Metal and Magic (Ch. 39) (Patreon)

( Every character in this story is a legal adult over the age of 18 )

Metal and Magic

Chapter 39

“So let me make sure I’ve got this right,” Harry said, leaning back in the office chair and propping a foot on the edge of the coffee table. “Your father stripped your powers, banished you here, and you can’t get back unless you recover your hammer? And this all happened because you … what, picked a fight with the Frost Giants?”

Thor let out a deep sigh and ran a hand through his blond hair. “It was not a mere fight. I sought to punish their treachery and show them that the sons of Odin are not to be trifled with. But my father …” He looked away with an expression of shame and anger. “He deemed me reckless, immature, and unworthy.”

Harry tried not to smile at the melodrama. “He sounds like a tough parent. My uncle once locked me in the cupboard for a month, but at least he didn’t send me to another planet.”

Thor blinked, then gave a booming laugh. “Truly, you have known the sting of exile as well! Perhaps that is why you are so understanding, Harrold the Potter.”

“Maybe,” Harry said. He glanced at his phone, debating whether to call Coulson now or wait until Jane returned. Darcy was still snoring in the other room, and the last thing he wanted was her stumbling in on a top-secret conversation. “So, this hammer. If you get it back, what happens?”

Thor’s eyes sparkled. “I will regain my strength, my birthright. I shall return to Asgard and reclaim my place at my father’s side.”

“Right.” Harry considered this, thinking through his options. Thor didn’t seem dangerous … at least, not in the homicidal sense, but Harry had the sense that if he didn’t help, the big guy would just wander around town until someone called the police and locked him in a looney bin. 

“Where’s the hammer now?” he asked, feigning ignorance. 

Thor frowned. “It fell to this realm with me, but I was subdued upon arrival. I have been unable to search for it.”

Harry smirked. “Jane said she ran you down with her vehicle more than once.”

Thor looked confused, but nodded. “The metal beast seems determined to keep it from me. I do not know why.”

Harry shook his head. “I might be able to get you to your hammer.”

Thor stood up so fast he nearly toppled the coffee table. “Then what are we waiting for? Let us depart at once!”

Harry held up a hand. “Whoa, hang on. I need to check in with my … contacts. And you may want to finish eating before your journey.

”

Thor hesitated, then nodded. “You are wise, Harrold the Potter. I will wait and regain my strength.” Thor then went back to the cupboards and ransacked them for any tasty treat he could find. 

Harry stepped into the hallway and dialed Coulson’s number. It only rang once. The man must have been lurking by the phone.

“Potter. Report.”

“I’m with the new arrival,” Harry said quietly. He kept an eye on the door to make sure Thor wasn’t eavesdropping. “He’s, uh, pretty much what you’d expect. Big, loud, and hungry. But thankfully, he’s not violent. And he really wants his hammer back.”

Coulson didn’t miss a beat. “Can he lift it?”

Harry grinned. “He wants to try. I figure it’s the only way you’ll get any answers out of him.”

“Interesting.” Coulson sounded pleased. “The site is secure, but we’re seeing anomalous energy spikes. If you can get him to the perimeter, we’ll let him attempt retrieval … under supervision.”

“Got it. I’ll bring him over.”

Coulson paused, then added, “And Potter? Keep a close eye on him. We don’t know what he’s truly capable of.”

Harry hung up and turned to see Thor looming in the doorway, looking impatient but hopeful. He had a bag of chocolate chip cookies in his hand. “Is it time?” he asked.

“Yeah. Let’s go.”

Thor clapped Harry on the back hard enough to rattle his teeth. “You are a true friend, Harrold the Potter! When my greatness has been restored, I shall sing songs of your valor in the halls of Asgard!”

“Let’s just get through today first,” Harry said, rubbing his shoulder.

He wrote a quick note for Darcy, in case she woke up from her drunken stupor. He stuck it to the fridge with a novelty magnet shaped like a moose. Thor was already at the door, scanning the parking lot with the intensity of a wolf on the hunt. Harry steered him toward his Jeep.

“Ah! A fine chariot,” Thor declared as he climbed in. 

As they took off, Harry pulled out his phone and dialed Jane before putting it on speakerphone. “Jane?” Harry said when she picked up. “Sorry for the call. I’m taking Thor out for a little field trip.”

“Field trip? Where?” Jane asked, sounding slightly panicked. 

