Dokeshi March: Chapter 8 (Patreon)

Chapter 8

The Vassal facing them was tall and skinny, and he looked as if he was wearing stilts under his pants. How the two of them hadn’t noticed his bright green hair poking up over the crowd was a mystery. The clear stone at the end of his short metal-banded wooden scepter was putting out a faint purple glow that seemed to pulse with his heartbeat. The pace seemed to increase as Grant took a step forward to face him.

“You know, it’s lucky I found you instead of Cuddles.” The clown moved the scepter across his body, pointing it diagonally toward Grant and Suki. “He is still searching the village where you caused a scene. I will be much gentler when I present you to the grand jester.” His eyes shot sideways, to Suki. “Much gentler.”

“We won’t be serving that madman.” He placed a hand on the hilt of February 29, and stepped in front of her. “I recommend you get out of our way, before something bad happens to you. I would just hate to see something bad happen to someone such as yourself.”

<Ooh, good one. I could feel the sarcasm through my sheath.>

“How about we make a deal?” Fluffy Fingers twirled his scepter in a mildly impressive display of martial prowess. “You walk away after swearing an oath that you will leave Dokeshi March alone.  If you break that deal, you die.”

“I have a better idea, Fluffy.”  Grant used his thumb to pop the first inch of his sword out of its sheath.  “We fight, and if I lose, I swear your oath.  If I win, I get to destroy your Wielded Weapon.”

“Ha!  And they call me a clown!”  Fluffy tapped his staff to his head, and chanted in a creepy high-pitched sing-song voice.  “A deal presented, a deal is made.  The bargain’s struck, now your fate is made.”

A prompt popped up in Grant’s vision.  It looked different from any he had seen before.  The edges were frayed, reminiscent of the malfunctioning border wall that had warped the beasts in District February.

Congratulations! You have struck a deal with the famously fantastic, sarcastically spastic, bombastically gymnastic, never puffy or scruffy, Fluffy Fingers!

Details: Grant Friday (Monday) will either abandon any attempts at defeating Dokeshi March, or Destroy the Scepter of Fluffy Fingers.

Conditions: A Duel between the mighty Eighth Vassal of March First and the Wielder of February Twenty Ninth will decide the outcome.

Note: This deal uses the daily allotment of one offered agreement per day.  Vassal weapons do not have the inherent power to kill an oathbreaker - terms of the agreement will have to shift authority from Vassal to Wielder upon earliest convenience to fulfill the full scope of punitive actions.

<It looks like you stepped in it this time, Grant.>  Sarge seemed to pulse in anger.  <If you can’t defeat this clown, your journey - and your life - end here.>

“Don’t worry, I got this.”  Grant unsheathed his sword, diving forward in a furious display of Iaijutsu that would have made any Kenjutsu master proud.  A moment before impact, he was frozen in place, the tip of his Uchigatana drawing a drop of blood from the shaking Adam’s apple of Fluffy Fingers.

Combat initiated - Duel

Action: Attack with weapon.

Result: Duel format requires proper acknowledgment from both parties.  Attack stopped.  Turn surrendered due to improper actions.

Actions: Please select one option from the following list.

Attack: Lethal, Non-lethal, Spell.

Defend: With weapon, Without weapon.

Run: Attempt escape.

“What?!”  Grant felt like he had pulled a muscle in his shoulder from such a sudden stop, and the confusion from the abrupt rule change in the system caused him to pause before selecting an action.  It left him open, and Fluffy Fingers smashed him in the temple with the glowing crystal at the end of his scepter.  Stars exploded across his vision, and a damage notification appeared in front of his dazed eyes.

Damage taken: 19 blunt (50 mitigated)

<Adapt and overcome, Grant!>  Sarge’s shout brought him back into focus, allowing him to quickly select ‘Attack: Spell.’  <That’s what I’m talking about!  Remember your training!>

The sudden impact of Thundering Step on Fluffy Fingers bought Grant the time to get some space between the two of them.  The clown was almost hopping in place, a dome of brown-tinted lightning surrounding his colorful form.

Damage dealt: 80 * (2 seconds) = 160 - (60 mitigated) = 100 total damage

“That’s not right!  My spell should have lasted for 5 seconds!”  Grant’s indignation at the situation was another distraction, and he once again missed the chance to select his next action.  The orb thrown by Fluffy Finger impacted against his breastplate, and a blinding smoke erupted in Grant’s face.  “Bah!  It burns!”

<Focus, Grant!>  Sarge was interrupted by the giggles of Fluffy Fingers.  <Quit acting like this is your first fight, and get your head in the game!  The system must have limited your spell somehow, but now isn’t the time to dwell on it.  Teach that sideshow freak a lesson!>

With a growl, Grant selected ‘Attack: Lethal’, and used his turn to leap forward and slam his Uchigatana into the upraised scepter of his opponent.  February 29 let out a grinding squeal as the two weapons slid along each other in a shower of sparks.  As he jumped away from the failed strike, Grant noticed a small curl of wood coming off of the side of the scepter.  His sword must have caught a bit of the vassal’s weapon, peeling a strip off like a banana.

“It looks like I am already working on breaking your weapon, Fluffy!”  Grant gave his sword a flourishing twirl, showing off his aptitude.  “Are you sure you don’t want to just give up now, and save yourself the pain?”

His words did have some merit.  While Grant only had puffy eyes from the gas used on him, the clown was looking a little frazzled from the lightning spell, and the end of his scepter was flickering after the damage it had received.

