DW DXD Remastered Chapter 15: A Return to Normal (Patreon)

The familiar night sky stretched above them, as it was the same clear, quiet, peaceful night that Issei remembered.

The contrast was almost surreal. No ruined houses or ruined streets. Just the soft, gentle rustling of leaves in the breeze, the dim glow of streetlights, and the distant hum of a quiet suburban town. The same park where Issei had left in what felt like days ago.

But it had only been thirty minutes.

Issei let out a shaky breath, his body protesting with every movement. Exhaustion weighed heavily on him, bruises throbbing beneath hastily wrapped bandages. His legs nearly gave out, but Yuuka was already there, gripping his arm and steadying him before he could fall.

"Damn." He muttered, rubbing his temple. "After everything, it feels weird to be back."

Though Yuuka and Misuki, however, were frozen in place, looking around with wide, disbelieving eyes as they took in the peaceful streets, the quiet houses, the complete absence of chaos.

“…This is it?” Yuuka asked, disbelief coloring her voice. “This is the future?”

Misuki furrowed her brows, scanning the empty streets and dimly lit houses with a curious gaze. "I expected something… different. It looks just like our world."

Issei let out a weak chuckle. "Yeah, Turns out 2008 isn’t that much of a dramatic jump forward from 1994."

Yuuka didn’t seem convinced and crossed her arms. "So… what do we do now?"

Misuki’s expression hardened as the reality of their situation settled in. “We don’t officially exist here. No records, no identification, no home. Even if this world looks the same, legally speaking, we’re nobodies.”

Issei hummed in thought, then shrugged. "For now, we’ll just go to my house and convince my parents to let you all stay."

Yuuka gave him a flat look. "And if they say no?"

Issei grinned without hesitation. "They won’t. My parents are good people."

Before Yuuka could argue, Sherri’s calm voice cut through the night air from the watch.

"If we have access to the internet, I can hack into the government system and fabricate legitimate identification for Yuuka, Misuki, Sakura, and Tamamo," The AI stated matter-of-factly. “As a superior artificial intelligence, I can ensure the documents are indistinguishable from authentic records.”

Misuki raised an eyebrow. "That would certainly help solve our logistical issues."

Yuuka sighed, rubbing her temple. "I guess that’s one problem solved, but we still have to explain everything to your parents. And I seriously doubt they’ll believe any of this.”

(There’s something far more important to worry about.) A deep rumble filled the air as Ddraig finally spoke up. (Tamamo should never reveal her divine power.) Causing everyone to look at the red gauntlet on Issei’s arm. (If she does, she will immediately alert the supernatural of her presence, and we won’t simply have to deal with a couple of magicians.)

Tamamo scoffed, waving a dismissive hand. "Oh, hush, you oversized lizard. I am a master of disguise!" 

Without hesitation, she activated her transformation and a faint glow surrounded her, and within seconds, her fox ears and tails vanished, leaving her looking completely human. Her traditional attire shifted into modern, stylish clothing, perfectly blending into the world around her.

Tamamo twirled in place, admiring her own work. "Ta-da~! A flawless disguise! No one will suspect a thing!"

Ddraig let out a long, exhausted sigh. (That’s not the issue. If a real deity senses your presence, especially Amaterasu, she could come investigate.)

Tamamo simply smirked. "And?"

(And there aren’t supposed to be two of her in this world,) Ddraig grumbled. "We do not need the literal Sun Goddess questioning why another version of herself is walking around. It could bring problems. A problem that, partner is not ready to face.)

Issei sighed. "Yeah, that sounds like a problem."

Tamamo, however, waved a hand dismissively. "Oh, relax, big guy! I can handle it."

(You’re being too reckless.) Ddraig scoffed.

Tamamo pouted. "And you’re too grumpy!"

Ddraig groaned. (Ughh. Why do I even try?)

Their bickering continued, and Yuuka rubbed her forehead in frustration before remembering something important.. "Wait…" She said suddenly, her eyes narrowing. "If we’re getting fake identities… what name will Tamamo be using?"

