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ANALYSIS: Audio of Alex's Ex-Wife Debbie (Patreon)

Published:
2021-11-03 19:03:48
Imported:
2026-06
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Content

John and I listen to the call between Debbie and Police, and share our initial thoughts. Debbie married Alex Cox when she was 22-years-old. They were married for less than a year. 

For more breakdown on the Cox family dynamics, head to our podcast, and listen to episodes: 7 through 9. https://hiddentruecrime.podbean.com/

Comments

CBell

I loved the cricket noises A+ ambience

CBell

When I was 17 my best friend brought me to stay at the family home of her friend/classmate. My jaw dropped when Debbie started describing the inappropriate behaviour between Cox family members because it was SO similar to what I saw that night and for the longest time I just couldn’t understand: 1, how the family could be so unaware how strange their behaviour was that they’d act that way in front of a stranger and 2, how my friend could be unbothered enough to repeatedly stay over at that house because I’d never felt so unsafe in a home before. I’d gone to Christian elementary schools and what blew my mind at the time was that I knew their family to be very religious and this girl later told me that she couldn’t fully trust my morals because I was no longer religious.

Tamara Wakeman Sukohl

My grandma kept a real live cricket in a drawer in her house because she loved the sound of crickets. She would have loved a cricket white noise machine!

Pamela Mosdell

I wonder if Alex displayed qualities that gave people hope that he could be better. He seemed to have a lost puppy quality. I know that can encourage people to try to fix that individual.

Pamela Mosdell

That streak of meanness in Alex presents in his callousness about killing the dogs in the desert.

Pamela Mosdell

It’s so telling about the Cox family dynamics that Lori didn’t introduce her husbands to her family before marrying and neither did Alex.

Maraley Santos

A real life Flowers in the Attic: Cox family edition! I have a feeling their exalted status (do not have to follow mortal laws or feelings, ie could not be held liable for their actions by mortals) allowed them to feel no guilt about their relationship. He wasn’t her brother, he was her protector!

Lauri Bolland

I was raised in a family and extended family much like the Cox family. There was significant abuse & neglect. No one in the family sees abuse or neglect as abusive. They see it as love and the best way to live. Also, there's a lot of fear within the family dynamic to not become the scapegoat, so lots of members will play enablers to the abuse. When all the adults have sociopathic, narcissistic, and histrionic behaviors with psychotic episodes (and perhaps schizo disorders) most of the kids will end up exactly like the parents. A few scapegoats might have a true self and speak up and then become the target of the whole family. There are very few options for most people in this family dynamic, in my anecdotal experiences.

CuriousinColorado

Great analysis -again! I am kind of tired of writing “spot on” (not really) regarding your initial analysis. Have we gotten any information from the older brother and sister about abuse/ sexual abuse in the family or is this mainly an Alex/Lori thing? Didn’t the other kids observe this same behavior that Debbie saw?

CuriousinColorado

Btw… glad to hear your voice Dr John. I hope all is well 💕

Joanna Mulvaney
>>71113907

Agree or at the least uncomfortabley “playful” or “affectionate” and the threat of SA.

Maraley Santos
>>71114626

Bahahahaha! Right!? Not even in her wildest dreams could she make up stuff this twisted !

B Sprak

Are psychopaths completely unemotional? I've always considered my ex a psychopath, though I'm no expert. Nothing is ever his fault. He's the pinnacle of wisdom and acceptable human behavior. He's sadistic. Killed a pet. Was excessively controlling. After the first few years, there was no pleasing him. He'd continually raise or change the bar. Daily used techniques barred by the Geneva Convention for treatment of POW's. Brought stalking to a fine art after I left. I guess my point is, he took joy from control and pain, and he definitely felt rage. Rage was there whenever he couldn't control someone. I always felt lucky to get out alive. Listening to what happened with Chad and Lori, to what they managed to convince others of, is just horrid. Triggering. But more just horrifying.

Vixen 9808
>>71112807

I wonder if Adam introduced Nicole to his family and she married him anyway? Because if I had grown up in Casa Cox, I would have moved as far away as possible with my new husband and never introduced him to Barry & Janis. Debbie is so lucky she got the hell out and never had to co-parent with Alex.

Vixen 9808
>>71113907

Me too (and Alex with Colby as well). The family court ordered cameras installed in Lori & Charles' house -including children's bedrooms, IIRC- to investigate alleged inappropriate sexual behavior from various children in the blended family. I have NEVER heard of a Court ordering such a thing.

B Sprak

Gotta wonder if Alex & Chad both finding Lori hot caused Alex to be jealous of Lori.

Kristina Westbrook

When she asked Alex if the touching would be allowed with there kids, I took it as between the kids. Not him touching them. Neither are good .

RobynB

Love crickets and this analysis. 😊

Misty Welker

I think if you exhumed alex and did an I.Q. test it would be the same as if he was alive…. Just sayin’.

Marcella Able

Again, thank you Lauren & Dr John for your analysis of this interview with Alex’s ex. Btw, love the crickets

RobynB

Explains Tylee feeling the need to have a baseball bat for protection and why in gods name would you desert your autistic son and leave your teenage daughter with pervert Alex while you traipse around Hawaii?

Inner Peas

Lord have mercy, this family gets creepier by the day.

Darcy Johnson

I think you are spot on, Lauren…regarding Prior insinuating an inappropriate behavior between Lori and Alex, when questioning (MG?)…. I got the same vibe.

Darcy Johnson

Dr John…I have also had that vibe about Alex…being like Alex, what a perfect job. I have wondered if there isn’t more victims after learning about the 15 yr old. I find it hard to believe he got “caught” the first time… there are more….no doubt.

