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the second shot cuts the deepest (Patreon)

Published:
2021-06-26 01:39:29
Imported:
2026-06
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hallo loves - just a quick phone quickie

and

YESSSSsssssSsssss

just got pfizer jab #2! …and i can add to the anecdotal stories that after having zero side effects from jab #1, i felt like ABSOLUTE ASS starting about 24 hours after i got the shot, for about 12 hours. not sick, but just wanted to be in bed and nowhere else. deeply exhausted. that was last night.

i now feel….amazing.

neil got his first pzifer jab too, yesterday. he was tired but okay.

the feelings of general emotional relief are sort of indescribable.

it’s a simple jab, but it carries such strange connotations and weight. the future opens up.

i’ve been reading many comments from social media saying that the little vaccine jab also brought tears and big sobs.

i get it. it’s hard to explain exactly how it feels.

meanwhile - props to the oneroa health center on waiheke island, aotearoa, and to all the people working to make it happen. every part of the vaccination process was kind, organized and flawlesss.

thank you, thank you, thank you to them…and how’s this for small island life:

nooroa, the guy who MC’s our local karaoke night, was there to greet me as i walked up the stairs to get the vaccine.


by night, karaoke hero

by day, vaccine hero

he’s got it covered.

how is everybody else around the rest of the world going wirh getting vaccinated?

how is it all feeling in covid-world? sydney just want back into lockdown. my friends in the UK sound frustrated. my friends in new york sound exhausted but happy.


how are you? where are you? how is it?

tell me.


x

afp




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Comments

Melody

Oh gosh. This is such a relief. Glad you've got yours and the process is running smoothly there! I've been at full immunity for a bit over a month now. I think May 16th was the date? I somehow thought it would be the end of my loneliness and feelings of isolation, instead it only amplified them greatly, because I can no longer justify to myself that the reason I'm alone is for everyone's safety. I thought I'd start planning social things as soon as I knew when I'd be immune, but the shot has changed nothing about my financial stress, or how hard it is to take care of myself, living on my own, as a person with chronic illnesses. Which is to say, I have no extra energy to plan any social interactions, nor any extra money to pay for them. My friends are all focused on seeing their family, working their jobs, going on long awaited vacations, while I'm still trying to rebuild everything from scratch. I've seen some people, but not enough to satisfy my cravings for love and affection, not nearly enough to feel like I belong anywhere, or anyone wants me in their life. I did luck out with a class pack to the local aerial circus gym, purchased on sale on 1/1/2020, untouched and waiting for me to come back. But of course with the chronic illness, picking up exercise again, especially something as intense as aerial, is going to be slow going. I'll make friends at the studio, but only as often as my body can handle the stress. And I'm feeling more stable in my apartment, since Seattle's eviction moratorium is extended through September now, and there's some kind of protection for people who experienced financial hardship in the pandemic for an extra 6 months. But I'm also feeling incredibly trapped in my apartment. 600sqft is hardly enough space for my entire existence for two years. In the past couple weeks, there was some kind of glitch with my unemployment benefits. A record of a job I never worked, from October 2020 to March 2021, got added to my work history, thus changing my benefit eligibility. My benefits are currently on hold pending investigation. They have been for two weeks, with no updates, in which time I have burned through the one-week buffer I spent the last three months scrimping + selling tickets for things I'd wanted to go to, to try to build. I don't know when I'm going to have that income back. I posted on Facebook about the problem, with my PayPal link, and a few people chipped in to help, and, in want of social interaction and people to feed me, (and because there is, bonus, a massive heat wave on the West Coast this weekend and my apartment's AC unit only barely manages to cool half the space on an 80 degree day), I've packed up myself and my cat and am staying with friends in a rural house with big trees and shade and even better air conditioning for the next week, hoping my unemployment gets fixed before I go back home. So I'm trying to rest. And get time to be around people. And, after one night of sleep, one morning, it does feel a lot better just to be here. And even this wasn't the magic bullet I was hoping for, to fix everything. I've rescued my brain from the fear that I won't be able to eat next week. But two weeks from that still terrifies me, and there's still not much I can do about it.

Claudia Rapp

Waiting for my 2nd jab, ten more days ... And I had to get away for a few days; it's been too long and too sad (play coin-operated boy, Amanda, I keep getting too sad) ... the safest bet from Germany was Austria, because both our numbers are down, and their rules said, 21 days after 1st jab, you're allowed to enter the country, stay in a hotel, eat in a restaurant etc. So I went to Vienna (posted on Twitter about seeing the piano you played in September, 2019), and it was as magical as ever. Meeting friends, meander-walking through the sun-drenched city, sitting by fountains and in parks, drinking beer and cheering at the pride parade, seeing one adventure-illusion shattered and reviving another ... I thought if I went on a trip, I would come home content, fortified for the rest of the pandemic. But, surprise, now my longing for travel & people & adventure & connection & chemistry & sparks flying has become even stronger. I don't know what to do with it, but it's a sweet ache.