Tamamo grinned mischievously and smug. "Isn’t it obvious from this moment on… My name is Mizukame Hyoudou!"

A beat of silence.

Then—

"WHAT?!" Yuuka exploded as she spun toward Tamamo, her entire body twitching. "Why do you get to take Issei’s last name?!"

Tamamo, looking far too pleased, placed a hand on her hip and tilted her head smugly. "Because I’m his wife, of course!"

Yuuka twitched. "He never proposed to you!"

Tamamo waved a hand dismissively. "Minor details! In my heart, we’re already bound for eternity!"

Yuuka looked even angrier as she clenched her fists. "Fine! Then I’ll be taking Issei’s last name too!"

Misuki suddenly chuckled as a teasing glint appeared in her eyes. "Oh? But, Yuuka dear, you still haven’t gotten a proposal, and you’re already taking his last name? Should I expect grandchildren soon?"

Yuuka’s face turned bright red. "I-I… I’m not ready for that yet! We should go on more dates first!"

Misuki giggled. "Oh? So you do want to marry him someday?"

Yuuka covered her face with both hands. "Ugh, can we not talk about this right now?!"

Sakura, who was in deep thought, and had been watching the conversation unfold with wide eyes, suddenly tugged on Issei’s sleeve. "Can… Can I take your last name too?" She asked softly.

Issei smiled warmly, ruffling her hair. "Of course." He said, not thinking too deeply about the implications.

Sakura’s expression brightened as she held his sleeve a little tighter.

Ddraig, seeing that he was being ignored, sighed. (Regardless, just be careful, Tamamo.)

Tamamo rolled her eyes. "Yes, yes, ‘don’t reveal my power, don’t get caught by the other version of me,’ blah, blah, blah. I get it!"

Ddraig groaned. (Why do I even try?)

Enhance

With that settled, they began the slow trek toward Issei’s house.

Yuuka kept a firm grip on his arm, anchoring him as he focused on placing one foot in front of the other. Every step sent a dull, persistent ache rippling through his body, the aftermath of battles his body hadn’t fully caught up to yet. Still, he didn’t complain. Compared to what he’d endured before, this was manageable.

Tamamo, however, was not suffering in silence.

"Why am I carrying all the bags?" She whined, shifting the weight on her shoulders with an exaggerated pout. “This is cruelty. Utter cruelty.”

Yuuka smirked. "Because you’re the strongest one here. And Issei is in no shape to carry anything."

Tamamo gasped dramatically, placing a delicate hand over her chest as if struck. "But I'm a delicate and fragile wife!"

Misuki raised an unimpressed eyebrow. “You erased a squad of assassins and nearly killed a priest with cursed foxfire less than an hour ago.”

Tamamo huffed, flicking her hair. "Fine, but only because I’m a good wife!"

Issei sighed, shaking his head as they walked. "Somehow, I feel like I should be more concerned about this conversation."

Sakura stayed close at his side, her small hand clutching the sleeve of his jacket as if letting go might make everything disappear. After a moment, she tilted her head up, violet eyes wide with cautious curiosity.

“Are your parents… nice?” she asked softly.

Issei glanced down at her and smiled—warm, genuine, and certain. “They’re the best.”

Sakura’s grip tightened just a little.

As they moved through the quiet streets, Issei began to notice something.

People were staring as pedestrians slowed as they passed. Late-night walkers outright turned their heads. Even drivers idling at red lights leaned forward, eyes lingering far longer than social politeness allowed. It wasn’t subtle in the slightest. Some people outright stopped what they were doing to take in the sight of four absurdly beautiful women walking alongside a heavily injured guy.

But most of their eyes inevitably settled on Tamamo and he really couldn’t blame them.She practically glowed beneath the streetlights, pink hair shimmering with every step, her presence impossible to ignore. Even sealed and disguised, there was something about her, something divine, that made people’s eyes slide toward her whether they meant to or not.

Yuuka groaned, tugging her jacket tighter around herself. "Ugh. I feel like we’re being watched like we’re some kind of freak show."

Issei rubbed his temple, exhaustion dulling his usual filter. “What can I say? When people see beautiful girls, they have to look." He says unintentionally complementing the girls causing them to blush.

