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Hi Everyone.

This is a joint statement from me and Neil.

Neil is posting this on his blog as well. (And I posted it over on mine, as this is a closed post). 

After many years of marriage, we have made the difficult decision to divorce. While we will no longer be partners in marriage, we will remain in one another’s lives as co-parents committed to raising our wonderful son in a loving and compassionate environment. We deeply appreciate everyone respecting our family’s privacy so we can focus on our son and entering this new chapter in our lives.

Love.

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Anonymous

Love to you all, change can be difficult but doable ❤

Jo

❤️

Laura Payne

Sending you love, and gentle heart healing hugs, dear lady. ❤️❤️❤️

Robyn Pearson

I'm sorry to read this. I love you both. See you next week. ❤️❤️❤️

Tym Rourke

Love to you all during this transition, Amanda.

kristen

Sending love and hugs

Suzanne

Saying it here too... Love to you all as you navigate the technicalities of it all. And kudos to you for doing what's right for you and Ash regardless of what anyone else thinks.

Leila H

Sending all three of you a huge wave of love and the biggest hugs ❤❤❤❤❤

LJ

Love to you both and Ash. 💜

Jennifer Pelowitz

Sending love and hugs and compassion to all of you during this.

Pedro B. Gorman

Oh my god, Amanda, Darling! My heart is COMPLETELY with you and Ash, you beautiful, strong, woman! I adore you, I see you, I appreciate you, I love YOU! Yours, always with you, Ash and Brian Pedro.

Katie Ní Mhaoláin

All my love, Amanda. This must be so difficult. Sending hugs ❤️

Jo Ashby

♥️ to all 3 of you

Kayleigh Griffiths

I’m so sorry. I was hoping so hard you could pull through the storm. Love to the three of you.

George Lepauw

Respect for always doing your best all around 🙏❤️‍🩹💜

HeatherAsh Amara

❤️❤️❤️ blessings and love and thank you for being you fully, fiercely, vulnerably, and for having clear boundaries. I so deeply respect you. You are so loved.

Julie Sweetin

May this new chapter in your lives be beneficial for all of you ♥️

Keni Beth

Sending love to all three of you as you move into this new phase of life.

Robert

Love to all of you! ❤️🖤

Pedro B. Gorman

And thank you SO much for the beautiful webcast tonight, thank you! What a balm. Let me know if we can do anything more for you, sweetheart! You do so much for us!

Cameron Locke

Never an easy decision, I wish you both ease in process and comfort in knowing you're both doing what's right for you and taking your sweet boy into consideration at the same time. All of the hugs and hot cups of tea.

Litsea

❤️

Elisabeth Kauffman

Sending love, and the hope that you can make space to heal your heart.

Joni

I'll say it again here... Holding all of you in my heart. There's simply no easy way to go through this. As a child of divorce, I can only say that Ash is so very lucky to have parents so clearly focused on him. Do what you need to do, we'll be here if you need us / when you're ready. Love you bunches. ❤️❤️

KarenD

Good luck. Good decision. Go well x

kevin reeves

Love indeed. Blessings to each of you. 🤍

Lucy

So much love Amanda, to all of you ❤️

Veronica

Sending love to all of you as you navigate this chapter of your lives.

Marin Page

Best wishes and empathy as you navigate this time.

Ash Anderson

You are loved and treasured. May you find serenity and joy on your path, even as you journey through the difficult moments. You are loved and treasured.

JhonnyOnasis

Love to you three. And the webs you’ve created.

Phil

I'm sorry you have had to go through this.

Lee Lawmaster

Wait. Does this mean I have a chance? FINALLY. My life's dream can come true! All jokes aside, my divorce was one of the worst things I have had to endure in this lifetime. I can only assume the pressures and challenges you have faced have been on levels I can only dream about. You have my deepest and sincerest wishes for healing on all sides. Show that kiddo all the love, and you'll never go wrong. So, uh, Amanda my dearest, my heart and soul are open to you. They have been for many years. Let it out, let it all out. You know how to get a hold of me. I'll let your people call my people. :) *I only hope the equal parts comedy/enthusasim/sincerity can be read.

Melinda V

Sending you hugs. I know the thought and heartache that goes along with this decision. I wish you both well. Ash is lucky to have parents such as yourselves. 💜💜

Hev

Sending hugs, wine and a warm blanket 💚

Matt Clements

Also sending love and support ... so sorry to have folks make you feel pressure to have to make a public announcement, but I guess that's fame and fortune blech

Ruby Lee

You are both awesome for working together to raise the kiddo despite your relationship problems. My parents could never really manage it. It messed us all up to sucked into the wash of bitter, resentful parents that bashed each other and weaponized us against one another. It created broken kids that become broken adults. :( :( :(

Brennan Pettie

I’m sorry to hear you two headed in different directions. Love to the three of you.❤️

Ash Lozano

Love to all of you ❤️

Emilly Orr

Love to all three of you. Endings are always difficult, and I am sure Ash will understand, especially if you're committed to still being there for him as often as you both can. Take care of you.

