why i believe in god pt 2 (Patreon)

ever tried dealing with anger and grief without resorting to destructive habits? no alcohol. no late nights. just screaming into the void and crying randomly. it gets tiring. i cant even write songs.

its been rough since lola died, and since my dad was brought to the hospital. even more rough since pastor tony died.

if my belief in god was rooted in having a great and blessed life, then i should be an atheist right now. well, partly true. the band is doing really well. but it took years to get here, and i would be absolutely devastated if i lost my career. i guess this reason has yet to be tried to the fullest. i hope it doesn't have to.

im really really really really really really sad. dont really feel like writing.

but i believe in a god who experienced grief the same way i do. he has experienced it to a greater extent, even unto death. i remember his words and gain some strength. i feel his presence and gain some comfort. i believe in god because my soul has not found this kind of rest in anyone else. not even sofia.

right now i need god more than ever. im hanging by a thread