ASL2: Chapter 84 "Cards On The Table" (Patreon)

-- CHAPTER 84: Cards On The Table --

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-- THURSDAY, JULY 2, 2009 --

The ropes course activity was fun for everyone. Dad fell off the ropes a couple of times, for which Jack Evans ribbed him quite a bit. Sasha was a total pro, with perfect balance to the point where it seemed like she could walk the rope without needing to hold onto anything. Adrienne said she felt like a cow on ice, and Emma pointed out that she was pretty top-heavy.

Dawn was also uncharacteristically clumsy. Normally she had such focus that she could master these challenges with ease, not to mention that she’d already been up on this course more than a dozen times over the years by now. I felt Adrienne’s eyes on me, her voice in the back of my head asking what was going on. But I didn’t want to get into that stuff in the middle of the family challenge. I was rather distracted myself, knowing there was a loaded conversation I’d still need to have with Dawn. Although I’d come to my resolution regarding Option Three that I not only needed to help her realize we’d never get married in the future, but also that I needed to break off our current romantic relationship until we could re-equalize ourselves as best friends, there hadn’t been time to tell her all that before our ropes course reservation.

After we all returned to earth and were once again upon on solid ground, BJ scrambled away from the moms and rushed into my arms. I picked him up and set him on my hip while he animatedly recapped everything he’d seen. His arms gestured out to the sides as he explained, “And den you went ‘Ohhh!’ And den I tot you was gon fall. But den Daddy went ‘Uhhh!’ and he catch you! And yoh ahm was all stretch. But Daddy had yoh hand, and he pull, and then it was ‘Oh, yay. I’m okay!’ So funnnny. Hee-hee-hee.”

Seriously, BJ’s recap was even more fun than the real thing.

The plan was to change into our swimwear and head over to the lake for the rest of the afternoon before dinner. BJ was already in his swimsuit, as were the moms, so they took him straight to the lake so he wouldn’t have to wait for the rest of us to change. The dads went off to their cabin while the girls and I headed off in the other direction. And as we approached the cabins, I took a deep breath and prepared myself to ask Dawn if she and I could talk privately.

But before I could, Summer spoke up, saying a bit uncertainly, “Hey guys? Can we all come inside together for a bit? We need to talk. As a group.”

I gave her a look of surprise, not expecting her to preempt me. The rest of us all glanced at each other to check if anyone else knew what was going on, and then Adrienne was the first to ask, “Talk about what?”

Summer took a deep breath and gestured towards me. “About which one of us is gonna marry Ben.”

The twins looked confused. Adrienne frowned. Sasha glanced straight at me, as did Kim and June. Dawn kept her head down.

Adrienne finally spoke, asking, “You’re not serious, are you?”

“As serious as my mother’s death. Yes, that serious,” Summer stated plainly.

Eden’s eyes got big, and she stared at me with an expression that asked, ‘Did she REALLY just say that?’

Adrienne frowned and looked questioningly at me as well. I looked confused and held my hands up helplessly. Next, both of us (and everyone else) turned their attention to Dawn.

Feeling dozens of eyes lasered in on her, Dawn blushed and gestured to the purple-haired girl next to her, explaining, “This is all Summer’s idea. I’ll let her explain.”

“C’mon,” Summer continued, gesturing towards my family’s bigger cabin. “Let’s everyone go inside.”

Even in the “big” cabin, ten people was a tight fit. There was only one couch and a table with four chairs in the living room, so we ended up crowding into the bunk room. The twins sat cross-legged atop the bunk bed while Kim and June parked themselves on the bottom bunk. Adrienne and Sasha sat together on the bed-bridged king-size against the opposite wall, and I was perched on the side of the bed with my heels up on the bedframe. And Summer and Dawn sat together on Brooke’s single bed in the middle of the room.

“I think it’s long past time we all laid our cards on the table, as it were,” Summer stated with a quiet certainty. “I know we’re all still a little emotionally raw. Ever since my mom died, you’ve all done so much for me, every one of you. I know this is a tightly-knit group of people who love each other very, very much, and would gladly run through a brick wall if it meant making someone else’s life just a little bit better.”

“Well maybe you would, but I’m not really a fan of brick walls,” June muttered.

Adrienne snorted, Kim elbowed June, and June blushed. I chuckled and remarked, “And they used to say you had no sense of humor.”

“I’ve been doing a lot of thinking the past few weeks… a LOT of thinking,” Summer said with a sigh. “Losing my mom is going to haunt me for the rest of my life, and I’m not sure I’ll ever truly get over it. But being with the rest of you means the world to me. Feeling your love, seeing how many of your friends and family showed up to support us, I’ve never experienced that before. It’s because of all of you that I feel strong enough to face the coming days. It’s because of all of you that I know I’ll never have to be alone again. But at the same time, we’ve all been reminded that life is precious… and fragile… and that there’s no guarantee we’ll all be together again the same time tomorrow.”

Everyone was nodding, everyone except for Adrienne. My Tigress leaned forward with her forearms on her knees, narrowed her eyes, and said, “I get all that, but I don’t get why that means we need to get together and discuss which one of us is gonna marry Ben.”

“Well for one thing,” Summer explained, “We all know that Ben and Dawn hiked out to their special clearing this morning. I’m not going to go into the nitty-gritty details about what they said, but bottom line, they came to a mutual understanding that they really are better off as best friends and will never, ever get married.”

Adrienne’s eyes narrowed. “I fail to see how this is new information. Hasn’t Dawn been insisting to anyone and everyone who’ll listen that she never, ever wanted to be his government-titled wife?”

I leaned forward, “And just because Dawn and I got that part locked down this morning doesn’t mean we suddenly need to have a group discussion about which one of the rest of you is gonna marry me.”

“Yes, it does,” Summer stated firmly. “This is a family, a team. This is a conversation we need to have collectively to put our cards on the table and make some decisions.”

I shook my head. “There is no way in hell we’re deciding collectively whether or not I’m getting married at all, let alone who I’m going to marry. That kind of decision will be entirely between me and the woman in question and is NOT subject to group approval.”

“Please…” Adrienne drawled. “Do you honestly think you’d actually make that kind of decision without asking the rest of us for our input?”

I arched an eyebrow at her. “Well of course I’d ask for your input and everyone else’s.”

“Damn straight you will. We’re a part of each other’s lives, Tiger: united and intertwined.” Reaching forward, Adrienne grabbed my shoulders and pulled me down flat on my back so that I was looking upside-down at her as she loomed over me. “You’re the only man I will ever truly love, I will be a part of your life for the rest of mine, and that’s final.”

I chuckled and puckered up. “Yes, dear.”

The others around the circle giggled as Adrienne bent over and pecked my lips. Across the room, June stage-whispered to Kim quite loudly, “Explain to me again why they won’t get together?”

Kim rolled her eyes and didn’t bother to mime stage-whispering. “If I had an explanation that I thought made any logical sense, I’d tell you, but I don’t.”

“I do,” Adrienne interjected. “(A) Summer’s his girlfriend. And (B) We all know Ben and Dawn being only ‘best friends’ is bullshit. They’re soulmates who can freaking read each other’s minds. They can never truly be separated, and even ME plainly stating to him flat out - in this very camp - that if he ever fucked her again, that would be the day he lost me, they still couldn’t be separated.”