Yuuka’s step faltered for a brief second, her face flushing red before she quickly turned her head away. Misuki smirked knowingly, her eyes filled with motherly amusement and a woman's joyful expression. Tamamo’s eyes sparkled as they beamed at him, flashing a victorious grin. And Sakura immediately hid her face against his sleeve, her small hands tightening their grip.

A thick silence settled between them.

Issei blinked. "Wait… Did I say that out loud?"

"Yes, you did," Yuuka muttered, her ears turning pink, refusing to look at him.

Tamamo giggled behind her sleeve. "Mikon! Darling, if you wanted to shower me with compliments, you should say so more often! No need to be shy~!"

Yuuka groaned. "Ugh. Now she’s never going to let this go."

Misuki hummed thoughtfully. "Oh, but isn’t it refreshing? A young man who can openly appreciate beauty in its finest form~?"

Sakura peeked up at him, hesitating before softly asking, “You… really think I’m pretty too?”

Issei, embarrassed, felt his face heat up now. "I-I mean, yeah! Of course!"

Tamamo laughed brightly. “Excellent answer, Husband~!”

Yuuka groaned again, covering her face with one hand. "Can we just walk faster?"

Issei chuckled weakly as they continued on, unaware that for Sakura, those simple words had settled somewhere deep in her chest as it gave her more confidence.

—-----------------------

Standing before the familiar front door, Issei felt a strange, overwhelming sense of relief. After everything, after facing near-death battles, fighting legendary warriors, and traveling between worlds, he was finally at his regular old home.

But that relief was short-lived. Because now came the truly terrifying part, he had to explain all of this to his very human normal parents. And that was probably going to be the hardest battle yet. 

Issei swallowed, his injuries screaming in protest as he straightened just enough to lift his hand. Taking a steadying breath, he knocked.

A moment later, the door opened revealing Issei's mother, Miki Hyoudou, who blinked once in confusion. "Yes? Who is—" Then her eyes landed on Issei’s battered form and her breath hitched with her pupils shrinking in terror. 

"ISSEI?!" She practically flew out of the home, her hands gripping his shoulders with frantic strength as she scanned every visible injury. "What happened to you?! Are you okay?! Who did this?!” Her voice rose with each question. “GAROU! GET OVER HERE!"

From inside, a tired voice answered. "What is it, honey?" Garou Hyoudou stepped into view, rubbing his eyes after what was clearly a long day at work. Only for his face to pale as he saw his son. “…Son?” His voice went tight. “What the hell happened to you?!”

Issei chuckled weakly, already feeling the full force of parental panic bearing down on him. “H-Hey, Mom… Dad… don’t freak out. I promise, it looks worse than it is.”

"He is lying to you. A lot of his bones are broken." Yuuka said with a flat voice that cut through the air as she shot him a glare for making light of his injuries.

Issei sighed, slumping slightly. "Not helping, Yuuka."

Miki gasped sharply, her hands immediately fluttering over him again. “Broken bones?! That’s it, we’re going to the hospital right now!” She was already reaching for her phone.

Issei winced. “That’s—uh—that’s actually a really bad idea. I really… I really can’t explain how I got hurt.”

That stopped her as it made both parents pause as Garou’s brows furrowed as he exchanged a wary glance with his wife. Slowly, both of them turned their attention to the four unfamiliar girls standing just outside their doorway.

Garou’s stance shifted, protective and alert. “Who are they?”

Miki’s expression tightened, concern mixing with suspicion. “Issei… what exactly have you gotten yourself into?”

Issei let out a long, exhausted sigh, rubbing the back of his neck. “That’s… kind of why the explanation is complicated.” He shifted his weight and immediately regretted it as he winced. “Can we maybe sit down first? Standing is… getting really hard.”

That was all it took as Miki snapped into action, grabbing his arm. “Inside. Now.”

Garou stepped aside, ushering everyone in without another word. The door closed behind them with a quiet click.

—--------------------------------

Hyoudou Residence

Once everyone had settled into the living room, the tension became impossible to ignore.

