Land of Wolves: Chapter 41-45 (Patreon)

Chapter 41

My lips shift into a grimace as I take a sip of my coffee and realize it’s gone cold. I thought I had just made it, but a glance at the clock tells me it’s been twenty minutes since I curled up on my couch and began reading.

Yesterday I finished and returned the book Mary let me check out, and nothing has ever felt better than picking out an armful of new ones and taking them home. I could tell Mary was trying not to laugh as she noticed my sudden change in genre, but she was strangely polite and didn’t say anything about it.

I take another sip of my coffee, debating getting up to warm it before deciding it’s fine cold. Getting up means putting down my book, and I’m not quite ready to do that because that means I have to live in my thoughts.

I can’t think of anything worse.

All my thoughts revolve around Caleb, and I’m still trying to figure out what my future with him looks like. He still calls twice a day, but I’m still ignoring them.

I know I probably shouldn’t, and I don’t have a place to be angry considering I’m the one who tried to slit his throat while he was sleeping, but I can’t help but feel irritated every time I talk with him. HPAW has been a threat the entire time we’ve been together, and I don’t understand why he’s suddenly being so cautious about them.

It makes no sense.

My fingers curl around the pages of my book, and I grab my phone and check the date with a sigh. Sash will be returning in a week. I haven’t seen much of Cole lately, and I hope I don’t encounter Sash when she returns, either.

I’m sure she blames me for her title being stripped, and I can only imagine how her anger has grown this past month.

I run a hand through my hair and return my attention to my book.

The love story isn’t capturing my attention as much as I hoped it would, but I’m already halfway finished and I feel like I should see it through to the end. My lips purse as I flip to the next page and continue reading.

Eventually, my eyes grow droopy, and I stick a bookmark between the pages before rolling onto my side and letting my eyes slip shut. Sleep hovers at the border of my mind, threatening to pull me under, before abruptly vanishing as somebody bangs on my door.

I jerk upright with a gasp, my mind disorientated as I scramble to my feet and make my way to the door. The banging hasn’t stopped, and I can guess who it is by the sheer disrespect.

“What?” I hiss, yanking the door open and locking eyes with Adam.

My infuriating neighbor frowns and steps back, his eyes sliding judgingly down my front. I haven’t bothered to get dressed yet today, and I flush as I place a hand in front of Caleb’s shirt. I forgot I was wearing it, and I curse as I watch the corner of Adam’s lip twitch.

He’s laughing at me.

I don’t see why considering he’s still wearing his pajamas. His sweatpants hang loosely off his hips, and his shirt looks at least twenty years old. The color is faded to a dingy gray, and I’m pretty sure I spot a hole near his armpit.

“Well?” I prompt, tapping my foot against the floor.

Adam works his jaw side to side before sucking in an annoyed breath and shoving a piece of paper into my chest. I scramble to grab it, my irritation rising. What’s his problem?

“What’s the fuck?”

“Everybody’s talking about how you didn’t know what a library card was,” he says.

Okay? What am I supposed to do with that information?

I wonder if they’ve also been discussing the HPAW information I told Mary. I’d ask Adam if I didn’t fear he’d make some snide remark.

I shift my weight from foot to foot and direct my attention to the paper Adam handed me. It’s all folded up, and as I open it, I realize it’s handwritten. My pulse jumps, a bit scared of what he’s giving me, but I force myself not to show any fear as I read over the first few lines.

The coffee shop you go to has a reward program. Ask them for a card the next time you go in. Every 10th coffee you buy is free.

Okay? I suppose that’s helpful to know.

I sink my teeth into my bottom lip as I read the next item.

Stores will offer discounts if you sign up for their card program. Say no.

“Why would I say no to a discount?” I ask.

Adam huffs.

“It’s a scam. Just say no.”

That’s not the most helpful response, but I don’t fight him as my eyes travel to the next item on the list.

Don’t ever give out your personal ID number.

I’m already aware of that one. Miss Greene hammered the do’s and don’ts of my personal information when I came in to get my ID. It’s safe enough to give people the information listed on my card, but I should avoid sharing the private government number I was given.

I took it to heart, and I practically gave the man at the bank a heart attack when I refused to give it to him. It took almost ten minutes of convincing, and I now know I need to share it if I want to open accounts.

My eyes quickly scan down the remainder of the sheet. Adam wrote down a good twenty things, and I clear my throat before folding back up the note and shoving it into my pocket.

I don’t like Adam, but I have to admit this information is helpful.

“Why’d you do this?” I ask, meeting Adam’s eye.

He scratches the side of his jaw and takes a small step away from my door.

“You made me cookies, and I don’t want to owe you,” he says.

Adam rocks back on his heels before sighing and throwing his arms to the sides. He looks uncomfortable.

“Word is spreading about your upbringing, and there’s lots of speculation and jokes about the things you do and don’t know. I thought…” Adam trails off with a grimace. “I’m not your biggest fan, but I don’t think you deserve all the hate you’re getting. I wrote down all the practical things I could think of that might be helpful for you to know.”

I gulp, rendered silent. Is Adam being friendly?

That explains why he looks so terribly uncomfortable. I’m sure not being a jerk is new for him.

My fingers curl around the paper in my picket, and I glance at the stairwell behind Adam before sighing and stepping to the side. I assume he doesn’t have anywhere to be considering he’s still wearing his pajamas, and I have to admit some company would be nice.

Greg’s the only person I ever chat with, but he’s busy and we usually only get a few sentences in before he’s pulled away by one of the nurses.

“Do you want a drink?” I ask.

Adam pulls out his phone and glances at the time.

“It’s eleven AM.”

I don’t react, and Adam sucks on his teeth before shrugging and stepping inside my apartment. He doesn’t bother hiding his interest as he looks around my home, his eyes darting all over my furniture as he makes his way to my kitchen.

For a moment, I’m shocked by how confident he is navigating my space, but then I realize his place is probably the same layout.

I follow him into the kitchen and grab a bottle of champagne. My hand hesitates over the handle of tequila that was here when I moved in, but that’s a recipe for disaster. I haven’t had hard liquor in weeks, and drinking some now will undoubtedly lead to me crying pathetically on the floor.

“It smells musty in here,” Adam says, drawing my attention.

I hum, unsure how to respond to that as he approaches one of my windows and pushes it open. I haven’t noticed a scent, but I’m willing to admit I haven’t necessarily been airing this place out.

It’s cold outside, and I’ve been avoiding opening my windows so the breeze doesn’t find its way into my space.

A small part of me wants to tell Adam to close my windows and ignore the mustiness, but I fight the urge. I suppose I should be glad he’s honest about the smell. Most people would ignore it.

I turn toward my fridge and grab a bottle of orange juice. Does Caleb think my place is musty?

“You making mimosas?” Adam asks, stepping into my living room.

He’s nosy, and I watch him out of the corner of my eyes as he walks through the room investigating. He leans in to better peer at my things, and I flinch when he grabs my discarded book and flips it to read the back.

His eyebrows raise, and I watch him fight a smile as he sets it back down.

“I see why you were so excited to discover you could bring the library books home,” he snorts. “I’m sure Alpha Caleb wouldn’t be pleased to learn you’re reading porn in public.”

My cheeks turn red, and I spin around and grab some cups to hide them.

“I’m sure he’ll be even less pleased to learn there’s a male in my home making comments about my porn,” I say.