Still flat on my back, I stared up at my Tigress as I said softly, “I’m still sorry about that.”

Adrienne’s nostrils flared once as she snorted, but then she sighed and shook her head dismissively. “I’m over it. I mean clearly, I’m not completely over it, but yeah I’m kinda over it. I get it, and I forgave you a long time ago even if I can’t quite forget. I was wrong to try to separate you back then and if anything, I’m the one that owes you an apology. But we’re getting off topic right now. The point is: you two love each other, will always love each other, and if we’re going to seriously have a discussion about which one of us girls is gonna marry you, it’s really between Summer and Dawn.”

“It’s not gonna be me,” Dawn stated quietly. “Ben’s right: we’re better off as best friends. The tension and anxiety were killing us. I tried to insist I was a hundred percent certain we wouldn’t get married, but at the same time I still thought about marrying him all the time every day. It was stressing me out. It was stressing him out.”

“It was my fault,” I interjected. “For still holding out that shred of hope that she might change her mind. My refusal to accept that she didn’t want to be officially married just gave us both a lot of anxiety. I kept asking, she kept calling me a fucking moron for not listening to her, and all the circular arguments we got into were just rotting our relationship from the inside. Like I said: we recognized we really are better off as best friends. And by putting the matter to rest, it allows us to finally move forward without that tension anymore.”

“Great for you guys. Really, I mean it,” Adrienne said, although her tone was somewhat less than sincere as she focused on Summer. “But I’m still confused. Just because they realized they’re better off as Best Friends Forever doesn’t mean that we should be meeting up to discuss what seems like a conversation asking, ‘Okay, Dawn’s out. Who’s up next?’”

“Okay, okay, okay.” Summer held her hands up and waggled them with a sigh. “It’s clear I’m going about this the wrong way by asking you all to discuss which one of us is gonna marry Ben. So let’s try a different approach. I’M going to marry Ben. Any objections?”

Adrienne and Sasha immediately jerked their heads back in surprise at the finality in Summer’s tone. June canted her head to the side and took on her “I’m calculating” expression. But Eden raised her hand atop the bunk bed and said, “Sure, I’ll object.”

Now everybody gawked at Eden.

My baby sister looked at me as I sat up straight again, and she said, “Before you actually get married, I have to at least try and ask one last time if you’ll consider moving with me to another country where nobody knows we’re related and will let me marry you.”

“Uhhh, no,” I stated flatly.

Eden deflated a little and sighed, but bobbed her head up and down. “I figured. Okay, objection withdrawn. You’re good, Summer, at least so long as you hold to that promise about never kicking me out of bed if I want to come sleep in his arms.”

Summer smiled warmly. “I promise.”

“I also haven’t felt him inside me since we got here,” Eden continued. “If I vote for you, will you let me fuck him tonight?”

Summer laughed. “Of course.”

Eden flashed two thumbs up. “She’s got my vote.”

“We’re not taking votes,” I grumbled.

“For the record, I’ll vote for any of you who’ll let me fuck him tonight,” Eden continued.

“Eed,” I growled.

“What?” she asked with false innocence.

“If I said I’d fill you up with eight inches of brother dick tonight would you behave?”

“NO promises.” My baby sister smirked and shrugged, not looking the least bit contrite, and I sighed.

“Well… anybody else?” Summer asked, surveying the others. “No other objections?”

Sasha elbowed Adrienne. Adrienne shot her ex-girlfriend a harsh look.

I sighed and raised my hand, “I can’t believe I actually have to do this, but I object.”

Summer frowned. “What?”

“We are NOT getting engaged like this.”

Summer waggled her head. “I didn’t mean we’d actually get engaged like this. I didn’t ask you to marry me, did I? I just said, ‘I’m going to marry you’ and then asked if anybody objected. The point here is to stimulate discussion, not actually put a ring on it. Think of it as one of Professor Ice’s case studies.”

I frowned. “You’re turning our romantic life into a case study?”

“I’m trying to get everyone’s cards on the table. I’m trying to get everyone…” Summer gestured around the room, “…to get out of their own heads and talk about their true feelings. Especially this one, that one, and maybe even that one!” Summer tapped Dawn first, then pointed at Adrienne, and finally added Sasha at the end.

“Me?” Dawn queried, looking confused. “I’ve already told you and everyone else that Ben and I are better off as best friends.”

“Yes, you did,” Summer confirmed. “I also know we spent more than an hour talking, and yet you still haven’t gotten out of your own head and still won’t talk about your true feelings.”

“Nnngh,” Dawn groaned as she face-palmed.

“You need to open up,” Summer advised.

Sasha cocked her head. “You’re asking us to have Open Communication!”

Summer smirked. “Yes, basically.”

Sasha elbowed Adrienne again. Adrienne shot her ex-girlfriend a harsh look again.

“Something to say, A.D.?” Summer queried.

“Nope. Nothing to say,” Adrienne muttered quietly.

“C’mon, A.D. Everyone here knows how much you love him. I just told you two minutes ago that I’m going to marry Ben. You have nothing to say about that?”

“If this were an actual engagement, I’d say congratulations and wish the both of you all the happiness in the world.” Adrienne’s voice was decidedly less than enthusiastic. But she seemed to sense that and sat up a little straighter. And in a more heartfelt voice, she added, “You’re my friend, you’ve gone through some of the worst emotional pain a human being can go through, and you deserve every joy in this life you can find. I believe you can make Ben happy. I believe you both can make each other happy. So while I realize the purpose of this is more ‘case study’ than ‘actual proposal’, I just want to say that when it finally happens, not if, I will be thrilled for both of you.”

“[Bullshit!]” Sasha coughed with a fist in front of her mouth before sitting up and blinking a few times. She then sat up theatrically, pressed the five fingers of her right hand to her chest, and glanced around the room. “Oh, I’m sorry. Had a tickle in my throat.”

Adrienne glared at the brunette.

“Something to add, Sasha?” Summer pressed.

“Open Communication,” Sasha replied encouragingly, nudging Adrienne again.

“I’ve got nothing else to say,” Adrienne muttered. “Summer’s his girlfriend.”

Summer shook her head. “We’re never gonna get anywhere if you can’t be fully honest with me.”

“I AM being fully honest with you.”

“No you’re not,” Dawn said quietly, her eyebrows up.

Adrienne’s eyes narrowed. “Oh, and you’re gonna start talking shit about being fully open and honest?”

“Hey, hey…” I extended my arm out to Adrienne and squeezed Dawn against my side, warding off Dawn from responding. “Let’s please not turn this into a catfight.”

“I’m not--” Adrienne began before stopping herself and gritting her teeth.

I took a deep breath, exhaled slowly, and began, “The day before Yvaine died, Adrienne told me I was her Plan A. She decided she wasn’t rebounding anymore, that she would always love Sasha and hope for her to come home, but that even if Sasha did return, I’d still be her Plan A. She said she wants to be my wife again, to bear my children, to move into my bedroom and take over ninety-five percent of my closet. She said she keeps my engagement ring in her nightstand and would put it on just to lie in bed and stare at it. She said she wants to have everything we dreamed about back when we were engaged…”

I let out a long exhalation. Everyone could tell I wasn’t done yet, and Dawn led me, “Buuuttt…”

“But she insisted she’d never be the selfish bitch that took me away from Summer,” I finished.

