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Hey guys 👋 How are you all?

So,

As promised,

The calm is over 🥲

⛈️

⚠️ CONTENT WARNINGS ⚠️

Sexual content, Homophobia, emotional distress/ panic attack

Hope you like this episode ❤️‍🩹

In the next few episodes you guys will get something you’ve been asking 👀

Files

Comments

Becshlec

During my billionth read through I realized that Kai says “this doesn’t have to mean anything” and Axel is kind of like “of course it doesn’t” and part of me wonders if Axel’s anxiety is telling him Kai is just playing with him and it really doesn’t mean anything even though part of him wants it to mean something… yknow?

Anie M

I'm worried poor Axel was S abused when he was young and that's why he's so against it. He might be gay but because of what happened to him he fully rejects it. I think maybe the "regret it" line was a trigger that sent him back and that's why he seemed okay until Kai said that

Ivette

So I think axel suffer from a Truma that happened to him… like I knew but seeing more panels like these is making it more towards 100% confirmation for me

Vivi

Now that makes me think about why axels dad is in prison in the first place.

Saelune

Oh no, we’re back at square one 😢 I really hoped Axel wouldn’t actually freak out but here we are 😔 Poor thing 🥺 His reaction was really extreme this time and to me it doesn’t look like simple internalised homophobia but something more serious 😥 I hope we get to see his past in the next episode and that Kai will comfort him so they can somehow talk it through! I’d really hate for him to shut Kai out again 😩 All that progress between them!! 😭

artsy_amusing

Interesting...very interesting. It's no shock that Axel reacted this way. It's always been a known thing that he exhibits strong internalized homophobia. What's interesting is that he can perform oral sex on Kai with no problem and not freak out about it, but in this case he's now on the receiving end and experienced actual pleasure. Queue the freak-out, queue the denial. Axel can compartmentalize it more when he's the one providing the service, but when he himself "gets off"...NOW it's a matter of accepting it. This will definitely break Axel first before he comes to realize there's no one aound to ridicule and/or abuse him for his true feelings.

Izzie

Axel come on my dude I thought u had grown no back tracking my heart shattered for Kai’s face axel should by at this point understand Kai is a safe person to be around / with axel would probably be dead if Kai didn’t protect him now I understand axels shock my ex broke me so bad that touching my hand made me freak I ended up and still am in my own eyes a bag of meat disposal when not needed but axel baby come on that’s enough just accept ur self and work with Kai to better yourself or you are going to live up to my t-shirt which says men never fail to disappoint me

ASIEEEEE

You did not.

Kelly klarkson

I’m happy with how this episode turned out. I wasn’t expecting it but it did bring the right about of realism to the story without overdoing it. What I like most is it gave Kai an opportunity to actually see Axels fear for what it is. I think Kai has underestimated the issue the entire time. It also showed Kai being truly remorseful for having Axel go through with these things. Axel getting to hear Kai desperately apologize when there is nothing in it for him? Axel wanted this deal to be something he had no choice over. What they just did wasn’t something he could rationalize as something he just didn’t want to do. This is what is so traumatizing for him. Kai was a little clueless until now and not taking Axel that seriously.

Skibidi Bonnet

Poor Axel, and on my birthday too 😭😭 I hope he opens the door and let's Kai comfort him

Kelly klarkson

What id be interested in seeing next is Kai fully just confessing. “I know. I know this didn’t mean anything to you. I just wanted you to understand my feelings. But you don’t feel the same way about me. That’s fine. I shouldn’t have ever done any of that.” Things like that.

Misa

Oh axel...

Kirito

I smell trauma past and the next _dad of the year_ medal.

♡ShutUp☆I'mReadingBL♡

Sad, but not surprising. Can't unearth these kinds of things without some pain. Whatever has caused Axel's internalized homophobia, it's deep and it's cutting. I know we all just wanted Axel to have a sexual awakening and immediately accept his feelings, but that probably wouldn't be very realistic. Axel needs time to process, and hopefully soon he'll be ready to talk about it

Ifi <3

I just know it's something with his dad

Aliye Yıldız

Fuck, all the time i wanna only read about them

Vee_Breeze

I love how a few months ago everyone was hating Axel and now like 95% of us have turned it to protecting him to a phone shattering degree

Dana

I love these two so so so so so so so so so fucking much I don’t feel like I care enough for Keane and onyx

Rat Rettas

It just hit me, if we thought Kai was protective before, he is most definitely going to be way more now. He may not understand the why behind Axels reaction, but I feel like seeing the fear first hand will make him much more sensitive to remarks made about Axel.