Harry could almost see her pinching the bridge of her nose. “There’s a government outpost on the edge of town,” he said. “Thor seems convinced his hammer is there, and I think it might be worth checking out. If nothing else, it gets him out of the lab before he eats you out of house and home.”

On her end, Jane was silent for a second. “Where’s Darcy?” she finally asked.

Harry stifled a laugh. “Darcy’s fine. She’s sleeping off a heroic amount of tequila on the couch in the back room. I covered her with a blanket. She probably won’t be conscious any time soon.”

Jane groaned loud enough for both of them to hear. “I told her not to drink with strangers. She’s liable to get herself killed.”

Thor leaned down to the phone and boomed, “Fair Jane! Fear not! The Lady Darcy is watched over by Harold the Potter, who is most vigilant and strong.”

Harry shot him a look, then added, “See? You’ve got two bodyguards watching out for her.”

Jane snorted. “Try not to let him get arrested, okay? I have a meeting this afternoon, and I’d like not to have to leave early and bail you idiots out of jail.”

“We’ll be back before you know it. If you need me, just call. I’ll keep an eye on him,” Harry promised. 

He ended the call, and Thor immediately started scanning the horizon, as if trying to sense the hammer’s location. Jane’s phone call had left him feeling oddly responsible for both women, and for Thor, too. He felt like the babysitter in some strange sitcom.

Thor spent the first minute of the drive marveling over the radio controls. He switched between stations at random and was delighted to discover the music of this world. The drive was just over an hour, but it felt longer with Thor in the passenger seat. He had never heard of seat belts, air conditioning, or the concept of stop signs. Every time Harry slowed for a red light, Thor would lean out the window and call to passing pedestrians, as if they were personal acquaintances.

After a few miles, Thor settled in, and the ride grew less frantic. He was surprisingly easy to talk to. He asked Harry about his family, his work, and whether all mortals wore “such constricting garments.” When Harry explained that most people preferred not to walk around in animal skins and fur pelts, Thor just shrugged.

“On Asgard, no one cares what you wear. But here, you mortals judge by the color of your cloth and the cut of your boots.”

Harry laughed. “You’re not wrong.”

They passed into open desert, and Thor pointed off in the distance. “That is where my hammer lies. I can feel its pull, even now.”

Harry glanced at him. “Does it talk to you, or is this just a sense thing?”

“It speaks to those who are worthy,” Thor said, growing serious. “And only the worthy can wield it.”

Harry didn’t answer. He had met a lot of magical artifacts in his time, and most of them had a twisted sense of humor. He wondered what, exactly, Thor’s hammer was looking for in a bearer. He kept his thoughts to himself and focused on the road.

Thor rested his head back against the seat and closed his eyes. For a moment, Harry considered what it would be like to be banished, powerless, and stuck in a world you barely understood. He supposed it wasn’t so different from what he went through.

He was about to ask Thor more about his home when his phone buzzed with a text. It was from Coulson. ‘Approaching site. All clear. Overwatch active. Proceed with caution.’

Harry thumbed a quick reply and told Thor, “We’re almost there. Try not to punch anyone, okay?”

Thor grinned. “I cannot promise, but I shall try.”

They rolled to a stop at the edge of the fenced-off site. Two black SUVs were parked near the entrance, and a dense thicket of security cameras bristled from every pole. Harry spoke with the guard, and after a moment to confirm it with Coulson, the gate opened up and let them in. Harry drove in and parked near the other vehicles. 

Harry killed the engine and turned to Thor. “Let’s not do anything crazy. They’re expecting us.”

Thor nodded, but there was a light in his eyes. Harry could tell he hadn’t been this close to his hammer in days. They stepped out of the Jeep and started toward the main structure. A team of agents watched their approach with silent, twitchy professionalism. Harry flashed the badge Coulson had given him. A moment later, Coulson himself emerged from one of the SUVs, looking more rumpled than usual.

Harry raised a hand in greeting. “Hey, boss. I brought you a guest.”

Coulson stepped forward to meet them, and his eyes moved over Thor with a mixture of curiosity and caution. Harry made the introductions, and Thor immediately beamed at Coulson, sizing him up with the kind of frank appraisal that made even seasoned agents shift uncomfortably.

“Son of Coul!” Thor declared, clapping Coulson on the shoulder hard enough to make him wobble. “I am told you have kept my hammer safe from the cunning of mortals. For this, you have my thanks.”

