaching to nannying and it’s breaking my heart I needed this

Jessica Urban

I just did early disability retirement from teaching and it's breaking my heart not to be in that role anymore, even with all of the ableist prejudice I experienced at the school from other faculty. I love teaching and miss it so much. Much love and solidarity, Jesse