Summer sat up straight and stared straight at Adrienne. My Tigress had scrunched her face up and buried it in her hands with her elbows on her knees, and Sasha was rubbing Adrienne’s back. With a curious look, Summer asked, “You said all that the day before my mom died?”

“I can’t. Believe. You said all that, Tiger,” Adrienne moaned without removing her face from her palms.

“You gonna try claiming it’s not the truth?” I asked.

“Yes, exactly. It’s not the truth,” she growled and sat up straight, glaring at me. Grabbing Sasha’s hand between both of hers, she narrowed her eyes at me and scowled, saying, “I’m a lesbian. My romantic love is for other women. I was lonely because Sasha’s the love of my life and she was out there trotting the globe without me and I was latching onto my Rock, the one I’ve always run to for comfort when I needed it most. But it wasn’t real. I don’t actually want to marry you, Tiger. I was just really, really lonely, and now that Sasha’s back I don’t need you in that way anymore.”

I frowned and started processing what she’d said. Meanwhile, Dawn shook her head and leaned forward, looking at Sasha as she asked, “And do you feel the same way about Adrienne?”

Sasha blinked and looked taken aback. She glanced at Adrienne, furrowed her eyebrows, and then looked back at Adrienne before replying, “Honestly, I don’t know what to say.”

“I call bullshit,” I stated firmly.

Sasha blinked at me in surprise. “Uh, I’m not sure why you’d think that, because I really don’t--”

“Oh, no, sorry-sorry,” I stammered. “I didn’t mean you. I meant Adrienne. I’m calling bullshit on her claiming she doesn’t want to marry me.”

Adrienne pulled her head back. “What?”

I shook my head. “You think I haven’t been paying attention to you ever since Sasha left? You think I’m the same clueless moron who couldn’t read anyone back in high school? We’re not kids anymore, you’ve always worn your heart on your sleeve, and I can tell when you’re lying to me. Are you perhaps clinging to Sasha a bit now that she’s back because you won’t let yourself be the bitch that steals me from Summer? Sure. But don’t claim that her return made you suddenly realize your feelings for me three weeks ago weren’t true. I held you in my arms, felt your passion for me, and I knew what was really in your heart.”

“I didn’t…” Adrienne faltered. “I’m not…”

“This isn’t the first time that fear has made you hesitate to move forward with me. In high school you came up with ‘nottogether’. In college you tried to deflect me with Paige. Now it’s making you try to lie about being a lesbian and wanting to get back together with Sasha.”

“Tigerrr…” Adrienne whined.

“Sasha, back me up here,” I said.

Sasha nodded. “It’s true. She loves him and wants to be with him. She spent months texting me and calling me to moan and groan about him like a lovesick teenager. She feels like she missed her opportunity in that gap between Valentine’s when Dawn rejected him and agreeing that Summer should be his official girlfriend in March. Kim told her that was the moment she needed to step up and fight for him, that if she did, she could finally have him back. Dawn asked Adrienne if she was ready to become everything he wanted her to be, and if so she’d do everything she could to help Adrienne become his wife. The chance to reconnect was there when they flew off to New York together. But she let her ego get bruised by the idea of being his Plan B. The Taylor thing happened and made her fly off to Malibu. And the next thing she knew, Summer was in his arms and in his bed, and she felt like she’d missed out.”

Adrienne seemed to shrink as she buried her face in her hands again, mumbling, “Traitor…”

“Open Communication.”

“Fuck open communication,” Adrienne bitched.

“No, this is good, this is good,” Summer said encouragingly. “I want this stuff to all come out.”

June canted her head to the side. “Adrienne basically admitted she wants your boyfriend, and you think this is good?”

“It’s not a competition,” Summer stated simply. “Look at us, ALL of us. We all love him, don’t we? And he loves all of us. Adrienne’s afraid of stealing from me, but in plain simple fact: that’s impossible. Or are you claiming you’d try to kick me out of his life if the two of you got married?” That last part was directed at Adrienne.

The blonde popped her head up. “What? No! Never!”

“Then what’s the problem?” Summer asked with plain honesty. “Love him. Be IN love with him. Tell him you want to marry him. Tell him you’ll love him Forever and Always.”

“I WILL love him Forever and Always,” Adrienne replied, “but you’re his girlfriend.”

“And I’m his wife,” Dawn stated flatly. “But he can clearly have more than one.”

Adrienne’s eyebrows went up and she looked at me. “What happened to recognizing you two better off as best friends?”

Dawn set her jaw with a firm look of resolve. “We are best friends. I’ll never actually marry him, but he’s already the only husband I’ll ever have in my heart. ‘Til death do us part. For all eternity… Forever and Always.”

“Then you’re only talking semantics,” Adrienne muttered. “To you, the terms ‘best friend’ and ‘wife’ are interchangeable.”

“No, not at all.” Dawn took a deep breath and glanced at me. “Words have meaning, and to Ben, the term ‘best friend’ implied that we weren’t romantic and that if he didn’t claim me, that eventually some other man might make me ‘his cow’. Despite all my promises, he still lived in fear. But when we had that talk about expectations and collectively agreed that it was time to make Summer his official girlfriend, I told him that I was already his wife and he was already my husband. I reminded him that I was more devoted and faithful to him than millions of other titled wives claimed to be. And even right now I’ll remind him that just because we’ve agreed to a title of ‘best friends’, in my heart that still means I’m his ‘wife’.”

June arched an eyebrow. “That’s exactly the definition of semantics.”

“Fine, fine, we’re talking semantics,” Dawn conceded.

“So you ARE claiming the wife mantle?” Adrienne asked.

“I’m claiming it on my own terms.”

“Which is what, exactly?” Adrienne asked rather coldly. “Planting your flag first to claim primacy?”

“She didn’t mean it like that,” Summer insisted.

“I really didn’t,” Dawn agreed before taking a deep breath. “Ben and I have both made clear to you and everyone else that we will never have the government paperwork. We’re agreed on that, and I’ve accepted in my heart that I will never be his titled wife. But functionally, I don’t want to change anything about our current relationship. I’m not going to live with him as a traditional wife does: I’m not going to move into his bedroom and spend every night in his arms, I’m not going to take over his closet, and I’m not going to ‘claim primacy’. Really, nothing changes from our existing ‘best friends’ relationship, and we’ve both agreed that nothing WILL change, either. I belong to him. Forever.”

“Wait-wait-wait,” I interjected, shaking my head. “That is NOT what we agreed to. I told you this morning that our existing relationship has gone to shit and we definitely need to make some changes.”

Dawn frowned at me. “Changes like what?”

I took a deep breath and glanced at Sasha, the only one who knew of my Option Three plan to ‘break up’ with Dawn. And then turning back to Dawn, I pursed my lips and explained, “Changes that you and I need to discuss in private one-on-one.”