Deborah Schwarz

Love to you and your family. Navigating these waters is, at best, difficult. But the rudder is now yours and you get to decide when it's time to return to shore.

Lara Burke

sending all of you big gigantic piles of hugs 💜

Barry Wilson

I hope the three of you are all doing well considering 🤗 🤗🤗

Larissa Rook

I am so sorry. Sending much love to all three of you.

Len Tower Jr.

continued love to all three of you -len

Bob Dillette

What else can we do but send love to all 3 of you. 💜💜💜

Abby Lee

Divorce can be a wonderful thing. I've never liked how it's supposed to be this "dirty word" much like abortion. I imagine the 3 of you have lots of love ahead and that's the most important thing.

DrWex

It is always sad when two excellent people cannot be excellent together. I hope this new chapter is good for all three of you.

Kimberly Lay Fraher

I'm sorry. I'm sure it was a very excruciating decision to make, especially when there is a little person involved. I confess that I got to know you through Neil, as I am a fan of his writing, but it was your openness and willingness to be vulnerable that made me want to support you as an artist. Your poetry is remarkable and I'm here for it. Strangely, even though I don't know you or Neil personally, I feel like I do when a friend couple of ours is breaking up. As stated over and over above and below my comment, you are loved and appreciated and we are here to hold you up at this time. Much love to you.

Lynn Parlett

Divorcing well and with kindness and a continued commitment to raising your child in a good way, is not easy - but done well is an amazing act of love. You got this.

Melanie Stormm

Love, growth, joy and however much privacy you need to each of you. ❤️

Sheila L. Kalkbrenner

Sending love, strength, patience, and peace as the three of you evolve through it. <3

Carmen J

Love always for the journey ahead for all of you. <3

Alaina Jones

Sending lots of love, deep hugs and support to all three of you

the raven

much love. the most important thing is that you're both committed to loving and supporting your son. and the next most important thing is that you're doing what's best for you and your life. i'm sorry that things didn't work out between you and neil, but i know you'll be okay.

Michelle Brun

So sad to hear. Wishing you all the best on your journeys ahead. 💜

Alice Schipper

Sending you all lots of love & support ♥️

Lou McField

In case you need something to cheer you up I have a story about kids who you indirectly made their day. So my mom is training to become a music therapist at the age of 58, and one of her new job experience was to come to a nursery for a week and see what she could bring in the education of the toddlers. When I came to see you at Köln 6 years ago, I kindly asked you to sign my mom's ukulele. And she always brings that uke for luck with her wherever she goes for her sessions. She let the toddlers play on several instruments including that Ukulele. But she was telling them they needed to be very careful because it is one signed by a singer. Of course they asked who and my mom said "it's Amanda Palmer" It became the favourite ukulele of all the nursery and every time the 2yr old wanted to play it they were asking / babling (imagine a French accent) "can I have Amana Amer guitar?" You of course have the big hugs of my dearly beloved mother who you have inspired to continue her music and help people being seen xx

Rebecca Weger

When I got divorced someone wished me condolulations. Perhaps that is useful to you or someone else reading this. Sending love and wishes for ease to all of you.

Arielle

Love and respect ❤️❤️❤️🫂

EmVT

I'm so sorry Amanda, sending you love and hugs. everything will be alright. 🌻🌻🌻

Rebecca Edwards

Sending love to all three of you. Be gentle with yourself in this transitional time

Jane Waterman

I am sorry, as I know this can't have been easy, but as long as you are both committed to loving your little man in cooperation, that's all that counts. Love to you all. <3

Raven

<3 <3 <3

Coila

Love to you. Something you cared to create and worked to build has taken a new direction. That usually starts with some pain, even if there’s none in any other part of the process… and it seems there is often plenty in other parts, too. Love to you and your family and the new shape it’s taking.

Elise Feldman

Sending you love and strength as you go through this transition.

Sally

I'm sorry Amanda. I wish you all smooth sailing.

Cate Whitehead

Dear Amanda. thank you for sharing this significant moment in your life and Neil's. All I can say is I love you very much and of course I know that you and Neil are committed to the well-being of your son Ash. xx Cate

Joanna Lindblad

I'm very sorry to hear this. Much love to both of you and Ash. Every path has its rough terrain but we keep going to live, to love, and to find happiness in this beautiful, difficult life <3 Much love and many hugs (((A)))

Skyeanna Malito

I wish you both luck and happiness in your future. My love and thoughts are with you.

