In the Wake of Sinéad: The Last Day of Our Acquaintance {official Thing} (Patreon)

Hello Loves.

I'm reading and responding to comments tonight and tomorrow....please say hi down there, and let us know what you think of the track.

{{AND, QUICK - For the local Dresden Dolls fans coming to Woodstock, NY, for the sold-out shows @ Colony Aug 31-Sept 2...there's an entire guide with things to do + a Massive Smörgåsbord of side shows/gatherings at Graveside Variety, our little clubhouse piano cabaret purpose-built for this community (and funded by patrons)! Starting tomorrow (Aug 30th) - my choreographer friend Coco Karol is leading a movement class at 4-5:30pm, and John Coons is kicking us off at 9pm with first of four performances of their super-queer, super-dark musical, "Bleak!" All tickets/info here. Come be with your people!!}}

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NOW...I've been talking about it all month, and today is the day we put it out.

You can play the song directly through this post.  $3 patrons, watch your inboxes for a direct download link, it's coming in a moment.

PLEASE ENJOY THE TRACK (with headphones if you can) and SHARE THIS POST, or share the song any way you know how.....the track is now up on:

Youtube
Spotify
Apple music
or
Bandcamp 

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A portion of the money from this post is going to be donated to The Irish Women's Survivor Support Network.

Sinéad survived. Until she didn't. I survived - and am still surviving - the ricochet of pain that is left in the wake of sexual assaults, sexual abuses of power, and the long, complicated web of agony that is created by sexual violence in general. I have watched at close range (and have digested heard thousands of stories from others at this point) what sexual violence, and the lack of accountability and truth, can do to rip apart families, lives and livelihoods. Sinéad knew all this, and she sang truth to power over and over again. She pointed her finger. She demanded accountability, justice. I don't think she got it. We still have so much work to do, people. If you'd like to donate on top, please do, at:

https://iwssn.org.uk

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I am so proud of this release and how quickly me, Jherek Bischoff, and The Righteous Babes put this together to pay tribute to this woman's songwriting. The cover artwork is as powerful as the recording itself, and I'm so honored that Niki McQueen took my call and made the cover art with only a few days' notice.

None of this would have been able to happen, as usual, without patronage. We had the money, we had your faith, and we just hit the recording studio, spent the money, and made the thing our hearts wanted to make.

I first heard this song and the gorgeous album it lived on, "I Do Not Want What I Haven't Got" - when I was fourteen, and it all changed my life. I never would have thought that I'd be recording it at 47 for a community of people like you.

Feeling so much camaraderie,

Music is like nothing else.

It threads together time, space, loss; it helps me make sense of the world.

I've done so many of these fast-covers with Jherek. When Bowie died, we put out this whole collection of covers in the weeks following. When Dolores Riordon of the Cranberries died, we put out this version of Zombie. When Prince died, we put this out.

Every time I do this exercise with Jherek, I always have to quietly pray that it isn't seen as opportunistic. Money, art, time...you know I spend a lot of time thinking about it. But every time we lose an artist we love - who has influenced us deeply - it's like our little musician-version of a wake. This is how we process, how we grieve.

The day Sinéad died, I was driving from the Hudson Valley to Boston to do some heavy duty cleaning and dealing with old artifacts in my old Cloud Club apartment (which is still there, with other people in and out of it). My fella from Boston had been out to my place in Woodstock for a visit. He was driving back to Boston too, in his own car, about an hour behind me. He was heading to his dad's house.

I got a call while I was driving. Someone told me that Sinéad was gone.

I pulled over to a gas station. I called my fella. He knows me, he knows her, he knows us. Hew knew everything. He was right behind me. He told me he'd meet me in the parking lot.

I sat there in the car and I couldn't quite cry.

I thought about Sinéad, how horrible the world had been to her. I thought about her mental health struggles, so many of which had been aired in the public, I thought about her desperate cries through twitter for company and help. About her son committing suicide. About the immensity of her talent. About how now everyone would sing hger praises, because it's so much safer to praise the dead icon than the living, complicated breathing human-being artist.

I thought about what the music industry did to her. The media. The world.

And then I did what I always do, when I'm trying to process a difficult feeling. 

I read through a few of the immediate obituaries, and I felt sad, and angry, becausew they weren't getting it right. And I decided to just....write.

I wrote this rage-elegy, and posted it to Facebook (and crossposted it everywhere else).

It began:

If I were a different kind of person I would let it settle and wait a few days to collect my thoughts and do this the right and grown-up way but I think she’d be more proud of me for writing like this….pulled off to the side of the highway writing from my fucking heart because that’s she did, all her life, made from the heart...