Coulson barely winced at the grip, and he managed a thin smile. “We do our best, Mr. Thor. This way, please.”

SHIELD had set up their operations in the building at the center of the impact site. The whole structure looked temporary, but the security was tight. Agents in tactical gear flanked every hallway, keeping a watchful eye over everything. As they were led through the building, Thor looked around with open fascination, peering at computers and poking at the occasional blinking panel. Harry had to nudge him twice to keep pace. The agents watched Thor with sidelong glances. One hand was always hovering near their sidearms.

Coulson guided them down a corridor lined with thin plastic sheeting. They stopped in front of a pair of reinforced doors that were guarded by two agents in full tactical vests. Coulson keyed in a code, then placed his palm on a scanner. “We’ve kept it undisturbed,” he said to Thor.

The doors slid open with a hydraulic hiss, revealing a chamber built around a solitary object. Thor’s hammer was embedded in a block of sandstone at the center of the room. Floodlights illuminated it from every angle, and a ring of cameras surveilled the scene. No fewer than a dozen sensors took readings from nearby pedestals. Each one was trained on the hammer, constantly collecting data. 

Thor strode forward, and he brightened as the hammer came into view. “Ah, Mjölnir, my old friend,” he said with genuine emotion. He didn’t hesitate. He marched right up to the hammer, planted his feet, and reached for the handle.

The entire SHIELD team tensed. Harry realized that half of them probably expected the hammer to explode on the spot. Thor wrapped his fingers around the grip and pulled. The hammer didn’t even twitch.

He tried again, bending his knees and twisting his body. He let out a loud grunt, but it didn’t even budge. Thor released the handle and stood back, searching the hammer for any reason why it wouldn’t let him pick it up. He muttered something in a language Harry didn’t recognize, then set his jaw and gripped the handle once more. He strained until the cords stood out on his neck and his face flushed red, but the hammer stayed rooted to the ground. After a minute of this, he staggered back with his chest heaving.

It was as if someone had reached into him and plucked out his heart. All the confidence drained out of his face, and he looked almost … small.

“Is this another of my father’s cruel tricks?” Thor asked the air. He dropped to one knee and pressed his forehead to the tip of the hammer’s handle, as if seeking answers from the thing itself.

Coulson looked to Harry, who shrugged. “He’s been talking about it nonstop. From what I can tell, the hammer only works if it thinks you deserve it.”

Coulson arched an eyebrow. “And what makes you say that?”

Harry nodded toward Thor. “He’s not faking it. Whatever power this thing runs on, it’s got its own rules.” Harry then quickly explained to him everything that Thor had told him about his father, the Frost Giants, and his banishment to this “realm”. 

Thor’s shoulders shook. He tried again and again, sometimes whispering to the hammer, and sometimes swearing at it. He spent so long at it that the agents began to shift their feet, growing restless. Finally, after a last desperate heave, he slumped to the floor, defeated.

Harry broke the silence. “We should probably give him a moment.”

Coulson frowned, but inclined his head. They stepped out into the hallway, leaving two guards posted at the door. Thor’s ragged breathing still carried to them.

“Is he going to be a problem?” Coulson asked quietly.

“No. He’s an easygoing guy who’s more curious than anything,” Harry answered. 

Coulson chewed on this for a moment, then said, “If what you said is true, then he’s the kind of guy we could use on our side. For now, he’s your responsibility. Keep an eye on him.”

“I’ll handle it,” Harry said. “I’ll make sure he stays out of trouble.”

Coulson seemed to accept this. He gave Harry a look like he was about to say something more, but he just nodded and returned to the control room. Harry followed him in. Thor sat cross-legged on the floor, staring at the hammer. His face was drawn tight with frustration. He glanced up as Harry entered.

“Did you know that the All-Father once told me this weapon was a gift for those who would protect, not conquer? I thought it meant I was destined to lead.” He touched the hammer’s handle again, but this time with a gentleness that bordered on reverence. “Now I wonder if I ever understood it at all.”

Harry hesitated, then sat down beside him. “I wouldn’t worry too much. I’m sure the time will come when the hammer will answer your call once again.”

Thor looked at him, surprised, then barked a single, hoarse laugh. “You are a peculiar man, Harrold the Potter.”

“That’s the story of my life,” Harry agreed.

Thor stood, dusted himself off, and squared his shoulders. He looked almost regal again, but there was a humility in his eyes that hadn’t been there before. Coulson returned with an easy smile. “You can try again when you’re ready. The hammer’s not going anywhere.”