Issei lay stretched out on the large couch, exhaustion finally winning out. Tamamo sat close at one side, far too comfortable for the situation, while Yuuka occupied the other, arms crossed but never letting him out of her peripheral vision. Misuki took a seat slightly apart, calm but attentive. Sakura hovered near the edge of the room, quiet and uncertain.

Across from them, Miki and Garou Hyoudou sat stiffly, their eyes never leaving their son as they were full of concern, worry and fear.

Finally with a sigh, Issei told them everything. About the Dimensional Watch choosing him. About being dragged into another world, one eerily similar to their own. About the Boosted Gear, the red gauntlet he’d been born with, gifted by God itself. About spending an entire week trapped in that other world. About magic, Servants, and the Holy Grail War. And finally about why he’d come home broken, bruised, and barely standing.

At first, his parents looked confused. Then skeptical. Then increasingly strained. With every sentence, their expressions twisted further, disbelief stacking atop disbelief like an unstable tower. By the time Issei finished, the room had fallen completely silent.

Garou was the first to move as he pinched the bridge of his nose and exhaled slowly, the sigh of a man trying very hard not to scream. "So let me get this straight. You're telling me that you, my perverted idiot son, who could barely pass math, somehow ended up in another world… fought in a magical war… was born with a dragon in your soul… and now you're back with four girls who also came from that world?"

Miki blinked rapidly. Once. Twice. Then she leaned forward, pressing the back of her hand against Issei’s forehead. “Are you feeling warm?” she asked urgently. “Do you have a fever? Did you hit your head? I can get ice—”

Issei groaned, dragging a hand down his face. “I knew this was gonna be hard to explain.”

Yuuka leaned closer and muttered under her breath. "I could've told you that."

Tamamo, however, let out a dramatic sigh and stood up, flipping her hair. “Well~,” she said cheerfully, “I suppose we’ve reached the point where words alone won’t suffice.”

Before anyone could stop her, she dropped her illusion. Fox ears burst free from her pink hair, and a single golden tail swayed lazily behind her, shimmering under the living room lights.

This caused Miki and Garou to freeze as their eyes widened.

And then before they could completely lose their minds, Sherri and Ddraig spoke from both his arms.

Sherri’s calm, mechanical voice spoke from Issei’s right arm. "Good evening, Hyoudou-san. I am Sherri, an artificial intelligence integrated into the Dimensional Watch currently bonded to your son.”

Then Ddraig’s deep, rumbling voice followed from the left. (And I am the Red Dragon Emperor, Ddraig.)

Miki and Garou stared.

Then, at the exact same time, they fainted. Thankfully, they collapsed back into their chairs instead of the floor.

Yuuka and Misuki both sweatdropped at a familiar scene.

Yuuka muttered, "…Déjà vu."

Misuki sighed, crossing her arms. "Well, this is familiar."

Tamamo giggled behind her sleeve. "Hehehe~! They handled that about as well as I expected!"

"Mom! Dad!" Issei fretted and panicked, trying to move toward them. That was a mistake as his battered body betrayed him. 

The moment he put weight on his legs, pain shot through him like lightning. “Gah—!” His legs gave out, and he slid unceremoniously off the couch, landing on the floor with a dull thud. “Ow…”

For a moment, there was silence.

Then Yuuka pinched the bridge of her nose. “You absolute idiot.”

Tamamo gasped dramatically. “Husband! You mustn’t overexert yourself! If you needed help, you should’ve collapsed into my arms~!”

Misuki chuckled softly. "Well, at least we know he still has the energy to panic."

Sakura tugged gently on Misuki’s sleeve, eyes wide. “A-Are… are they going to be okay?”

Misuki glanced at the unconscious parents, then nodded. “They’ll be fine. Just… processing.”

Still sprawled on the floor, Issei stared up at the ceiling, utterly drained. “…This is not how I wanted tonight to go.”

—-------------------------------

Before Miki and Garou had the chance to wake up—and inevitably faint all over again, Tamamo moved with decisive speed.