(you can read the rest here: https://www.facebook.com/amandapalmer/posts/pfbid0NRhCMjZsVjD5FceCwyQYJivWrANfMoPVxb4aXpoSWHjq3ZkwAiGPh6g3bykGgiQrl)

(photo by Robbie Jones)

It went viral after I posted it. 

It's been seen almost 3.5 million times on Facebook.

Sometimes urgency just fucking works, because that's where the truth sits.

I feel the same way about music. The faster the better, sometimes.

That's why I wanted to make this cover quickly.

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When he pulled up to the parking lot, where I was sitting waiting in my car, I was in the middle of writing this. I didn't see him pull up, and he watched me write from his own drivers' seat.

After ten minutes, I looked up and saw him there.

After I hopped out of my car and into his, he did an impression of what I'd looked like  - to him, from his car - while I was writing my rage-piece. The windows in my car were up, and it was 90 degrees that day. I had turned the engine off and was just baking in this hundred and ten degree car-sauna. My body was covered in sweat; completely wet.

He scrunched up his face and clutched his phone and clenched his jaw and gritted his teeth and started muttering to himself, taking deep gasping breaths, with his brow knitted furrowed so far it into itself that it looked like he was about to explode.

"That's what you looked like through the window."

I knew he was right. I'd felt it.

I sat in his passenger seat, and read him what I'd written, aloud. We were quiet.

Then he said:

"Listen".

And he queued up a Sinéad song I'd never heard. This one: "In This Heart", from Universal Mother.

We sat there in his car, with the volume up load, windows rolled up, trees in front of us, sky blue. Oh god.

We sat there, wordlessly, listening to her voice.

It was so impossible to think that the person who sang this song was never going to sing a song again.

I put my head on his chest.

That's when the tears came. I wept. That voice.

I am waiting for you
For only to adore you
My heart is for you
My love
My love
My love

This is my grief for you
For only the loss of you
The hurting of you
My love
My love
My love

Her voice filled up the car, filled up my head, filled up my heart, filled up the whole world. Her voice that nobody will hear again, singing live. Her voice that came into my head when I was a little girl and taught me how to sing unapologetically. With so much conviction. With so much heart.

With so much honesty.

That moment in the parking lot is one of the truest, most beautiful moments I've ever felt in my life. To feel so connected to a moment, to a person, to a dead person, to my past self - through art. Through sound.

This is what music can do.

This is everything.

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So I hauled my sorry ass back to Boston to confront my own past, and fate would have it that the very cassette tape I'd referenced in my little obituary was still on the dusty shelf of my old art joint, with all my old Prince and Cure and Depeche Mode and Pixies tapes, Xerox cover art and all.

I had listened back to the album - the entirety of "I Do Not Want What I Haven't Got" - in the car.

I had listened to "The Last Day of Our Acquaintance".

FUCK. This song. This is the song, Amanda.

I know you all know what's going on in my life, more of less.

This song spoke right to the core of me.

I texted Jherek that night, from the heat of my apartment.

He'd been one of the first people I'd reached out to when I gotten the news that she'd died (along with Alina Simone, one of my oldest friends from High School, who worshipped at the Sinéad altar more than any other musician I've ever met). I said "Are we doing it?" He said "Which song?" I said "The Last Day of Our Acquaintance".

He said

"You're on."

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A few days later, Jherek sent me a sketch of what he was going to record with the string quartet. It wasn't quite working for me, which surprised me. Jherek usually nails this on the first go. So he ditched the draft and went back to the drawing board, and sent me another midi-string sketch the night before the session he'd booked with the strings. It ... still wasn't working. The strings just weren't sounding....right. I called him, he's in Los Angeles.

"This is crazy. This never happens. But it's not what I was hearing. What do we do?"

He said "I don't know. We can cancel the session. But it's gonna cost two grand if we do, and we don't get it back."

I thought. It had to be right.

I said: "Here's the thing. It has to be NOTHING and then EVERYTHING. Maybe you can improv some stuff in the studio...and we can fix it in the mix. Have you ever heard the version of Another World, by Anohni, where it's just this long, drawn out, dissonant orchestra?"

"No..."

I sent it to him. I said: Do the session tomorrow. I'm praying for you. It'll work.

I think Jherek stayed up most of the night reworking the arrangement, and I spent the next day biting my nails, wondering how it was going. The next night, he sent it over.

It was perfect. He got it. He CRUSHED IT.

I listened to the strings in my car - again - while driving home from the grocery store, with tears streaming down my face.

I'm always crying in this story. But god, the tears nowadays are so much happier than they were a few years ago. Music is bringing me back to myself.

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I wrote to Niki McQueen that night - a fellow survivor and South African artist who's been slamming out incredible art for The Dresden Dolls, and asked if she'd be up for a SUPERFAST commission, paid for by patronage. She said yes. I described what I imagined: the ripping, the paper, the strength, the survival, and she got to work.