Fee

Love you, Amanda 🖤

Tom Schmidt

Dear Amanda, firstly I am 99.999% sure that you will be wonderful partners in parenting Ash. You helped me through my rather bad break up a few years back. Seeing you in Offenbach was one of the last good things we did together and the openness of the show, the raw emotions brought us closer to realising that it was over. It still was a long, hard fight afterwards. I am in a good place now and you helped me along this ride. And yes, especially The Ride. I wish I could give you back a little of the power you gave me. Lots of love, Tom

Issa Rodri

best of luck to you and Ash, Amanda. keep on. 💕

Sandra Marek

Sending you and your family all the love. 💜

Lena DeGloma

Sending so much love. I feel for how difficult this is as a parent of a similar age kid and wishing that this leads to a new better chapter for your family’s life. 💜💜💜

AnaMarija Abramovic

Sending all three of you hugs for days. It's always a difficult decision, and I know you will make it work ❤️

Kris Smerick

Gah I’m sorry. “It’s not like grief but it’s grief.” I’ve walked this road. My heart goes with you. With Ash as the center, it will be ok. I pray that is everyone’s focus.

Kevin Darling

You didn’t owe us any explanation but I’m grateful for your openness. Love to all of you.

MPB

Sending you peace and love as you enter into this next chapter. I got divorced 3 years ago and it was very difficult, not surprisingly, but I am now the happiest I've ever been.

Steve Platt

<3 to you both. A story: I was at a party hosted by my friends L and E. I met a person LU and we started chatting. We hit it off quickly. I asked him what is relationship was to the hosts, and he replied, "I was E's first husband." He followed up, "When we got married, it was the right thing to do. When we got divorced, it was the right thing to do." A few years later, when my wife and I decided that we had headed in different directions and it was time to dissolve our marriage, I took LU's words to heart. They are words of truth, and they were true for my (then-)wife and I. We made two critical divorce strategy decisions: (a) keep it easy on the kids (respecting them and their spaces, prioritizing their needs), and (b) not spend a ton of money on lawyers. We succeeded at both. My ex and I still get along. We see each other at various social events. We have moved on without animosity. Our kids are healthier. We are healthier. It sounds like you and Neil are following this path. People change, people move along, and if they respect and accept this, they can build a better place for all they have created (Ash). Ash will see that caring transcents legalized living arrangements. Ash will see that adults can behave like adults, he will benefit. And I will gladly chat offline if you wish. -Steve

Jen Beeeee

One of the hardest of the hardest days. I embrace you all as one who has walked in similar shoes. Keeping focus on Ash is the goal, but never let your guard down. I love you. ❤️

Keiran Lancaster

I wish to express my support and admiration for you both.

Jen

Much love and light to you all ❤️❤️❤️

M. Cerys Jenks

Sad to hear, but I admire that you waited until you'd had time back together in your home to decide, rather than shattering apart from opposite sides of the world. And it's a joy to hear that two of my favorite internet art people are still on the same team, even if their positions are changing.

Fenstar

Sending you all the love. Go gently with your heart x

Roger VanDyke

I am sure this is a trying time for all of you, I send good thoughts your way. Thank-you for sharing. Life is difficult some of the time, relationships are hard work. Be well and do your best.

Rexington Funk

I'm so sorry youre going thru so much lately. I wish I could take some heaviness off your heart. This must be so incredibly hard. I hope the patreon can hold you like you need if possible.

Marie

Respect you shall have. You guys get to set the boundaries of privacy, not a needy audience. Thank you for sharing what you want to when you can.

Robert Hays

Having been through one, I'm sorry and not sorry all at once. Good luck, I hope you find happiness

holly

sending you lots of love. ♥️

DoodleHeart

Much love, strength and privacy and compassion for you. I'm sorry if you felt forced to make a statement. I hope we can be here for you when you need us.

Grace Beaster

Dear Amanda, holding you in my heart (it can be very quiet there). Wishing you peace and all the privacy in the world. Aroha nui.

Andy Leeke

Hugs to you all. It will absolutely all be ok.

Jule Axmann

I'm sorry for the pain you're going through and wish you all the best. after the father of my son and I broke up, I was so devastated - it was the most painful thing. BUT after some years of keeping on fighting for a good relation with him for the sake of our son know we are the bestest of friends. turned out to be a good thing the kid chained us together. Whatever happens - it won't stay as painful as it might be right now. lots of love to you!

Brianna Ace-Dodge

So much love and strength to you all as you navigate these waters. My marriage is ending too, we have a 6 year old. Hugs 🫂

Fanny von B

Sending love to you both and Ash. The end of a love is a difficult thing, but sometimes separating is the kindest thing you can do. 💜

Zomino

I love you

ALFRED STUDWELL

:^( - Sorry to hear this news. I have been curious. Thanks for including us.

Marisa

Shit now I'm even more glad I got to hug you last night. Sending another squeeze of love and empathy your way.

Viktoria Nikolova

Love for you three. It will e all right, and weird, and bumpy, but you are amazing human beings. You will manage to keep him whole. Sending strength your way! ❤️

Julie Gillen

You didn’t need to share but thank you for openness and honesty. Thank you for allowing us to be there, as removed as we are, and I hope you feel supported by your community in all its forms. Look after yourself, take your time, do what you can and want. Your work and honesty has had such an immeasurable impact on me, both as an artist and personally, and I know there are countless others who feel the same. You give so much, don’t be afraid to ask….fuck I just realised the comic irony of that but that’s your fucking impact! I’ll shut up now, but thank you and I see you ❤️

Marissa

It's a difficult decision to make, but it's often the best for all involved. Myself, my ex, and our son are all so much healthier, emotionally, since we parted. And we still do things together, we're still family. Wishing you love. Sending you hugs.