The words are out of my mouth before I think better of them, and I wince as I grab the champagne bottle and get to work opening it. My response sounded more like a threat than I wanted it to, but Adam doesn’t seem upset as he sets the book down and returns to the kitchen.

He watches me struggle with the champagne for about three seconds before snatching it out of my hand and popping it open. The loud noise makes me flinch, and I busy myself with the orange juice while he pours the champagne.

“Do you work?” I ask.

Adam glances at me, his eyebrows furrowed.

“Of course, I work.”

He sounds mildly offended, but I think it was fair to ask. He’s always wearing sweatpants, and I never see or hear him leaving his apartment. I convinced myself he was some trust fund kid who’s never had to work a day in his life. It explains his snotty attitude and expensive apartment.

I don’t actually know how much the rent in this place is, but I assume it’s pretty costly. The apartment is enormous, and the appliances are brand new.

Adam and I make awkward eye contact as I nudge his drink in his direction. It’s pretty much all champagne, but I’m not complaining.

“What do you do, then?” I continue to pry.

My air conditioner kicks on, and I turn and glance at the windows before forcing myself to look away. I can deal with being cold for thirty minutes. I don’t want my place to be smelly, and I suppose I can put on a sweatshirt and some socks if I get too cold.

“I’m a teacher,” Adam says. “Third grade.”

I have to set down my drink to process that. Adam? A teacher of young children?

A loud laugh bubbles out of my throat before I can stop myself. There’s absolutely no way. While I don’t think Adam is a horrible person or anything, he most definitely doesn’t give off teacher vibes. I’m sure his poor students hate him.

Adam looks mildly offended as I continue to laugh, and I have to turn around when I can’t get myself to stop.

“I’m sorry,” I gasp, holding up my hand. “I don’t mean to laugh at you!”

It takes a good two minutes for me to settle myself, and when I finally find the strength to turn back around and face Adam, he looks thoroughly displeased.

He holds eye contact with me as he finishes his drink, and I take a tentative sip of mine as he makes himself another.

“Shouldn’t you be in class right now?” I ask, glancing at the clock.

“It’s a holiday. I’ve got the day off,” he says. “Shouldn’t you be at work?”

I shake my head. “I finished everything I needed to do this week.”

Things fall silent between us, and I take another sip of my drink as I try to think of something to say. It’s been so long since I’ve had a conversation with somebody other than Caleb, and I’m unsure what to talk about. It doesn’t help that Adam and I don’t necessarily get along, either.

“Do you have a mate?” I blurt after a tense few minutes.

I regret the question the second it slips from my lips. Mates can be a touchy subject, and Caleb once told me it’s typically impolite to ask a wolf you don’t know about theirs. Thankfully, Adam doesn’t seem off-put as he shakes his head and rests his elbows on the counter.

“Not yet.”

He glances at his hand, and I do the same. His mate mark is a crisp white, and he flexes his fingers with a low sigh. Caleb’s was that light when we first met, and my heart drops as I wonder if it will ever be that light again.

It’s slowly lightening, but his and mine are still impossibly dark.

“Yours was a deep red when you arrived here,” Adam says, drawing my attention.

I hesitate before dipping my chin, acknowledging what he says is correct.

“Why?” he continues.

I sink my teeth into my bottom lip before clearing my throat and turning away. I don’t like thinking about it, let alone talking to another about it.

“I worked for HPAW,” I admit. “And they encouraged me to do things they knew would harm our bond.”

Adam rests his chin on his palm.

“Like what?”

I shrug. “Have sex, primarily.”

My skin feels warm, and I anxiously tug at the hem of Caleb’s shirt as I try and read Adam’s reaction. He barely has one, his facial muscles unmoving and his body entirely still.

I know the wolves are crazy about saving themselves for their mates, and I’m sure he’s judging.

“I’ve been intimate with women before,” Adam says. “Not sex, but I went to a human college and occasionally let girls put their mouths on me.”

I jolt, surprised to hear it. I would’ve never guessed.

I also had no idea that wolves went to human colleges. That would have been information I excitedly saved for HPAW and pried more into, but I let it roll off my shoulders.

Adam clears his throat. “It darkened my mark, but just slightly. After a few years, it returned to normal.”

I nod. Why is he telling me this?

“You must have had a lot of sex to turn your mark so dark,” he continues, his eyes traveling to my hand.

I hide it behind my back, hating when people look at it. I’m embarrassed by it.

“You were captured when you were seven…” Adam trails off and waits for me to nod before continuing. “How old were you when they started ‘encouraging’ you to have sex?”

My hands clench into tight fists, and after a few seconds, I turn away. That’s none of his fucking business.

Adam waits, and I throw my drink back before spinning back around.

“I’m not sure. I was fourteen, maybe,” I say.

Adam looks pissed, and he finishes his drink with a whispered curse. Things fall silent between us, and he finishes his drink before making us another.

We end up finishing the bottle, and he doesn’t bring up HPAW again as we make our way to the couch.

Adam takes it upon himself to turn on my TV and put on some show I haven’t seen before. It’s about as comfortable as it can be considering we’re practically strangers who don’t get along, but I still enjoy it more than being alone.

“You should answer his calls,” Adam says when my phone lights up with a photo of Caleb’s face.

My phone sits on the coffee table between us, and I stare at it for a long minute before leaning forward and answering. Adam takes that as his cue to leave, and I watch him get up and return to his apartment before turning my attention back to my phone.

“Hello?”

Chapter 42

I pull the phone away from my ear before sighing and bringing it back.

“Hello?” I ask again.

I’m met with nothing more than the sound of crackling. It’s loud, and I glance at my screen one more time before realizing that Caleb has butt dialed me. He’s never done that before, at least not that I know of, and my lips curl into a small smile as I shake my head and hang up.

He will be pissed when he sees this later.

I set my phone on the coffee table and stare at it for a few minutes, waiting for Caleb to call me back, but when he doesn’t, I turn off my TV and pick up my book. I suppose I could call him, but I wouldn’t know what to say.

It’s probably for the best that we didn’t speak.

Despite knowing that, my eyes dart toward my phone what feels like every ten seconds. It’s impossible to focus, and I find myself working through imaginary conversations that we’ll likely never have.

Something is seriously wrong with me.

An hour passes before I force myself into the bathroom. I pointedly leave my phone in the living room as I draw myself a bath, and it takes every bit of willpower I have not to run naked across my apartment and grab it.

It’s on silent so I won’t know if Caleb calls, and that knowledge only worsens my anxiety. I undress and sink into the tub. My muscles don’t relax nearly as much as I’d like them to, and I stare at my stubby toes sticking out of the water before reaching for my book.

I’m determined to finish the damn thing, and I urge myself to focus on the words as I soak in the tub.

It doesn’t work, and every few seconds I find myself pausing and listening to see if I can hear any vibrations from my phone.

I know it’s too far away to hear anything, but I find myself doing it anyway.

I’m pathetic.

Caleb is living in my mind rent-free, and I’m horrible at trying to stop it. It’s impossible.

I find myself skimming through the second half of my book. It ends the way I expect it to, with the couple finally having the conversation they should have had within the first thirty pages, and I drop it onto the ground before groaning and stepping out of the tub.

I’ll take one quick look. That’s never hurt anybody.

Wrapping a towel around my torso, I hug it to my chest as I hurry out of my bathroom and into the living room. The tub drains loudly behind me, and I just about eat shit as my slippery, wet feet slide across the wood flooring.

