{OLD VERSION} The Tiger's Bourbon Chapter 7 part 2 (Patreon)

AN: Not edited for grammar. Chapter 7 Part 2: "Jungle Run" . "Gourmet Hunting For Dummies" . "What Not To Do With a Frying Pan" . It took al

AN: Not edited for grammar.

Chapter 7 Part 2: "Jungle Run" . "Gourmet Hunting For Dummies" . "What Not To Do With a Frying Pan" .

It took all of three seconds for the first of them to snap out of their stupor, and it was thankfully Lucifer.

A very gentle tap to his head woke Axel next and he matched eyes with his feline buddy urging him to move. A silent nod was shared before he ever so gently started moving them with water manipulation, casually just floating to the side and up so as not to spook their new friend.

The beasts eye followed them as if in confusion before reality finally asserted itself in its brain and it realized the tiny creatures offended it. A roar to put the previous dino to shame sent shockwaves through the water as it quickly turned toward the offenders.

“Shit. It woke up!” Axel turned up the propulsion to max and shot the two of them right back out of the water and into the chaos that was still going on outside, catching himself on a barrier in the air where nothing could easily reach him.

“Row!” Lucifer urged him forward.

“It’s ok, that thing had a shark head. We should be safe out of the wa-…”

“ROOOAARRR!”

“HOLY SHIT IT CAN BREATHE ON LAND!”

“REOW!”

Beast and man alike witnessed the giant creature shake the earth as it left the water and froze everyone else with its furious gaze. Yet it ignored them all as prey and took a deep whiff of the air to hone in on the only scent of the one it cared about, finding it frozen like all the rest, much to its satisfaction.

But in the next second its eyes narrowed as it felt like its prey was getting smaller as Axel was using his barrier to casually run without looking like he was running.

“ROAR!”

“Shit. He realized. Run!”

The beast charged straight for him, running through the horde of beasts and only mildly getting slowed down by those brave enough to fight back. Not that Axel was there to see it as he ran like hell with Lucifer still clinging to his scalp.

“Why does everything keep chasing me in this lagoon?!”

“Row.”

“I do not offend everyone.”

“Ro?” Lucifer pointed to the frying pan still in Axel’s hand.

“…I may have a problem.”

And he wasn’t referring to the charging freight train catching up behind them.

By this point most of the buzz from his booze was wearing off and Axel starting thinking clearly again. “We need to slow it down or throw it off our trail so I can check the Beast Encyclopedia. Maybe it will tell me what the hell I’m dealing with here.”

The book wasn’t always helpful, but there were dozens of entries by past hunters that came in handy in weird situations. Axel considered this a weird situation.

“Row.” Lucifer pointed to the left and Axel made out a white mark on a tree.

“Oh god, not again.”

“ROAR!”

“On second thought, let’s go.”

The charging titan was gaining ground and Axel had no choice but to bite the bullet for the second time. He ran headlong into the fifty meter zone and knew the bugs were coming out. ‘These things seem like the only thing dumb enough to attack that monster. But I’m not going through this shit again!’

The second he saw them lock on; he overcharged his flame step to launch himself ahead in an undignified flight. ‘Maximum Effort!’

“Reow!” A panicked shout rang from Lucifer that had Axel’s eyes widening. The kitten lost its grip from that movement and fell within the fifty meter range. He rolled roughly to a stop and froze in panic in an unfamiliar area as the bug armada launched his way.

“Lucifer!” Ignoring the throb in his legs, Axel kicked back toward his friend in another burst of heat, grabbing his buddy in a barrel roll before expanding his barrier in a single burst to protect them from an onslaught of insect shells.

Lucifer whined pitifully between Axel’s arms; its blue fur coated with a red from a deep cut on Axel’s shoulder where a beetle managed to clip him.

“I’m fine.” Axel grit out and hugged the kitten close. “We got to get out of here.” He ignored his injury to push himself up and run.

The shark monster barreled into the insect territory with fury in its eyes, still locked onto Axel and Lucifer’s scent and it wasn’t letting up.

Hundreds of Daikon Beetle’s crashed into its side, but despite their speed and sharp horns, they couldn’t pierce its hide as easily as it did the previous tiger.

Thankfully, Axel’s roll had put them closer to an edge of the insects range and the two were quickly out of it with the shark slowed down behind them.

