Mad Man - Necessary Evils #5 - Ch. 4 (Patreon)

Chapter 4

Felix

Felix spent the flight to Washington doing his best to look unbothered, even as he reeled inside. He scrolled on his phone, took selfies, posted updates, and absolutely did not covertly check Avi’s social media feeds, rating the looks of the men who stood beside him in the photos.

Outside, the night was inky black, the clouds far below them. Felix should have grabbed a nap, just in case Aiden put them to work immediately. But he didn’t. Instead, he stewed on whether or not he was in the wrong. When he couldn’t take it anymore, he opened his texting app and messaged Noah. You told him I was a virgin!?

You didn’t? Noah shot back.

Felix sighed. He didn’t have the energy to fight about it, especially not with Noah. Sure, some part of him felt guilty for not telling Avi, even though it wasn’t really any of his business. Felix would like to say he wouldn’t have done it again if given the chance, but he was wrong. The minute Avi had kissed him, he’d been gone.

He glanced over at the other side of the plane, where Avi sat sideways, taking up two plush seats, knees raised and phone in his hands. Did he sense Felix needed space, or did Avi now need space from him?

Felix knew he was a lot. Maybe he’d overreacted, but when Avi had asked about him being a virgin, the question had hit him like a baseball bat. He wasn’t expecting it. It wasn’t like it had been a secret, but it had been a secret from Avi. That Felix was sure of. He’d thought, if Avi knew the truth, it would somehow solidify that Felix was just Jericho’s baby brother, not an actual person.

“If you want sex, I’ll give it to you. Anytime you want. You don’t need other men.”

Felix chewed at his full lower lip, slipping his knife free of its ankle strap to run the razor sharp blade under his manicured nails. What was that even supposed to mean? Was Avi proposing a friends with benefits situation? If so, why did he make it sound like he was doing some kind of public service? Like giving Felix dick was his civic duty or something. Felix was nobody’s booty call. He certainly wasn’t anybody’s charity case.

He might be out of Avi’s league, but Felix refused to settle for anything less than a man who absolutely worshipped him like a fucking god, and if he never found that, then he’d be fine living with his friends. And maybe a cat. Or lots of cats. After watching what his older sister went through, Felix would never let a man convince him he was worthless.

No amount of loneliness would ever make Felix somebody’s bookmark. He was too pretty. And talented. Sure, he was prickly, neurotic, and a little insane, but he was sure his hot to crazy ratio still skewed in his favor. He was someone’s total package, even if he wasn’t Avi’s.

Every time Felix flicked his gaze upward to check on Avi, he would find him watching him over the top of his phone, his expression unreadable. That was the thing about the twins. They could just go blank at will, and when they did, you were locked out of whatever they were thinking. Felix wished his every thought wasn’t etched into his facial expressions. The nuns used to say, ‘Don’t look at me in that tone of voice.’

Felix pretended not to notice Avi’s unwavering stare. People always thought of Asa and Avi as one person, which was so weird to Felix because they were such polar opposites. Asa was dominating, calculating, always in charge. Avi was not at all like that. He was sarcastic like Asa, sure. But Asa’s humor was acidic, biting. When he insulted someone, it left a mark.

Not Avi, though. He liked to tease, annoy, pester, but the only marks he was interested in leaving were on his victims. It was such a strange dichotomy. Avi loved killing people. He was genuinely excited when they got to take a person apart a piece at a time, but he wasn’t…mean. Felix shook his head. Nobody in the world would understand that. He let his head fall back against the seat.

When the plane landed, Aiden waited on the runway in a Jeep Wrangler back-lit by the bright white lights of the runway. When he saw Felix, Aiden hooked one thick eyebrow upwards at his brother, asking a silent question. Of course, Avi didn’t tell Aiden he was bringing him. Great. Aiden frowned at Felix’s outfit of baggy hunter green cargo pants and a black band t-shirt, knotted at his side, revealing a stripe of midsection.

If either of them thought he was going to be lounging around in flannel for the next four days, they were mistaken. His only concession had been the hiking boots he wore. Besides, Aiden had no business judging anybody’s fashion sense. He looked homeless, wearing jeans with holes in them and the aforementioned flannel shirt. He was even scruffier than the last time Felix had seen him.

At Jericho’s and Atticus’s wedding, he’d at least gotten a haircut and trimmed his beard. But today, he wore his long hair pulled off his face in a man-bun and had a beard that was about three inches too long and very unkempt. Aiden was an enigma. An often cranky one.

When Avi offered a hand to help him up into the Jeep, he stared at it for a long moment before taking it and letting him help him in. He could still feel the warmth when he let go.

“So, what’s this big kill you need my help with?” Avi asked from the passenger seat once they were on their way.