“Awww…” June groaned with an expression that plainly stated she didn’t want to miss out.

“Is this the part where Ben explains that not only are he and Dawn better as best friends, but also that Ben wants to break up with her on their romantic relationship until they can find their balance again?” Eden asked with her right hand raised.

“Wait, what?” Dawn sat up straight and turned to look at me with a fresh world of hurt in her eyes.

I blinked in surprise at Eden. “How in the world did you--? I didn’t… Sasha!” Turning to face Sasha, I glared at the brunette who was currently gawking across the room at Eden with a look of shocked surprise.

“I didn’t tell Eden! I didn’t say anything to anyone!” Sasha exclaimed defensively.

“You didn’t tell Eden what?” Adrienne asked roughly. “What does she know that you didn’t even tell me?!”

“She didn’t,” Emma explained wearily before elbowing her twin sister in the ribs. “We came back to the cabin before heading out to the ropes course, heard Ben and Sasha talking, and couldn’t help eavesdropping.”

“You can’t break up with me!” Dawn squawked, reaching across the gap between our beds and whacking me in the upper arm.

I groaned and started rubbing my forehead, mentally thinking, ‘I wanted to have this discussion in private.’

Dawn glared at me with an expression that plainly said, Don’t be a stupid fucking moron thinking you’re gonna break up with me and we wouldn’t NEED to have any discussion at all!

I winced, thinking, ‘Didn’t we just talk about you not calling me that anymore?’

Dawn’s eyes popped open wide, she winced, and immediately looked contrite while giving me a look that said, I’m sorry. You’re right, you’re right. That was the last time I’ll ever say that, I promise.

‘Thank you.’

Ohhh this is so fucked up. You’re right, you’re right. Our relationship really has gone to shit.

‘It hasn’t gone to shit. This is a speed-bump, that’s all. We’ll get through this. Together.’

Get through this how? By breaking up? I fail to see how that would make everything better.

‘I told you: I want to have that discussion in private.’

Doesn’t really get any more private than what we’re doing right now.

I smirked. ‘The others are probably getting really, really confused right now by the way we keep staring at each other.’

Dawn smirked back. Totally. This shouldn’t even be humanly possible, right?

‘I really have no idea how we keep doing it. But we keep doing it.’

Because you’re my soulmate forever. Because I love you and we belong together. Because you mean more to me than anything or anyone in the whole wide world.

‘I know that. I cherish that.’

We don’t need to get married on paper. You already ARE my husband, alright? In the only place it counts: my heart.

‘’Til death do us part.’

Dawn smiled warmly, leaned in, and gave me a sweet, tender kiss.

“Annnnd this is why everyone believes you two belong together,” Summer stated emphatically.

Dawn and I split apart and then both looked back at her.

“Everyone saw that, right?” Summer pointed back and forth between me and Dawn. “The communication with just their eyes? The way they were on the brink of getting mad at each other for a second, but then did that little mind-meld thing and ended up kissing?”

“Of course we saw it,” June stated flatly.

“You haven’t been around as long as we have,” Adrienne drawled.

“It just starts seeming normal after a while,” Eden added.

“Why again did you ever want to break up with her?” Sasha queried to me.

“Because first and foremost, she deserves better than binding herself to me for the rest of our lives without any future hope of finding a romantic partnership for herself.” I turned my attention to address Dawn directly. “You deserve to live a full life with a husband who will love you and prioritize you. But as long as you keep yourself in this existential limbo between being fully romantic with me and not… you’ll never be able to move on and find yourself a husband like that. Really, this is no different than when I had to cut off Eden in order to give her the time and space she needed to move on from me.”

“Still mad at you about that!” Eden called from across the room.

But I kept my focus on Dawn. “The phrase ‘break up’ is one I never should’ve used. I do honestly think we need to ‘take a break’, though. I never cut Eden off completely, just like I’ll never cut you off completely either. But you’ve been through this before with her. You’ve had these same discussions with her, reminding her that I could never be happy with her growing up into an old spinster saving herself for me for the rest of her life. It would be a life half-lived. Do I really need to explain the same to you?”

Dawn rolled her eyes and shook her head. “This is the part where I wanna call you a… an SFM… but I promised you I wouldn’t call you that anymore. Can I call you an idiot? Can I say that I’ll love you forever, but you’re an idiot?”

“Can we just not do name-calling at all?”

She sighed, took my hands in hers, and squeezed them tightly while taking deep, calming breaths. And only after she felt like she’d found her Zen did Dawn finally look me in the eyes and state quite plainly, “I am NOT letting you break up with me or ‘take a break’ or whatever you want to call it. If I’m in your bed, naked and sweaty and rubbing my moist pussy while begging you to ram it into me, are you really saying you’ll turn me down? And after you’ve finished filling me up so full of your sperm that it feels like it’s overflowing and oozing out of my pores, are you really saying you won’t whisper into my ear how much you love me?”

“Uhhh… well…”

“Because I have no intention of ever NOT telling you how much I love you. You might get to ultimately decide who you’re marrying whether I agree with you or not, but you don’t get to decide how I feel about you. And unless you think you can somehow kick me out of The Nest, I am NOT going to behave and go along with any crackpot plan that leaves me on the outside looking in, best friend consolation prize or not.”

Emma elbowed Eden and nodded forward, muttering, “See, you just needed to have more resolve.”

“Do NOT give her bad ideas,” I scolded, pointing a warning finger straight at Emma. Turning back to Dawn, I said, “I never meant breaking up forever. Just… taking a break for a few months, maybe, like Eden.”

“No deal.”

“One month.”

“Fuck no.”

“Babe, we have to.”

“No we don’t,” Dawn insisted. “Living my life by your side but unmarried is NOT the half-lived life disaster you’re thinking. I’m not your sister, for one thing. Eden would never be able to walk around in public, holding your hand, kissing you softly, so clearly in love with you that she simply couldn’t hold it inside any longer who snuggle up by your side with such obvious adoration that it would be clear for the entire world to see just how much she truly--”

“Can you NOT rub it in right now, please?” Eden complained loudly.

Dawn shot my baby sister an apologetic look and then turned back to me. “This is NOT the same situation as you and Eden. There are no societal rules restricting me from loving you as much as I want. There are no societal rules requiring me to legally marry you on paper in order to be your wife.”

I waggled my head. “Well… there kinda are. That’s just how the world works.”

“Excuse me,” Sasha snorted. “Out of everyone in this room, which one of us just spent more than five months actually traveling the globe learning how the world actually works, hmm?”

Arching an eyebrow, I drawled, “Your point?”

“After meeting hundreds of new people across dozens of different cultures,” Sasha explained, “I’ve seen love in many different forms: straight couples, gay couples, open relationships, polyamorous triples and quads and even more. I learned about compersion and sharing. I met horny singles and deeply committed pairs. I lived with a harem not unlike this one. I spent some time with two sisters who love each other quite romantically and intend to spend the rest of their lives together as monogamously faithful wives. I stayed a few nights with a brother/sister couple that moved to another country so they could get married in secret. I even spent a night with a happily married couple that just so happens to not be interested in having sex, not even with each other. And in all my travels, you know what I learned?”

“What’s that?”