Michelle Turner

Love to you, Amanda. I hope you didn't feel pressured into sharing this by the demands of others to know your business. Ash has two great parents, and I know you'll put him first always.

Corinne

I love you. As a 26 year old divorcée, god do I feel your pain and heartache. Take time to heal your own heart. Spend your time worrying about yourself and your son and loving yourself more than anyone else ever could. Forget the rest. I love you. You are real and you are seen.

Tiffany Schaefer

So much has changed and so much will keep changing. I hope you’re surrounded by all of our love as you navigate this.

Cathleen Falsani

Sending love, peace, and grace to all three of you.

Howard Scherr

Holding your whole family in my heart tonight. ❤️

Tammi L

Much love to you, Amanda. I don't know whether you need condolences or congratulations, but I will say when I decided to divorce, I needed both. So I'm sorry, and I'm glad for you. If I could give one piece of divorce advice, I will tell you what my therapist told me at the time: "YOU get to write the story of your divorce. It doesn't have to be like anyone else's." That's what we did — we wrote a story of continued love and respect, shared holidays and vacations, and a united front when facing down the kids (who WILL play you against each other in a divorce, because that's completely normal). My divorce was the best thing I ever did for myself and my kids.

Paul Willett

I love all of you - sometimes things just suck and everyone involved just has to keep moving and breathing. As Frost said, “The only way out is through.” Sending peaceful thoughts, virtual hugs, and all of the karma points I can spare. ❤️

Erin Mannion

Sending you so much love in a long, ongoing process of trying times after trying times after trying times. 💙 & if you need a hide away/open space, there's a big country home with 144 acres of land in middle of nowhere WNY where you & any of your loved ones are always welcome.

Riley

I love you, and my heart hurts for you. I am also happy for you, and proud. Know that you are loved and that we’ve got you. ❤️

Amym7655

I've always respected the hell out of how you put it all out there for the world to share. And I respect the hell out of you keeping things private for your kid. 🖤

Tom Steiger

Life is performed daily without a net. Don’t worry; we’ll catch you.

Val Meade

Oh love. May you both see this transition with love and grace. Give Ash an extra squoosh from me.

Emma Redstone

Fuck life is hard. But, there we are. We live, we breathe, life goes on, and we survive. If we, and those we love, can thrive, then we are all doing as we should as humans. Sending love x x x

Maria

Sending you love ❤️

Lisa Marie Fuqua

Sending love as you navigate the best paths for each of you to walk in a form of respectful love. Co-parenting is beautiful and fun and not without its moments of total joy but it can also be maddening. I know you guys are starting from a place of love for Ash and that is absolutely the most important thing. All love and magic go with you.

Christi F

Much love to all of you.

Llaura Sanacore Rubin

It's about time. No, it's sad, but y'all gotta do you. Ash knows he is loved. You'll probably get along a lot better once those divorce papers are signed. My brother and my ex sister-in-law have been divorced for around 30 years now and they get along better now than they ever did when they were married. Sending Healing Vibes and Love from New Jersey. 💜🔥💜🔥💜

Jen G

Love & space to you as you move to the next version of family together and appart.

Jill Fuller

Love to you and your family, Amanda.

Helen Jones

I went through a divorce 10 years ago. It’s like dealing with a death but most of the time I felt like dealing with a death would’ve been easier because then I’d truly know and understand what happened. I’m only just now able to listen to the music again that got me through it all. The entire process is just…a lot.

Ari Jensen

I haven't posted before. Just sending you all love. Togetherness has seasons. Love holds.

Robert Williams

I’m doing my own little tour around Oz (finally) and catching up with my sister, son, family & friends. I’ve also visited my parents graves for the first time in 20 years. My dad use to say this little poem a lot, really, a lot, so I made a little plaque to leave on his grave, not for him (he’s not there) but for me. I think it’s appropriate here - Life is mainly froth and bubble, two things stand like stone. Kindness in another’s trouble, courage in your own. Adam Lindsay Gordon. Love to you three ❤️

Alan Wilder

Dear Amanda, I am going through the same process after almost 30 years of marriage. Stay strong. It will all work out for the best. Much love. Julian xx

Jerry Peckery

So sad but I think we felt it coming. The pandemic ruined so much for so many. I know i will never be the same. Good Luck to all of you. NJ too

Laura Morland

Dear Amanda, Your closest followers have known for a *long* time that your marriage (but not your co-parenting relationship) was over in all hut name... even though you both tried your best to make it work. I hope that a lot of your grief is behind you already, but still it must hurt, to publish this announcement. Sending you big hugs from Berkeley.

