Hey Saucy ones,

So I'm getting back into videos, but it's slow going

I should have Look Outside Available for you all by the end of the day. It should have been available for you a couple days ago but I just... had a hard time finding the will to do it. It's not even just a work thing, I've been having a hard time finding the energy to write my novel, try cooking new things, or even going to the gym. Hell writing this right now is taking some oomph. The funny thing though is once I can finally get myself started I just fly right into it.

I had a second channel video I was going to make but after seeing how far behind I already was on look outside and feel just how... tired I was, I decided that now is not the time to go flying back into unhealthy habits of working through weekends and burning out over diminishing returns from YouTube. I already had a couple days last week and this week where I stayed up til like, 1 or 2 am writing and editing and I know that that sort of thing is a bad idea no matter how much work you get done in those hours.

It's not all malaise though.

Things did get done. I've ordered the blank aprons and already got them delivered since I can just press out only what I need and then any leftover blanks just get saved for next year. I also set up the order for the patches and I'm just waiting for the numbers to settle down for yearly charges before finalizing the order. I also did end up buying a laptop even if I won't need to for cooking streams (or many streams at all for that matter) because it was thankfully in the budget. Part of the justification is that they aren't getting any cheaper but the main reason I ended up trekking out to microcenter after spending weeks researching which one would be the best thing I could get at a "reasonable" price is because of something I've realized over the years of dong this: Being cooped up in my office that is the same place where you also try to blow off steam isn't good for me on either end of that equation: when I'm trying to work I can easily get distracted by games, social media, etc since I've got three screens here for recording and editing and When I'm just trying to play some games for fun that little Microsoft word icon is just staring at my in my task bar, reminding me of how far behind I am all the time. I still haven't gotten the laptop out of the damn box and set up yet though so just add that to the big to-do list.

Addressing an Underlying Cause

I need to separate myself from distraction and also get out more. Something that's pretty hard to convey to people who work more traditional jobs is that making youtube videos is a very, very isolated task: you have zero coworkers, zero customers to interface with, you don't even have an immediate superior. It's just you in your office all day. Just going out to a coworking space, a starbucks, or even a bar to get some work done's gonna be good for my headspace because it's getting me out of the office. Now that I think of it, I think part of the reason I'd spend 3 hours a day at the gym was because even if I wasn't talking to anyone, it's an excuse to be around people. The quality of a video lives and dies by the creator's headspace and you can't have a very good headspace when you could theoretically never leave you home for days on end thanks to work. Setting up the pomodoro method thing where after every hour of work I'd get up, leave the apartment, and walk around the neighborhood for a bit worked wonders for headspace. Let's see what separating myself from my office for a bit can do.

It's not all buying fancy hardware though...

Another thing I'm less so trying out and more so returning to is physically writing out my outlines in journals. I tried the legal pad thing where I actively took notes while playing for a while but I found that between taking notes while playing and being focused enough on whatever I was playing to take in everything that I couldn't do one without distracting myself from the other. Originally the idea was to just brainstorm second channel video ideas in here but I also wanna see about just scribbling down my thoughts after sessions of playing games or research to keep them with me after the fact so that when I got o make a formal outline of a video I'm not trying to recall things that happened days or even weeks ago. For example, here's that second channel video that I may or may not still do

These journals are great because on top of the tactile nature of them, they can go just about anywhere. Back in the day before I went full time I used to write my video scripts in them during slow parts at work so that I could get them done, type up a second draft, and make the videos when i was off. It worked well enough. It'll help my case too that if I just have one on me at all times like I used to before the pandemic I can be out and about and then when I have an idea for something related to a video, I can just write it down on the spot and not have to worry about forgetting.

I'm gonna be making AT LEAST one video this week for the second channel and getting most of the way through a fresh VTMB 2 playthrough for the final summerween video. Expect Look Outside by the end of tomorrow at the latest.

That's all for now, stay saucy.