“Meow.” Lucifer licked his bleeding arm in worry and Axel knew he was right to be worried. The cut was rough and the blood loss would drain him before his stamina did.

“It’s alright, Luc, that was my own fault, I should have warned you before I launched. Hop on my other shoulder, would you?”

Lucifer followed his request and Axel focused on the frying pan in his hand and rapidly heated it up. ‘This is gonna suck.’

Axel was many things in life, but being indecisive and afraid of pain weren’t one of them.

Grabbing a stick as he ran past to stick between his teeth, he bit down and firmly pressed the rounded edge of his pan on his wound.

“SHON O A BTCH.” Not being afraid of pain didn’t mean he liked pain.

Lucifer kept silent and stayed docile on his other shoulder while Axel cauterized his wound. ‘You’d think a dozen years of experience burning your hands on hot pans and boiling oil would prepare one for this, but I can’t fucking tell!’

A giant sharks head chose that moment to burst in from the side and all the pain turned to anger. “Would . you . just . fuck . off . already!” He smacked the thing in the nose with the burning pan and was shockingly awarded with a shriek of pain from the beast as it momentarily turned away, allowing Axel time to make some distance. ‘Did that hurt it, or surprise it?’

Whatever it did, Axel wasn’t sticking around to find out. He reached into his Item Box to pull out a Sakeyashi fruit and poured the alcohol over his wound with a roar of pain. “FUCK.” He had no time to be careful and practically dumped the entire thing over his shoulder, throwing the last bit into his mouth to dull the pain.

“Meow.” Lucifer’s concerned call from his other shoulder helped sober Axel up from the wave of pain. ‘I don’t care if I get myself into trouble, that’s why I came out here alone, but I’m not about to let this little one get fucked over because of my actions.’

“Luc, I’ll distract the beast. At the next pool, jump in and hide…OW, what the fuck, Luc?!” His exclamation came from a deep scratch along his cheek from an angry kitten.

“Ro!”

“What do you mean don’t be stupid?! This entire situation is stupid!”

“Reo.” It rubbed its head against Axel’s neck in a clear sign of where it was staying.

“Fine, stubborn little shit.”

“Reow.”

“That scratch hurt you know.”

“Meow.”

“Don’t try to be cute now.”

Seeing that they were a distance away from the beast, Axel finally got a chance to pull out his beast encyclopedia. “Luc, turn to the page with a picture of that fucker on it.”

He didn’t need the cat to read, but he was running and needed to use one hand to hold the frying pan for the endurance boost, so holding up the book for a picture reference was the best he could do.

Thankfully, Lucifer was a very smart feline and swiped its paw on the pages until it called out and tapped one. “Thanks, bud.”

Looking at the page, Axel winced at the capture level.

{Emerald Great Leg: Capture Level 8 – A subspecies of the oceanic Great Leg sharkadile species that is thought to have migrated to the Emerald Lagoon during a great flood. Unlike its smaller brethren, the Emerald Great Leg has grown half a size larger and is fiercely territorial, with a highly developed sense of smell to trace prey it locks onto. Their diet mainly consists of…..}

‘Not important. Get to the weakness part.’

{Emerald Great Legs are advised to be avoided, for while their meat is unrivaled among sashimi lovers, and the going price is easily 2K Yen per 100 grams, there are easier catches out there without having to bringing in multiple tanks.}

“HOW IS THAT HELPFUL?”

Axel nearly tore out the page, and then he saw the last line and did actually tear out the page.

{Please purchase our Oceanic Edition for more detailed information or find a more experienced hunter for further advice.}

“Fuck you!” He tossed the book back into his Item Box in a rage. “Where am I supposed to find an experienced hunter all the way out he…”

“Row.” Lucifer’s head tap had Axel turning his head mid-sentence to look to the left where something bright and gold stood out.

“Is that Luke?”

0000

~Five minutes earlier~

“Luke! The ground is shaking!”

“I can tell, Sam!”

“Not good.” Nathan’s calm voice cut in as he deflected a Bush Tigers claws with his giant spatula.

“Understory of the year, big guy.” Sam focused down the barrel of her rifle and hit the tiger straight in the eye. “Finally! Fucker wouldn’t stand still.”