“That there’s no one-size-fits-all to love. There are no rules that you’re supposed to love someone as a best friend but not a wife. There are no rules you’re supposed to only love one person at a time. There are no rules that you’re not supposed to love a family member.”

I narrowed my eyes. “Pretty sure there ARE rules about that last one.”

Sasha waggled her head. “Okay, legal rules yes, but love itself is not so limited in its scope.”

“Preach, girl, preach!” Eden enthused.

I sighed wearily at Sasha. “Can you stop encouraging her? Get to the point.”

“A question more than a point.” Sasha’s eyebrows went up. “Why are you being so obstinate about needing a wife on paper when Dawn clearly loves you as a wife in her heart?”

I shook my head and looked back at Dawn. “Why are you being so obstinately against being my wife on paper when you so clearly love me as a wife in your heart?”

“I just don’t give a shit about the paper, alright?” Dawn muttered defensively.

“I think it’s clear you DO give a shit. In fact, you give a LOT of shits about that paper, and in fact give so many shits about it that you’re adamantly OPPOSED to the paper to the point of insisting we’ll NEVER get the paper. Why is that?”

Dawn narrowed her eyes. “I thought you already understood that when we talked this morning at the clearing.”

“I understand THAT getting legally married would make you freak the fuck out and crack under the pressure. I still don’t entirely understand WHY.” I spread my hands out to her. “And even though we’ve already agreed to never get that piece of paper, I still want to help you get over whatever fear is causing that aversion in the first place.”

“I know, I know…” Dawn bowed her head and clenched her eyes shut, looking like she’d rather do ANYTHING than answer that question. Summer started rubbing her shoulder with a look of concern.

Leaning forward, I asked, “Why are you SO adamantly against wearing a bracelet or a ring?”

Head still bowed, Dawn took deep, calming breaths. Eventually, she raised her head and glanced around at everyone around the room before returning back to me. And only after collecting herself once more did she finally begin, “I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again: It’s important to me that my love for you has zero external factors keeping us together. No stainless-steel bracelets with ‘Ben Forever’ stenciled on the band. No promise rings. No wedding rings. No tattoos. No government piece of paper. I don’t want a formal girlfriend title. I don’t want a formal wife title. I don’t want an endearingly unique nickname like Tiger or Sweetheart or Sunshine. My love for you is pure. My love for you is unconditional. My love for you is because I love you and is NOT because our fucking parents have told us since birth that we’re soulmates who belong together, alright?!?”

Dawn was breathing hard, clearly emotional, her normally sky-blue eyes dark and stormy at the moment. I glanced at Summer, and Adrienne and Sasha, and Kim and June, and finally Eden and Emma, and only then did I bring my gaze back to my best friend.

“I don’t want to prove my love for you is real,” Dawn stated wearily. “I want to get to the point where I tell you I love you and you say, ‘Yes, I know.’”

“Yes, I know you love me.”

“I know you do. That’s why to ME… I like our relationship exactly as it is.” Dawn took a deep breath and squeezed my hands. “I can spend all week at my parents’ house and never hear your voice or have any contact with you except for a few texts, and I know that you know I love you more than life itself and would drop everything in a heartbeat to come rush to your side if you needed me. There’s nobody out there saying, ‘Oh, well she’s his girlfriend. Of course she loves him.’ There’s nobody out there saying, ‘Oh, of course his wife loves him.’ Look, she’s wearing a bracelet that says, ‘Ben Forever’ on it. Of course she loves him.’”

I frowned. “Is this really about whether or not other people outside of this circle believe you love me?”

Dawn rubbed her forehead like she had a migraine and muttered, “No, no. I’m saying this all wrong. It has nothing to do with anyone else and everything to do with you and me. Like… okay… I’ve been at my internship for a few weeks, right? Has it ever crossed your mind… even once… that I might’ve cheated on you by hooking up with some hot guy working at Apple?”

I blinked. “Uhhh, no.”

“See? That’s faith in me. It’s important to me that you know with a hundred and ten percent certainty that I would NEVER do that to you.”

I nodded. “Well you did also get that fake wedding band.”

Dawn clapped her hand over her forehead. “Wait, do you only believe I’ve been faithful to you because you know I got the fake ring? Fuck. That completely defeats the purpose. I’ll throw it away as soon as I get back home.”

“No, no. Don’t do that.” I took a deep breath. “My faith in you was solid well before I found out you had a fake ring. Seriously… I trust you. I have faith in you. I know you’d never cheat on me.”

“Because it would be cheating on you, right? You know that. Because you know I’ve committed to you, and--”

“And whether or not you have an official title,” I interjected with a sigh, “you’re committed to being MY cow and don’t WANT me sharing you with anyone else.”

“Exactly!” Dawn brightened, her expression excited as I seemed to finally be getting it.

“But I don’t want to limit you to being only my cow.”

“RRRRRGGGGGHHHHH!” Dawn groaned and squeezed her head in frustration. “This is that part where I want to call you expletive-filled names again!”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I promised you I’d have faith and let you choose for yourself on that stuff.”

“THANK you…” Dawn grunted in a tone that was anything but thankful. And a moment later I heard in the back of my head. Stupid fucking moron…

‘I heard that!’ I thought quite hard at her.

Dawn winced. I didn’t SAY it… Not technically…

All I could do was chuckle with a rueful grin.

“This is my choice,” Dawn stated emphatically. “I am NOT a single woman. I do NOT have the right to hook up with whomever I want. I’m your best friend for the public and we’ll never get married, but I am your fucking wife in my heart, I belong to you and only you. And that’s a sacred vow just between ME and YOU and NOBODY ELSE. Nothing else! No government paperwork dictating that we’re together in the eyes of the law. No tangible rings or bracelets or tattoos professing my love on my behalf as if what I feel in my heart isn’t sufficient. No external titles defining us as a couple. Just me and you… My Ben.”

I took a deep breath and nodded slowly. Leaning forward, I took both of her hands in mine again and looked at her seriously before saying back, “My Dawn.”

“To have and to hold,” she stated sincerely.

“From this day forward,” I continued.

“For better, for worse.”

“For richer, for poorer.”

“In sickness and in health.”

“To love and to cherish.”

Dawn smiled. “‘Til death do us part.”

“I do.”

Her smile broadened. “I do.” And she sighed as if a million pounds of angst and weight had suddenly dropped off her shoulders.

And then we kissed.

And we kissed.

And we kissed.

And we kissed.

And then Summer started hugging us from behind. And then Adrienne was wrapped around me. And then Sasha, and then Kim and June, and even Eden and Emma came down from their top bunk to wrap their arms around us.

Dawn started crying. Summer started crying. Adrienne and Sasha started crying. Fuck, -I- started crying.

And then Kim squeaked cutely, “Too dark! Too dark!”

Everyone laughed, the bundle of hugs started separating, and as I opened my eyes, I found the girls all continuing to laugh while wiping the tears from their eyes. Even June looked rather misty-eyed.

Dawn squeezed my hands and gave me a serious look. “I love you. I will ALWAYS love you. You ARE my soulmate. You’re my eternal lover. And you’re my best friend. But we’re never getting that piece of paper, alright?”

