Countless Joyful Dawns - Chapter ?? - 11: The Fairy Queen (Patreon)

Dragon and Colin talked the whole meandering trip over. I shamelessly eavesdropped to make sure they weren’t going to try something stupid. After doing some initial wordy checks - possibly confirming they were who they said they were, and updates on conditions, but with a good code I didn’t know - they slipped into a more personal and private discussion. Interestingly, there was a modest amount of legal discussion. Huh. Colin had read some of the legal library. Although, maybe I’d need to direct him a bit more, Exterreri constitutional law was a bit off the mark, although I could see why he’d read into Sentinel powers. Challenging the arrest itself wasn’t a terrible strategy, and it made me extra-glad I had crossed my t’s and dotted my i’s.

Speaking of, I had my own paperwork to do. I teleported a large stack out, and started to work my way through it, occasionally taking looks out the window. I was a little annoyed with Dragon taking the scenic route - I wanted to get home as quickly as possible - but at the same time, my plot needed time to work, and while she was taking the scenic route, I might as well enjoy the views. 

I was Immortal. I had time to smell the flowers.

But the lives I was aiming to save were mere mortals, and the sands of time in the hourglass of their life were flowing quickly. A thousand years in purgatory would still be a thousand years.

Impatience had always been my enemy, and I managed to battle it as we traveled. Eventually, after a torturous three hours, we started to descend.

Slowly.

“Elaine, can I make one last appeal for you to release Armsmaster and Director Piggot?” Dragon asked me. “It does them no good to be trapped in the Birdcage with you. Please. They’re good people.”

I thought of a lot of replies, but decided to keep it simple.

“I’m sorry, I must decline.” I said. “A list of people you don’t believe should be in the Birdcage, like Armsmaster, would be useful for me.”

Dragon paused, and to my surprise, a sheet of paper with a list of names was printed out. 

“I’m putting you with Glaistig Uaine.” She said through her projected screen. “Possibly the only person you won’t object to being in the Birdcage…”

What did she do? Huge amounts of murder? White collar crimes? I couldn’t guess what they considered ‘the worst’.

“... since she’s there voluntarily.”

Oh. Yeah. That would do it. I quickly scanned the list of names and hit another problem.

“Er. I have no idea who any of these people are.” I said. “It’d be incredibly easy for someone to just lie and pretend to be someone they’re not, then I’m releasing someone who might belong.”

Dragon looked thoroughly unimpressed.

“Elaine, you’re still assuming you’ll be able to get out. I built the Birdcage. I’m confident that this is a one-way trip for you. I don’t want to tell you all the elements, because that’ll help you circumvent them. However, the facility is hanging in a vacuum, inside of a mountain. Tunneling will simply lead you into a harsh, drone-filled vacuum. Please don’t do that. Supplies are one-way. Elevators are single-use. I will tell you that if you try to teleport up the elevator shaft, the facility is designed to automatically self-destruct rather than let you out.”

Well, shit.

One of the trickier elements of my [Oath] was how it interacted with other people’s actions. ‘First, do not harm’ was the first, and arguably most, important line. Almost as important was the self-defense clause, otherwise I’d be nearly entirely helpless. And in the wrong line of work.

How did I end up as a military commando as a pacifist medic? Oh right, only option at the time, then just going with the flow. Plus, they were pretty good at pointing me towards problem spots.

Broadly, I took no responsibility for other actions that people took as a result of my actions. “I’ll murder this person unless you do X” had no power over me. Well, some - I took a dim view of people using hostages and lives like that - but if I refused to commit the action and they attempted to murder the person anyway, it wasn’t me. I didn’t stab the blade, I didn’t slice the knife, the blood was firmly on the hands of the person committing the action.

Automatically changed the game. Because it was much less ‘someone else’s’ action, and far more ‘this is what I did.’ Slicing hairs, and not everyone would get to the same result, but I considered it similar to knocking a brick off a rooftop. Yeah, it wasn’t my fault the brick was there - but I still directly set it into motion, leading it to cracking someone’s head open.

I spun off a thought process to consider taking everyone out of the Birdcage and letting it blow itself up. Probably wouldn’t… but I would consider the ethics and morality of it, as well as how it accomplished my long term goals. Or not. 

Dragon told me a number of other things - disintegration fields, containment foam, and more. All I was hearing was ‘the shovel and pickaxe might get a workout’, depending on how thick the rest of the mountain was. Since they were generally piles of rocks, not a single huge slab, I was hopeful that it wouldn’t be too far. Just had to be careful of falling rocks while in a vacuum. 

Pity the Argo II had been in a museum that got blown up. It would’ve been useful here. 

“That’s all good, but can I please get descriptions of the inmates you suspect don’t belong?” I asked. 

Dragon frowned, but I got a second list printed. I let Colin and Dragon spend the majority of their remaining time talking with each other. I’d arrested him, but I wasn’t a monster. I could talk with Dragon more in a bit.

“Please note. There are several young parahumans that do belong inside the Birdcage. Please do not release them. Here’s a list of the crimes they were convicted of, and what they were suspected of doing but we didn’t prove in court.”

Dragon proceeded to print out an entire book, for just four names. It wasn’t court cases and transcripts either - just a pure list of crimes, two per row.

Right then. Those four had earned their way into the Birdcage, and I wasn’t going to release them back into the wild. 

She tried again to convince me to let Colin go, but I refused. They had a touching farewell before he returned back to my [Manor], and I was soon on the elevator shaft with a bundle of supplies, down into the Birdcage. A question I had popped back into my head.