Luke came in from the blinded side, as Nathan distracted it from the other, and brought his sword down on the beasts neck, ending the threat in one impressive slice. “Hunted.”

“Don’t say that with a straight face like it’s a catch phrase or something!” Sam’s retort had Luke’s stone cold expression melting in depression.

“You never let me pick one….”

“Because they’re lame.”

“Not lame.” Nathan carefully patted his leaders shoulder.

“Nathan…” Luke’s eyes filled with hope.

“Just not good.”

And his hope died with the snickering of Sam off to the side. “Oh shut it, both of you.” Luke rolled his shoulder with a sigh. “This was our third fight this hour. What the hell is going on around here?”

“Ground. Shaking.” Nathan looked down as if he could peer into the reasons for it while Sam approached with a serious expression.

“Luke, this isn’t normal and my gut is telling me it’s going to get worse if we stay around here.”

Luke rubbed his chin in thought and turned to Nathan. “Thoughts?”

“Big creature?”

Luke’s eyes narrowed at that as he turned to Sam. “Hey Sam, did the report say why Heavenly King Toriko was hunting in this area?”

Sam tilted her head in thought before it hit her and she began to pale. “You don’t think…”

“I think we need to pull back to be safe. We went straight north so we’re only a couple hours from the starting area. We can wait it out and come back when things calm down.”

Sam nodded and quickly ran over to grab her gear, but Nathan didn’t move and kept looking into the distance. “Luke.”

“Hm?”

“Big creature.”

“I know big guy, that’s why we’re leaving.”

A grunt came from the guy before Nathan reached over and physically turned Luke’s head to where he was looking. “Big creature.”

Trees were wildly shaking and the sounds of snapping wood and roaring was steadily growing louder.

“Oh.”

“Mn.”

“Sam…”

“Yeah?” The teams sharpshooter looked up from her work, took one look at where the other two were looking, and quickly brought out her sniper to look down her barrel. “Oh, you have got to be shitting me.”

“What is it?”

Sam looked at her team leader with a deadpan stare. “I hate you.”

“What did I do?!”

Sam pointed ahead to where a figure burst out of the foliage, dressed in rags barely covering his manhood, covered in dried blood and mud, with twigs and leaves sticking out of his hair, with bloodshot eyes, holding a dented frying pan, and with a blue furred kitten on his shoulder for some reason, Axel, the newbie hunter they met not even a day before came running with a soulful yell. “LUUKKEE!”

Even Nathan turned to look at Luke this time as the golden armored and blond haired man had a torn expression. “He really came out here….”

“If whatever is chasing him doesn’t kill us, I’m muzzling you.”

“Noted.”

0000

“LUUKKEE!”

“Axel!” The blond haired, golden retriever, fantasy hero wannabee he was never happier to see, responded with a slightly strangled call that soon turned to actual joy as Axel got closer. “You moron! I told you not to come out here, but at least you survived.”

“Yeah, about that.” Axel got closer and slid to a stop, sending the other two a wave. “Hey Sam, Chef Nathan.”

“You look like shit, whose the cutie?”

“Chef.”

The responses were mixed.

“Named him Lucifer, we’re buds now. Not important.” Lucifer didn’t seem to agree with that by the pawing he got, but they were running out of time. “Luke, you’re an experienced Gourmet Hunter, right?”

“Of course!” Luke puffed out his chest. “You need some help getting out here, don’t you? I was the same way when I started out. Lucky for you, we were on our way out anyway so you’re welcome to-.”

“Yeah, thanks, bit busy right now. Just need some advice.” Axel cut him off before he could go on one of his speech patterns.

Luke blinked but nodded unsurely. “Uh…sure. Whats up?”

“How do I kill an Emerald Great Leg?”

“…”

“…”

“…”

The silence from the trio was telling.

“…Why?” Luke’s choked voice came out as Axel and Lucifer pointed as one to the tree line he had come out from where an ear shattering roar resounded much closer than earlier. “Oh.” The great beasts giant shark head burst through the foliage and looked directly into Luke’s eyes. “OH!” He mind rebooted as he grabbed his shit. “RETREAT! RETREAT AT MAXIMUM SPEED!”

The four of them took off running without a moment of hesitation before Luke turned to the madman that brought a monster after him. “Axel, what the fuck did you do?!”

