Paladin - Jericho's Boys #1 - Ch. 12 (Patreon)

I have now read and revised this chapter so much it feels like gibberish. I truly hope its hot and doesn't suck. 

Ever

Ever had been through hell in his life. He’d endured by letting his thoughts float away somewhere safe, somewhere far outside of his pain. But this, this feeling, was the opposite of that.

He floated, for sure, but on this wave of euphoria like he’d never experienced. Every atom, every cell, every molecule engaged until Arsen’s touch made him want to purr like a cat.

Everything felt right. The heavy weight of Arsen’s body pressing him into the mattress, the spicy scent of his deodorant, the smoothness of his skin beneath Ever’s fingers. He wanted to memorize it all, save it to replay at a later date when he could give it the attention it deserved.

Arsen was so careful with him. Lying with only half of his body on Ever, probably worried he would panic beneath his full weight like last time.  But Ever didn’t feel trapped, he felt drunk. Every move Arsen made elicited a sensation so good, Ever couldn’t stop the tiny sounds spilling out of his mouth.

He would have been embarrassed if every one of those sounds didn’t elicit a response from Arsen. He could hear it in his ragged breaths, in the way he seemed to bite off a growl whenever Ever made those noises.

That was the real turn on. Being wanted by Arsen, seeing how his body responded to Ever’s, the way he fought for control, how every time he kissed Ever, he didn’t seem to want to stop.

It was powerful. It made Ever feel powerful. Important. Wanted.

Arsen had said clothes had to stay on, but Ever couldn’t stop himself from sliding his hands under Arsen’s hoodie. Where Ever’s skin was marred with scars, Arsen’s was smooth like silk and when he moved, his muscles flexed beneath Ever’s hands deliciously.

If making out was like this, sex had to be better. But he couldn’t imagine anything better than Arsen’s lips on his, the way his tongue teased its way into his mouth in a dizzying rhythm, even the way his arms caged him in. It was all perfect.

Arsen’s mouth broke from his, trailing kisses along his jaw, down his throat. Ever just completely gave in, too blissed out to even worry if he was doing something right or wrong. He rode the wave of pleasure, safe with Arsen…safe under Arsen.

Ever’s hands flexed, toes curling as Arsen continued to explore. His lips were so soft, his tongue wet as he licked at the hollow of his throat, sucked on his earlobe. Every time he moved to a new spot the scruff on his cheeks and chin scraped Ever’s skin, leaving him craving more.

Arsen spoke as he moved, murmuring things in a language Ever didn’t understand, his low, smooth tone hypnotic, only sinking him deeper into this almost trance-like state.

The more they kissed—the more Arsen touched him—the more Ever wanted, the more his body demanded, until kissing only left him frustrated and so hard he ached. Ever didn’t really understand what he wanted, only that he did. He shifted restlessly beneath Arsen, whining with need.

“Shh,” Arsen soothed, kissing Ever’s forehead, his nose, his cheeks. Ever gave another helpless whimper. He needed more. “I got you.”

Arsen shifted then, his thigh pressing against Ever’s throbbing cock in a way that stole his breath and his sanity. He couldn’t stop the moan that escaped. “Do it again…please?”

This time Arsen did growl, this sort of low rumble right in Ever’s ear. Goosebumps erupted over his whole body as Arsen did as Ever asked, flexing his thigh once more. The pleasure that simple movement brought was shocking, and Ever’s hips moved of their own volition, seeking more.

Ever could never have imagined anything like this sensation, it was rapturous, like a religious experience. This sort of pleasure could only be considered holy. The way Arsen moved against him was worthy of worship.

Arsen captured his mouth in a kiss that was far dirtier than any other so far, and started to pulse his leg against Ever’s erection in a steady rhythm until he was rolling his hips up to meet him, his fingers digging into Arsen’s back, spurring him on.

When Ever whined, Arsen sped up his movements. “Feel good?” he asked against his lips.

“Hnf,” was the only thing Ever could manage.

Good was such an insignificant word, this was…brilliant. Spectacular. Incandescent. Addictive. Some kind of erotic torture designed to make him crazy. And he couldn’t stop himself from chasing the sensation, rubbing against the thick muscle of Arsen’s thigh, not even knowing the outcome but still reaching for something…more. He needed more.