I nodded my understanding. “I don’t need the piece of paper. There’s only one thing I do want, really.”

“And what’s that?”

“Please just let me in.”

Dawn took a deep breath and exhaled, nodding slowly. “I promise.”

I smiled quite happily. And then we kissed again.

“Okay…” Summer began out of the blue, after it felt like Dawn and I had been kissing for what felt like ten minutes but must’ve been more like thirty seconds. “So now that that’s all cleared up and we know for a fact that Dawn’s not marrying him, who’s up next?”

Sasha elbowed Adrienne again.

****

“I feel the need to point out we still don’t know exactly why Dawn is so adamantly against external symbols of her internal love,” June stated into the awkward silence.

Despite Sasha’s elbow, Adrienne hadn’t been particularly inclined to start talking. We all sort of looked at her for a moment while she merely rolled her eyes and then silently glared at Sasha, and then June decided to fill in the void.

“I mean, I happen to like being Kim’s girlfriend,” June continued. “And now that we’re having this discussion, I feel like it’s really, really important that I go home and tell my parents I’m in a lesbian relationship and that Kim makes me very, very happy.”

“Aww, that’s so sweet.” Kim smiled and patted June’s knee.

June blushed at the touch before sitting up straight and giving both me and Dawn expectant looks.

Dawn winced and took a deep breath, clearly trying to gather herself, but I cleared my throat, squeezed my soulmate’s hand, and mentally told her, ‘I got this.’

“You don’t know Dawn’s history,” I began. “And it’s understandable that you don’t know why she’s so firmly opposed to external symbols of her internal love, but I think I do now. Finally, I do. So I need to apologize to Dawn for repetitively asking ‘why’ when I should’ve known the answer all along.”

Dawn shook her head. “No need to apologize. I get it. I really was deflecting, I guess in part because I didn’t really understand it myself.”

Turning my attention back to June, I continued, “While you’ve heard the stories about me and Dawn growing up as best friends since birth, you don’t know the external pressure she felt from everyone’s… assumption… that we were destined soulmates who had always belonged together. For reasons I’m not going to bother rehashing right now, she created a ‘Perfect Dawn’ ideal in her head that she felt obligated to living up to. Once we finally got together as a romantic couple at the end of our sophomore year, our parents told us they were so happy, and her mom started calling her with baby name suggestions like it was a done deal and we were already pregnant or something. Admittedly, -I- thought it was a done deal and formally asked her parents for permission to marry her. And it felt like everyone was expecting us to live happily ever after.”

“We were,” Adrienne drawled.

“I wasn’t ready for all that yet,” Dawn said softly. “I cracked. I fucked up. And I’ve been trying to make up for it ever since.”

“You have,” Adrienne insisted. “You’ve more than earned your way back into that place in his life. You deserved to be his titled wife back then, and you deserve the title now. The way you can get into each other’s heads. The obvious affection now. Even the faith you have in each other now whenever you’re apart. He’s always belonged to you. I knew it back when I was dating him in college, and I knew it before he and I got engaged at Morris Camp. The phrase is ‘My Ben’ because he is now, and forever will be, yours.”

“There’s a piece of his heart which will always belong to me, yes,” Dawn agreed before letting go of my hands and turning her attention to Adrienne. “But Ben’s love is not zero-sum. His love can grow to encompass us all. And more to the point, there’s a piece of his heart which will always belong to you. Truth be told, I think you should be his wife.”

“Me?”

“The two of you are starting to get into each other’s heads now; I can tell. The obvious affection. The loyalty and knowledge that you’ll always be each other’s Rock. He always wanted to get back together with you. You know exactly why he went so long never having another girlfriend after the end of your engagement; he was still clinging to a shred of hope you’d take him back after he’d hurt you. He even went out of his way to avoid doing anything with Summer at the beginning of this year because he was still in love with you.”

“You’re proving my point that I don’t deserve him.” Adrienne shook her head bitterly. “I’ve had my chances, and I disappointed him repeatedly. He gave me the promise ring and I panicked, gave the ring back, and fled to Grace. When I came back from New York because I needed him more than ever, he welcomed me back with open arms and even accepted me into his relationship with Sasha. What did I do? I fucking stole Sasha. I stopped working hard on our relationship, assuming he’d always be there for me. Out of sight, out of mind. Even still, he still held onto that shred of hope, waiting for me, and I didn’t take him back even though I knew Sasha didn’t want to marry me. When Sasha left and I had another chance, I didn’t seize the opportunity and backed off to let him be with Summer. I don’t deserve him, plain and simple. I just don’t. Summer’s his girlfriend now. She deserves to become his titled wife.”

“I wouldn’t say ‘no’ if he asked, obviously,” Summer interjected. “But at the same time, I know he and I aren’t at that level of commitment just yet. We aren’t yet at our four-month anniversary, and his emotional bonds to both of you are so much stronger than they are to me.”

Dawn and Adrienne, the objects of Summer’s last statement, glanced at each other for a moment. And then Dawn spoke up, stating, “Even if you two aren’t there yet, the job is yours to lose.”

I made a face. “Can we not call it a ‘job’?”

“Being Ben’s wife would never be a ‘job’ to me; it would be a dream come true.” Summer turned to smile at me. “Putting my cards on the table: I love you, Ben. I want to marry you someday. I sincerely hope that is our ultimate Destiny together. You’re the man of my dreams. You’re warm, loving, generous, and kind. You’re supportive and affectionate… and you can make my body sing. And on top of all that, you’re my hero who quite literally saved me from being kidnapped by my violent ex-boyfriend.”

My shoulders slumped. “And simultaneously failed to save your mom.”

Summer sighed and canted her head to the side. “I’ll never be able to convince you to let go of your guilt. Only you can do that. But I can help, and Iris can help, and the rest of us can do our best to help you realize that what’s past is past and cannot be undone, and that the outcome could have been much worse had you not done what you did.”

“You’re right: I can never know what the outcome truly might’ve been with had I done things differently. The current outcome is the only outcome we have, and in this outcome, I left you without a mom and I feel like it’s my cosmic responsibility to take care of you from now on. I promised your mom I’d take care of you from now on.”

“And even I know that’s a shitty reason to marry me,” Summer said softly. “So I take back my earlier statement: I would say ‘no’ if you asked me to marry you, or at least I’d say ‘no’ if I wasn’t totally convinced you weren’t asking me solely because of a promise you made to my mom.”

“I’d never ask solely because of a promise I made to your mom; I hope you know that. That means that if I ever do ask you, you’ll know it’s for real.”

“I guess we’ll just have to find out… in another three years or so.” Summer’s eyes sparkled. “That’s about how long it took Everett to propose to Paige, right?”

“Assuming we’re all still alive in three years,” Adrienne muttered with a rueful sigh.

“Don’t jinx it,” Dawn warned.

“Life is precious, true,” I stated firmly. “And there are no guarantees we’ll all be together by this time tomorrow. But at the same time, I’m not going to rush into snap judgments about things like who I’m gonna marry out of panic that I’m gonna be dead soon.”

“Fair enough,” Dawn agreed.