“I didn’t do anything! You said this place was consistent!”

“Emerald Great Leg’s live in the Central Area! Why is it all the way over here?!”

“Reo.”

“Silence, Luc, he doesn’t he need to know about the frying pan.”

“You understood the cat?” Luke blinked. “Wait, where did you get a frying pan? What did you do with a frying pan!?”

“Nothing.”

“ROAR!” The beast didn’t seem to agree.

“What did you with a frying pan, Axel?!”

“Ro.”

“It was not a hit, Luc, it was barely a love tap.”

“A LOVE TAP?!”

Axel winced at the crack in Luke’s voice.

“Uh, guys, not the time for a spat.” Sam’s slightly panicked voice came out as she tapped Nathan on the arm. The big guy said nothing as he grabbed the smaller woman and threw her over his shoulder. “We need a plan, and we need one now.” She lined up her sniper using Nathan as a support and took aim before pausing. “…Why is that things legs bleeding in hundreds of places?”

“I tried to lose it near a Daikon Beetle tree a while back.”

“…”

“…”

“…Axel, we’re in the Inner Area. There’s gotta be thousands in each nest.”

“I know. Fucking spiteful little shits. Their horns are really refreshing though, want some?”

“Pft.” Sam burst out laughing and opened fire on the existing wounds along the sharks legs. “What a madlad. How the hell are you alive?”

“I’m hard to kill.”

“Ro.”

“Correction, we are hard to kill.”

A change in wind direction had Luke gagging at the scent coming off Axel’s body. “Dude, why do you smell like you drowned in liquor?”

“Oh, I found the Sakeyashi fruits! God, I love this world.”

“Have you been drinking?”

Axel pinched two fingers close together. “Only a lil bit.”

“Reo.”

“Shush you.”

“AXEL!” Luke was about to burst from the amount of red flags Axel raised to Gourmet Hunter standards, but the beast lunged forward just then. “DODGE!”

The four dove out of the way but Axel followed his gut and went in a different direction. Flames ignited on his frying before he swung full force into the sharks nose, right at the same spot as last time.

“ROAR.” A pained whine came from the giant beast as it momentarily turned away again.

“Did you just hit in the nose with a frying pan?!” Luke’s hysterical shout was met by Sam’s booming laughter as the four kept running.

“I told you; it was a love tap.”

“LOVE TAP MY ASS!”

“Hn. Anyway, back to the giant monster chasing us. Got any helpful tips? It’s kinda locked onto my scent and I don’t want to drag you guys down.”

“It’s a little late for that!”

“You’re the ones who are running alongside me. Just go left and it will probably leave you alone.”

Luke’s face hardened at that. “Are you asking us to abandon you?”

“This isn’t your fight.”

“You don’t abandon a friend in need, Axel.”

“…whoever raised you deserves a hug.”

“Sister Martha loves hugs.”

Axel’s face slap was mirrored by Sam’s who spoke up a second later. “Despite the idiots shining morality, he’s got a point. It would leave a bad taste in my mouth to abandon a decent human being here. Besides, if we actually kill that thing it will mean a massive payday.”

“I feel like those words would be more meaningful if you weren’t giving off an orgasmic smile with each shot you take.”

“Hey! I’ve been fighting fucking underwater this whole time. I finally have something I can shoot!”

“And you people think I’m weird.”

““You are!””

“Ro.”

“Lucifer’s right, not the time guys.”

“That’s not what he said, is it?”

“Focus on the giant monster, Luke.”

“Right.” The guy’s brow furrowed in thought. “I have nothing.”

Axel almost tripped. “You say that now?!”

“Wait! I got something.” Luke pointed at Axel’s frying pan. “Why did that tiny thing make it spasm in pain?”

“The Dao of the Frying Pan?”

“…The what?”

“I’ll introduce you later, it’s enlightening.”

Nathan nodded firmly. “Spatula.”

“Never tried that Dao, maybe later.”

“Mn.”

“Guys! Its gaining again!”

“DODGE. AXEL HIT IT!”

A similar pattern repeated before they were on the run again.

“Why is that working?” Luke looked like he couldn’t understand the world.

Axel shrugged. “Hell if I know. I swing and it works, does it really matter?”