“Okay, kid.”  Fluffy Fingers flicked his hand, and a throwing knife appeared between each of his digits.  “I think it’s time to show me how I got my name.”  His arm whipped forward in a blur, and all thoughts of further taunting went the way of the Hoopty Bird.

Grant was barely able to select ‘Defend: With weapon’ in time to stop one of the knives the clown threw at him.  The other three impacted hard enough to knock him back a step.

Damage taken: 3*30 = 40 piercing (50 mitigated)

Health: 307/352

“Regent December, that hurt!”  Somehow, the knives had all managed to find weak points in his leg armor, and the blood flowing down his calves felt hot against his suddenly clammy skin.  “I can’t afford to take many more hits like that!”

<You need to stop trying to get in his head.  Your trash-talking is pretty garbage, Grant.>  Sarge threw another orange-tinted stone that struck him in the head.  <You trained for this.  Now use it!>

The shift in the tempo of the duel wasn’t a good one.  Grant had used his turn to defend, so he had to weather a storm of thrown knives and glass orbs filled with all kinds of various substances meant to distract and harm.  All he could do was shift his focus toward defense, constantly selecting the ‘Defend: With weapon’ option on reflex.

Grant’s health points steadily trickled away, but he fought through the pain and disorientation, finding within himself the place that allowed him to deflect even the smallest of objects thrown his direction.

Each move became a part of a flowing dance, his Uchigatana an extension of his will.  The shift in the fight came slowly, but Grant allowed the harmony of his movements to guide him.  He went from deflecting one or two of Fluffy Fingers’ thrown objects per turn, to a single movement that kept himself free of any damage.

“How?!”  Grant was broken out of his trance by the shouted exclamation of the clown.  “I threw everything I had at you, and you are still standing!”

<I didn’t want to interrupt you there, kid, but take a look around.>  Grant did as Sarge ordered, looking at the surprisingly large ring of objects lying around him.  <You’ve been at this for almost ten minutes.>

Grant checked his health, and saw that it was still above two hundred points.  The blood once again coating his body was all his, but it was time to change that.  This turn, Grant selected ‘Attack: With weapon’.

The Uchigatana practically leapt from his hands as he took a deep lunge at the Vassal of Dokeshi March.  The clown used his scepter to once again deflect the strike, however the block wasn’t as clean as the last time their weapons had clashed.  Grant’s sword was able to slide along the groove of the scepter shaft and diamond, allowing him to stab into the upper arm of Fluffy Fingers.

<Good!  Don’t lose your focus.  Strike while the iron is hot!>  Sarge’s voice showed his excitement.  He must have been very concerned about Grant losing.  <He’s all out of tricks now.  Time to use your Kenjutsu to its finest!>

Taking action to words, Grant slid his Uchigatana down the shaft of the scepter and almost took off the clown’s namesake.  As the blood ratio on Grant’s armor changed, he spun in place and planted his sword through the foot of Fluffy Fingers while using an elbow strike to his chest to push him backwards.  The embedded sword split the foot in half, and the enemy Vassal screamed in pain.

“I yield!  I yield!”  Grant stopped himself from stomping on Fluffy’s throat with the heel of his boot.  “Please, don’t kill me!”

Before he had to guess if the clown was lying or not, the system confirmed his words.

Congratulations! Your new battle count moves from [2 Wins / 1 Losses] to [3 Wins / 1 Losses]. Remember, the lucky rise to the challenge!

<Quickly, step away from him!>  Grant had just pried his sword free from the blood-slicked cobblestones when the scepter in Fluffy Fingers’ hand exploded with a massive blast of heat and light.

“Gah!”  Grant was blown away, slamming to the ground flat on his back.  The wind was knocked out of his lungs, and he couldn’t help but gasp like a fish on dry land.  After a few moments, he managed to wheeze out a question.  “What just happened?  I thought I was supposed to have the chance to absorb his weapon’s power?”

<The deal you made with him must have trumped the power to absorb his power.>  Sarge switched his tone from consoling to commanding.  <Now get up off the ground, and see how bad the damage is.>

Before he could comply, Suki was suddenly by his side.  “Grant, that was one of the craziest fights I have ever seen!”  She got him back on his feet, managing to somehow keep her clothes free from the blood and dirt he was covered in.  “It took entirely too long for you to defeat him, but I guess forcing him to run out of things to throw at you is a good way to train yourself while fighting.  I think toward the end there, he was down to flinging eating utensils at you.”  She pointed at a spoon to make her point.

“You… fools!”  The groan that came from the prone form of the clown stopped Grant from being able to answer.  “You have no idea what you have done!”  Suddenly, everyone that had been standing around on the street watching the fight froze.  Grant instantly understood why, because the screen they must have been reading popped up in front of his vision as well.

Warning: System failure.  Agreement, Deal, and Oath enforcement has been halted.  Please stay calm.  An administrator will be dispatched to your location.  Remember, events   arou  aaaa   are   aaaaa   aatnearathen…

The edges of the screen blurred, and then it disappeared in a burst of static.  The bystanders stood around for a moment, looking at one another in amazement.  Then, with shouts of joy, they ran toward the market square in the distance.  Shouts and screams soon followed, and plumes of smoke started rising from several buildings.

<I think it would be best if we got off the street.>  Sarge let loose a sigh inside Grant’s head.  <If the Dokeshi’s system really did just go down, things are only going to get worse.>