April Weiss

Even when you know it’s the right decision, it’s still… a lot. Sending all the love and support as you embark on this new chapter. 💚

Caitlin Brown

Damn I hope this announcement was just oddly funny timing and not prompted by a comment complaining you don't share enough... or maybe that comment lit a fire under your ass you knew you needed... either way, guess what, it's none of my business :). I know you're doing the best you can, at least the baby didn't die, and I look forward to any and all future art you produce <3

Stephie

🖤❤️

Tammi L

I had the same thought about the timing. 😬 It made me sad and angry.

WJ Parker

I’m sorry Amanda - but I think you and Neil are amazing humans, and hope this next chapter goes as good as possible for all three of you. Hugs from Oregon. ♥️

Tammi L

"Ash will see that caring transcents legalized living arrangements. Ash will see that adults can behave like adults, he will benefit." Proudest divorce-related moment for me: When my daughter told me that she had told a teacher she didn't have her homework because she forgot it at her dad's house, and the teacher said "Your parents are divorced?" If they can't tell at parent-teacher conferences, you're doing it right!

Cassandra Bunk

My heart is broken for you and Ash. Im sending you all my love. I think these upcoming doll shows will be very cathartic..

Korinna Marks

Hardest best decision of my life for me and my son. Sending you so much love and new chapter energy as you all evolve.

Kerrie Chapman

Relationships change, and I hope that the decision to share so publicly was not prompted by social media presence. As a long term fan of both of your art - much love 💜

Auryn

Love y'all. 🖤🎡

Spencer Levine

Thank you for the simple joint statement. After the fiasco of comments in the last update I can only express that minimal explanation is what's best right now and the majority of the Patreon will understand if you do or don't go into detail about it. My heart is with you and your family.

Sean Dennison

There’s not much to say but I’m sorry. It’s a deep hurt and grief. Your community/ies love you. That doesn’t change. Ash is held in our love too. I appreciate your discretion and how that is a gift to him.

Karen Jarboe

Hey Lady! 100% support you and Neil and Ash. Gotta do what's best for all parties! Doing this myself. It was super scary and way more difficult than I imagined, but is so worth it in the long when you realize things no longer work and you can bloom into a new flower (maybe after lots of composting lol). I'm sure you know all this. And healthy co-parenting totally exists!

Hilda Gertze

Holding all of you in love and light

Adelheid

My first husband and I separated when our son was 9 years old. After the initial shock, our son later told us that he was glad we did it. He said we argued less and were better parents after we split. Now, a decade later, my first husband and I are both happy in our new lives - and we both look back on our past with joy and no anger. Divorce is such a loaded word, and yet can simply be the official finale to one good thing that allows the next good thing to happen, for everyone concerned. I wish you all the best!

Debz michaela

The pain is hopefully transitory, I hope for me too (my relationship just ended). Sending all 3 of you so much love 💜

Rosie Reast

Sending much love and compassion. As I busy working mum in the UK I understand how difficult it is managing life events while parenting. From what you've generously shared (everything you share is a gift to your community) you've had some seriously disruptive life events in the last few years. When you do share I think it's a bit like the connection you made with people while a 8ft bride (might've got height wrong). Only instead of you providing comfort and recognition to a passer by giving them a flower and having a connection of "I see you." Now its us who see and accept you. Personally I feel grateful that I have played a small part in supporting you, giving you space to parent, make art and heal.

Edith Solarski

Amanda, i‘m very sorry. I hope you are ok. Also in regard to the discussion before. I‘ve been a patron and been following you for a few years. The thing is: i appreciate you for just being you/not even being fully you but being honest and open about it. Your messy crazy upside down life is also my life. I hug you. You trying holding everything together and struggling to do so is also me. I love you. We all try. It’s ok. We‘re ok. Many times we‘re not. But even that’s ok.

Elizabeth Hickey

I hope you didn’t feel compelled to share this after the disappointed patron post… I listened to the entirety of Piano Is Evil today and I felt so inspired by it and connected to you. I want you to know that. You’ve told us how hard the last few years have been for you but I want you to know I still feel as connected to you through your music as I did when I first discovered it many, many years ago. Even though so much of your life and our lives and the world has changed, what your music does for me hasn’t changed. I used to blare tracks from Theater is Evil on my headphones during some of my darkest times and those songs are so important to me. And this probably seems like an irrelevant rant but I’m writing to say that in the face of divorce and overwhelm and sadness, your music - the thing that got you to this place - transcends. So if nothing else, the initial artistic goal of emotionally connecting with people through music has been achieved, time and time again. Please don’t forget that. That’s what brought many of us to the Patreon anyway. The music, you gave us a connection through the music and that can’t be taken away.

Zoltanina

I'm sorry you can't just have a divorce without having to think about what to say to all the people on the internet. But still thank you for telling us. Panta rhei... We're sending you strength ♥️

Magdalene Blue

Divorce sucks but the new adventures that await you both are so worth it. And co-parenting can be amazing under one roof or two. Sending you lots of love and hope.