I manage to make it to my phone in one piece, though, and I’m pretty sure I’m only seconds away from fainting as I turn it over and see Caleb’s missed call and voicemail. I’d be embarrassed if anybody saw how frantically I make my way to the voicemail, and I tug my towel tighter around my chest as I hit play and bring my phone to my ear.

“Hey, Ev,” Caleb starts. He pauses and clears his throat before continuing. “I accidentally butt-dialed you earlier today, and I see that you answered. I’m really hoping to talk to you, but it seems I’ve caught you at a bad time.

There’s another awkward pause, and I shift my weight from foot to foot as I listen to some clanging in the background. What’s he doing?

“I’m leaving work in a few minutes, and I’m going to stop by your apartment on the way home. Feel free to text me not to come if that’s too much. I won’t be offended.”

What?

I pull my phone away from my ear and check the time.

Fuck.

He left this voicemail exactly twenty-three minutes ago.

Caleb continues to talk into my phone, but his words go in one ear and out the other as I sprint to my window and peer at the sidewalk below. I only see my car parked on the side of the road, but I know Caleb tends to shift into his wolf form and run everywhere he needs to go.

My lips purse as I frantically scan the area, and I debate texting Caleb to tell him not to come over before changing course and running into my bedroom to get changed.

There’s a knock on my door just as I tug a clean shirt over my head, and I rip open my dresser drawer to grab some leggings and a pair of socks.

“One minute!” I shout, knowing he can hear me from the hallway.

If Adam can hear my crying, I’m sure Caleb can hear me shouting from my bedroom.

The quiet knocking on my door stops, and I finish dressing in record time before hurrying into my bathroom to hang my towel and yank a comb through my hair. Every drag of the brush is painful, my tangled hair catching on the bristles, but I force it through.

I don’t have time to be gentle.

I look feral when I catch my reflection in the mirror, my back hunched and hair hanging limply, and I gasp as I force myself to straighten my spine and slow down. Who am I to be acting this crazy over some guy?

Even if he is technically my soulmate.

Clearing my throat, I set my brush down and run my fingers through my hair to give it fake volume.

“I’m coming!” I yell, stepping out of my bathroom.

I make it exactly two steps before slipping on the water I dripped earlier, and I land in a less-than-graceful heap in the middle of the room. My tailbone breaks my fall, just incredible, and I clamp my jaw shut so I don’t cry out and draw any attention.

“Ev?” Caleb says through the door. “Are you alright?”

I don’t respond, humiliation rendering me silent.

I spread my limbs on the floor before carefully rolling over and climbing to my feet. I’m careful to keep quiet so Caleb doesn’t hear me through the door, not wanting him to know I fell.

What happens between a girl and her wet floor stays between a girl and her wet floor.

I rub my spine as I make my way to the door, and I force any looks of pain out of my face as I pull open the door.

Caleb stands just beyond it, his hands clasped behind his back and face full of worry. His eyes trail down my frame, and I know he’s looking me over for injury. He most definitely heard me fall.

His clothes are disheveled, the collar of his shirt messed up and his pants full of crinkles. It confirms my assumption that he stripped and ran here, and I allow myself a quick second to wonder if he redressed outside in public or inside my lobby.

I know the wolves find nudity natural, but I’ve never loved the idea of everybody seeing Caleb naked.

My insecurity has gone rampant since the announcement of his search for a wife, and constantly hearing Jan and Gabby talk about it doesn’t help. They seem to find it a fun game to loudly talk about Caleb whenever I’m nearby, and I’ve very quickly learned it’s best to avoid the two nurses as if my life depends on it.

Thankfully they don’t seem to go out of their way to find me when I’m working in the hospital, but they don’t hold back whenever I find myself unlucky enough to be within their proximity.

Just the other day, I had the privilege of getting to hear them loudly discuss how they think he’ll fuck his new wife. Hearing it made my blood boil.

It’s part of the reason I’ve been struggling to answer his calls.

Whenever I think of Caleb, a small piece of me also thinks about his future wife. He says he’s not looking, but I’m not dumb enough to believe that blindly. I’ve learned my lesson with HPAW, and I’ll never put myself in a position to be so thoroughly played again.

“You can come inside,” I say, stepping aside.

He steps into my entryway, his nostrils flaring.

“It smells like Adam in here.”

I nod as he kicks off his shoes and walks into my living room. His eyes flicker over my space, his expression unreadable.

“He came over earlier today,” I admit.

Caleb hums, thankfully not seeming upset. A small part of me was worried he’d get angry to learn I let another man into my apartment, but I’m glad to see he doesn’t look pissed. Curious, yes, but there’s no jealousy in his expression.

“I was under the impression you two didn’t get along,” Caleb chuckles, glancing at the wall separating his and my apartments. “I’ve received multiple angry text messages informing me of your noises these past few weeks.”

I stiffen and shoot a glare at the wall.

Adam is so fucking annoying.

“Are you two friends?” I ask.

I’m going to be pissed if he says yes. I hate the thought of Adam only being nice to me because he’s trying to be a good friend to Caleb. He and I don’t necessarily get along, but I thought our unspoken truce was done organically.

Caleb shakes his head.

“No. We went to school together, but I wouldn’t necessarily say we were friends. We’re…” Caleb pauses as he thinks over his following words. “We’re friendly.”

I dip my chin.

“What school?” I pry.

Caleb shoots me a sideways glance.

“College.”

He doesn’t mention which one, and I have a feeling it’s because it was a human one. How many wolves are going to human colleges? How are they even getting in? They must be disguising their marks somehow.

“So, were you getting blowjobs, too?”

I don’t know what prompts me to ask. I know Caleb was a virgin when we met, but I suppose I never asked him about other sexual acts. I assumed he didn’t engage in them because his mark was white, but so is Adam’s.

Caleb looks surprised by my question, and his eyes dart toward Adam’s apartment before he turns back to me.

“No. We have opposing viewpoints on what saving ourselves for our mates means. I chose to refrain from all sexual acts, and Adam decided to pick and choose,” he says.

I hate to admit how good hearing him say that makes me feel.

It’s incredibly selfish considering my history, but I still feel relieved.

“So you didn’t tell Adam to come over and keep me company?” I continue to pry.

Caleb chuckles and shakes his head.

I nod, pleased to hear it, before taking a seat on my couch. Caleb joins and lowers himself into the closest chair, and we stare awkwardly at one another. I miss the days when conversation flowed easily between us.

We never ran out of things to talk about, and I loved every minute I spent with Caleb.

Now it feels like walking on eggshells.

“You said you wanted to speak with me,” I prompt.

Caleb dips his chin and clears his throat.

“Yes.” He pauses and wrings his hands together. “Have you had a chance to read the statement I put out?”

Statement? I’ve been actively avoiding any news that discusses Caleb, and I rush to grab my phone and look it up.

Caleb remains quiet while I do so, and I lean back into the couch as I pull up the statement in question. It’s short, and I can feel my blood rushing through my ears as I read every word.

Three weeks ago, a statement from my office went out regarding my search for a wife. That statement was not approved for release, and it contained inaccurate information.

Caleb doesn’t explain why, probably to save Sash from the backlash and anger of the hundreds of female wolves who will surely be pissed when they read this.

I bite the inside of my cheek and continue reading.