“Yes! I need to figure out a strategy…wait…is your pan emitting heat right now?”

“….maybe…”

“….” Luke stared hard before shaking his head. “Whatever, not important right now. Sam, toss me a flare.”

The sharpshooter grabbed one from Nathan’s pack and tossed it over. Luke slammed it across his armor to ignite it before tossing it behind at the charging beast, where it screeched and dodged the thrown item.

“It’s weak to heat!”

“Oh.” Axel and Lucifer matched deadpan gazes. “Would have been useful to know earlier.” He muttered and quickly checked his mana pool before wincing at the numbers. ‘After all those quick escapes, I’m down to under twenty points. Need to recharge.’ Reaching into the tattered remains of a pants pocket, he reached into his Item Box and pulled out a handful of Emerald Candy.

“I got an idea.”

“Does it involve fire?”

“Yes.”

“Then do it!”

“How good are you guys at digging holes?”

“I have twelve sticks of homemade Dynamite in my bag.”

“…”

“…”

“…”

Three pairs of eyes landed on Sam in silent question as she flushed. “What? A girls gotta have a hobby.”

“I find that your hobbies make you highly attractive right now. You get one meal half off at my restaurant.”

“Thanks, darling.” Sam sent Axel a wink and went back to shooting. Her bullets weren’t doing much damage, but each shot to the Great Leg’s existing leg wounds were widening the damage and blood loss.

“Throw?” Nathan’s question was easily understood by his teammates but Sam shook her head.

“That things capture level 8; it will shrug it off. If I brought my C4 batch, I might have been able to toss it inside its mouth, but it moves to fast for that.”

“Never change, Sam.” Luke shook his head with a humored sigh and looked to Axel. “What do you need?”

A plan was quickly worked out that left Luke feeling unsatisfied. “But how will…”

“Just trust me, man.”

Luke met Axel’s gaze and nodded. “Alright, fine. But if you die, I’ll come beat you up.”

“That’s not how that works.”

“I’ll make it work.”

Axel chuckled and held out a fist that was quickly bumped by the hero wannabee before he broke off to the right and turned to the enraged beast.

Taking a deep breath, he pinched his throat and yelled. “Your mother was a hamster! And your father smelt of elder berries!”

Whether the enraged beast understood him or not didn’t matter for it was chasing his scent in the first place and followed.

The watching trio slowed to a stop and watched them go with mixed expressions.

“Did anyone else find that strangely insulting?”

“Yup.”

“Mn.”

Luke pinched his nose. “Let’s just do what he asked.”

“Think it’s actually gonna work?” Sam was skeptical at best, but since she was getting to blow stuff up, she was game either way.

“No idea, but something tells me that guy isn’t gonna die so soon.” Luke had seen hundreds of Gourmet Hunters over the years and helped dozens of newbies with advice, accepted or not, and over that time he developed a gut feeling for the ones who would make it in their line of work.

Axel played hopscotch with that feeling with every word out of his mouth.

Turning away, he signaled his group to get to the planned area. “Sam, just in case, send out a flare shot when we get an hour away from base camp.”

“You want those IGO goons to come out? They charge ridiculous fee’s for rescue missions.” 

“Not during a state of emergency.”

“You consider this an environmental emergency?”

“I do.” Luke had a hard look in his eyes. “An Emerald Great Leg is a Central Area beast. No matter how annoying Axel is, one shouldn’t have come this far out. If we felt those tremors a while ago, the base camp surely did.”

0000

“Captain! Vice-Chief! An emergency flare pierced the tree cover.”

Johannes turned from where he was hovering over a table displaying an updating electronic map with the senior staff to address the soldier. “How far?”

“And what color?” The captain pitched in and got a look from Johannes before blowing out some smoke and explaining. “I set up a color code system around these parts cuz of the lack of electronic intel. Green is transfer support for something valuable that can’t wait, yellow means they need medical and or hunter support, and red means something big followed them home and it’s above their pay grade.”

“Hm. Well done.” Johannes nodded and the two turned to the soldier.

“It was red sir. About one hour directly north.”

“Do we have any teams ready for deployment?”

“We just replaced three squads on the borderline from a fleeing migration of Friday Monkeys.”

“Damn cowardly beasts.”

“They’re harmless if you just let them passed.”