Thor nodded. He gripped Coulson’s shoulder and held it for a moment. “You have my thanks, Son of Coul. I will not forget your honor.”

Coulson blinked, but nodded back. “Is there anything you need?” he asked Harry. 

Harry shook his head. “I’ll take him back to town. I’m going to be sticking around for a while.” Coulson nodded, understanding what he was saying. 

The agents let them out with something like relief. Thor was silent on the walk back, but when they reached the Jeep, he stopped and turned to look at the desert sky. “I do not understand this world,” Thor said, almost as if he were talking to himself. “But perhaps it is time I learned.”

Harry clapped him on the back. “Don’t worry, Thor. You’re among friends.”

He wasn’t sure if Thor understood, but the big man smiled and climbed into the passenger seat. Harry started the Jeep and pointed them toward Jane’s lab.

Metal and Magic 

The Jeep pulled up outside Jane’s lab as the afternoon sun shined brightly overhead. Jane was already outside with her arms wrapped tight around her to protect herself from the wind. Her face was pinched with worry. When she saw the Jeep, she hurried down the steps and nearly collided with Harry as he swung himself out of the driver's seat.

“Where did you guys go?” she asked. 

“We went to try and get Thor his hammer back,” Harry told her as he shut the Jeep’s door. 

“Did you find it?” Jane asked as she looked from Harry to Thor.

“I did,” Thor said in a solemn voice. “But I could not claim it. The hammer remains beyond my grasp.” He looked away with his jaw set, and Jane seemed at a loss for words.

Darcy appeared behind Jane, holding a nearly empty bottle of Gatorade. She looked paler than usual and a little wild-eyed, and her hair was doing things Harry hadn’t thought possible for hair to do. “You guys,” she said in a gravelly voice. “I think midday drinking should be strictly outlawed.” She groaned and rubbed her temple. 

Harry popped his door and rummaged in his satchel for a moment. He handed Darcy a bottle of his Hangover Cure. “Take this,” he said. “You’ll feel better.”

Darcy didn’t even bother to ask what it was. She immediately recognized the packaging. She cracked it open and threw the whole thing back like a tequila shot. She closed her eyes for a second and sighed in relief. “That’s the stuff,” she said as it worked its magic. 

He turned to Jane. “How was your meeting?”

Jane ran a hand through her hair. “Not great. Without my research, I have no proof of the anomaly. I can’t believe they took it away. The readings were off the charts,” she said.

“I believe the anomaly was caused by the Bifrost,” Thor said, looking up at the sky as if the answer might be written there. “Or perhaps by the hammer itself. Such things are difficult to predict in your world.”

“We can talk more inside,” Jane said with a quick glance at Harry. She tried to be subtle about the fact that she wanted Harry to stick around a bit longer. “You should both come in. Erik’s making soup.”

Harry glanced at Thor, who was already heading up the steps. Jane led the way into the lab, and Darcy followed, pausing only to throw Harry a grateful thumbs-up before she disappeared inside.

Inside the lab, Erik sat hunched over a tablet with a stylus in hand, drawing lines across a strange diagram. He looked up as they entered. “You’re back,” he said in a dry voice.

Jane introduced Thor as she moved to the kitchen area and started dishing up soup. “This is Thor,” she said. “He’s, uh, the guy I ran over … twice.”

Thor gave Erik a nod. “You must be the wise one,” he said. “Jane speaks highly of your intellect.”

Erik didn’t look away from Thor, measuring him with a scientist’s skepticism. “She also tells me you think you’re some kind of lost god.”

“Not lost,” Thor said. “Merely misplaced.”

Darcy flopped onto the couch and patted the spot next to her. Harry dropped down next to her, and she scooted over until she was practically leaning on him. 

“I rented a house down the street,” Harry said casually to Jane. “It’s big enough that Thor can stay with me until we figure everything out.” In reality, Harry had called Coulson during the ride home. Harry asked him to find him a place to stay in town. He called back twenty minutes later and said he'd found a nice, furnished house for rent. He paid a year in advance, so Harry could move in immediately. 

Jane blinked in surprise. “You’re staying here?”

Harry nodded. “I figured that I should stick around for a while.”

Darcy squealed and hugged Harry’s arm, pushing it deep between her pillowy breasts. 

Thor drifted toward the window and gazed out at the road. “I thank you, Harrold. Your realm’s hospitality has been most generous.”