I want to make it clear that I am not searching for a wife.

I apologize for any inconvenience this may bring to those looking for the opportunity to fill this spot. I know there has been much speculation regarding Evelyn and her role in this decision, and I assure you that my focus is on the pack.

He goes on to spew some diplomatic statements, but there is no further mention of me.

“You didn’t mention our bond,” I say.

Caleb doesn’t respond.

“Do you ever intend to mention that it’s been restored?” I ask.

I stand and pace the length of the room.

“Do you actually ever intend to claim me as your mate again?”

The question stings as it leaves my mouth, but I have to ask. I have to know.

“Of course I do, Ev,” Caleb breathes, moving toward me.

I freeze as he enters my personal space, and instinctively I lean into his touch as he reaches out and cups my cheeks. His palms are warm, and they feel impossibly good against my skin. The tingles from our contact have my muscles softening, and I let my eyes slip shut as I breathe in his scent.

“When?” I ask.

Caleb brings his lips to my forehead.

“HPAW has been testing a new attack strategy, and we’re struggling to overcome it. Their guns now emit a high-frequency noise that overwhelms us in our wolf forms. It means we can’t shift, leaving us vulnerable to their bullets,” he whispers. “They attacked a small pack on the border two weeks ago. We weren’t prepared, and it was a slaughter.”

My heart pounds, and I wrap my arms tightly around Caleb’s waist as I wait for him to continue.

HPAW is always working on new weapons and strategies, but nothing has ever been remotely successful. The wolves are near impossible to fight, and they’re skilled at adapting to any changes HPAW implements.

Hearing that they’ve found a successful strategy is horrifying, and my blood boils at the thought of the innocent pack they attacked.

I’m sure it’s the start of many.

“They sent one man free with the message that they’re coming after me and my ‘human bitch’. I’m hoping if I let the rumor that I no longer recognize you as my mate spread, they will lose interest in you,” Caleb continues.

He runs his thumbs across my cheekbones, his touch soft.

“I can’t lose you, Evelyn.”

I press my face into his chest and squeeze him to me. This is all I wanted, for him to tell me the truth and give a genuine reason for his hesitance to claim me.

“I’m not going anywhere,” I promise.

Caleb’s heart pounds, and I listen to it thump as he slides his hands through my hair. His fingers linger on the healed cut on the back of my head, and I move my face away when he starts prodding at the small bald spot it left behind.

He reaches for it again, and I let out a tiny laugh as I swat him away.

“So what’s your plan, then?” I ask. “With HPAW?”

Caleb hesitates, and I dip my chin in resignation. He doesn’t want to tell me.

“I fear we’re going to have to fight back.”

My head snaps up. Caleb grimaces, and it takes me a moment to understand why. He’s afraid I’m not going to like that. That I’m going to choose the humans over the wolves.

I take his hands in my own.

“I’ll stand by you, Caleb. Whatever you decide,” I admit.

I mean it, too. Caleb’s spent years trying to create treaties and avoid a war, and I know he can’t continue to hold back. HPAW has been a pesky thorn in his side for a long time, but if they’ve got a strategy that works, he can’t just continue brushing them aside.

The wolves will need to fight.

Chapter 43

My cheeks and nose burn, and I bury my face in my coat as I step through the front doors of the hospital. It’s early, and I’m glad not to see anybody sitting in the waiting areas as I make my way to the side doors and slip into the back.

The coffee machine in the staff break room calls to me, and I’m pretty sure I look like a zombie as I wander drowsily down the hall.

I didn’t get a wink of sleep last night, and I’m paying for it dearly today.

The chill in my bones gradually warms as I head toward the staff room, and I tug off my hat and gloves as I push open the door.

Nobody’s inside, thankfully, and I take advantage of that as I brew myself a cup of coffee and undress. I usually hide out in the small janitor’s room connected to the break room, but getting ready for the day in the larger room is a nice treat.

Especially when I’m in my thick winter coat.

I thought Caleb was dramatic to buy me such a heavy one, but after seeing how cold this winter gets, I’m grateful for it. Me and the cold have never meshed well.

I shove my hat and gloves into my coat pockets before hanging it up. There are a few cubbies for the doctors and nurses to leave their bags and personal belongings in, but thankfully I don’t have any of that.

My first paycheck was used to purchase a card holder that sticks to the back of my phone, so now I don’t need to carry a purse with me. Plus, being the janitor comes with the bonus of being able to work with my phone on my person.

The nurses and doctors have to leave theirs behind, but I can walk around with it in my pocket.

A comforting coffee scent fills the air as I step into the connected cleaning room. The chart the last janitor made is super helpful, and I purse my lips as I look it over. I should do linens and floors today.

It’s been a few days since I last washed the hospital gowns, and somehow the floors here are in a perpetual state of stickiness.

It’s disgusting.

I yawn as I spin in search of the laundry cart. I’ll start there.

There’s a small hamper in each exam room, and it will be good to empty them before the hospital gets busy and the rooms become occupied.

I throw my hair into a loose bun as I grab the laundry cart and wheel it out of the cleaning room. Jan stands in front of the cubbies, and she loosens her braid with precise movements as she spins in my direction.

I avoid making eye contact as I wheel the laundry cart toward the door that will take me into the main hallway.

Jan watches as she pulls a few pieces of hair out of her braid. The dark strands fall around her face, framing it nicely. As much as I hate to admit it, Jan is arguably a beautiful woman. Most of the wolves are, but Jan stands out among them.

She’s tall and graceful, and when she’s interacting with her patients, she even looks friendly. I only ever see her scowl, but the smile she gives everybody else is quite pretty.

If Caleb’s search for a mate had been genuine, she would’ve been eligible. I’ve learned that her mate, Benny, died when they were five. She always seemed hesitant when Gabby encouraged her to put herself out there and try for Caleb, but she was clearly warming up to the idea.

Would Caleb have picked her?

She’s beautiful, and her job in the hospital is a respected one. I’m sure the wolves would be happy to have her as their female Alpha.

My throat burns, and I force myself to push those thoughts aside before they consume me.

“Good morning,” Jan greets me.

I lick my lips. She may sound cheery, but I know it’s all an act. Jan and Gabby have made it abundantly clear they hate me, and I have no interest in indulging either one of them.

“Evelyn?”

She waves a hand to get my attention, and I fight the urge to groan as I spin and face her.

“Yes?” I ask.

She raises a brow at my sharp tone, but I don’t apologize. She’s been nothing but rude to me, and I don’t owe her any kindness.

“What do you know about Alpha Caleb’s announcement earlier this week?”

I can tell by how her eyes flicker over me that she’s trying to read my every reaction. I’m sure there’s a lot of speculation around him and me, and I don’t want to feed into it.

“I know as much as you do,” I lie.

Jan laughs, the noise loud and abrupt. She doesn’t believe me, but that’s not my problem. I readjust my grip on my laundry cart and turn back around, preparing to leave.

“You reek of him,” she says, capturing my attention.

I shouldn’t. I took a shower before coming here today, and we haven’t been intimate since that day in the hospital all those weeks ago. Even if I did smell of him, it wouldn’t be strong. Jan’s fishing, trying to catch me off guard and make me say something I shouldn’t.

The wolves don’t think much of me, but I spent years being trained in body language and facial expressions. I’m good at reading into conversations, and I’m not going to let some random woman get the best of me.

I force myself to look calm and unassuming as I turn back to Jan.