........

A handful of days later, I went into Applehead Studio in Woodstock to record the vocal, along with my last-minute back-up vocalists, who met me there about two hours after my session started.

My final take - the one that I did after the babes came into the control room - was the best one.

They know what's happening in my life. Having them there to do vocals was a coup, but having them there to be witness was even more important. My circle of safety.

I posted a little video of my conducting the babes HERE on Instagram.

.......

Here's some process photos and a little more about my collaborators on this one.

Can I say: THESE PEOPLE ARE SO GOOD, AND SO GAME.

What an incredible group of artists, who came together SO QUICKLY to make this fucker happen. My god.

First of all, the ARTWORK....created by South African artist Niki McQueen.

Me to Niki:

This reference figure popped up at me, and I suggested we have her ripping up a piece of paper, and dropping it, calmly....

This draft was the first version of what she finally drew...but the paper wasn't reading boldly enough against the background figure...

It took dozens of texts of back-and-forth but this is such a powerful final image - it took my breath away when she finally nailed it. Just like Jherek's arrangement. Sometimes it just WORKS.

This image says so much to me, and it could mean so many things.

I just love it.

Here's Niki's final physical drawing.

Some words from Niki about the process...

Hello Patrons...

The collaboration process with Amanda is often fast and furious and always hugely inspirational and satisfying. 

This one flowed very smoothly. Sinead and what she, her spirit, and her struggles meant to me, and her significant influence on my own life had been much on my mind since her passing. 

Amanda chose such a powerful song that finding a vision to speak to it came powerfully and quickly with her input. We went from idea to digital mockup to finished drawn and painted artwork in a couple of days. I hope this image speaks to both her strength and her vulnerability.

-Niki

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More about Niki....

Niki McQueen is a visual artist and communications and graphic design specialist from Cape Town, South Africa, with a background in Marine Biology. After obtaining her MSc, she changed careers and pursued work in web, graphic design, and communications.

As the COVID pandemic swept the globe, she felt compelled to create and rediscovered, developed and expanded on an old technique using hand-printing and mixed media that she first learned studying art at school.

Enamoured with the extraordinary, she draws inspiration from multiple sources, from vintage medical and scientific collections to surrealism and magical realism. She creates digital compositions using public domain images which are expertly and painstakingly hand-printed and drawn onto archival papers.

Her art explores the places beyond reason and the familiarity of everyday existence. Themes include anatomy, biology, psychology, archetypal interplay, eroticism, decay and rebirth. Every work tells a story, be it personal or magical – the viewer is invited to explore meaning in their own interpretation of the work.

Niki has struggled with worsening health over the past year. She is living with Long Covid, Fibromyalgia and other chronic illnesses, which have resulted in her being unable to work for an extended time, and facing challenges creating art. 

You can support her and buy beautiful prints of her work HERE:

https://nikimcqueen.com/

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THEN....there's 

The Righteous Babes.

This is a weird and beautiful collection of folks. I met Holly Miranda first, about a year ago when I moved back from New Zealand to Woodstock, and then our connection through Ani Difranco sealed the network. We're neighbors now, and spend a lot of time together. She's my good friend, she's seen me through a lot of pain this year. And vice versa.

The babes are an unlikely band made up of musicians and label-mates brought together Ani Difranco and her label, Righteous Babe - and they happened to be at my house, rehearsing for their upcoming tour in the Dolls Band Barn, when I decided to record this track. I asked them to do the back-up vocals and about 48 hours later, we rehearsed and they came into the studio with me.

From left to right: Holly Miranda, Gracie Coates, Jocleyn Mackenzie, and Rachel Ruggles (at Applehead studio in Woodstock, NY, recording back-up vocals):

Yours truly in the studio, singing my little heart out...

The whole crew outside the studio...photographed by Addy Vogt.

Here's a handful of photos of me and the babes doing a rocking LIVE version of the song, the day after we tracked it, at their show at Colony in Woodstock (they were SO GOOD).

(photos by Sam Margevicius)

And if you want to see the performance - we livestreamed it to Facebook, and it's still up to watch.....

https://www.facebook.com/amandapalmer/videos/604753948453718

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Some words from the Babes about what this cover means...

It was a true honor to be asked by Amanda to sing on this song by such an influential artist of our times, gone to soon. The pure power of having five women's voices screaming into the abyss was a viscerally cathartic experience that we hope resonates through the track. 

We love Sinéad, we love Amanda, we love each other, and we hope you love this rendition of Last Day of Our Acquaintance.

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More about the babes....