“We’re not supposed to let anything past!”

“Enough.” Johannes voice cut into the chatter and silenced the room as he fixed his sunglasses. “I’ll go. I’ll take the two agents I brought with me.” Protest immediately rose in the room but he waved them off. “It needs to be investigated before it becomes a bigger problem. Captain, I’m leaving you in charge.”

The grizzled veteran nodded with a smirk around his cigar. “I’d join you but I got a bad knee.” He knocked his leg on the desk with a metallic ding from his prosthetic. “Hasn’t been the same. Take some of my officers, they know the forest well.” He signaled a few soldiers to the side who stood up without protest and saluted before following Johannes to the door. “God speed, Johannes.”

The Vice-Chief only waved over his shoulder. He might not be one of the Gourmet Cell powerhouses of the IGO, but one didn’t reach his position without being skilled.

0000

Yet while some were having dramatic set offs like heroes and launching into the lagoon like figures out of an action movie, others were having much more mundane scenes.

“Are the charges set?” Luke paced worriedly in the clearing they chose.

“Yes, oh fearless leader, you’ve asked half a dozen times now. Stuff you face or keep it silent, would you?” Sam’s retort came from her perch, where had tied herself to a tall branch and had a clear shot of the triggering dynamite stick.

Due to the magnetic interruptions and extreme humidity, there was no good way to reliably get a stable fire going or set an explosive off in the Emerald Lagoon, and a lit fuse was too inconsistent with proper timing. Thankfully, Sam was an expert sharpshooter.

“We only got one shot at this.”

“We know. Nathan, sit on him or something.”

“Mn.”

“Nate, she was just joking. Nathan!”

Sam smirked as Luke got manhandled before turning her gaze back out. “It’s about time. I’m sending out the flare for Axel, you guys ready?”

“Hit it.”

Nathan sent a thumbs up and Sam fire off her last flare shot, her second to last having been used a half hour before after she climbed as high as she could to pierce the tree tops and alert base camp. ‘It’s all or nothing now. For Axel anyway, we can still run. I’d prefer a payday though.’

0000

And while one party had set off with grim determination, and the second was lying in wait with a trap in anticipation, Axel and Lucifer were having a very different experience.

“Flaming Frying Pan Punch!”

“ROAR!”

“Reo.”

“Too much?”

“Ro.”

“Fair. Coming up with attack names is hard.”

The duo, or in reality, Axel, had been running from the giant monster for almost an hour after splitting with the trio of hunters. Thanks to the dozens of shots Sam took on the beasts already injured legs, the likely accumulative blood loss, and the long chase, it was slowing down enough for him to be able to dodge and counter with minimal risk.

“Wo!” He stumbled on a root and almost lost a leg on a dodge, with only Lucifer’s water wall helping to push the beasts mouth aside for half a second to allow him to get out of the way. “Thanks, bud.”

“Ro.”

Sadly, minimal risk was still a tight rope. All the damage just turned a sure fire death sentence into a prolonged death chase. And even if his life was on the line, Axel still couldn’t keep his mind from wandering to the passage in the beast encyclopedia about the Great leg’s meat.

“Hey, Luc.”

“Reo?”

“Whats more important, life or booze and food?”

Lucifer put a paw to his chin in deep contemplation before chirping. “Ro.”

“Right? I think we need to change the plan.”

“Reow.”

“It’s ok, Luke won’t mind.”

“Ro.”

“No, I’m not gonna get lectured for a last minute change.” At Lucifer’s raised brow, Axel could only avert his gaze. “I’ll just run before he can start.”

“Reo.” An understanding nod was the answer as Axel rubbed his furry ears.

“Good, now let me think of a plan that involves us eating that big ugly fish.”

The original plan involved having the beast stuck in one place while he used his Item Box to dump a shit ton of Sakeyashi fruit on the shark and light it up like a torch. But that plan would not only waste his precious liquor, but completely ruin the high-quality sashimi. Not only did his soul burn with a passion to eat it, but the book said it weighed around a ton, and its meat went for over 2K yen every 100 grams.

His mind rapidly did the mental math accompanied by a dancing chibi Lucifer. ‘That’s over 19 mil Yen, or around 130K USD. I could pay my student loans four times over with that….’ Did he really need to pay them off when he could run to another world? No. But debts weighed on the heart and were better paid off. ‘I’ll pay in pennies.’

