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The Fluffer - Page 11 [Ink] (Patreon)

Published:
2019-01-15 22:35:31
Imported:
2026-06

Content

Made a pretty silly mistake while inking this one- I'm sure you can see it. Probably best he doesn't announce to everyone around that 'this is perfect' when one of his coworkers suddenly loses consciousness... 

Anyway, as usual, should be fixable. Just annoying. Grr. 

Files

Comments

Matsi

mmmph I wanna see that fox bitch take all of that horse dick! :P I feel like that horse right now! LOL I hate waiting xD

Myufoxy

Do not get in between a fox and cock.

Bloudin Ruo

There are a few things I'd like to point out in here for the coloring of this page, and general overall going forward. As you know from me I can be harsh, but I do it because I want to give you real feedback. So, to begin. Panels #1 and #2 make Kyle look really, really small in comparison even to the 'average' sized female actor. Maybe it's because he's kneeling down, but even just his general proportions feel smaller that the relative size difference between him and the other actors in previous pages, especially panel #2. That's one of the things meant for 'general' going forward in the story rather than something to be fixed here, since his lines are so integrated into other characters. Kyle's expression in panel #4 feels ever so slightly off, but I couldn't tell you why and I don't think it's really any kind of issue. Just something that popped out to me real quick when I was going over everything. Dialogue is actually something I want to poke at in this page a bit. Kyle's "This bed is a bit of a mess" could use some disambiguation; is it physically messy, or is Kyle trying to get her moved by implying that the bed isn't a good place for her to lay on? The "I got it" from the stallion in panel #3 could be made into something less formal or succinct, maybe even removing the line altogether and just going with "Uh, sure..." trailing off with a little bit of confusion. "They'd been going at it..." in panel #5 would feel a bit more natural by changing "They'd" to "They've", making it, "They've been going at it for a while..." since it was happening until just a minute ago. Finally, the "Naw" Kyle says in the last dialogue bubble could probably be cut. It's an internal thought, usually people don't use conversational nuances like that in their own heads :P Anyways, take all this as suggestions and nothing more! Just trying to give you any feedback I can to help you improve. Also, our stallion friend has been sporting a full hardon this whole time... Professional.