Jo Swift

Much love to you all❤️

Hannah Schumacher

A note of encouragement from a child who is glad to have happily divorced parents: It is going to be okay and ending a marriage can save a friendship that got off-track. You probably know that already. I love you both and wish you all and Ash the best in this next step in your relationship. Keep the love alive, sending you all the best thoughts.

T Nonya

Oh Amanda. I feel you. From one divorcee to another- to quote Sarah Slean's self titled song, "Sarah"... "This is not the end/You will be loved again" (I recommend listening to it has one not in times of relationship upheaval for healing). You are loved. Be well ❤️‍🩹

Philipp Windgassen

Hi Amanda, just wanted to say that you, Ash, and Neil are wonderful people and regardless of the legal construct, there will always be love between the three of you!

Ang Lingard

We love you all. I don't like that it has to be public, but thank you. Keep asking for help and support. We love you x

Ofel Epicorus

Take care of you and your family, Amanda. I appreciate you clarifying things for us, but we are not entitled to know anything about your life. Whatever you want to share, we should just be happy to listen. Go easy. Go well. I am sending hugs and hope you feel loved.

Katja van den Doel

I'm sad to hear this. Marriage usually starts with love, divorce always starts with sadness. But I'm convinced both can end in long term happiness. Just wishing the three of you all that happiness, somewhere in the near future preferably. For now big virtual hug for those who want them.

Cyn

This made me cry. I am so saddened by the loss of your marriage. I know you will both co-parent your son with love and respect for each other. But damn. I really had such hope. With great respect for how you have both handled this parting, I wish you both well, and the ability to continue to co-parent your son with love and respect. Blessed be.

Jean-Bernard W

Feel free, if you come to France at any point, to drop by my place. I'll offer tea, coffe, beer, a blanket, a kid free afternoon so you can go out and shop, create, think, drink, cry, laugh. You cyultivated the art of asking, it inspired me the art of offering. I'll offer. You don't need to ask.

Jeffrey

Dear Amanda-in-Woodstock. You have now exhaled, after holding your breath (and Neil’s, and ours) for so long. We, your friends and patrons, sensed this was coming, but still, we did not speak its name, for to do so would make it too real and to cause it to ripen and shed its skin before its time was due. And so you wrote a long post a couple of days ago outpouring your soul while leaving the spirits and shadows of yesterday’s postings by you and Neil behind a veil. Now that veil has been lowered and you, Neil and Ash can begin the long road to the Next Part of Your Lives. I sense this will be hardest for you for many reasons that you know even better than we do. Thank god you are strong in so many ways. You have told us, your community, how important we are to you so many times. Thank you for those affirmations, and I know you will need us more than ever. For this to happen the weekend before the Dresden Dolls pour forth their/your music gives those shows and songs a kind of gravitas that none of us (or you?) could have imagined last week. You have a good imagination, so you must have known this was going to happen in this very moment. Now you must use the power you have unleashed upon yourself to shout your messages out into the winds of real life with three shows. I hope you stream it while you scream it, but even if you were just to play those songs without an audience, we, your friends and patrons, will hear them somehow. Your heart and soul travels over the powerful bridge you have built for us all, a bridge woven by thousands of patron-threads. I’m proud to be one single strand of our fragile and unbreakable chain. We are here for you because you willed all this to happen and worked so hard to bind us all together. Now we will hold you and Ash safe as best we can, and I know our power is simply to be here, connected by all our fragile hearts and spirits. It has helped me to write this since my life is in turmoil too, and that is how it always is for all of us, whether we sing about it or simply live with our bashing waves inside us. Now that you have exhaled at last, you next breath begins and we are gently listening to the wind.

Katja

I wish love and happiness, healing and friendship to all of you.

Jo VanEvery

I like how Katja worded this do I’m just going to second her sentiments

Lynn Robinson

Hugging you all. Very sad news . As other patrons have written - we all sensed this was coming. Feel the love and support from us all ❤️

Isa

Love for you all. You‘ll get through this.

The New American Dream Radio Show

I'm so sorry to hear that, but I know you will all be fine. There is incredible strength in each one of you, perhaps so much that it can't fit into a life together. My prayers are with you.

Michael Hargreave Mawson

Sending love to all three of you. May your lives be filled with much happiness.

Jeanette-o-saur

Love you all. I'm sorry you had to make such a difficult choice. Ash couldn't have two more loving parents. Hugs

Toby

Divorce is tough. I’ve been there. It is possible, over time, to see your ex as a different kind of family. My cousin modelled for me a divorce where both parents were together for birthdays and special events and I followed her lead. It took time, and therapy, to get over my expectation that marriage is forever and there are times I still long for what could have been. I’m sending you strength. I have no doubt you will find the compassion to raise Ash together.

Rebecca Ryan

Hey A, lots of love to you all.. Our next chapters are evolving…and have been for a long time. I feel. It’s…just our life story. I’m going through the same right now after 25 years.. We will all be ok, and more than that 💜 🥰

Andrew Miller

Human relationships are complex and private, I love you both, and will continue to do so.