She’s still staring at me, the woman desperate for the inside scoop.

“That’s odd,” I say.

Her jaw clenches, the action a sure sign of frustration, and I offer a slight shrug before pushing my cart into the hallway.

Greg’s just stepping out of a nearby exam room, and he rips his gloves off with a frown before turning to me.

“Morning, Ev!”

A loud scream emerges from the door he just stepped out of. It’s a child, and I can’t help but crack a smile as Greg sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose. Despite the advanced strength and healing the wolves possess, the children can’t for the life of them handle a little shot every once and a while.

Most of them cry, but we get either a screamer or a runner every once in a while.

It seems poor Greg is starting his day off with a screamer.

“I brewed myself a cup of coffee I forgot to drink. It’s still at the machine,” I say.

Greg’s smile grows.

“You’re welcome to have it,” I continue.

Greg tosses his used gloves into the nearest trash with a relieved sigh, and the kid behind the door lets out another blood-curdling scream. You’d think somebody’s being murdered in there. Following the cry are frantic shushes from the parents, and I can only imagine the embarrassment they’re feeling right now.

“I don’t know what I’d do without you, Ev,” Greg laughs, approaching. I step to the side and push my cart away from the break room door. “I made the mistake of telling the little man he needed a vaccine, and he’s sure making me pay for it. I need all the boost I can get before going back in there.”

Greg disappears into the break room, and I let out a quiet laugh as I make my way into the first exam room. There’s a small basket in the corner of each room for people to throw their gowns into, and I dump what’s in there into the large laundry cart.

Only about three gowns fall out, and I repeat this process with all the open rooms before heading back to the break room.

Thankfully Jan is nowhere to be seen, and I get a load of laundry started before grabbing my vacuum and getting to work on the floors.

It’s easier to do now that I’ve built up some muscle in my arms and back, and I stick some earphones in and blast music while I clean. It makes the day go by faster, and I’ve already gotten a good amount done by the time I need to switch the laundry over.

The hospital gradually begins to pick up, too. It never gets busy, but there are usually just enough patients that it doesn’t feel completely desolate.

A small part of me was a bit upset when I first got this job, but now I’m glad. Had I ended up working in the library as I initially wanted, I’d be surrounded by people all day long. The wolves are a bit nicer to me after my conversation with Mary, but they’re still cold and distant.

The baristas no longer pretend they don’t notice me when I come in, but my drinks are still overly sweetened and usually only a third of the way full.

“Evelyn!”

I pull out my headphones and spin around.

Jan stands in the doorway, her expression sour.

“Alpha Caleb is in the lobby,” she says.

She spins on her heel and disappears a moment later, and I finish folding the gown I’m holding before making my way to the lobby. Why is Caleb here?

He’s the one who’s insisting we keep space between us when we’re in public, and this is doing exactly the opposite. I’m sure Jan’s already reaching out to all her friends to inform them of his visit. Everybody’s going to know by the time I leave here today.

Fuck.

My footsteps quicken, and I take a moment to compose myself before pushing through the lobby doors.

Caleb is standing in the center of the room, but he’s in a deep conversation with Greg so I linger near the doors and wait.

He and Greg continue to talk, and poor Greg looks like he’s about to bust an artery as he huffs and runs a hand through his hair. The man doesn’t seem to be having a great day, and I shift my weight from foot to foot as their conversation drags.

What are they talking about?

After a few minutes, Greg spins and leaves.

“That man is a pain in my fucking ass,” he mumbles as he passes me.

Caleb’s lips twitch as he fights a smile. Most wolves are painfully polite to Caleb, but it’s common knowledge that Greg calls everything a pain in his ass. I’m pretty sure he says the expression a good thirty times a day, the words varying in intensity depending on how frustrated he is.

He doesn’t sound too angry this time.

Caleb’s eyes flash to me as Greg disappears behind the doors I stand in front of, and I find myself nervously tugging on the hem of my shirt as his gaze travels down my body. I wasn’t expecting to see him today, so I don’t bother trying to look nice. My hair’s still in the bun I threw it in earlier, and I’m wearing the least flattering shirt I own.

The material got all stretched out from me tucking my knees into it while I read at the library, and I need to throw it away.

I will be throwing it away after today, and I curse myself for not doing so earlier.

My feet carry me to Caleb, but they slow as his expression shifts into one of confusion. What am I missing here?

“You wanted to see me?” I ask.

Caleb licks his lips and shakes his head.

“No. I came here to talk with Greg.”

His answer is sharp, and I resist the urge to flinch. Fucking Jan. She knew Caleb wasn’t here to see me, and she probably just wanted to watch me embarrass myself. I glance toward the reception desk, unsurprised to see her sitting behind it.

She’s pretending not to pay attention, but I’m not stupid.

I work my jaw side to side. I could tattle on her, a big part of me really fucking wants to, but instead, I bite my tongue and turn back to Caleb. We agreed to publicly keep our distance until he’s got a better handle on HPAW, and I should’ve known he wouldn’t come here and visit me like this.

My cheeks warm, and Caleb’s fingers twitch before he turns toward the reception desk and approaches Jan.

Despite knowing it’s all an act, the rejection still stings.

He leans over the desk to speak to her, his voice low as he asks her to send him a copy of several documents I’ve never heard of nor will I ever remember the name of. She nods and writes them down, her loose hair falling into her face.

Caleb knocks on the desk as he straightens back up, and Jan bats her eyelashes as she watches. I should rip those fucking eyelashes off.

“Of course, Caleb,” she purrs, her voice loud. I’m sure she wants me to hear. My eye twitches, and I fight the urge to do something stupidly embarrassing. “I’ll have those sent over—“

“Alpha,” Caleb interjects, correcting her.

Jan looks shocked, her eyes growing comically wide before she dips her chin in acknowledgment. It makes me feel better than it should.

I’m being petty.

And jealous.

And even a bit spiteful.

Caleb turns his back to her and returns to me. I do my best not to look upset, but I’m sure he can still see it. He can read me better than I’d care for him to be able to.

“I’ve been informed that you’re playing loud music late into the night. If you could please try and keep it down, I’d appreciate it,” he says.

Are you fucking kidding me? I turned it off by ten PM, and it wasn’t even that loud.

“I hate him,” I blurt. “I hate Adam with every inch of my body.”

Caleb places a hand over his mouth to hide his smile, and he clears his throat and straightens his spine before dropping it.

“Good to know,” he says, back to his formal tone. “Goodbye, Evelyn.”

He’s turning and leaving a second later, and I stare at his back as I debate my following words. I shouldn’t do it. I know I shouldn’t do it.

It’s only feeding the fire.

I’m better than this, and I need to rise above.

“Goodbye, Caleb.”

I do it anyway, and I take great pleasure in seeing the anger in Jan’s eyes when he doesn’t correct me. Caleb’s gone a second later, and I struggle to hold back my haughty smirk as I walk back through the doors and return to work.

Chapter 44

Adam stands at my door with a shit-eating grin, and I roll my eyes before stepping aside to make room for him to come in.

“Stop tattling on me,” I say, still annoyed about him telling Caleb I was listening to music the other day.

The volume wasn’t even that loud, and I know I turned it off at a reasonable time. You’d think being around children all day would have taught Adam how annoying tattling is, but I suppose it’s not exactly a secret that he’s no better than a child.