“Glaistig Uaine’s quite a name. Does it mean anything?” I asked.

“She’s also known as the Fairy Queen, if her name’s a bit too much of a mouthful.”

Fuck.

Fuck!FUCK!

There was someone claiming to be the fairy queen in the Birdcage!? Oh dear gods and goddesses, oh intelligence failures, oh this was bad! Bad bad bad!

I had a small breakdown of utterly incoherent thought and panic. 

Someone was climaing to be a fairy, and the fae hadn’t utterly fucked her over? 

A smidgeon 

Unless… wait, maybe this was a shortcut home.

Rules, rules, rules for the fae. I went through my mental library and pulled out the Sacred Texts, the rules Night had laid down for me when dealing with the fair folk.

Hey, maybe if she wasn’t actually a fairy, she’d still follow them.

The rules!

Strike no deal with them, make no bargain.

Take nor offer a gift.

Be nothing if not polite and courteous. Give no insult.

Do not lie. They can not lie, but never think they speak the truth.

Keep your word.

Do not give them thanks.

Do not partake of their food or wine.

Do not spy, nor violate their privacy.

Do not give them your full name… a task you might struggle with. Give them a moniker if you must.

Do not violate their rings.

These things seven may grant protection against the Fae, each in its own manner.

Cold Iron, pressed to flesh.

A four-leaf clover, to grant vision.

Wearing clothes inside out, to confuse, amuse, and befuddle.

Salt, sprinkled around in a circle.

Arcanite, pulsing with mana to blind.

The Symbol of the Five Gods, worn sincerely

A wreath of holly, a crown upon your head.

Okay, okay, I could do this. I sprang into motion.

I teleported out a chainlink necklace made out of cold iron. I didn’t have any fresh four leaf clovers, and I’d rather go in knowing my vision was potentially compromised, instead of falsely believing what I was seeing was accurate. My armor was quite practical, but I could handle physical threats well. I swapped it out for an inside-out tunic. I couldn’t get a mobile ring of salt going. Well, I could, but it’d be obvious, offensive, and very likely violate the spirit in some ineffable way as to screw me over. I debated trying to blind the Fairy Queen with arcanite, but she’d be one of the greater fae, and it could possibly rebound on me. We had dozens of Symbols, but the only ones I could wear sincerely were Ciriel’s. I decided the sincerity was more important, and teleported one on.

And while I didn’t have fresh four leaf clovers, I did have a crown of holly in one of the more protected vaults. I slapped that on, and teleported out a large meal.

I could just eat inside my [Manor], but there was always the tiniest risk. Better stock up now, and eat after. This shouldn’t take too long. Unless it took tens of thousands of years.

I seriously debated calling the entire thing off. I’d already healed everyone in the Birdcage. My printer was up and running, thousands of fliers for a fake rally stacking up on shelves. My calling was to heal, not to fix all the injustices of the world, no matter how aberrant I found them.

And yet…

There were children, babies, who’d never see the light of day if I didn’t go through with this. Who’d never see the sun, feel the wind, or watch the clouds. They’d never go to school, or lead anything close to a normal life. Without me, their lives would be endless grey cells. Their whole world would be a prison.

No, I wasn’t going to be selfish. I was going to go, once more, into the breach. I was, to put it in local terms, going to be a hero.

It was about doing the right thing, even when it was hard, even when it put me, personally, at great risk. 

“Um. Elaine. Are you alright?” Dragon asked me, a note of concern in her voice even as she lowered me into the worst prison in the world.

“Alright? ALRIGHT!?” I was getting a little frantic, and I took a moment to center myself. “You’ve got a fairy down there, the warning would’ve been nice.”

There was a long pause, and I realized the issue before Dragon said anything.

“Oh, don’t tell me you’re one of the people who don’t believe in fairies.” I said, my voice dripping with scorn.

“There’s no good evidence for them.” Dragon replied.

I tried to take a step away from her, but step away where? Instead, I chose the role of the educator.

“Listen. Dragon. The fae are very real, and are very dangerous. They’re how I ended up here, after all, and it’s not the first time they’ve…”

I almost said ‘screwed me over’, but I was about to meet with one any second now. 

“... had interesting interactions with me.” I finished. 

The dead silence was interrupted by a solid thunk as the elevator reached the bottom. Or, er, wait - there was a whole ‘dead drop’ below us. So sorta the bottom. The end of the reasonable line.

The door opened, and I saw three people in front of me. Flunky #1, Flunky #2, and in the middle, holding herself as regally as could be, wearing tattered clothing with ghostly retainers behind her, was Glaistig Uaine, the fairy queen herself.

I immediately courtseyed.

“Your majesty.” I said.

Flunky #1 rolled her eyes. Glaistig Uaine spoke, her voice reverberating.

“You are not one of the fae.” She frowned at me. I shook my head furiously.

“I would never claim such an honored distinction.” I said. 

“Then what are you doing here?” Flunky #2 asked, visibly confused. “They only send parahumans to the Birdcage.”

I had a strong suspicion I was utterly missing something, but the first rule was don’t offend the fairy.

Heck, even if she was playing pretend, she was doing so well enough to not draw the ire of the fae, and if I insulted her or worse, the fae might retaliate against me anyways.

I glanced at the fairy queen, who looked bored. Bored was good. I could work with bored. 

“There’s far too many innocents inside the Birdcage. I’m here for a jailbreak. Would you mind giving me directions, please?”