Tycoon May: Chapter 6 (Patreon)

Chapter 6  

Grant took a step back from the smells assaulting his nose.  The harsh scent of boiling herbs and astringent chemicals burned the back of his throat, forcing him to cough.

“You okay?  I know it doesn’t smell good, but that’s just the cost of doing business with a healer.”  Doug stepped through the doorway of the house attached to the side of a small greenhouse.  “Come on, let’s see what’s on offer today.”

Pushing down his urge to vomit, Grant followed Doug inside.  He was confronted with an abundance of shelves, all weighed down with potions and pill bottles surrounded by dried monster parts, herbs, and dusty armor.  A narrow path down the center led to a counter running the full length of the rear of the small store.

<Whatever you do, don’t buy any of those pills.>  Grant looked at the closest pill bottle, which glowed with power.  <No one at the Summer levels could possibly make a pill that was free of contaminants.  Taking one of these would provide a temporary boost, but the long-term effects would be very bad.>

“Ah, I see you are admiring my cultivation pills!”  A barefoot old man wearing a frayed robe with a length of rope for a belt came out from behind a curtain on the back wall.  “Those are guaranteed to help with physical cultivation, as long as you take them according to a strict regimen, and you don’t eat any form of fish for thirteen days after taking the last one.  Not sure why it happens, but some customers get webbed feet if they eat any form of seafood.”  Grant looked down at his own feet, and curled his toes in a twitch of concern.  “But, that’s neither here nor there!”  The vendor noticed Grant’s concern, and threw an arm over his shoulders to lead him deeper into the shop.  “What a discerning man like yourself needs, is this!”  He waved his hand with a flourish, pointing at a potion that glowed with a sickly green light.  As Grant watched, a crackle of lightning flashed inside the round bottle.  “One of the rarest items in the whole District!  Why, if Tycoon May walked through my door, it would be the first thing he purchased!”

<Whatever you do, don’t drink the lightning snot.>

“Um, what is it?”  Grant ignored Sarge, doing his best not to offend the man.  “I’ve never seen anything like it.”

“My boy, that’s the essence of a Lightning Slime!”

<Told you.>

“Drink that - along with some healing potions to fix the damage - and you will be immune to all lightning strikes!”  The old man thumbed his ear for a moment.  “Oh, and you can never eat carrots for the rest of your life.  Otherwise, you turn into a Lightning Slime yourself.  They really must have something against the color orange.”

“They hate the color orange?”  Doug looked just as confused as Grant felt.  “Why would a Lightning Slime hate the color orange?”

“Maybe it isn’t the color orange.  It could be root vegetables in general.”  The merchant thumbed his ear some more in thought.  “It might be best to avoid all forms of root vegetables.  And eating anything orange, just to be safe.”

“I think I’ll pass.”  Grant shuffled away from the scraggly-haired alchemist and pointed at Doug.  “He’s the reason we’re here.  His arm was broken while we were defending the gate, and he needs a health potion to fix it.”

“Ah, a broken bone, you say?”  The alchemist shuffled over to poke at Doug’s injured arm.  “Sounds like you need a Bone Growth Pill, and probably an Inflammation Imbuement to help with the swelling.”  Doug winced as the old man manipulated his fingers.  “Oh, and I can’t forget a few sprigs of Purple Pustule Moss for the pain.”

“Purple Pustule Moss?”  Grant had never heard of such a thing.

“Yes, Purple Pustule Moss.”  The alchemist waggled his eyebrows at the two warriors.  “It doesn’t actually help with the pain.  It just tastes so bad that you forget about anything else.”

“Um, can we leave off the Purple Pustule Moss?  I can handle some extra pain.”  Doug swallowed heavily, clearly regretting even walking through the door.

“Are you sure?  I’m running a two-for-one special today!  Buy three non-standard healing items, and I’ll give you a mystery concoction for half price!”  He grinned, showing a few gaps in his smile.  “You don’t get deals like that every day, you know.”

“But, how is that a two-for-one special?”  Grant was holding his hands up, counting on his fingers in confusion.  “That’s not how math works.”

“My boy, who knows how math works?  Only the gods can divine the mysteries of numbers.  I’m just a lowly alchemist, running a buy-one-get-one, try free tomorrow customer special!”  The old man cackled in joy as he tottered back toward the counter.  “Just wait here, I’ll get you exactly what you need.”

“What just happened?”  Doug shook his head like he was trying to clear it of cobwebs.  “Is it weird that I’m more afraid now than when the badgers were trying to kill me?”

“Nope.  Not weird at all.”  Grant poked at the lightning slime, getting a shocking jolt through the glass.  “Are you sure he isn’t insane?”

“He’s the only alchemist in this part of the city, so it doesn’t really matter.  Supposedly, the only reason he’s allowed to operate in the first layer is because his family is important.  It’s only rumors, but I heard his brother is a big deal in District September.  Anyway, if I want to get back out there in the next few weeks, this is my only choice.”  Doug winced again as he leaned against a dusty set of shelving.  “His methods may be odd, but they work.”

The two warriors fell into silence while the scraggly-bearded alchemist puttered around in the back of the store.  After a few minutes, he came back out holding a burlap sack that clinked as it swung at his side.

“Alright.  Medicine for constipation, poor eyesight, and ringing in the ears.  That will be five Weeks.”  The alchemist held out a dirt-encrusted hand, waiting patiently for payment.

“Wrong patient, sir.  I’ve got a broken arm.”  Doug motioned to his limp limb hanging in its sling.

“Oh, that’s right!  These are my medications!”  The alchemist dug into the sack and took out a narrow vial that held what looked like blue glitter.  He dumped a portion into each eye, hissing in pain as he blinked away the grit.  “Just hold on, I’ll be right back.”  Grant and Doug looked at each other with concern, but the old man returned in a flash before they could voice any concerns.  “Here we go!  That will be six Days.  Take these twice a day for three days, and stay indoors during the New Moon for the rest of the year.”

“Well, what happens if I’m outside during the New Moon?”  Doug hesitated, taking his time pulling out the coins.  “Do I turn into something weird?”

“Oh no, nothing like that.  It’s just bad luck to be outside at night when the moon is all covered!”  The alchemist cackled with joy once again, snatching the coins out of Doug’s hand.  “Be sure to come back tomorrow for your free sample of Bog Bug Butter Beans.  They're like Bog Bug Butter pills, but shaped like beans!”

The two left the shop, neither completely sure about what had just happened.  Grant took Doug’s staff so the injured man could take his medicine.  He watched as Doug swallowed, wincing in sympathy.

“So, you say his family is important in District September?”  Grant shook his head, imagining the insanity that would result with having someone like that in charge of anything.

<It sounds bonkers.>

“Yeah, but September is really far away.  That’s not what’s important, though.”  Doug looked at the sky.  “Tonight’s a New Moon, and the sun is almost down.  I need to get home before sundown, just in case.  You can sleep on my couch if you want.”

“No, that’s okay.  I’m going to do a little more exploring while the sun’s still up.”  Grant shook Doug’s hand, and they shared a nod of gratitude, one warrior to another.

“Well, if I see you on the battlefield, I’ll be sure to stand beside you, Grant.  Well met.”  Doug took back his staff, and turned to walk back the way they had come.  Before walking out of sight, he turned to yell back at Grant.  “If you ever want to fight at the barrier of District March again, be sure to look me up.  Those battles always turn out dicey!”

Grant only shook his head.  Doug had no idea how dicey anything with District March could be.