Looking behind him, the giant deadly monster that struck fear into his heart on first glance no longer seemed so threatening. No, now it looked like a plate full of sushi and money. Greed and Gluttony combined to help him come to the answer of what he needed to do.

“Luc, I have a great idea.”

“Ro?”

“Yes, it involves a frying pan.”

“Ro.”

“No, it’s gonna work this time.”

“Ro?”

“I’ll hit harder.”

“…”

Lucifer tried to leap off but got clamped down by Axel’s arms.

“No running.”

“Ro!”

“I won’t get us killed, trust me.”

Man and cat matched eyes before the feline huffed and the man laughed. Axel placed his partner on his head and picked up the pace just as he saw Sam’s flare in the distance.

“Hang on tight, bud. No falling off this time.”

“Reo.” Lucifer’s claws gleamed as they sunk into Axel’s skull with a resounding crunch.

“SON OF A...”

0000

“Here he comes.”

‘No shit.’ Luke grumbled to himself. It didn’t take a genius to see the giant beast tearing a path through the foliage. ‘I still don’t like this plan.’

The plan, if it could be called one, was for Axel to distract the beast long enough for the trio to find a wide enough area for Sam to set her charges. The explosion wouldn’t harm a capture level 8 like an Emerald Great Leg, but burying it under tons of dirt, stone, and branches would keep it contained for a short time. ‘But that’s only if we can catch it in the center. If it’s too far to the sides, it will escape before we can do anything to it.’

Axel had told them to leave getting it into position to him, but that didn’t exactly make Luke feel at ease. ‘And how are we supposed to damage it even when its trapped? Go through the ass?’

The how didn’t really seem to matter anymore as Axel burst into the clearing, wearing even less of his rags than before if that were possible with the strange blue cat clinging to his head.

“Axel! Run!”

“What do you think I’m doing?!”

‘Rude.’ Luke thought but couldn’t argue based on the frantic running speed his new friend was moving at. ‘He should enter a competition for that.’ The odd thought entered his brain even as he watched Axel reach the center of the clearing, only for his heart to jump into his throat as he saw him slowing down.

“Get out of there, Axel!”

Luke’s anxiety only climbed higher as he saw his friend ignore him and spin around, digging trenches into the dirt as he slowed. “SAM! FIRE!”

‘No!’ Luke screamed in his mind before his mouth could catch up as he caught Sam lining up her shot. “DON’T-!” His shout wasn’t completed before the trigger was pulled.

Nathan tackled him to the earth as a physical wave of sound reached him before his world erupted in fire, his last sight being Axel not running away, but jumping straight at the charging beast. ‘NO!’

The tremors that reached him were stronger than any he had felt. His eyes couldn’t see through the dust cloud, his ears rung in a high pitched whine, and his chest felt it was being compressed by a fallen mangrove.

‘Wait.’ He reached out and confirmed the last thing was his giant of a teammate. His lips formed the words for ‘Get off’ but he couldn’t hear himself say it. The stoic chef seemed to understand Luke’s actions anyway as he rolled off and helped Luke up.

Both coming to stand at a ledge as a strong wind blew in, revealing a fourteen meter long crater with the beast half buried beneath a mountain of rubble, its neck pressed down and its nose clearly broken and pushed inward in a gory mess. ‘What the fuck, Sam?’

The aforementioned third member of their group soon joined the duo, coming to stand by the ledge with eyes practically shining with excitement. “Sam, what the fuck?”

The ringing subsided enough for him to hear his own voice as the woman turned to him. “WHAT?” She stuck a finger in her ear trying to gain her own hearing back.

He pointed at the crater and back to her. “Why did you shoot?!”

“HE TOLD ME TO.”

“Why did you listen to him?!”

“IT WAS The best chance we had.” Her voice came down in volume as her hearing returned. “You knew it had to be in the center of the clearing for maximum effect. Look, the sheer humidity here already put out any lingering flames.”

“That didn’t mean he was supposed to die for it!”

“He made his call and I respected that.” Her sunglasses had been lost in the explosion as he could see her eyes narrow at him. “Or are you saying you would have done differently in his shoes.”

