Chapter 485 – A Conversation (Patreon)

This is probably the most meta chapter I've done in a while. Practically an art-piece sort of thing, honestly, but I think it worked! We're gonna boogie up some high-concept shit and then swap back around the the slice of life and recovery!

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Come on now. Are we really going to delay a second more? Read on. It’ll be interesting.

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Raika knew, of course, that there’s only so much that one can do to avoid detection when within another’s domain. For all that her unique nature affords her a considerable amount of distortion to regular Qi senses, stealth has never been her true strong suit, more a tool in her arsenal. 

She knew that I would find her the moment she reconnected with herself. 

She guessed correctly that I would let her.

I give her her privacy as she addresses her son, as she begins her day, as she walks her other kiddos through the steps of beginning their day and recovering from their festivities. It’s really not that much to do, relative to her capacity, but I know how such things go. When you’re as young as she is, kids are important.

Once she’s done, and she’s shoo’d the gentleman caller (who was very much not a gentleman last night) from her home, only then do I give her a little poke to remind her that I’m here. 

She sees the way that the clouds shift, and turns to face me. 

It’s rare for you to address me, I tell her. 

“Yeah, well, as much staring as you’ve been doing, it tends to get my fucking attention.”

I’m just looking forward to this is all. I’m a patient bastard, but oh, what a wait it has been. 

“Keep waiting, asshole.”

Aww. But I’m so very excited for all the fun. You’ve built up such a delightful little play for me. For us! It’ll be fantastic. And you never did tell me how you liked my gifts. Might as well tell me now.

“There’s no gift you’ve given me that I won’t be returning, unfortunately. Many of them with significant interest.”

She cracks her neck to one side, then the other, using the little movements as a cue to get more of herself included in the conversation. By the time she’s done shifting her weight, all of her many many pieces have turned to focus on me, bright and loud and with varying degrees of eagerness for what’s to come. 

“It’s surprising to me how goddamn bored you seem. You’d think, what with all of the many, many horrors you’re busy committing, you’d be entertained enough.”

Oh you lovely little meal. A silly thought. It implies that I enjoy what I have to do, and I very much do not. 

“That doesn’t make me hate you any less.”

Oh, Raika. You know that your opinion of me has no bearing on what I’ll do to you. Or to your little friends. Or to their little friends. Or to all of their little friends, and family, and their friends, and their family, and on and on and on until I’m done. But if that hate makes you fight me a little harder, well then, that will be entertaining. 

She frowns, taking out a pipe to smoke some of that home grown mess she calls a blend. 

“I hope you’ll appreciate that entertainment. May it keep you warm as we kill you.”

Oh we’ve been over this, beastie. You can’t. And you won’t.

“We’ll see about that.”

I surely will.

“Is that all you have? Bluster?”

Hey, you’re the one in my house. And haven’t I been a gracious host? Haven’t I let you play in that lovely little town? You know, I did say that you could have all this. You don’t have to go through all this mess just to get what you would’ve gotten anyways if you just agreed to work with me. You could have a thousand of these little villages. A few cities. A hundred cities. A Wall of your own. Some nice woodlands for those nasty little beasties of yours to run around with. All for the low low price of a little cooperation.

“That’s not nearly so enticing considering I’ve seen the sorts of things that happen to those who cooperate with you. How are the Hearts feeling about all this? How’re the Fengs?”

Eh, they’re fine. Hanging in there, you know how it goes.

“I do know. I know what it’s like to be fed upon. I know what you consider gifts. I’m not interested.”

Aww, but you’re so much stronger now! Even more valuable. What’s a little trade-off for everything you’ve ever wanted in exchange for a little bit of help now and then?

“The sort of help the Fengs give you? The sort of help that the Garden provides?

Now that’s hardly fair. The Fengs practically volunteer for that sort of thing. I barely even have to ask them anymore. 

“And the Garden?”

Well. We all have to do things we don’t like to do sometimes. Comes with the territory. 

She lets out a little puff of smoke, the dark blue of the smoke filling her cabin with the scent of earthy herbs and sweet fruit. It’s a personal blend she’s been developing over the last few years, one she’s almost perfected to her taste, and the sensation of it shivers through millions of nerves across tens of thousands of miles.  

Some of those nerves tingle across bright, glowing things that demand attention from me, which she’s managed to hide surprisingly well. Others tingle across biomes that span whole landscapes, her biology filling thousands of bellies and glowing through millions of veins as she spreads through and into so many bodies. Some she’s crafted, some that she’s found, some that have found her, all of whom are getting ever so gradually more dangerous. 

To the Empire, sure. To her also, if she isn’t careful.

But that’s how you like these sorts of things, isn’t it? 

“It’s fucking annoying when you talk like that. Can’t you just make some goddamn letters show up in the dust or something?”

But what’s the fun in that? So bland. And hardly impressive for you. I’m giving you such an opportunity here! Isn’t it so much more engaging to do it like this? 

“Engaging doesn’t mean enjoyable. Having to figure out what different bits of moisture coming and going in the air mean is no one’s idea of a good time, asshole.”

I’ll have you know it is several tens of thousands of people’s ideas of a good time, actually. Maybe a few million? I haven’t checked recently and– ah, yes, past the threshold of a million. A million and two, actually. Lots of weather enthusiasts in the Empire. It’s an admirable field of study. 

“Fuck off.”

If you say so.

“Oh come on, asshole. Not going to bother talking me through how much I like to gamble? Giving me some more criticism about how I’m going to beat your ass?”