Jane handed thick bowls of soup around and sat down next to Harry. “So, you couldn’t lift the hammer,” she said to Thor while keeping her voice gentle.

Thor shook his head. “I am not worthy. That is what the hammer told me.”

The silence was awkward for a moment, but then Darcy filled it. “It’s okay, dude,” she said. “I once failed my driver’s test three times. Sometimes stuff just doesn’t work out the first go.”

Harry grinned at her. “And you turned out fine.”

“Yeah, but I still don’t have a license,” Darcy said with a smile.

Erik sipped his soup, but his eyes never left Thor. “If you’re no longer the god of thunder, then what are you now?” he asked. 

Thor thought about it. “I am still myself,” he said at last. “Just less.”

Harry thought he saw something flicker in Jane’s expression. It was sympathy, maybe, or just the cold, hard reality of seeing a hero crash back to Earth. He was reminded of a hundred conversations he’d had with people who used to think he was something special, only to find out he was just a guy, after all. It wasn’t a bad thing, but it always stung just a bit.

They fell into an easy rhythm of eating and talking about non-life-changing things. Harry fielded questions from Darcy about the rented house. Jane listened and occasionally asked Harry about his life in England, and how he ended up working with Tony Stark. 

“Was it hard?” Jane asked after a while. “Being away from home?”

Harry shrugged. “After a while, home is wherever you hang your hat. I’ve made some wonderful new friends.”

Thor finished his soup and set the bowl down with a solid thunk. “I would like to see this home of yours, Harrold. And perhaps learn more of your world, if you are willing.”

“Anytime,” Harry said, and meant it.

Darcy was already on her feet. “Road trip,” she announced, and Jane rolled her eyes but got up to fetch her shoes anyway.

Erik stayed behind in the lab. “I’ll mind the data,” he said, pointedly.

Jane led the way back outside, where the sky had turned a purplish pink. Thor trailed behind them. His mood was lighter than before, and Darcy huddled close to Harry, asking if he had any more hangover cures in his bag. Harry promised to provide as many as she needed. 

They walked the few blocks down to the rented house, which looked pretty much like every other house in the development. It was a boxy two-story house with a bland stucco finish. The small front yard was mostly a rock garden with desert flora. There was a key under the planter, just like Coulson had promised, and the lights flickered on when Jane hit the switch.

Inside, there were three bedrooms, a spacious living room, and a kitchen that he would stock with food later that night. Thankfully, it already had a bit of food. He guessed that Coulson had a SHIELD agent rush over and buy the necessities while Harry was traveling back to the lab from the desert. Harry claimed the master bedroom, but it didn’t really matter since all three were roughly the same size, and they each had an ensuite bathroom. Darcy made herself at home on the couch and started channel surfing, while Jane went to check out the backyard.

Thor wandered around, running his hands over the unfamiliar appliances and occasionally asking Harry what purpose each gadget served. Harry showed him how to use the shower and the television while Darcy jokingly set up Thor’s very first email account, which they all agreed was equal parts hilarious and terrifying.

When they all regrouped in the living room, Darcy was already halfway through a bowl of Lucky Charms, and Jane was curled up with a mug of tea. Thor sat on the floor, cross-legged, watching the TV with interest. 

“Is this what people in your realm do to pass the evening?” he asked.

“Pretty much,” Harry said, and Darcy nodded.

“Sometimes we eat popcorn and watch movies,” she added.

Thor brightened. “I would like to see these movies.”

Darcy put on a superhero film, which everyone agreed was a bit on the nose, but it delighted Thor to no end. He asked a thousand questions, most of which Harry tried to answer with a straight face, and by the end of the night, Thor was quoting lines from the movie. 

Jane watched it all, occasionally catching Harry’s eye. She seemed lighter, too, as if the weirdness of the past few days had finally switched over into something almost normal.

When the movie ended, Jane suggested they go home to get some sleep. Darcy yawned and stood up, and Thor retired to his room, thanking Harry again for the hospitality.

As Harry escorted the women back to the lab, Jane lightly grabbed his forearm. “Hey, Harry?”

He looked down at her. “Yeah?”

She smiled up at him. “I’m glad you’re here.”

He smiled back. “Me too.”

“I’m glad too!” Darcy chimed in, hugging his arm to her chest again. Harry chuckled and slipped an arm around her shoulder. Darcy giggled and snuggled in closer.