Aiden gave him a long look. “We both know I’ve never needed anybody’s help taking out a target. He’s already dead.”

“What?” Avi asked.

“The target. He’s already dead. Piece of shit set his ex on fire, so I did the same to him…slowly. Over several hours. Either way, he’s already taken care of,” Aiden said.

“Then why am I—are we—here?” Avi asked.

“Because Thomas wants you and Asa apart. I was supposed to stall you for four or five days. Keep you too occupied to worry about him.”

“But Thomas didn’t tell you to tell him the plan?” Felix said, examining his nails from the backseat.

“No, he didn’t, but I do have something you can help with. Both of you,” he added, almost as an afterthought.

Felix hoped, whatever this something was, it was worth being dragged away from civilization. They were in the city now, but it was clear they wouldn’t be there for long. “Does it have anything to do with the wilderness?” Felix asked.

Aiden cracked a grin. “No.”

Felix sighed. “Then count me in.”

The rest of the trip passed with Aiden and Avi chatting about the family. August’s and Lucas’s baby girls. How chill Atticus was now that he was with Jericho. Noah being Thomas’s protege. How Adam still pretended to be in charge, even though Noah called the shots.

“How is Thomas?” Aiden asked after they’d driven in silence for a while.

Avi narrowed his eyes at him. “Don’t you talk to him all the time?”

Aiden shrugged. “We talk about work. We’re…business partners.”

Felix snorted. He was practically a stranger and even he knew whatever was going on between Aiden and Thomas had nothing to do with business. At all. Aiden asked about Thomas like somebody asking their kids about an ex.

“Business partners don’t ask each other how they’re doing?” Felix asked.

Aiden gave another shrug. “It just doesn’t come up. Whatever, it’s not a big deal. Sorry I asked.”

Avi just stared at Aiden in confusion, like he had no idea what was happening. Sometimes, Felix felt bad for Avi. He was kind of like a cyborg trying to figure out human emotions that nobody had programmed into him.

The rest of the trip passed quickly, taking them from the highway to a practically deserted two-lane road to a one-lane, barely-there dirt path with trees so close they slapped against the doors and windows as they drove. Soon, they emerged into a circular clearing with only a small wood cabin.

The sky was as clear as Felix had ever seen it, far away from the noise pollution of the city. There were billions of stars in the sky, almost too many to fathom. The only light came from Aiden’s headlights as he came to a stop outside the cabin. When they exited the vehicle, he stopped to listen.

The wind whipped through the trees, the leaves creating an almost white noise effect. Somewhere close by, a stream burbled, but not close enough for Felix to see. There was a fire pit with a singular Adirondack chair beside it.

Felix went to grab his bag, but Avi snatched it before he could, giving him a look that practically begged him not to argue with him. Felix wasn’t going to argue. He didn’t want to carry his heavy bag; he was exhausted. It was almost one in the morning.

The inside of the house was even smaller than Felix had imagined. There was a tiny living room with only a couch, a dining room table with four chairs, a kitchen tucked into the corner of the room, and a ladder leading to a loft space where a sheet hung over the side.

Aiden walked past the loft down a narrow hall. He nodded towards the closed door. “That’s the bathroom. This is where you guys are bedding down.”

He opened the door and stood back. Avi walked in and set down their bags while Felix blinked stupidly at the full-size bed. “What?”

“This is your room,” Aiden said again.

“I’m not sharing a room with him,” Felix snapped, turning to glare at Avi. “I’m not sharing a room with you.”

Aiden looked back and forth between the two of them. He clearly had thought they were a couple. Why? Who knew. “I guess you could sleep on the couch, but there’s a spring on the left side that’s really going to fuck up your night.”

Avi’s face fell. “I’ll sleep on the couch.”

Something twisted inside Felix. “No. It’s fine. Whatever. You just stay on your side.”

“You guys hungry or did you eat on the plane?”

“Neither. I’m going to bed,” Felix said.

Avi looked back and forth between Aiden and Felix. “I could eat.”

Felix was both relieved and disappointed that he didn’t have to try to fall asleep next to Avi. He’d just close his eyes and go to sleep before Avi got back. Easy.

###

It wasn’t easy at all. Felix hadn’t packed as though he’d be sharing a bed with someone. A smoking hot someone who’d been running through his head on a loop for far too long. He wasn’t sleeping in his day clothes, though. Not for Avi. He donned the silky floral shorts that barely covered his ass but did put on a black cotton tank top, just to feel a little less naked. The more barriers between Avi and him, the better.

Felix tried to sleep, but the silence was intense. There were no car horns or ambulances. No sounds of his friends laughing and screaming and just being rowdy. He tossed and turned and did his best to shut off his brain, but when the door opened, a crack of light appearing and disappearing, he was still wide awake and on high alert.