“In the meantime, I intend to be the very best girlfriend I can be for you,” Summer continued quite intently. “That’s the role I want in my life, doing whatever I can to make you happy and in turn derive my own happiness. Doctors and psychologists may call that a disorder, but it’s who I am. Making you happy makes ME happy; I’ve accepted that about myself. I want to please you in the bedroom and let you take pleasure from my body. I want to cook and clean and take care of your domestic needs to free up your time so you can take pleasure from my body. And I want to be a good listener to your troubles and be the glue-girl in your relationships with the others to help keep your emotional life running smoothly--”

“And free up your time so you can take pleasure from her body,” Dawn interjected with a giggle.

“I’m sensing a pattern here,” June drawled.

“Thanks, Captain Obvious,” Emma muttered.

Summer took a deep breath and turned her attention over to Adrienne, speaking quite directly to her as she finished, “Ben’s happiness means everything to me. And if I decide his happiness means being married to you, I will do everything in my power to make THAT happen.”

Adrienne immediately held her hands up defensively and shook her head. “Not happening. You’re his girlfriend.”

Summer’s eyes narrowed. “He has more than one. Is that a crime?”

The question rocked Adrienne’s head back, and startled me as well. Summer had asked it in the exact same tone and cadence as when Adrienne had said those same words to Detective Franklin the morning Yvaine had died.

Summer’s eyebrows went up. “You were ready and willing to assume that mantle and take that public role in his life when it mattered the most.”

“I just needed an excuse so they wouldn’t kick me out.”

“Your relationship status had no bearing on whether or not police detectives would let you stick around,” Summer insisted. “You love him. He means the world to you. I understand now why Dawn refuses a formal title, but c’mon A.D., he’s your boyfriend. You’re his girlfriend, as much as me.”

“I don’t want to be his girlfriend.”

“Bullshit.”

Dawn and I exchanged a quick glance at each other, surprised by the vehemence in Summer’s tone. Adrienne and Sasha looked pretty shocked as well. At least I’d seen this level of resolve from her once before, back when she’d first insisted that she and Yvaine should cross the line.

“C’mon A.D.,” Summer continued just as firmly. “Cards on the table here. Try and lie to us again that you don’t want to be his girlfriend again.”

Adrienne swallowed thickly, the normally dominant lioness of the pride momentarily cowed by typically meek Summer. Her eyes were downcast as she mumbled, “I don’t deserve him.”

“Why don’t you let me judge what I do and don’t deserve?” I asked quietly.

Adrienne shook her head. “You deserve Summer: the one who’s already stated that your happiness means everything to her. If not Summer, you deserve Dawn. I don’t care what the fuck you two thought you agreed on this morning; two minutes ago you two literally recited wedding vows and said, ‘I do’. She’s the one deep down you really want anyway. And on Valentine’s Day when you had all three of us together at the same time, you flat out said you wanted to marry her.”

“Only because he believed you’re a lesbian at heart,” Dawn interjected.

“I AM a lesbian at heart,” Adrienne insisted.

“Lesbian-plus-one. Am I wrong in that?” Dawn arched her eyebrow. “When you stop and consider all the people you’ve ever felt romantic about… is the list not a bunch of girls… plus Ben? Sasha, Caroline, Grace, Candy, however many other girls you’ve crushed on… and Ben… are you gonna sit there and tell me that if you were to rank all those options in order, that Ben isn’t your Number One?”

“Ben’s her Number One,” Sasha stated helpfully and then yelped when Adrienne pinched her.

Adrienne finished glaring at Sasha and then sighed. “He still chose you.”

“She freaking sang, ‘My Valentine’ to me,” I muttered with a sigh. “It was an exceptionally romantic moment, but that doesn’t mean I don’t love you too. I told all this to Kim that same day, and I have to assume she told all this to you afterwards, that I didn’t actually rank Dawn higher than you. The letter order had everything to do with probability because yes, I honestly thought you were girl-romantic. You even told me - in front of Dayna and Monique I might add - that even if you didn’t end up with Sasha, you still thought your ultimate love would be another woman. But now we’re getting into rankings again and I REALLY don’t want to get stuck on that hamster wheel again so I’m starting over right now.”

I paused for a moment to catch my breath while waving my hands back and forth to ward off anybody else from saying anything that would make me lose my train of thought.

“I’m not choosing any Number Ones anymore,” I said finally. “I’m not making any Plan A’s, B’s, or C’s. I’m not ranking you, not anymore. I’m not even choosing any ONE of you. I’m greedy, alright? I want - no, I NEED - all three of you in my life! All three! Hell, I’d love to have ALL of you in this room stay in my life until the end of time - Sasha, Kim, June, Eden, Emma - but I canNOT lose my three Nestmates. Period.”

“You’ll never lose me,” Dawn stated firmly, interlacing her fingers through mine and giving them a squeeze. “Not even if you try to break up with me. I won’t let you.”

“I wasn’t trying to break up with you, just take a…” I rubbed my forehead. “You know what? Forget it.”

Dawn smirked. “I belong to you, not because of a bracelet on my wrist or a ring on my finger, but because I feel it in my heart. You’re my best friend… my pair-bonded twin… forever.”

“-I- belong to you,” Summer added seriously. “Not because I lost my mom, but because I love you, I need you, and I want to be with you.”

“And -I- belong to you, Tiger,” Adrienne stated seriously, if tiredly. “As much as Dawn or Summer belong to you, although it’s not a competition and I really shouldn’t have put it that way. Cards on the table? Fine.”

She took a deep breath, clearly gathering herself. There was moisture in her eyes, and when Sasha slipped her hand into hers, Adrienne squeezed it like her life depended on it.

But then she inhaled, sat up straight, and all of a sudden my Tigress was right there. Golden eyes aflame, crackling energy making her hair thicken and expand, and sheer force of personality oozing out of her pores, Adrienne’s presence commanded the room as she set her jaw and stated quite seriously, “I LOVE you, Tiger, and forgive me for leaning on catchphrases but I’m pretty emotionally exhausted right now and they work for me so I’m gonna keep using them. I’ll love you Forever. And I’ll love you Always. I DO want to bear your children, and if we’re going to go with Dawn’s definition of wife being what the heart feels inside, then I love you as a wife. You are my husband, the only husband I’ll ever have, the only MAN I’ll ever have, for the rest of my life. Etch that in stone. Gimme the fucking bracelet and lemme engrave it. You know what? Yes, I WANT a tattoo with ‘Tiger’s Pet’ permanently inked onto my body so you can always look at it while you’re sodomizing the shit outta me and know that I’ll always be yours. Whaddaya think, a tramp stamp? Or maybe ‘Tiger’s’ on my left buttcheek and ‘Pet’ on my right buttcheek? Too much? Hmm, the script might look funny when I get old and my ass starts stretching, so I’m thinking the tramp stamp is the way to go.”

I furrowed my eyebrows. “What about your modeling pics?”

Adrienne shrugged. “Let the world know I belong to you. I’m good with it. And it would fit with the Tigress brand anyway.”

Summer leaned forward. “But would you marry him?”

Adrienne winced immediately, and that force of personality dimmed. “I… uhhh…”

“You did just say you wanted to let the world know you belong to him,” Summer pointed out.