He made another frustrated sound.

“What’s wrong, besonok?” Arsen asked, tone almost teasing.

Was he enjoying Ever’s misery?

“More, please,” he begged, hoping somehow Arsen would know what he needed. Arsen always knew.

Arsen gave a low chuckle that melted the last tiny bit of Ever’s sanity. “More what?”

Ever floundered. How was he supposed to know? “Just…more. It hurts. Please…I need…”

Arsen’s voice was low and growly as he asked, “Need what?”

“I don’t know,” he said, bewildered, still moving against him, flushing with embarrassment.

He sucked at this.

Arsen’s weight disappeared. Ever’s heart sank. They couldn’t be done already? Just because he didn’t know what he wanted? But then Arsen was over him, using his thighs to widen Ever’s and settling between, keeping the weight of his upper body on his forearms now bracketing Ever’s head.

“Wrap your legs around me,” Arsen demanded.

Ever did without thought, sucking in a breath as his cock aligned with Arsen’s in a way that sent a shock of spine-melting ecstasy through his whole body.“Oh, fuck.”

He yelped as Arsen nipped his earlobe with his teeth. “You cursing might be the sexiest thing I’ve ever heard.”

Ever couldn’t even respond. He was far too caught up. Was this what sex between two people who wanted it was like? Was it like this every time? How did people function in the real world knowing they could be doing this instead?

It was all too much, too perfect. Arsen’s mouth was hot on his, his hands now threading in his hair, moving him just how he wanted him as he fucked up against him again…

… and again

… and again.

Until heat pooled in Ever’s belly, his body acting of its own accord, meeting every one of Arsen’s movements with a desperation he couldn’t explain.

What would it be like without clothes, without any barriers between them? What would it be like to have Arsen not just on top of him, but inside him? Moving inside him. His pulse pounded in his ears. His head spinning, dizzy at the thought of letting Arsen have every part of him. At wanting Arsen to have every part of him.

It was that thought that pushed him off the cliff, sent him free-falling into the most intense experience of his life, his release pulsing from him taking the last remnants of his brain function with it.

Arsen didn’t stop, just kept surging against him, chasing his own pleasure. That somehow only made it hotter. Arsen using him, using his body to make himself feel good. It was all so much.

Arsen gave a harsh groan, grinding his hips against Ever’s one last time, his release hot and wet on his skin, before collapsing on top of him. “Is this okay?” he asked, voice raw.

It took Ever longer than it should to know what he meant. Was he okay with Arsen on top of him? He didn’t know how to tell him he’d happily suffocate under him if it meant he could feel like this forever.

“Mm,” was all he managed, eyelids at half-mast.

They were both sweating. Ever’s pajama pants now stuck uncomfortably to his skin, but he couldn’t move. Didn’t want to. His bones had turned to Jell-O and if they never returned to normal Ever would still think it a worthy sacrifice.

Arsen’s head lay beside his on the pillow, his breath ragged in Ever’s ear. He had done that. He had put that dopey expression on Arsen’s face, had worn him out.

Ever already wanted to do it again.

“Are you okay?” Arsen managed.

Ever couldn’t stop the small laugh that escaped. He was better than okay. He was…giddy. High. He was sure his brain had melted.

“Is that a yes?” Arsen asked, kissing his temple.

Ever tilted his head closer to Arsen. “Yes. But I’m sticky.”

Arsen scoffed. “Yeah, the only downside to orgasms.”

Orgasms. His first. Hopefully not his only. “Can we do it again?” he blurted.

This time it was Arsen who laughed. “I think you’ll find that there’s a refractory period between performances.”

Ever made a sad sound. “Can we do it again later?”

Arsen rose up on his forearms. “I’ve created a monster.”

Before Ever could formulate a response, Arsen rolled off him and onto his back, then raised his arm so Ever could slide beneath it. He curled into his side, letting his head rest on his chest, able to hear Arsen’s rapidly beating heart even through his sweatshirt.

“Can we do it without clothes next time?” Ever asked.

Arsen laughed low. “We’ll see.”

“Can we do other things later?” Ever asked, sliding his hand up under Arsen’s shirt to splay his hands over his flat tummy.