“I would have!” Luke shouted but even still he felt the words were hollow. “I would…..” He gripped his head in sorrow. “This is why we make plans! So we don’t die like so many others!”

“There wasn’t any time for a plan, Luke.” Sam commented. “It was chasing him, he did most of the work, and he survived long enough for all of this to be possible. If he wanted to go out on his own terms, that’s his choice as a Gourmet Hunter. Don’t insult that with survivors guilt.” Sam knew she was being harsh, but she had to be or Luke would start blaming himself.

Luke held a hand over his face and sighed. “Why did he have to be such an idiot?”

Nathan put a silent hand on his shoulder in support, and Sam, ever the focused one, gazed down at the beast. “That things still alive.”

Somehow that actually got a humored scoff from Luke. “And now we have to clean up his mess.” He walked up beside her and looked down in sadness. “It is a big one.”

“Mn.” Nathan nodded.

“And a big payday.” Sam added.

“And sashimi.” Axel commented.

“Ro.” Lucifer mentioned.

“Right? Axel would have wanted to eat it.” Luke smiled wistfully.

“Mn.” Nathan nodded.

“He would have.” Sam added.

“I will.” Axel commented.

“Ro.” Lucifer drooled.

“And now we have to….” Luke paused and blinked, slowly turning his head to the right.

Nathan followed his gaze to Sam, who followed as well to Axel, who followed to Lucifer, who slapped Axel for almost knocking him off his shoulder.

“Axel?”

“Hm?” The guy turned back with a casual wave. “Yo, what’d I miss?”

He just stood there, with wild black hair like a lions mane, naked aside from a pair of briefs and a single oddly intact sock, covered in first degree burns, dirt, and soot with his soot covered blue cat clinging to his shoulder like it was the most natural thing in the world.

Luke felt a blood vessel burst. “HOW ARE YOU ALIVE?!”

“Spite.” Axel smacked the side of his head, shaking soot out of his ears with a casualness that only worked to piss Luke off more.

“You were at the center of that explosion! How didn’t that kill you?!” He marched over and grabbed the moron by his shoulder, shaking him like a ragdoll. “Do you have any idea what I just went through!? How could you be…” He went off on a tirade like a storm with a determination to burn a god for stealing the last sweet roll.

Meanwhile, Sam was patting Nathan on the back to get the guy to breath from how white he looked. “He’s alive Nathan! He’s not a ghost! Look! He has flesh!”

That was when Axel learned Nathan seemed to be deathly afraid of ghosts.

How long the chaotic scene continued for went unsaid, but it was ended by a low rumble from a twitching beast that wasn’t quiet dead yet.

Axel’s expression firmed as he clamped a hand over Luke’s face and pushed him away. “Hold that thought, forever, I have a hunt to finish.” He looked down from the ledge with cold eyes.

“And how are you planning to do that?” Luke walked up beside him.

“With this.” He held up two frying pans, one barely functional. 

“Ro.” Lucifer held up his claws.

“And that.” Axel offhandedly translated.

Nathan stepped beside him with a raised giant spatula, giving Axel a hard look that was matched. Sam and Luke held their breath for reasons they couldn’t explain before Nathan grunted in acknowledgement.

“Mn.”

“Hn.”

Nothing else was said as the two jumped over the ledge, running right for the beasts head and diving straight at its frozen eye.

“I TOLD YOU I WOULD EAT YOU, FUCKER!”

“REOW!”

“CHEF!”

The trio started hacking their way through the eye with what Luke noticed were obvious heat waves radiating off Axel’s infuriated form.

“…”

“…”

“Sam?”

“Don’t look at me. I’m ignoring reality for now.” She instead focused on the crater. “I wonder….If I increased the nitroglycerine dosage and lowered the….” She trailed off into her own world, with Luke taking a step away from the obviously stressed woman worryingly mentioning highly volatile ingredient combination ratios.

“I…” He looked down and saw them dig deeper in before looking up. “I need a vacation.”

"Is that so?" Luke turned and blinked at the sight of an IGO agent approaching with a trio of veteran soldiers behind him. The leading man walked up to his side at the ledge and peered down at the carnage, his thoughts hidden behind gleaming sunglasses and a poker face that unsettled him. "Perhaps I could help with that."

Chapter End.