With a graceful sweep of her hand, she began weaving Boundary Fields around the house. Invisible lines of power sank into the walls, the floors, the very foundation itself. Sigils flickered briefly in the air before fading from sight, leaving behind a layered network of concealment and reinforcement.

Even without drawing on her full divine authority, Tamamo’s magecraft was more than sufficient.

The house vanished from supernatural perception, wrapped in wards designed to mislead, dampen, and outright reject prying senses. No wandering spirits, curious magicians, or opportunistic supernatural beings sniffing around the sudden spike in power, would be able to sense them. To the outside world, the Hyoudou residence was now utterly mundane, quiet, forgettable, and invisible.

At the same time, the barriers reinforced the structure itself. Walls strengthened. Windows hardened. The foundation was anchored. After what had happened to the Hana’s home, she wasn't willing to take chances.

Tamamo exhaled softly once she finished, tails swaying with quiet satisfaction. “Much better~,” She murmured. “Now no one will disturb us.”

But she wasn’t done yet as her gaze softened as she looked down at Issei. Healing him came next.

She knelt beside him, the room dimming as a gentle golden glow bloomed from her hands. Magic pulsed rhythmically from her fingertips, warm and soothing, flowing into his battered body. The pain dulled first—then the deeper damage followed.

Tamamo worked patiently, her expression unusually focused, almost reverent.

Meanwhile, Misuki quietly excused herself and headed to the kitchen to prepare some tea for the family. 

"Haaah… this is slower than I expected," Tamamo muttered, her brow furrowing as golden light pulsed steadily from her hands.

Issei, sprawled across the couch and barely holding himself together, blinked up at her. “Slower? From my perspective, this feels like a full-on miracle.”

Yuuka crossed her arms, clearly unimpressed. “Why is it taking so long?”

Sherri’s voice chimed in from the Dimensional Watch, calm and precise. "Tamamo and I are no longer connected to the Holy Grail System. The Grail supplied a finite but vast amount of magical energy to keep the Servants functional, but now that link is gone. While all my previous core abilities still function, I have lost my connection to the Root, I am no longer all-knowing."

That made everyone pause.

Issei turned his head slightly, frowning. “Wait… you’re saying you don’t know everything anymore?”

Sherri hummed. "Correct. I still retain extensive knowledge, but I can no longer process infinite possibilities as I once did, while I was connected to the root. I am, for lack of a better term, limited now."

Issei frowned. "Will you be able to reconnect if we go back to that world?"

“Possibly,” Sherri answered. “There are too many variables to confirm.”

Tamamo sighed theatrically, her ears twitching. "So troublesome! But don’t worry, darling,even without that silly Grail, I am more than capable of healing you.”

Issei gave her a small smile. "I never doubted you."

He tried to sit up, only for Yuuka to smack him on the head.

"Ow—! What was that for?!" Issei yelped.

Yuuka glared daggers at him and scowled. "For being a stubborn idiot. Stop trying to act tough and trying to get up when you're barely able to move!"

Issei groaned, rubbing his forehead. "I'm fine—!"

Smack.

"You're NOT fine!"

Misuki chuckled as she came back with the tea, shaking her head as she gave a cup to each of them. "Haven’t you learned by now, Issei? You can’t win against a worried woman."

Tamamo giggled softly. "Indeed~! A wife must take care of her husband, after all!"

Yuuka muttered under her breath, "He better not enjoy this too much."

Issei sighed but then glanced at Tamamo. "What about you?" He asked, his voice quieter. "You’re not getting support from the Grail anymore. Are you… okay?"

Tamamo froze for a fraction of a second—then her face brightened. "Mikon~! My dear husband is worrying about me! How sweet!" She then placed a hand proudly on her bountiful chest. "But fret not! Your world is overflowing with magic! Compared to my own world, this place is practically a paradise. So even though you no longer have Command Seals, our connection is just as strong as I can still get more power from you."

“Ehh?” Issei blinks and soon looks at his right hand, noticing that she is right. The red Command Seals were gone. ‘Oh well.’ He didn’t feel panicked. If anything… relieved. He never liked the idea of needing a brand to symbolize their connection. Their bond didn’t need such proof.