Rhiannon

Sad news. All the best wishes to you all.

James Moran

Big love to all of you, so sorry to hear this. Hope you all get the privacy and space you need.

Tamara

Amanda, I think it really comes through that the parents want to center Ash in their lives. Sending you all love and healing. ♥️

Mx Afon

You got this Amanda, and we got you xxx

Katie Roberts Art

So sorry you are going through this and I genuinely hope you did not feel pressured (esp by your people here) to put this out. We all love you <3 Xx

Wordsmith Lynn

Being in the public eye has put your relationship under an even sharper microscope than everyone else’s relationships these last three years. And it’s been an exhausting three years for relationships for everyone I know. I’m sorry you couldn’t find a way to stay together, but hope you’re able to remain on friendly terms. I’m also sorry if you’ve felt pressured to issue this statement because of fans who demand to know about every aspect of your personal life. Love to you both, you’re both great artists and great parents.

Hunca Munca

I'm so sorry to hear this Amanda. Peace, love, and healing. Everything will be okay I'm reminded of a moment that was really special to me, at a concert in Hobart back in 2015 you and Neil sang Perfect Day by Lou Reed together. It was such a beautiful experience. You were pregnant at the time and we didn't know yet. You two came together for such a beautiful moment in time, and some things aren't meant to be forever, but that doesn't mean they weren't meaningful and important. I'm grateful to have been able to take a glimpse into that beautiful little pocket of time p.s I found footage of that performance and it's exactly as I remembered. You looked like a gorgeous iridescent beetle! knowing little Ash is in there just makes this even more darling https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6cpGsKkbHTk

Mara Wüstenberg

Although this did not come as a surprise (it was quite clear that you are not together anymore) I'm still so sad. It's just so tough. But I'm sure you will be doing ok and you both find a good way with each other and will lovingly care for Ash. I wish all 3 of you all the best from my heart.

Mareile

I‘m very sorry, Amanda. Life can be so messy sometimes :( Sending love and hugs.

Gail Gallagher

Love and support to you, Neil & Ash 💕

Mandy Mountain

Hugs and love to you! 🤗😘🖤🖤🖤

Teresa Toro

Amanda, I know there has been a long process behind this announcement, and the pain isn't nearly over. I am sending all my love and strength to you, Ash, and Neil, as well as your families who will also experience this transition with you. I was married for seven years, and it became clear after only a few that we had made a misstep in marrying. We loved each other and were the best of friends – but those aren't enough, always, nor necessarily the only reasons to marry someone. We divorced, and almost immediately I met my current partner (now officially my spouse). We have been together 20 years. I am deeply grateful for that first marriage, because if I hadn't experienced it I wouldn't have learned how to recognize the right partner for me. And how to be a better partner, myself. How to be truly constructive in the relationship instead of assuming it was a self-cleaning oven (was *that* a mistake we both made!). How to find a better balance between us. Your life is of course your life; I am *not* saying "hey there's other fish in the sea, Amanda!" (good grief!) – but I *am* saying that as a self-aware, intensely sensitive person, you too will take lessons and revelations learned from this marriage, and grow from them. They will be there to draw from whenever you need them. You may even find some gratitude, some day, for the gifts hidden amongst the wounds. They are there, I promise – speaking from painful experience. Take care of Ash, take care of yourself, and let everything else fall into place. I love you.

Teresa Toro

Kate Bush's Love and Anger was my divorce anthem back then. I played it daily for a good while. It lay buried here, it lay deep inside me It's so deep I don't think that I can speak about it It could take me all of my life But it would only take a moment to Tell you what I'm feeling But I don't know if I'm ready yet You come walking into this room Like you're walking into my arms What would I do without you? Take away the love and the anger And a little piece of hope holding us together Looking for a moment that'll never happen Living in the gap between past and future Take away the stone and the timber And a little piece of rope won't hold it together If you can't tell your sister If you can't tell a priest 'Cause it's so deep you don't think that you can speak about it To anyone Can you tell it to your heart? Can you find it in your heart To let go of these feelings Like a bell to a Southerly wind? We could be like two strings beating Speaking in sympathy What would we do without you? Two strings speak in sympathy Take away the love and the anger And a little piece of hope holding us together Looking for a moment that'll never happen Living in the gap between past and future Take away the stone and the timber And a little piece of rope won't hold it together We're building a house of the future together (What would we do without you?) Well, if it's so deep you don't think that you can speak about it Just remember to reach out and touch the past and the future Well, if it's so deep you don't think you can speak about it Don't ever think that you can't change the past and the future You might not, not think so now But just you wait and see, someone will come to help you (Mmm yeah)

Jess W

Sending love and good luck your way. I know there's nothing I can do, but for what it's worth, I'll still be here believing in you.