Stephen Hanrahan

I got my first vaccine early cause I’m still technically a cancer out patient still waiting on my second . The vaccine is only opening to the late 30s now

Elizabeth Gunn

I got vaccinated in March, even though I am a wee young thing, because I was working an election. I'm feeling pretty shitty about everything, New Orleans is just feeling like a dumping ground for tourists to come behave badly in (which it was before but that's a different plaint). I went to pick up my husband last night off of Frenchmen and it was just, sloppy, not a mask in sight, lots of entitlement and shitty rudeness and I KNOW we're a tourist city but I feel like we got fucked so bad at Mardi Gras 2020 with Corona because we're already a place that visitors feel like they don't have to take care of, but we are a sweet tender rough beautiful city and we need people to not treat us like garbage or like Disneyland or like we're not real. Anyway. All this to say that I've been kind of working back up to playing shows but last night made me really really not want to participate in that world.

Anonymous

Out of the woods, got my 2nd jab (Pfizer) 2 weeks ago. Relieved, but still cautious. Both parents fully vaccinated too, so good thing to finally see them in person.

Jamie Pope

I got my second shot in May. I was quite sick for days, but I'll happily take that over COVID. Ever since the CDC declared that masks are no longer necessary for vaccinated people, that seems to have meant the pandemic is over despite the less than ideal vaccination rates. Nobody's masking anymore in the southern US, everything is back to full capacity, and I'm still battling serious crowd anxiety, which I'm starting to believe may not go away. Disheartening. I used to love being around throngs of people. Anxiety wasn't really a part of my life. And now I feel like I've aged at least ten years since COVID began, I'm not interested in partying anymore, and I am still so afraid of people. Last night I was pressured to go to a busy restaurant and nearly had a panic attack. Couldn't get out of there fast enough. But I'm doing okay with small groups, shopping, and uncrowded public places. So I'm getting tastes of normalcy. And those have made the COVID nightmares stop after over a year of them. Hope. Bits of joy. I want more of those. So many more. But even vaccinated, I am still at risk due to my heart. I cannot get this virus. So for now, and for the foreseeable future, I am someone I don't recognize, someone I don't want to be.

Amalija Vitezovic

You know what's bizarre? Despite living in a country full of various problems (mostly because we're run by a bunch of greedy idiots) the vaccination is going smoothly and is very well organized. Strangely enough, Serbia not only has enough vaccines for residents but also gives the possibility to foreigners to get vaccinated for free and without almost any administrative hussle. So for me it feels a bit surreal to see so many people online getting so emotional about their vaccines (of course, I completely understand them!), while I got mine in January/February in such a simple way. If it weren't for anti-vaxxers (I was unpleasantly surprised by quite a number of people who are still sceptical or even outright hostile to vaccines), I would even be optimistic.

EmVT

Neat to hear everyone's experiences from around the world, here in Vermont we are completely out of lockdown and starting to vaccinate teenagers. Appreciate hearing the struggles of those profoundly affected by the pandemic, because I'm in a bubble within a bubble here, and need to hear what is going on in the real world. Just got back from a three day residential sesshin (meditation retreat), our first since the pandemic. Twenty-four people in residence and another sixty on zoom. Despite everyone being fully vaccinated to be able to attend, we still wore masks for some activities (chanting). It was glorious to be back in person, we are collectively cautiously optimistic. My friends in Toronto still have a ways to go, like Anna said. The schools in Toronto keep opening, then having to close due to positive covid tests. Canada doesn't have any vaccine manufacturing, so the rollout is slower. I felt tired after my second shot, but slept it off pretty fast.

Amanda Denery

I’ve been fully vaxxed since may, double Pfizered. I had a similar experience of just wanting to crawl into bed and stay there the entire next day but otherwise perfectly fine. I’ve ventured out a few times eaten at my favorite restaurant twice, even went to a drag show, the level of anxiety on that was pretty high. Here in Nashville it’s, well… still Tennessee. My confidence that those not masked are actually vaccinated is incredibly low, but what can you do? It’s not “normal” again, yet so many people act like it is. The biggest thing frustrating me is how people forgot to behave in a society while I was away. The aggression, entitlement and general rudeness seem to have kicked into overdrive across the country. Just like in the zombie movies… it’s the survivors that are the scariest part.

Anonymous

I was incredibly lucky and got fully vaxxed by March. I was working in a residential unit all last year (my second job is as a mental health counselor) and we shared a parking lot with the local health department so they gave us an open invite. The first shot I barely felt anything afterwards. The second one I remember waking up in the middle of the night, realizing I felt like shit, and then going back to sleep because I didn't want to be conscious for the post-tax shit show lol. And then the next day I was mostly just a bit sore and lethargic. Most of the people around my area (Bowling Green Ohio, USA) didn't get vaccinated until the past month or so. Ohio is one of the states that has started a million dollar lottery for those who have been vaxxed to entice people to get it. It's crazy. I did not have "worldwide pandemic lottery" on my covid bingo card. But things are going back to "normal" here pretty quickly. The local college turned one of the sports arenas into a massive vaccination clinic for about a month or so, which made me incredibly happy. And I finally got to go back to my temple (Zen Buddhist) in person for the first time in a year an a half and I've started playing live gigs again! My heart is full but my mind is cautious. And my social life is very much making a come-back and it's a bit overwhelming. And last I checked, our cases continue to steadily decline. So there is a lot of hope in this corner of the world.

TheCreepyGirl

I wish I could be surprised by that welcome. I would think everyone in the world would be like my family, friends, and I. Which is to say, we stayed away like we should and now, somehow it's a Utopia...but no...and in some cases worse. I hope you see better than I've seen in your travels. (crosses fingers for some travels for you)

Anonymous

Got my 2nd Moderna & feel like I’ve been run over by a bus. Still better than the alternative!