Arsen hesitated, before asking, “Like what?”

Ever chewed on his bottom lip, willing himself to be brave. Noah said he held the upper hand. That Arsen wanted to give him what he wanted. “Like can you put your hands on me? And…your mouth? Not up here, but…lower.”

Arsen sucked in a breath, his belly dipping beneath Ever’s fingers. “You can’t just say things like that.”

Something withered inside Ever. He tried to move away. “Sorry.”

Arsen held tight. “No. Don’t run away. You can say whatever you want. I just meant it turns me on when you say stuff like that and I’m trying so hard to be the good guy”

Ever looked up at him. “You are a good guy. You’re the best guy,” he promised. “You saved me. You’re just like the paladin in your game.”

Arsen scoffed. “I’m no knight.”

Ever shrugged as best he could while curled into Arsen. “Well, I’m not a princess, but you still saved me. That makes you better than a knight.”

“How so?” he asked, amused.

Ever was serious. Arsen was so much better than any fictional character from a video game. “Knights take oaths, swear allegiance, do things out of obligation. You could have left me in that closet to die, but you didn’t. You could have dropped me at a police station, but you didn’t. You could have just left me on a street corner…but you didn’t. Because you’re a good person. The best person. That makes you better than any knight.”

When Arsen didn’t say anything, Ever looked up once more to find him looking down at him with a sort of shocked expression. “Did I say something wrong again?”

Arsen squeezed him against his side until Ever thought he might crush him. “No. No you didn’t. I was just thinking about my life if I hadn’t opened that door and it scared me a little. We barely know each other but the thought of my life without you in it scares me.”

Ever’s heart did a cartwheel in his chest. “Me too.”

They fell silent after that, but Arsen kept dropping kisses on the top of Ever’s head, his fingers drawing lazy patterns on his back through his t-shirt.

Just as Ever was starting to drift off, Arsen said, “Let’s get cleaned up and go sleep in my bed.”

Ever was loath to stand up, but he nodded. “Okay.”

Arsen crawled over him to stand, then grabbed his hand, pulling him to his feet and leading him out the door. They were almost to the bathroom when a thought crashed down on him like an anvil. “Arsen?”

“Yeah?”

Ever’s heart clenched. “What happens if they never figure out who I really am?”

Arsen didn’t hesitate. “Then we create a new identity for you. You can be whatever you want to be.”

“I just want to be yours,” Ever blurted, immediately blushing.

Arsen tugged Ever in front of him, his arm wrapping around him from behind like a steel band, lifting him off his feet and carrying him like he weighed nothing. Ever’s knees came up to his chest as he tried to wiggle free with a laugh but Arsen wasn’t budging.

“I swear you’re trying to kill me,” Arsen said, hauling him into the bathroom like a sack of potatoes and depositing him on the edge of the sink.

They were supposed to be cleaning up, but as soon as Ever’s butt hit the cold counter, he wrapped his arms and legs around Arsen once more in a full body hug. “Thank you.”

“For what?” Arsen asked, his confusion obvious.

“For not being a bad guy.”

Arsen hugged him back, but said, “I’m a murderer.”

Ever didn’t care. “Nobody’s perfect.”

When Arsen stepped back, he reached for the hem of Ever’s t-shirt. He snatched his wrists, panic clawing at him. “No.”

Arsen frowned at him. “What’s wrong?”

Ever froze. What was wrong? Arsen had seen Ever’s back before, but not the rest. Not the other scars. “It’s bad.”

“What’s bad,” Arsen asked, brow furrowed.

Ever swallowed the lump of sand in his throat. “The…damage. The…scars. It’s worse in the light.”

Arsen blinked at him, then kissed his forehead. “It’s okay.”

Ever’s heart hammered in his chest. It didn’t feel okay, but he nodded, releasing his wrists. Arsen peeled Ever’s shirt off, dropping it to the floor, then hissed as he saw Ever’s back in the mirror.

Ever looked up just in time to see his expression grow dark. He didn’t know what it looked like since the last of his injuries had healed, but even before then, his back had been a road map of pain. Long tracks of scar tissue criss-crossed his shoulders and trunk where the belt buckle had torn his skin. There were random burn scars on his upper arms, a puncture wound from where Jennika had jabbed a screwdriver into his shoulder for burning dinner.