Ddraig’s deep voice rumbled from the Boosted Gear. (That is because the Age of Gods has not ended in this world. Unlike Tamamo’s world, where the gods have faded or left, they still walk the Earth here. While their influence has waned, they remain. That is why she can still exist without issue.)

A moment of silence followed.

Yuuka furrowed her brows. "Wait. So you’re saying… gods are still around?"

Ddraig let out a low, amused chuckle. (Indeed.)

Tamamo smirked. "Which means if I ever do need a boost of power, I can just steal some faith from the local deities! Ufufu~!"

Issei groaned immediately. “Please don’t start a divine war in my backyard.”

Tamamo pouted. "Fine, fine~! But only because my darling asked so nicely!"

Issei exhaled as Tamamo resumed her work, the warmth easing his pain bit by bit. It was… a lot to take in.

Enhance

Then his parents woke up.

"GAH—!"

"HUH—?!"

Both Miki and Garou Hyoudou shot upright in their chairs, eyes wide, breath hitching as adrenaline surged through them.

Miki clutched her chest, staring straight at the fox-eared woman kneeling beside her son. “It wasn’t a dream,” she whispered hoarsely. “It wasn’t a dream!”

Garou rubbed the back of his head, groaning as he took in the scene. The fox girl Tamamo, Issei covered in bandages, Yuuka, Misuki and the little girl Sakura. His gaze then sharpened as he accepted everything his son said.

 “…Alright, son,” he said slowly, voice low and serious. “Let me get this straight. You’re telling me you went to another world, were born with a magic gauntlet, fought in some kind of war, and came back with four girls?”

Issei opened his mouth. “Dad, it’s not—”

But then Tamamo proudly stepped forward, puffing out her chest and a radiant smile. “Actually~ I am his wife!”

The situation immediately got worse.

Miki whipped her head toward Issei, eyes burning with intensity. "YOU GOT MARRIED?! WITHOUT TELLING US?!"

Issei visibly shrank. “Mom, wait—!”

Miki’s attention snapped to Tamamo, eyes blazing as she assessed her from head to toe—ears, tails, beauty, confidence.

Tamamo blinked. "Oh my~?"

Before anyone could react, Miki grabbed Tamamo by the wrist and pulled her aside. "You. Sit. Now."

Tamamo giggled, completely unbothered, gracefully taking a seat across from her and folding her hands on her lap. “Oho! How bold, Mother-in-law! Already requesting private time with your precious daughter-in-law? My, my!”

Miki ignored the comment, leaning forward with deadly calm as her eyes sharpened. "I have questions. You have answers.”

Tamamo beamed. “Naturally~!”

“First question,” Miki said, eyes narrowing. “How long have you been married?”

Tamamo tapped her chin thoughtfully. “Ara! Technically speaking, we were bound by contract the very moment my darling summoned me into his life!”

Miki squinted. "Contract?! What kind of shady marriage is that?!"

Tamamo smirked. "The kind that is sealed with absolute loyalty~!"

Miki sighed, already feeling a headache coming on, then looked up again, gaze sharp but searching "Fine, fine. Next question. Do you love my son?"

Tamamo paused. Her playful smirk faded, just a little. When she smiled again, it was gentle, honest and unmistakably sincere. "With all my heart."

A beat of silence.

Miki stared.

Garou stared.

Issei stopped breathing.

Yuuka twitched.

Miki then leaned back in her chair, tapping her chin thoughtfully. “Alright,” She said at last, nodding to herself. “Next question—WHEN AM I GETTING GRANDKIDS?!”

“MOM?!” Issei choked, nearly rolling off the couch. ‘Can she even have kids?!’ He internally panicked, his eyes darting to Tamamo. ‘She’s technically a spirit!’

Tamamo, meanwhile, clasped her hands together, eyes sparkling with delight. “Oh my! You truly are a wonderful mother-in-law! So eager for grandchildren already? Ufufu! I shall work very hard to fulfill your wishes!”

"LIKE HELL YOU WILL!"

Everyone snapped toward Yuuka. She wasn’t just red, she was boiling in anger. 