Katie Marlowe

Lauren, you’re right about the preliminary hearing and Prior’s insinuations regarding Alex and Lori. There was nothing subtle about it. It will be interesting to hear what Chad witnessed between them; although, I hope it won’t serve to bolster an effective defense for him.

Nora Ann

Lori had no qualms of leaving her daughter with Alex. Tylee telling the woman who interview her about why she had a bat by her bed started when she lived with Alex. Chilling. I wonder if Tylee had problems at school and if her school records were looked into. Did she ever talk to a counselor there? How much school did she miss? How did Lori act in school conferences, etc.. Another thing I wonder about is Alex’s passport. What countries did he visit?

Nora Ann

While they were married he was excommunicated. What did he do? Did he commit adultery? She said earlier that they weren’t attending church during their marriage, so why would the church do that? Did someone in the church, like the 15 year old father come forward, who maybe was a member of the church tell the bishop? And if so, the bishop would have had to call in the police about it as the Bishop is a mandated reporter even back in the 90’s.

Nora Ann

He would go after a younger sister, not an older sister. The older sibling has more power. And maybe he went after the youngest sister when she developed.

Shannon Moak

Excellent analysis! I’d love to hear feedback from Adam Cox (or Zac) on Alex and Lori’s relationship.

Dal Pace

Does anyone remember who stated that Lori would be the only one at family barbecues traipsing around in a bikini?

Johanna Van Winkle

This family was totally messed up. I was wondering all along if Alex and Lori had an incestous relationship.....

Chelsea Watts

Am I the only one who laughed at the statement “I was shocked by the tasing?” I’M SORRY. 🤣😖

Meg

It's crazy to me that the Cox family try to portray a religious LDS family yet shrug off that Alex goes to colombia to sleep with sex workers. This family is all do what I say not as I do. For example Barry going to Steve's work and assaults him along with reading scripture. Barry also allegedly slept with sex workers. He acts so righteous yet breaks the law. Lori cheated on Charles and ruined Joe Ryan's life yet acted so righteous as well. It's like they are so judgemental but do outrageous things that are against the religion they swear by. And then there's Chad-- I'm really leaning into him having a Machiavellian disorder. He also is portraying one way and giving his final judgement on people yet does the most despicable things.

Stephanie M

My fiancé comes from a narc family. No contact for 4 years now. I have watched something very similar to this happen before my eyes. Not as bad but similar. I wouldn’t be surprised if Alex told Lori about his wife’s feelings and Lori flirting with her brother even more after finding out that information. EVERY female she comes across is competition. It’s no unessexary

Stephanie M

I wonder if Alex and Lori did this in front of her more “current” husbands

Roberta S Treacy

Given that it seems that Alex had porous sexual boundaries, is it likely that he molested Tylee? I’m also wondering why this train wreck is so fascinating to me. If it were only a book or a crappy movie/TV, I would not bother to watch. If all these players were on drugs, then it might make some sort of sense, but no. . . It boggles my mind that these people are real. Even paying attention to this is a huge waste of time, yet here I am. I cannot stop watching this tragic farce. I feel so bad for all the victims and know that my rubber necking doesn’t help them. I need a better hobby.

TriciaTheTrucker

Hi everyone, I am not a new listener, but I am a new patreon. You guys make a great team, and I love your podcast etc! I have a few questions/comments...and this is the first time I've been able to ask, so sorry it will be long. First, Chad is a doofus...that love story 🤦🏻‍♀️! Now that that's out of the way, I'm wondering if anyone else can corroborate Debbie's experiences with the Cox family. I think they probably can, but the real question is would they? Adam's wife, Stacey's ex-husband, or maybe even things that Charles told Kay? I'm also very very interested in finding out what summer knew. I think she was as involved as the two Melanies. Also, I always found it bizarre that Lori so easily accepted Chad calling her a goddess... And after listening to this, it made more sense. She had a lifetime of her family, especially Alex, placing her on some kind of pedestal which probably fanned the flames of her narcissism. And lastly, I wonder if Alex died because Chad was jealous of his obsession with Lori...

RobynB

Welcome to the Patreon Fam, Patricia!😊

Crystal Swannack

Oh gosh. You know what, Alex wouldn't have to go to Columbia just to find women. Okay that is super super scary. He could have easily found women of age here to pay for sex. Going to Columbia could possibly have serious nefarious implications. What if he really was a pedophile and it's much more than just the 15-year-old girl the one time? That's so sickening to think about but make so much sense

TriciaTheTrucker
>>71479735

I was thinking the same thing!!! If it's true that he was a pedophile.... How could he possibly think God would ask him to do anything!?!?!

Cherie Wheeler

Or was he desperately looking for a way to atone because he was actually deeply ashamed and therfore more gullible to Lori's lies? Was he sexually attracted to his niece and nephew so killing them removed his temptation? Would this lead him to treat their bodies the way he did? Awful to think of I know but all of this is.

Erica A. Zwick
>>71479735

Alex was not a pedophile. A pedophile is attracted to prepubescent children and would have no interest in a 15-year-old girl. He was however, a creep and a sick f*ck.

LauraK

How do you get ex-communicated twice from a church? In the LDS church, is that as extreme as it would be in another church or profession??

Prince Charmings Mom 2930

I was wondering too how he was ex communicated twice. I was wondering if Lauren might know the reasons as stated in the “LDS Playbook”. Thank heavens Debbie got out, I felt she was credible and appreciated your analysis.

Kathleen Miller

.you can be rebaptized if you confess to church leaders, show remorse and go through the process to do so. So he might of been rebaptized and went back to his ways. Ive never known anyone rebaptized again after 2 times. It makes me sick that Chad Daybell gave him a blessing that he was special and chosen. He was very evil.