No wonder his student like him so much. They probably see him as one of them.

Adam’s smile grows as he welcomes himself inside my apartment.

He’s taken it upon himself to visit me every few days, and I’m not quite sure how I feel about it just yet. We’ve established an odd frenemy relationship, and recently he’s been coming over almost every day to eat my foot and complain about the other teachers at his school.

It’s more enjoyable than I’d care to admit.

“I wouldn’t need to tattle on you if you behaved respectfully,” Adam argues.

I shut my door as he kicks off his slippers and walks into my kitchen. I made a batch of cookies yesterday night, and he beelines it straight for them. I have half a mind to tell him he can’t eat them, but I remain silent as he rips off the container’s lid and grabs three.

I made more than I’ll realistically end up eating, and I’d hate for them to go to waste.

“It’s no wonder this apartment was available on such short notice. You’re a horrible neighbor, and I’m sure the landlord was glad to finally have somebody agree to live near you,” I say.

Adam shakes his head and shoves a cookie into his mouth.

“This apartment wasn’t empty. Alpha Caleb offered the previous tenants an excessive amount of money to break their lease and move out. This building has a great security system and is in one of the most walkable neighborhoods. Everybody wants to live here,” Adam explains, clearly enjoying my look of complete shock. “Alpha Caleb tried to pay me to move, too, so he could tear down our connecting wall and turn the entire floor into one unit, but I told him fuck no.

“I’ve been living here for almost six years, and it’ll be a cold day in hell before I move out. My furniture perfectly matches the space, and I got locked in at pretty cheap rent.” Adam stands and moves to my fridge to pour himself a glass of milk. “Although, if I knew how annoying my new neighbor was going to be, I might have taken him up on the offer.”

I’m too shocked to feel offended by his sly dig. Caleb bought the old tenants out and tried to do the same with Adam? My apartment is already large enough, and I’m shocked Caleb went through so much effort.

He could barely even look me in the eye when he moved me out of his house and into here.

I take a seat, my legs suddenly weak.

God, I’m a fucking idiot.

“Are you and Alpha Caleb fighting again?” Adam asks, changing the subject.

What?

My mind is still reeling over everything he just told me, and I shake my head as I prepare myself for this sudden shift in conversation.

Adam sits back down and takes a long sip of his drink. I’ve never been a massive fan of milk, but Adam drinks so much I’ve been needing to buy whole gallons instead of the half ones I usually get. Soon I’m going to start making him bring over his own.

Now that I’m using my own money, I don’t have the extra funds to support his milk addiction. I doubt Caleb would mind if I used his card every once in a while; I know he wouldn’t care, but I don’t want to.

I’m working hard to become entirely independent.

“What makes you think we’re fighting,” I ask, playing dumb.

Adam furrows his brows, and I can tell we’re both playing the same game. He wants to get all the information he can get from me without giving anything away, and I want to do the same.

“I was under the impression you two decided to make up, but now everybody’s talking about how he publicly shunned you at the hospital yesterday,” he says.

I wouldn’t necessarily describe what happened between us in the hospital lobby as a shunning. My lips twitch, and I feel my face reddening as I realize Jan must be going around telling a story vastly different than what actually happened.

She’s probably also telling people she called him Caleb and that he asked her personally to send him some files.

My annoyance toward that woman grows with every passing day.

Adam cocks his head to the side, waiting for my response.

What even gave him the impression that Caleb and I decided to make up? My eyes dart toward the wall separating our apartments. I bet he was eavesdropping on our conversation. Nosy son of a bitch.

He didn’t even listen accurately.

Caleb confided in me about what’s been going on with HPAW, I told him to do what he needs to do to protect his people, and then he awkwardly kissed me before leaving. I wouldn’t describe any of that as ‘making up.’

It was unspoken, but I’m pretty sure we’re on the same page to continue living as usual. I’m still not pleased with his decision to hide me away like some big shameful secret, but at least I understand it now.

“Well?” Adam prompts when I take too long to respond.

I sigh.

“Alpha Caleb and I aren’t anything.”

I’ve grown to begrudgingly enjoy Adam’s company, but I’d by no means say I trust him. I don’t think he’s told anybody about how old I was when HPAW began encouraging me to have sex, which I suppose I’m taking as a positive sign, but that’s not enough to earn my trust.

Especially when I know how up-to-date he is on the recent gossip.

It hasn’t even been twenty-four hours since Caleb came to the hospital, and already he knows about it.

I’m willing to bet he’s gossiping with all his student’s parents. I doubt the children know everything, third graders too young to grasp all the nuances of my rumored relationship with Caleb. I’m sure they overhear bits and pieces from their parents, but it probably wouldn’t be enough for Adam to get the complete picture.

No.

My annoying neighbor is gossiping about me with other adults.

“What else have you heard about me?” I ask.

Adam shrugs, and I click my tongue against the roof of my mouth. He’s so fucking annoying.

What’s the point of having him over and letting him eat all my cookies if he isn’t going to give me all the information he has? That’s literally the only use of him.

“Anyway…” Adam awkwardly trails off as the silence between us stretches. “Are you going to Alpha Caleb’s birthday party?”

His birthday party? My gut churns, and I clench my jaw to keep my emotions at bay. I had no idea Caleb’s birthday was coming up, and I feel horrible over the realization that I never took the time to ask.

Caleb knows when mine is. It was one of the first things he asked me when we met, but I was so frazzled and scared he’d see through my lie that I never thought to ask him back. Then, in the months that followed, it never occurred to me.

Why learn somebody’s birthday when they’ll be dead before seeing it?

Adam leans back in his chair and grabs another cookie as he watches my emotions flicker across my face. I do my best to keep them hidden, but I’m sure a few filter through.

“No. I haven’t heard about any party,” I admit.

Adam looks annoyingly pleased by that. He always enjoys it when he has information I want, the man loving the power it gives him.

I feel bad for the mate he ends up with. The wolves believe their mates are the person meant specifically for them, the one who compliments them in every way, but she’ll need to be fucking saint to handle Adam.

If Caleb were anything like him, I don’t think I’d have had so many issues completing my mission.

“Well, are you going to tell me about it?” I huff.

Adam’s smile grows, and I bite the inside of my cheek to keep from lashing out.

“Please.”

The word is acid on my tongue.

“Well, since you asked so nicely.” Adam takes his sweet time chewing and swallowing a bite of his cookie before continuing. “Sash throws a big party every year for Alpha Caleb. I know she’s been banished and all that, but the party’s still happening. It’s a pretty informal event, but everybody in the pack goes.”

Why didn’t Caleb ever mention this to me?

I gnaw at my bottom lip, feeling uncomfortable. I’m sure Caleb would have mentioned it if he wanted me to come.

It’s not like we’re talking that often, but there’s been more than a few opportunities for him to acknowledge it. Even if he didn’t want to make a big deal about it, he could have sent a text just to let me know.

A small part of me wants to think he forgot, but Caleb is much too organized to forget about a big party.

Especially one he’s meant to be hosting.

“I’m not sure if that’s a good idea,” I admit.

Adam stands and moves to my window. He pushes it open every time he visits, and I pull open my fridge to distract myself.

I suppose I can’t blame Caleb for wanting a night out without me. If I go, I don’t doubt there’ll be an uncomfortable amount of attention on me. The wolves will watch my every move, and I’m sure Caleb doesn’t want to deal with that stress. Especially on his birthday.