Oh, why bother? I mean, it’s hardly like you’re going to stop doing it. And it’s served you so well! Gosh, you’ve taken gambles I would never have dreamed of, but you just keep beating the odds, don’t you? Keep clawing your way back, by luck and power and even a little bit of loooove. So go ahead! Keep gambling! Those Beasts you’re feeding surely won’t come back to bit that hand of yours. Not like you didn’t come back to bite mine, hmm?

She shrugs. “If they do, that’s fine. I’ll survive.”

And it’ll be a part of the plan even then, won’t it?

“Aaaah, you know me so well by now. Yeah, I learned that lesson.”

Plans within plans. 

“And now’s when you tell me that all of this is according to your plan within a plan within a plan, right?”

Oh, you flatterer. How could I ever have such a perfect and convoluted series of schemes within schemes ready to go, constantly shifting and updating over time and in reaction to the world’s changes? Goodness, that surely does sound like an awfully complicated series of events, doesn’t it?

“Gods you’re fucking annoying.”

Yeah, I annoy them too. They watch through me, you know. They hear me just as I hear you. They’re watching right now.

…

She lets out another breath of smoke. 

“Yeah, they fucking stare at the world through peep-holes in the sky literally every night. That’s not as intimidating as you think it is.”

Or maybe you’re just underestimating it because you’re so used to them. Perhaps I’ve biased you, hmm? 

“Oh, you surely have had an impact on my life. All the ways I’ve suffered. All the people you’ve taken from me. The poisoned fucking foundation of this world you’ve built. You’ve shaped me from my first fucking moment, from my birth. From the family that birthed me and the poverty of us. The suffering of winters, when you can shape the fucking skies. The horrors of war, of death, of violence, when you have the power to reshape everything that is. You think I haven’t felt it? The way things stutter sometimes? You’ve made a mess of this place. A horror of this world. Yeah. You’ve biased me.

“And now all of that sin comes home to roost.”

I would laugh if I could. 

Yes. Yes, I suppose it does. Though it’ll look quite the way you’re planning. 

Speaking of which! Is this enough time? Have I stuck around long enough for you? Is that long enough for your little friend to have gotten away? I’m happy to wait a little longer, but surely you must be getting bored of this by now. I much prefer an audience role to a front-stage performer when it comes to you. Frankly, I have too much going on to be spending all my time chatting here. Better to let you do your thing, and I’ll do mine, and we’ll meet up again.

“Oh, he’s long gone by now. I just like pissing you off.”

Well you’re doing a terrible job of it. I don’t know if I’ve told you this, but in my humble opinion, you’re the most entertaining thing that’s happened to me in… gosh. Six hundred years at least. And that’s saying something, because it is an exciting time right now. I mean, that little campfire on the Wall alone would make for some good viewing, but your furry friend? Gosh. You wouldn’t believe the shit he’s getting up to. Makes even me shiver.

“Yeah. He seems like the type.”

He really does, doesn’t he? Makes you think. All those big scary wolves and tigers and demons in the world, and it’s that one little cow that’s got me impressed with just how scary you can be. If you weren’t around? Oh, he’d be on the top of my list. Gone down to about the fifth spot now. You’ve had quite an impact.

“And here I thought you preferred to be audience rather than commentator. Is this the plan? Are you just going to keep flattering me until I get so annoyed I slit my own throat?”

Oh my! Such claws on you. Very well! I’ll leave you to it. If you ever want to chat again, all you need to do is call me, little beastie. Maybe next time you’ll even decide to listen to sense and settle down in a few little towns of your own, properly this time.

“I know you better than that, bastard. You’d hate that, wouldn’t you?”

Well, it would certainly be less entertaining. 

She lets out a grunt and another huff of smoke. It dissipates, undisturbed by any weird currents in the air, and that sense of presence, of awareness, dissipates from her surroundings. It’s always hard to tell in any detail, but it’s like back with the “invisible servants” in the Imperial Palaces she’s been in. Enough sensory information, analyzed by enough perspectives, can show even the slightest discrepancies. And calling that thing’s attention directly was a pretty sure gamble.

Whatever it is that sits atop the throne in the sky above the world, looking down on its Empire, it’s not human. Not a person in the way she is, or in a way that she understands, but it is a person. It has actions, intentions, desires, and as far as she can tell, it is at least partially conscious of everything that happens within the Wall. 

The entirety of its Empire is its domain. Whether that’s a domain with a capital or lowercase D, she’s not sure yet, but it’s better to stay on the side of caution. 

It sees all. A state of total and perfect surveillance that covers everything it thinks as its own. 

But most importantly, it’s a person. Some sort of one, at least, enough of one that it has opinions. Biases. Desires. 

It can be manipulated. It can be tricked. 

And at the end of the day, just because you can see it coming doesn’t mean that you can stop it. 

It does make keeping anything secret a goddamn nightmare, though. When something is always watching, one has to be very careful what they say.

Luckily, it seems that it isn’t everywhere at once. Whatever level of perception the Emperor has, its not omniscient, and it isn’t omnipresent. It has to pick and choose what it’s watching. Otherwise, why have a watch-list at all? It could just see everything at once. If it isn’t, then it has to pick and choose. 

It’s a whole new battlefield, but that doesn’t make the war any less winnable. 

“If you can still hear me,” she says, “go and absolutely fuck yourself. And when you’re done doing that, as terribly and grossly as you can, fuck off forever.”

It won’t work, obviously. If words were enough to convince the great powers of the world to stop their atrocities, then the wailing and praying of the victims would be enough on its own. There would be no need for violence. 

And yet. 

So there will be war. Again, once and for all, for all the marbles, there will be war.

No. No that’s not right, is it? That’s not all that this is. 

There will be revolution. 

No. 

No. 

There will be the breaking of the wheel, and built of its spokes, something new. 

She will allow nothing less.