Adrienne’s grimace deepened. “I had my chance. I swore I’d never steal him from you.”

“It’s not stealing him if I’m giving.”

“I’m not a prize that can be given away,” I grumbled.

Summer blushed. “Sorry. I didn’t mean--”

“Look, I know everyone’s heart is in the right place,” I continued, “but I’m tired of you all playing hot potato saying, ‘You take him.’ ‘No, you take him!’ ‘No, YOU take him!’”

“I’ll take him!” Eden volunteered with her hand raised.

Everyone glared at her.

Eden put her hand down.

“New plan,” I began, turning to look at everyone. “Nobody marries me, alright? I told Iris already that I was completely over the whole question about which one of you I’m going to marry. It’s become a goal without meaning and I have no interest in getting married just because I’m supposed to get married, alright? Let’s go back to Adrienne’s original Nest idea, surrounded by everyone I love and never having to worry about feeling lonely again.”

Adrienne arched an eyebrow. “You mean the plan that ended with you waking up feeling ‘empty’ at not having a titled wife? That plan?”

“It’s just a piece of paper. I said I felt empty in the moment, but at the end of the day, it’s what’s in our hearts that matters the most.”

I squeezed Dawn’s hand before regarding Summer and then bringing my gaze back to Adrienne and extending my other hand out to her as well. Adrienne didn’t hesitate, reaching out to take my hand, and it made me smile.

“Cards on the table: my turn,” I continued. “I want all three of you. There’s no one-size-fits-all to love, and each of you fills a different role in my life. I can’t do this with just one of you. I don’t WANT to spend my life with any one of you as ‘primary’ over the others. The four of us together is what makes these relationships work, plus Kim and BJ, June, Sasha, and the twins. And Brandi and Dayna. And Brooke and DJ.”

I looked over everyone around the room, and they all smiled back at me.

Bringing my attention back to Adrienne, I squeezed her hand and stated, “I want you in my life for the rest of my life. As my girlfriend, if I may be so bold as to ask. Maybe even someday as my wife, whether or not we end up making that official with government paperwork and everything. Maybe we WILL do the ceremony in the living room of The Nest where the four of us pledge to be together Forever and Always. Not now or anything because goodness knows we’re not ready for it. But one day, who knows? Because when I stop and close my eyes and try to picture my Happily Ever After, you’re ALL right by my side.”

Adrienne smirked. “You ARE greedy. Good thing I love to share.”

“Good thing you love the way I eat your pussy,” Dawn drawled lightly.

“Definitely love the way you eat my pussy,” Adrienne giggled back.

Squeezing Adrienne’s hand again, I took a deep breath and looked her in the eyes. “We’ve already talked about raising a family together. If that’s still what you want, I just want to ask, do you love me as the only husband you’ll ever have and want to bear my children?”

She blinked twice before giving me a firm look and stating with absolute certainty, “Yes. Absolutely.”

I squeezed Dawn’s hand and glanced at her. “Do YOU love me as the only husband you’ll ever have and want to bear my children?”

My soulmate smiled and squeezed my hand back. “I do.”

I turned my head to Summer. “Do yo--”

“Yes! Yes! Yes!” she cut me off and then hugged her arms around both me and Dawn.

I chuckled and glanced across at the bunk bed. Before I could say anything, June raised her hands and said, “No kids. Nope. Never happening. Nuh-uh.”

Sasha chuckled and called from across the room. “What she said!”

“Isn’t anybody gonna ask if -I- want to bear Ben’s children?” Eden whined.

“No,” Emma replied flatly.

“I’m kidding, I’m kidding,” Eden laughed.

Emma slapped her sister. “Kidding-not-kidding?”

Eden blushed, sighed, and dropped her elbows onto her knees with a glum expression.

Kim shrugged and smiled. “I’ve got mine, watashi no shujin.”

“I’m also not into the whole husband bit,” Sasha added. “Don’t get me wrong, you’re still the only man I’ve ever truly loved, and I sincerely hope there’s a piece of your heart that will always belong to me the way there’s a big piece of my heart that will always be yours. But I’m just not feeling the ‘settle down and be married’ bit. You said I can be the cool auntie who brings nice presents from other countries back for the kids, right? And all of you can be a constant source of warmth, friendship, and spectacular orgasms for me to come home to and then let me go. That’s basically what I want from all of you. You understand.”

I smiled and nodded. “We understand.”

June chuckled and called from across the room. “What she said!”

Everybody cracked up.

Adrienne took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. “So how is this gonna work exactly? I mean, we all laid our cards on the table, right? We all know where each other stands and what we each want from our relationships with him? What now?”

“Now we get naked and fuck each other silly!” Eden enthused, her hand back up in the air.

“Not yet, rugrat,” I growled. “Settle down.”

Eden put her hand back down.

“I’m his best friend, his wife in spirit, his soulmate,” Dawn stated firmly while squeezing my hand.

“I’m his devoted girlfriend and his sex slave,” Summer added, taking my other hand and squeezing it. “And it occurs to me you haven’t been using your sex slave very often lately.”

I blinked. “Uhhh… promise I’ll use you as a sex slave more often?”

Summer rolled her eyes and gave me a disappointed look.

I cleared my throat and sat up straighter. “Prepare yourself, Pet. Master will definitely use and abuse his Pet more often. Understand?”

“Yes, Master!” Summer chirped happily.

“So what does all that make me?” Adrienne asked, holding her hands up with an uncertain expression on her face.

“You’re officially his girlfriend again,” Sasha stated firmly, patting her leg. “You can get the tattoo if you really want, make a formal press release if you want, or do absolutely nothing. But know in your heart that he loves you, you love him, not just as each other’s rock, but romantically with all the bells and whistles therein.”

Adrienne still looked worried and turned her attention to Summer. “I refused the girlfriend title because I didn’t want to muscle you out.”

Summer’s eyes narrowed as she stated firmly, “You won’t. I’m stronger than I appear, especially when it comes to him. I’m rather attached to him, you see, and nothing short of the end of the world can stop me.”

Adrienne smiled at that pronouncement, and she nodded her head slowly. In the meantime, Dawn and Summer had joined me at the edge of the big bed and now sandwiched me in-between them. Sasha leaned over to hug Adrienne. June and Kim were smiling, and Eden and Emma seemed pretty pleased as well.

And that’s when Adrienne got a rather… curious… look on her face, along with a really, really big smile.

I smirked and arched an eyebrow. “I know that look. What terrifying little thought just popped into your head now?”

Adrienne laughed and waved me off. “Nothing crazy. Nothing terrifying. Actually, I wanted to ask Summer her thoughts about something.”

Summer blinked. “Me?”

“Well, everything going on the last couple of weeks made me step up my game talking to Jeff Lee and Kaitlyn about designing a new big compound for all of us with high-tech security features and such. I’ve got a couple of sites picked out, but the place itself would be custom-built, from the ground up. It’ll take more than a year to build, but hopefully be ready by the time you, Dawn, and Kim finish your MBAs.”

Summer blinked. “Oh… cool. But… what does that have to do with me?”

“I was just wondering, in honor of your mom, what do you think of calling our new place, ‘Stardust’?”

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