Amber Dawn

Love and hugs ❤️

Deborah Beale

I feel for you, Amanda, I think of you xxxxxx

Kathryn Drew

Oof... darling heart, all my love to you. May your heart be held and nurtured as you take your next brave steps.i love you and send a massive long full bodied bear hug across the ocean to you x x x

TMR Bennett

My love goes out to you Amanda. I know this will be a remarkably difficult time and we are here for whatever. My partner and I are currently figuring out a divorce after they decided to leave approximately a week ago, so I feel this at a very fundamental and painful level.

amandapalmer

jeffrey, this comment made me cry. out loud. i can’t remember the last time that has happened. thank you. for your heart and words. thank you. x

DebbieG

I am sorry to hear this. My parents divorced when I was 13, so I was older than Ash is, but I believe he will be ok. I knew that my parents were better off apart, and it made them able to focus more on me instead of battling each other. I hope that is the same for you. Hugs and strength to all of you.

Jana Stehlikova

Love to all three of you. You and Neil are my favourite artists, together or apart ❤️

Nicole Werner

We all love you. I’m crying because my own divorce was all too recent. Can’t wait to meet you, hug you, cry with you, whatever comes during this upcoming magic in Woodstock. I know I got into yoga…but were brunch RSVP’s confirmed yet? I have my Airbnb the whole time…hoping. You know how to handle this situation deep down and AFP will always prevail.

Peter Menzl

Thats the way live is. Nothing that is made by mankind is for eternal. Only Love and Respect are the pillars, they keep us protected from the bad side of life.

Betsy Cacchione

Love and support to all of you in a difficult time. I wish for you all ease and joy in co-parenting that beautiful boy. Hugs un-ending.

Anne Morgyn

I ventured through the weeds on the same journey this year with kids in tow. I know it’s gets better. I’ll meet you in the incredible light of release and freedom on the other side. Until then just keep breathing and loving on that amazing boy. So much love to you all.

Yvette Perez

I'm sorry, I know first-hand the upheaval of divorce (both ad a child of one and later a partner in one...) But it will ultimately get better, if you let it. Sending much love to you, Neil, and Ash. And wishing you all nothing but positive growth as you move forward. Xo.

Anayte Delahay

I’ve been on both ends as many here have. I’m sorry, and I also sincerely, gently want to congratulate you for being able to make that extremely tough decision. You did it, and the difficult road to healing can begin. Much love to you all.

Dorit

Sending all three of you love and strength

Catherine Hannah

Being truthful about the hurtful parts when Ash asks will help - he knows the waters you've been sailing and feels the change of wind like a goose walking over one's grave: the catch of breath, the hairs raise on one's neck. Honesty will help him with the issues of self-doubt he will take on. (Divorced parent, here) All the love and support to all three, and everyone supporting your galaxy 🥰🥰🥰

Elaine

I remember the whole thrilling twitter thing when y’all got together and the wedding without a honeymoon. I loved and admired your and Neil’s ability to manage a relationship despite distance and busy careers. It is like having interesting neighbors. I like the co-parenting decision. Another friend has been doing it for a couple years and it seems to be working well. Not a simple practice. All the best for you and Neil as you work together for Ash. 💗

Anna Haasler

You've got this. Lots of love.

Mitch Parks

My heart goes out to all three of you.

Dina Lindemann

I know that even decisions that are exactly the right thing for everyone involved can be difficult and heart rending so my heart goes out to all three of you. Sending love and light to you as you navigate this next chapter.

BoredDinobot

Love you all, and am so happy that Ash has parents like you. Bright blessings and all the hugs to you.

Petra Miliankos

Chiming in with my very own contribution to the great big pillow fort love pile we're all creating for you to fall on into. Much, much love to all three of you x

Nicole Prehoda

I'm so sorry. Being a fan of both of you, in my mind so different and so similar...I was enchanted by what very little I could glean of your relationship. And I endlessly respected your efforts to keep things private---and laughed (kindly) at the imagined the effort required to keep Amanda (share everything) quiet. But then I imagined that everyone requires some things kept private and I love that you worked it out. I love that you both get to love Ash and you will create the best for him. Yet, I wanted even more for you two and am sad. This too shall pass. You must have gratitude for what you have and forgiveness for what you don't. I have a failed marriage. Few things affect me more deeply. Again, my deepest condolences and wishes for much happiness for all three of you.

Simone Bueno

I am very sorry, I know how hard it is to co-parent. Sending much love and strength. Hugs

Zarich Catlin-Hallett

I was really saddened to read this. Not as some sort of weird judgement thing, I just felt sad *for* you both. It can be so hard to unbuild a relationship. Painful and profoundly difficult. It feels natural to build a life with someone you love. But doing the reverse is like pulling stitches out of your skin, heart, soul. Even when it’s the right thing to do it’s never easy or wanted. I hope you are finding joy in small things, and that joy in bigger things will come when you’re ready. Loads of love. Zx

Annmarie Sloane

Healing love to you all. Here’s to future days 💜🤗💜

Barbarella

Just keep swimming. It's going to be okay. <3