Steven M

This is exhausting.

Nataniel

IM SO SORRY FOR AXEL LIKE IM CRYING VRO😭

jinxed

Oh come on it’s Axel we ALL saw it coming, there was no way he was just gonna suddenly be okay with it

eli

guys she said we are getting what we asked for, is that axel insinuating something because that was my first thought as it was a reoccurring theme in the comments

iliveforbl

Ma heart... 💔🥹🥹

peachita

Oh god he looks so traumatized in that one panel :c... its scary and concerning.

Noemi Camerano

I just want them to be happy 💔💔 hopefully this will happen soon (spoiler: thats not gonna happen anytime soon cuz when things finally start getting somewhat better Kai’s father is gonna enter the scene I can feel it)

Becshlec

I definitely feel like we’re going to get some Axel backstory coming up, we’ve had a bit of Kai backstory so it’s time 🙏

Maisan

I think Axel was having serious inner conflict realizing that maybe he really did want it to mean something, and all his past trauma is triggered because of that & the still unclear situationship happening. Also glad to see Kai react appropriately and experience the depth of Axels fears. I think this will be a core turning point for them in a good way to become more open with each other and themselves. Because let’s face it, Kai also has some things to work through regarding his sexuality, owning it more fully and being more clear on what he wants out of this.

Wanda

🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤

PhoenixxFireblossom

Y’all, I can’t even read this one twice. I’m just gonna have to go on whatever my brain took from it the first time cuz I can’t 😭

Nikki C.

Oh no please communicate don’t shut down 😭

Saelune

I’ve been thinking about another possibility. What if Axel actually hasn’t been with anyone before or maybe he tried being with a girl but couldn’t get it up with her? And now being with Kai he realised that he actually can get hard and the fact that it happened with a man scared him and confirmed his fear that he’s into men. That would explain why he cried both now and earlier in the cabin and why he didn’t really stop Kai this time because the whole experience was new and overwhelming for him. That would also explain why he came so fast and why Kai noticing it probably triggered Axel even more, which then ended in him having a panic attack

Boba Tea

I think axel wanted to say something like “don’t you dare ever- (touch me again)” but he cut himself off and started crying because he realized he didn’t really mean it. lord I think axel really just wants to be loved. Kai and axel both come from such messed up homes and lives that their relationship to intimacy is twisted. it’s hard because Kai does want to get to know axel but axel also seems dead set on only hanging out if he’s being somehow “useful” to Kai for their deal. Meanwhile kai wants to see what makes him tick, what makes him happy, how he can get under his skin, and all of his buttons (good and bad).

AddiEverybodysDaddy

I have a feeling the words Axel is saying to Kai were words Axel had been told by his dad. I feel like his dad was abusive verbally and that’s why Axel always defensive and stuff :(

Noemi Camerano

My heart breaks seeing them like this.. Kai looked truly sorry and heartbroken, I mean I’m glad he finally understood axel is not just someone that acts like a stubborn brat and someone to mess with but still it hurts :(((( And axel my poor baby :c I can’t bear seeing him suffer anymore, what does he still have to go through to finally be happy? Now l’m really really scared and concerned for his backstory cuz I already know that’s gonna hurt like hell

Jessie23

We’re asking for COMMUNICATION! Please talk to each other 😭🙏

Ele_Smiles

Poor Axel! He all twisted up inside. This is probably why he was so messed up toward Onyx. He was attracted to him and couldn’t handle it. I hope Kai can actually be a friend and help him through this.

Kasey

Internalized homophobia 🙁💔

Lyssa4b

That is the only way it could have ended… I mentioned a long time ago that he was probably gay and was raised to hate them. Homophobic dad will do that to someone.

Nicki

Axel deserves to feel loved! I hope that Kai can help Axel!

A

It’s not letting me view the link… is there somewhere else I can access it?

gxbby

this is why consent is so important. growing to hate the whole dubcon dynamic in this series for this reason exactly. it's a situation that is familiar to me and likely other readers and imo shouldn't be romanticized at all. regardless of his internalized homophobia, i really feel bad for axel ☹️

Izzynator

The file won’t open in my browser or in the app

Jay

oh Axel... you poor poor broken boy

Josie Olson

Honestly the “it’s alright” panel at the beginning of this ep and the end of the last, is one of, if not the top frame for me. And one of the competitors is when they are looking at eachother while kissing a sec before so I don’t know but pasta def has me in a chokehold rn

Rayna

OMG I just read this and the last 3 episodes like 5 times I can’t get enough. I’m so excited to see how they develop further as the series goes on.