(photo by Anthony Mulcahy)

The Righteous Babes are a supergroup of powerhouse female artists, banded together under AniDiFranco's legacy label, Righteous Babe Records. Think boygenius meets Bonny Light Horseman with an air of Lilith Fair – currently the band is comprised of three independent groups: Gracie and Rachel (chamber-pop piano-violin duo who have appeared on NPR's Tiny Desk), Holly Miranda (sultry folk rock guitarist who has toured with Karen O), and Jocelyn Mackenzie (percussionist, electric ukulele player, and former member of Pearl and the Beard.)

The artists perform one another's original songs in fresh, unique arrangements that highlight technical prowess and deliver a stage show that is acrobatic and heart-pounding. Their distinctive vocal blend and powerful musicianship shine as they support one another as fellow artists who delight in sharing the stage, righteously.

THE RIGHTEOUS BABES:

www.therighteousbabes.com
Instagram / Facebook / Twitter

GRACIE AND RACHEL:

www.gracieandrachel.com
Instagram / Facebook / Twitter

HOLLY MIRANDA:

www.hollymiranda.com
Instagram / Facebook / Twitter

JOCELYN MACKENZIE:

www.jocelynmackenzie.com
Instagram / Facebook / Twitter

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And last but not least....

a little more about Jherek Bischoff...

(photo by Christian Faustus)

Like I said: he put this all together in UNDER A WEEK and got a KILLER quartet to record his arrangement live in Los Angeles.

Here's a note from Jherek about this song...

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Ahoy Amandaland!

It is always such a pleasure to collaborate with Amanda and all of you!

This song is another in a series of covers by Amanda and me celebrating heroes who've passed on. It has been an interesting and wild way to process these losses. When I heard Sinéad had passed, I knew immediately that we would make a cover. Amanda and I have never talked about Sinéad, but what she represented in my mind, I knew that Amanda must feel the same way. What inspires me about Sinéad is not only her incredible voice and powerful songs but also how truly punk she was.

Many writings circulated after her passing, and one that stuck out talked about her famous SNL performance. Regardless of whether or not you agreed she could get her point across by ripping up the picture of the pope, what she did was so PUNK.

Imagine being in her shoes: a rising star getting your big break on SNL performing for millions of people, deciding to perform a song a capella, and using this gigantic platform to bring awareness to the horrific things happening in the Catholic Church. She knew what it would mean for her career, yet she did it selflessly.

It's about the most punk thing I can imagine.

I listened to her music a lot in my late teens. I would close my eyes and imagine what it would feel like to sing like her. What it would feel like in my body, what it would feel like in my mind. It was such an intense superpower that she had. I am not a synesthete, but I always saw silver when I heard her voice. I looked up Silver on Wikipedia just now for kicks, and it says it's a conductor metal. She was undoubtedly a conduit.

This song was a hard one to arrange! The music is minimal, and there is so little going on. It's all about the words and the delivery. In my first couple of drafts, I created something true to the song but with a bit of my interpretation. I couldn't get it right, and we almost shelved the song. The evening before heading into the studio, I tried to make a version as stark and minimal as possible. It turned out even better than my first ideas and reminded me how much I love collaborating, especially with Amanda.

I want to thank Amanda, team AFP, and all of you patrons for allowing us to show love for our heroes.

Thank you to our wonderful string quartet and engineers.

Thank you to the Righteous Babes!

I hope you enjoy it.

Love, from hot as hell LA,

Jherek

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Jherek's Bio: Jherek Bischoff is an American composer, arranger, producer, and multi-instrumentalist. His credits include over a dozen albums as a solo artist or band member (The Dead Science, Parenthetical Girls, Xiu Xiu); over sixty albums as a musician, arranger, producer, or engineer (Kassa Overall, AngelOlsen, Regina Spektor); music for symphony orchestra, opera, film, theater, and ballet (Andersen's Stories, Organ Trail); and concert performances around the world (Carnegie Hall, Royal Albert Hall, Glastonbury Festival).

https://www.jherekbischoff.com/

https://www.patreon.com/jherekbischoff

Instagram / Facebook / Twitter

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(photo by Ellius Grace)

Rest in Power, Sinéad.

Thank you.

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FULL SONG CREDITS:

Lead Vocals - Amanda Palmer
Backing Vocals - The Righteous Babes (Gracie and Rachel, Holly Miranda, Jocelyn Mackenzie)
Vocals recorded by Christopher Bittner at Applehead Studios

Violin 1 - Adrianne Pope
Violin 2 - Andrew Tholl
Viola - Marta Sofia Honer
Cello - Isaiah Gage
Conductor and Drums - Jherek Bischoff
Recorded by James Riotto at Altamira Sound

Upright Bass, Electric Bass, Synth, Acoustic Gutiar - Jherek Bischoff
Recorded by Jherek Bischoff at Sweethaven

Co-produced, Arranged, Mixed, and Mastered by Jherek Bischoff

------THE NEVER-ENDING AS ALWAYS---------

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