Fuck.

I need to get him a birthday present.

“When is the party?” I ask.

“Next Friday.”

I nod. “And that’s Caleb’s birthday?”

Adam laughs, and I turn to shoot him a sharp glare before slamming my fridge door shut. I’m fully aware that I should know this already, but I don’t and I don’t need Adam laughing and making me feel worse than I already do.

“Yes, his birthday is that Friday,” Adam answers.

I internally curse. That’s not a lot of time to get a present. I wasn’t planning on buying anything extra this pay cycle, and I planned for most of my money to go to groceries. I waited until my paycheck went through before grocery shopping, and my shelves were already so low that I spent a couple hundred to get myself back at a manageable level.

I’d rather die than use Caleb’s own money to buy him a present, though.

Maybe I can hand-make him something.

It won’t be as nice, but it’s the thought that counts. Caleb seems to enjoy sentimental things, so I think he’d like that.

“So, do you think you’re going to come?” Adam asks.

I shrug.

“Probably not.”

He juts out his bottom lip in a dramatic pout, and I roll my eyes before glancing at my phone. It’s getting pretty late.

“Why not? You should come,” Adam urges. “It’s a lot of fun, and just about everybody goes. I hate to say this, but you need to get out and do something. Your life has become sad, and I’m happy to take the responsibility of socializing you.”

Socializing me? I’m not a fucking dog.

Adam shoots me a sickly sweet smile, and I just know he wants me to argue.

I won’t give him the satisfaction, though, and instead, I plaster a matching smile on my face. Two can play this game.

“I’ll think about it,” I promise.

An involuntary shiver backs up my words, and Adam pulls my window shut before returning to my kitchen island. He steals another cookie, this one I think his fourth, and sets the lid back on the container.

A small part of me expects him to steal the entire thing, and I’m pleasantly surprised when he slides it back into place.

I’m just glad somebody’s around to enjoy my baking.

I made the cookies as a precaution in case Caleb came over, but it’s been two days and they’re going to go stale soon. I can make a fresh batch if Caleb ever decides to bring himself to my apartment.

“I wouldn’t want to ruin his birthday by being there,” I admit. “I’m sure Caleb would appreciate being able to celebrate his birthday without my existence stealing the attention.”

It’s not fun to say it out loud, but I’m sure we all know it to be true.

For the first time s sd, Adam looks genuinely upset. He opens and shuts his mouth a few times, clearly struggling with what to say, before he shakes his head in rejection of my words.

“That’s not true. I listen to you guys all the time. I’m sure Alpha Caleb would love to have you there, even if he can’t outwardly express it during the party,” he says.

I glance at the ceiling and blink a few times to try and dry my eyes. I don’t like when Adam is nice to me. That’s not how our relationship works, and I’m too emotionally unstable to hear any kind words without bursting into tears.

“That’s it,” Adam says, jumping to his feet. He moves to the door and shoves his feet into his slippers. “You’re coming to the party, and we’re going to have the best time.”

He’s out of my apartment a second later. I stare at the door, shocked by his sudden departure. I bet he did it so I wouldn’t argue with him, and I huff as I storm over to it and peer into the hallway. He’s already back in his apartment, and I debate my next move before knocking on his door.

He doesn’t answer, the greasy bastard, and I kick the wood before jiggling the knob.

“I’m not going!” I shout.

Adam still doesn’t respond, and I resist the urge to scream as I head back into my apartment and slam the door. He’s so annoying, and I grab my phone and turn some upbeat pop music on to piss him off.

I’m sure he’s texting Caleb right now to complain, but I don’t give two shits.

I’ve said it once before, and I’ll say it again. If he doesn’t like my noises, he can shut his fucking ears.

Chapter 45

My face is flaming as I hand Mary my book returns. She saw them when she checked me out the other day, but I can’t help but feel a little awkward having her see my books.

I’ve been getting a bit more daring with my reads, and some of these are pretty naughty.

“Does Caleb have access to my library card?” I ask. “Like, can he see what books I check out?”

Mary sucks her cheeks into her mouth to hide her smile, and I shift my weight from foot to foot as she drops her head to her chest and snickers. It’s not that funny.

“No, Ev, he can’t see the books you’re reading,” she answers.

She continues to laugh, and I huff as she scans the last of my books and sets them in her return cart.

“We got a new shipment of books in last week, and I think you might like a few of them.” She lifts a hand and points toward the small table across from the reception desk.

It’s where she puts all the new releases, and I clutch my library card to my chest as I meander my way over there. I can tell by the covers that a few will be right up my alley, and I don’t hesitate to flip them over and read the descriptions.

I end up picking three, and I make my way to Mary to check them out.

I know I’m allowed to check out more than this, but I try to limit myself so I don’t go overboard. I’d hate to forget about a book and get charged a late fee. Money is scarce enough as it is, and I don’t need to waste any on silly mistakes.

“Are you going to Caleb’s birthday party?” I ask, handing over my books.

Mary looks shocked by my question, and I regret asking it almost immediately. I wish Adam would’ve never told me about the damn party. Ignorance is bliss, and now that I know about it, it’s all I can think of.

“Probably,” she says. “Just about everybody does. Are you going?”

I shrug, still undecided. Adam seems pretty intent on bringing me, but I’m not sure if that’s a good idea.

“You should,” Mary urges.

She scans my card before checking out my books and slipping a piece of paper with the due date between the front pages. I clear my throat, struggling to think of a response.

Does she actually think I should go? I don’t want to go somewhere where I’m not wanted and make a fool of myself.

“Do you know what you’re going to wear?” Mary continues. “Everybody dresses up.”

Frowning, I glance down at myself. I don’t own anything nice. Caleb purchased me a full wardrobe when I first moved in with him, but I don’t own anything fancier than a sundress. He tried to pick a few nicer items, but I wasn’t interested.

I felt guilty about how much money he was spending, and the dresses he was looking at were expensive.

Shit.

I should have let him buy me one or two.

My bank account is already laughably low right now, and after buying Caleb a birthday present, I’m not going to have anything left over.

“I have a few sundresses to choose from,” I say.

Mary scoffs, and I self-consciously cross my arms over my chest. I could do without the judgment.

“You can not show up to that party in a sundress.” Mary pushes back her chair and stands with a huff, and she looks me over before grabbing her purse from under her desk and waving for me to follow. “Come on.”

I jolt and mindlessly jog after her. She rounds the reception desk and heads toward the library’s front doors, her pace fast and full of purpose.

“Where are we going?” I ask.

“To get you a dress. I’d tell you to have Alpha Caleb take you out, but he has no fucking style and you clearly need help.”

Need help? I have style.

Blood rushes through my ears, and I’m pretty sure I must be hallucinating. I have to be. There’s no way the woman who tried to kill me all those weeks ago is now taking me shopping.

I bet Adam put her up to this.

Caleb’s pack is small, and everybody knows everybody here. I wouldn’t put it past Adam to have messaged her with the demand to take me out. He knows I’d never go with him, and I know damn well he has no issues telling people what to do.

He’s always trying to boss me around.

“You have to drive. I don’t have a car,” Mary says as she pushes open the library doors.

It’s probably a stupid idea to go with her, but I do it anyway. I’ve never gone shopping before, and I’ve always wondered what it would be like.

“Aren’t you going to get in trouble for leaving work?” I ask.

Mary laughs.