It was all so ugly. He was ugly.

Arsen hugged him again, hard, like he tried to say something without words. Ever just sat there, limp in his arms. Those scars were permanent. They would never go away. He would look like that forever. It was humiliating.

Arsen stepped back and pulled his own shirt off in one fluid motion, then turned to show Ever his back. There was a strangely shaped scar on his right shoulder, two wide marks side by side.

Ever reached out and touched them, they were smooth.

“My father shoved me into a steam pipe when I was little. We all have scars, besenok.”

When he turned to face him once more, Ever’s hands fell on his chest,  fingertips tracing the scorpion tattoo on the right side of his chest. “Why is this the only tattoo not in color?”

“We all have it. Seven, Lake, Cree, Nico, Levi, Felix, all of us. We got it for Jericho. So he’d know what he means to all of us.”

“Why a scorpion?”

“Cause he’s a Scorpio,” Arsen said, then added. “And cause it looked cool and was cheap enough for all of us to afford at the time.”

Ever smiled at that. It was all so sweet and normal. Except it wasn’t. Arsen was a killer and so were his friends. So was Jericho. It seemed so surreal to think that Ever lived among killers but had never felt safer.

He trailed his hand across his chest to the tattoo encircling his nipple. The words press start.  What did that even mean? Before he could ask, Arsen took his hands and brought them to his lips. “Shower,” he said like he was reminding himself.

He pulled Ever from the counter. Once he was on his feet, Arsen’s thumbs hooked in the waistband of his pajama pants. Ever closed his eyes. He didn’t want to see Arsen’s reaction.

There were more jagged scars across his ass, his thighs, a few across his hips from when the belt got away from her. He stood, trembling, eyes squeezed shut as he waited for Arsen to say something. Anything. To ask what happened. But he didn’t.

Ever sucked in a breath, eyes jolting open, as Arsen’s lips trailed over the scar on his hip, then one across his ribs. He was on his knees in front of Ever, looking up at him with those pool blue eyes. He reached back and gripped the counter, not at all sure what to do with his hands in this situation. He wasn’t entirely sure what the situation was.

Arsen kissed Ever’s belly again, then his thigh, then his tongue traced the dip of his hips, hands sliding behind Ever to cup his ass, squeezing gently. Ever didn’t know anything about refractory periods, but he was already half-hard again. Arsen watched his face as he placed open-mouth kisses over Ever’s belly.

Ever nodded. He didn’t really know why. It just felt like Arsen was asking him something. Arsen took him in hand, tongue darting out once more to run along the underside of his cock, before his mouth closed over him, engulfing him in the most perfect heat ever.

Ever’s knees buckled at the first pull of Arsen’s lips. Arsen’s hands dug into Ever’s hip bones holding him up even as he sucked him. He was so strong. It was so hot. Ever had to be dreaming. A low moan escaped, but he clamped down on his lip, trying to muffle it.

Arsen pulled off with a pop. “Don’t be quiet on my account.”

Ever blushed, squeezing his eyes shut once more. If he kept watching Arsen’s head bobbing, he was going to come in three seconds. He was already getting that same intense heat pooling in his stomach, his spine tingling. It just felt so fucking good, each movement sending sparks over every nerve ending. The sound of Arsen sucking was obscene. And so fucking sexy.

Ever’s fingers threaded through Arsen’s tresses without thought, gripping tighter every time Arsen took him to the back of his throat, the muscles there convulsing around him, encasing him in the tightest, wettest heat. Soon he was fucking into Arsen’s mouth without thought, desperate to come for a second time. He was so close…he just needed a little more.

“Oh, fuck. Oh, fuck. Arsen…” he didn’t know why he said his name, only that he needed to say it. Then he was coming a second time, his release spilling onto Arsen’s tongue before he could even warn him.

Arsen didn’t stop though, just kept sucking until Ever shivered from oversensitivity, pushing him back with a hiss. Arsen got to his feet, then captured Ever’s lips in another kiss, letting him taste himself on his tongue.

“Now we can shower,” Arsen said, reaching over to turn on the water.