The sound of Avi’s belt clanking and his zipper lowering shouldn’t have given Felix goosebumps, but it did. Was Avi planning on sleeping naked? Jesus. This was a fucking nightmare. Felix wasn’t that strong.

By the time Avi slid into bed behind him, Felix’s mouth was a desert and his dick was pressing against the silky shorts he wore. Felix was small but Avi wasn’t, and when he climbed into bed, the space between them evaporated. When Avi rolled onto his side, his breath puffed against the back of Felix’s neck.

Avi’s hesitant hand fell on his hip, making him jump. “Are you awake?”

“No,” Felix deadpanned.

Avi nosed behind Felix’s ear, his words pressed to his skin. “Can I get closer to you?”

Felix swallowed audibly. “If you must.”

The slow slide of Avi moving closer was agony, but then he was curling around him, the warmth of his body bleeding into Felix. Why did he have to smell so good?

“I said you could get closer, not that I wanted to be your little spoon.”

“Sorry,” Avi said, not sounding sorry at all and making no move to rectify the situation he’d put them in. The hand at Felix’s hip slid lower, fingers drawing feather-light patterns on his thigh before sliding back up. Felix’s breath caught when Avi tugged the fabric, pulling it taut across his now aching cock. “Silky.”

“If you like them so much, I’ll buy you a pair, then you can feel yourself up all you want.” Felix tried so hard to make it sound icy, but his chest constricted so bad he could barely get the words out.

“No, these are fine,” Avi said, fingertips teasing beneath the silk, then disappearing again.

“What are you doing?” Felix whispered.

“Touching you,” Avi said, his voice raw in a way that made Felix feel weirdly powerful.

“Why?”

Avi sounded…awestruck. “Because I can’t not touch you when you’re lying this close to me. Now that I know…”

“Know what?” Felix asked, kicking himself for prolonging this.

“How good you smell, how good kissing you tastes, how good being inside you feels.”

Lightning shot through Felix’s blood, but he shook his head. “You’re only saying that because we’re trapped in this bed together.”

Avi pulled Felix back against him, the length of his cock pressing against Felix’s ass. “Am I?”

Felix bit back a moan. He was used to a much different version of Avi. This one, with his breath against his ear and his hands on him like he had some kind of claim was much harder to combat. “Yes. We’ll get back to the real world and you’ll remember you like jocks who look good modeling your clothes.”

Avi laughed softly. “You think I’d rather have a guy who looks good in my clothes than the one I fantasize about seeing naked?”

Avi fantasized about him naked? Felix shook his head. That wasn’t the point. “We can’t do this again.”

When Avi’s lips skimmed Felix’s neck, his nipples hardened against the cotton fabric, his breath hitching when Avi said, “Why not? Don’t I deserve a do over?”

Felix’s body flushed hot, and he felt his head tilting of its own volition, giving Avi’s lips more skin to cover. His voice was barely a whisper. “There’s nothing to do over. You gave me what I wanted.”

“But did I give you what you needed?” Avi asked, fingers dipping up under his tank top to tease the soft skin there.

Felix bit down on his lip, praying he didn’t release the moan building in his throat. How was this somehow more sensually torturous than the sex itself? “I needed to forget my shitty day. So, yeah, you did.”

“I could have made it so good for you. I still can. I could do all the things I’ve thought about doing to you for so long.”

Felix needed to shut this down, but he found himself saying, “Like what?”

“Stripping you down, tasting every single part of you until you’re begging me for more, feeling your nails tear up my back as I fuck you.” Felix’s breath left him in a gasp. “You can still be in charge. I like it when you boss me around.”

Felix was so tempted to say yes and wanted nothing more than to make Avi make good on every one of those statements. But none of this was real. It was just a matter of…proximity. “You’ll feel different once we’re home.”

“This started at home,” Avi reminded him.

“Just… Just go to sleep,” Felix begged.

Avi stayed silent for so long, Felix was starting to think he’d fallen asleep. But then he asked, “Can I still hold onto you?”

His voice was filled with so much…hope, Felix couldn’t stop himself from saying, “Yeah, but nothing else.”

Avi’s hand appeared on his face, turning his head towards him. “Not even a kiss goodnight?”

Felix could just make out Avi’s features in the dark. Why was refusing him so much harder in the dark? “Just one.”

Before he had time to second-guess his own stupidity, Avi's lips were on his—not the hard, brash kiss from the other night but this long, slow, deep kiss that made Felix forget he hated him. When Avi’s tongue swept past his lips, he didn’t fight it. He couldn’t. He could barely breathe from the pressure building within him.

Then it was over. “Goodnight, kitten.”

Felix swallowed hard once more. “Night.”