“Alpha Caleb is my boss, and I highly doubt he’d punish me for shopping with his mate.”

I gulp. She called me his mate.

The wolves usually refer to me as Caleb’s ex-mate, emphasizing the ex. They love pointing it out in news articles, and it’s been so long since I’ve heard otherwise.

It feels good, and despite knowing I should probably correct Mary, I don’t.

We make our way to my car in relative silence, and I unlock it when she reaches the passenger door. I hope this isn’t some elaborate plan to get me alone and kill me, but I assume if she were trying to do that, she wouldn’t have so publicly pushed for us to be alone.

If I turned up dead, there would be too many witnesses to say that she and I had left the library together.

Unless all the wolves are in on it.

I shake my head, not wanting these thoughts to sink too deep. It’s highly improbable that Mary’s about to kill me. My heart still races as I get into my car, though, and I do my best to avoid looking at her as I put my car in reverse and follow her instructions.

I don’t know how I will pay for this, but I suppose I don’t need food that badly. I’ll need to get something cheap, but I’m not too picky about what I wear so that shouldn’t be an issue.

Mary gives me directions to the shop she has in mind. It’s in a part of the pack I’ve never been in before, and I admire the small shopping center with an appreciative hum as I park my car and step outside.

I yank my coat tightly around my body, and Mary hardly seems bothered by the weather as she leads the way.

My heart plummets the second we step into the small store.

This place screams expensive.

A woman rushes up to us the moment we enter, her brown eyes flickering rapidly between Mary and me. She’s wearing a fancy pantsuit, the black fabric complimenting her figure more than anything I own does to mine.

“Good afternoon, Mary,” she greets, ignoring me. “What can I help you with today?”

Mary pivots toward me.

“We’re here to get Ev a dress for Alpha Caleb’s birthday party.”

The woman’s eyes go comically wide before she levels the expression. Is it that shocking to hear I’m going to the party? Maybe I shouldn’t go. Adam is probably blowing smoke up my ass.

“It’s nice to meet you, Evelyn. I’m Stella.” Her tone indicates she’s not actually excited to meet me, but I ignore it and offer a wide smile.

Kill them with kindness.

Stella leads me to the back, and my palms grow disgustingly sweaty as she hammers me with questions about silhouettes and fabrics I have no idea how to answer. I thought shopping would be fun, but I realize quickly that I’m in way over my head.

Mary seems to realize it, too, as she takes over answering Stella’s questions.

They end up picking out four dresses I know I’ll never be able to buy, but I’m too embarrassed to say I can’t afford them.

Eventually, I’m pushed into a changing room, and I stare at myself in the mirror for a long minute before getting undressed.

I look tired, and I lightly tap my cheeks in a sad attempt to bring some life to my face. It doesn’t work, and I settle with fluffing up my hair and straightening my spine so I look less horrified. Being in this shop has drained every bit of life out of me.

The first dress they hand me is a short gold number that clings to me like a second skin. I’m not sure how I feel about the color, but Mary and Stella answer that question as they push me back into the changing room the moment I open the curtain.

“That color doesn’t compliment you,” Mary says. “Try on the black one.”

There are two black dresses, and I settle for the floor-length one. It clings to me like the gold dress. I rarely wear form-fitting clothes, but I know Caleb always enjoyed it when I did. He wouldn’t be able to take his eyes off me.

The irrationally jealous side of me wants all the women at the party to see him wanting me.

I’m sure plenty will be hoping to catch his attention.

The dress looks good, and the fabric clings to my every curve. The neckline is a bit more revealing than I’m used to, but it isn’t so low that I’m worried about my nipples making a surprise appearance.

I like the dress, and I’m sure my face shows that as I pull open the curtain.

Stella nods, pleased.

“Spin around,” she says.

I’m quick to do so, and she and Mary evaluate me for a long moment while I awkwardly stand in the changing room doorway.

“You need shoes and jewelry,” Stella decides.

“Oh!” I step forward to stop her. “I don’t need all that.”

I can’t afford it. I turn to the side and scramble to check the price tag on the dress, and I feel about ready to cry as I spot the number. Ah, fuck. This is more than I have in my account.

“Don’t worry about the price,” Mary says, her voice low. “Stella will charge it to Alpha Caleb’s account.”

I look around, my eyes lingering on the small section of men’s clothes in the corner. Does he shop here, too? I suppose there probably aren’t a lot of upscale boutiques in the pack, especially ones that sell men’s clothing.

“I want to pay for myself,” I admit.

Stella grabs some jewelry from a case before making her way to the wall of shoes.

“Male wolves like to provide. It’s a source of pride for them, and it will be seen as a slight if you try to pay for this dress.” Mary steps closer as her voice grows even quieter. “People are talking about your job at the hospital, and they’re beginning to speak poorly about Alpha Caleb for forcing you into that position. They don’t like you, but they pity you after hearing about your history.”

I snap my jaw shut with a click.

“They pity me?” I ask. I don’t want to be pitied.

Mary nods and clears her throat.

“It’s the lesser of two evils, Ev. Let Alpha Caleb buy this for you,” she urges.

Stella grabs a pair of shoes and returns to us, and Mary steps away and smiles as if our conversation never happened.

“Those are perfect!” Mary gasps and takes the jewelry Stalls picked out.

It is beautiful, and I pray the diamonds aren’t real.

Stella has me turn around so she can clasp the necklace around my neck, and she adjusts it while I put on the earrings and slip on the shoes.

It feels weird being all dressed up, and I turn and look at myself in the mirror.

I don’t even recognize myself, and Mary and Stella begin to shower me with lewd compliments as they watch me looking at myself. It’s embarrassing, which I bet is why they’re doing it in the first place.

After a few moments I step back into the changing room to put my clothes back on, and my cheeks are still red by the time I emerge and hand Stella the items. She brings them to the register, and I find myself holding my breath as I watch her walk away.

She’s in a noticeably better mood than she was when we arrived, and I have a feeling it has something to do with the commission check she’s about to get.

Adam told me about commission checks salespeople get, and I’m sure Stella purposefully picked out some of the most expensive things in the store. It’s a bit annoying, but I’d do the same if I were in her position.

“I assume I’ll be putting this on Caleb’s account?” Stella asks.

I glance at Mary, and she gives a subtle nod.

I’m so fucking uncomfortable that I’m going to get a rash.

“Yes, please,” I choke out.

Stella ignores my croaky voice as she rings my things up and places them in a nice garment bag. I avoid looking at the number on the register as she does so, too horrified to see. I’m charging Caleb an arm and a leg on an outfit to a party he didn’t even invite me to.

Fuck.

Stella hands me my things, and I accept them with quiet thanks. This was a bad idea, and Caleb is going to be pissed.

I follow Mary out of the store like an angry teenager, and she takes one look at my pained expression before dissolving into loud laughter.

“Are you always this anxious? Alpha Caleb’s probably going to get a hard-on when he hears you charged his account,” she assures.

I bite the insides of my cheeks. I can list about forty things off the top of my head that make Caleb hard, and spending his money is very low on that list. In fact, it doesn’t even make the cut.

“Right, well, I should get back to work,” Mary says, stepping back.

I gasp and turn away as she rips off her shirt. I avoid looking anywhere in her direction as I make my way to my car, and she continues to laugh at me as she strips in the middle of the street and shifts into her wolf form.

I don’t think I’ll ever get used to that.