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The sun glares through the barn’s open door, spotlighting my shame. I crouch in the center of the room, fingers twisted in my hair, jaw clenched so hard it throbs. Not again. Not today.

My skin prickles—a warning. I scratch at my arms, my thighs, but the itch isn’t on the surface, it’s just beneath.

“Stop,” I whisper, as if the curse could listen.

My knees hit the dirt as my spine bows against my will. No. Fight it. Fight. My hands shake as I fumble with my shirt buttons. Last time, the fabric shredded, leaving me without clothes in the middle of nowhere. This time, I strip - just in case. Honestly, I’m proud that I remembered to do this.

The first moo claws up my throat—raw, involuntary. I slap a hand over my mouth. Shut up. But it swells, vibrating through my ribs, and god, it’s… relief. A pressure valve released. My resolve cracks. The fur comes faster now, tawny and thick, swallowing my hips, my breasts. My nostrils flare–too wide, unnaturally wide. I sob, but it warps into another moo, louder, deeper. My toes curl in the dirt, nails hardening. 

“Please,” I beg, though of course there’s nobody listening.

My hips widen, bones grinding, and I collapse into a squat, thighs straining. The posture is obscene. My human mind rebels—I am not a beast, I’m not this—but the changes are relentless. The moos come steady now, rhythmic, soothing. Each one unravels me further. Thought blurs beneath the drumbeat of instinct: graze, herd, safety.

When it’s over, I slump on all fours, panting. The barn reeks of hay and musk. I try to stand, but my body won’t straighten. My hands—hooves—sink into the earth. A fly lands on my flank. My tail flicks. Twitch. Automatic.

The worst part? The peace. The absence of struggle. I hate how good it feels to surrender.

Beyond the barn, the meadow hums with crickets. My nostrils flare—grass, clover, water.

I don’t move. Not yet.

But the moo rumbles in my chest, low and hungry.

And this time… I don’t fight.

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