Yuuka jabbed a finger straight at Tamamo. “I’m his actual first girlfriend! If anyone gets interrogated about grandkids, it should be me!”

Misuki watched from the side, lips curling into an amused smile. “Oh?” She said lightly. “Does that mean you’re planning on giving Miki grandchildren someday?”

Yuuka froze with her entire body locked up like someone had pulled the plug. "W-Wha—?! I-I didn’t say that! I just meant—! We should at least—! D-Don’t twist my words, Mom!"

Misuki chuckled softly. “My, my~. How flustered.”

Miki nodded with solemn approval. “Hmm. Good. That means we have two candidates.”

“STOP TALKING LIKE I’M A BROODMARE!” Yuuka screamed, burying her face in her hands in embarrassment.

And then at that moment, Sakura made a decision as tugged on Issei’s sleeve.

"Yes, Sakura?" Issei asked instinctively.

Everyone turned toward her. For the first time since the chaos began, Miki and Garou truly noticed the small girl clinging to their son, watching the child’s resolute eyes, full of determination.

The small girl then clung to him, hugging his arm. And then bravely announced something that would change their relationship forever. "I’m his daughter."

The room went silent.

Miki gasped. "WAIT, WHAT?!"

Garou leaned forward, eyes lighting up with pure delight. “Son,” he said proudly, “you work fast.”

Issei held up his hands, panicking. "WAIT, NO! THAT’S NOT—"

Sakura nuzzled closer into his arm. “You saved me. You protected me.” She looked up at him, eyes shining. “That makes you my Papa, right?”

Miki’s mouth opened and closed. Her brain was short-circuiting. Then. "OH MY GOD, I HAVE A GRANDDAUGHTER!"

Issei facepalmed so hard it probably shaved a year off his lifespan.

Garou burst out laughing with tears in his eyes. "Hahaha! I take it all back, son! I thought you'd end up a hopeless pervert, but you actually managed to bring home a whole family!"

Miki immediately grabbed Yuuka and Tamamo by the shoulders with terrifying strength. “You two,” she said firmly. “I expect more grandkids. Soon.”

“STOP IT!” Yuuka shrieked.

Tamamo giggled sweetly. “Fufu~! I look forward to fulfilling my duty as the first wife!”

Yuuka growled. "DON’T SAY THAT!"

Issei lay back against the couch cushions, staring up at the ceiling with the dead-eyed calm of a man who had lost control of his life. “…I just wanted to go to sleep.”

—-----------------------------------------

The Hyoudou household had never been known for its quiet atmosphere. But tonight was something else entirely.

Inside the house, chaos reigned supreme, Miki was still aggressively interrogating Tamamo and Yuuka about future grandchildren, Garou was laughing like a man who’d just won the lottery and discovered he had insider information, and Issei… was silently praying to every god he knew for mercy.

And then a soft rustling came from outside.

From the fence separating the Hyoudou home from the neighboring house. Unbeknownst to the family, a pair of curious eyes peeked over the wooden boards.

Mrs. Sasaki, their next-door neighbor, late fifties, retired homemaker, and undisputed queen of neighborhood gossip, had stepped outside for some fresh air. What she got instead was front-row seats to utter madness.

From inside the Hyoudou home, voices rang out—loud, unfiltered, and horrifyingly clear.

“—WHEN AM I GETTING GRANDKIDS?!”

“MOM!”

“OH MY GOD, I HAVE A GRANDDAUGHTER!”

“Son, you work fast!”

“STOP TALKING LIKE I’M A BROODMARE!”

“Fufu! I shall work very hard to fulfill your wishes, Mother-in-law!”

Mrs. Sasaki froze as her jaw slowly unhinged and her brain stalled.

She stared at the Hyoudou house like it had just grown extra floors, summoned demons, and rewritten the laws of reality.

“…I don’t even wanna know.” Without another word, she backed away from the fence.

Slowly, carefully as if retreating from a wild animal.

Then she turned on her heel and marched straight back inside her house, slamming the door shut behind her.

Inside, she locked it. Just in case. Whatever was happening next door… That was none of her business.

Done. Tell me what you think.