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It’s another episode of Constellation, Last Stand Media’s conversational podcast! Chris Ray Gun (tiny big-headed blind freak) is at the helm yet again, joined by MrMattyPlays (todd howard simp), Lord Cognito (xbox shill), and none other than Gene Park (beauty pageant judge)! Matty selfishly regales us with tales of his wedding and true love in front of three painfully single people. Gene swerves the conversation to our history with Ubisoft (stewards of the acclaimed Skull & Bones franchise) and how Assassin's Creed Shadows is shaping up post-delay. Cog takes us on a winding path about our favorite drinks, poisons, and elixirs. Chris ends with what is essentially a show and tell about video game special editions. It’s literally just “look at the cool things I have” the entire time. This fellow is a genuine jerk. Someone should knock his block off.

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Comments

Drew Lee

What a description lol

Michael Welter

Lol Chris with that episode description. Also another Chris hosted episode? I am so down!

Oba

Whoever wrote this description should write them all, absolutely gold

Denim Dan

Dagan looking a little different

Dante B

Well, at least you’re self aware.

Fella

You’re a silly little critter, Chris

Michael

How much longer must we wait for Tom Sweeney and Derrick to be on Stelly???

Breno Bezerra Bluhm

Haven’t listened to it yet but the description is top tier lmao

Your Boi Nicky V

This is a GOAT lineup, more Chris hosting please.

Bert Chintus

Lmao I love when Gene talks about his life, dude is such a rockstar.

SweatyNReady

Haven't laughed this hard in a while

C'mon down to Bobby's Bear Necks N' Critter Giblets and get yourself some tasty fixins

Chris does a really great job hosting Stelly, it always feels a little more conversational and organic. No knock on other hosting styles but constellation can sometimes feel like more of checking dialogue boxes and moving down a list rather than a full fledged conversation where everyone is involved. Love the tangents and meandering off topic on this one too, the Mount Rushmore of terrible games industry peeps was amazing.

Zack's Nitrous Blue Balls

Disappointed that Dagan wasn't here, but holy crap this lineup is S tier anyway!

Derek Alcott

It's great to hear the guys relate to me when it comes to dating. The apps are horrible and not worth your time. Some of the standards set by women on there is wild. I know this comes off rude like I'm criticizing all women on the apps. Being 5'7 nerdy bald guy it can be difficult. I really shine with my personality but the only way I can show that is by meeting me in person. You start texting a woman on there and she just suddenly stops without an explanation. Or I had a woman ask when I'm going to buy her a louis vitton purse on our first date. You begin to feel like many of them are just looking for a professional athlete or some super rich very good-looking tall man. I get the vibes that some just want to text when they are laying in bed because they like the feeling of flirtation but really have no intention of actually meeting.

Robbie Agnew

Greta episode, good job chris

Big Devin Energy

Hey Cog - if you get sick of coconut water - get a jug of Biosteel off of Amazon. It’s less than a buck a scoop and it’s electrolytes and BCAAs no sugar. Drink it Peri-Workout.

Johnny Lamotte

Another great episode and crew. Sometimes I’m having a rough day and then Gene talks about his cancer and I’m just like.. dang.. I’m just being a baby. Love you gene! You are a rockstar.

Ben Haner

Before they even said it I said to myself “this might be the best constellation yet”.

Birds Aren't Real

Gene, The Last of Us 2 sold incredibly well. I don't know why you said it didn't with such authority. In the Insomniac leak it was 3rd in total revenue. Ghost of Tsushima was at 6.

Kimon Togrou

Chris hosting genuinely great

Nick Shirt

Agree with everyone on the show that this was one of the great episodes. Chris is a perfect fit as host!

Sofreeto Bandito

Love Colin and what he has built but man we need more episodes like this. The group at LSM is fire and the personalities are dope. I’m even down for more one on one episodes. Cog and Micah, Matty and Chris, gene and anyone else. LFG! End glazing now.

ChickenKicker

Matty stressing about being a father is a joke, Apple created the iPad so we don’t have to worry about it

Trill Spencer

Holy shit Gene, the Dharma beer story is the coolest thing I’ve heard in a while lol (minus the drunk driving and alcoholism)

Stanley Stoopish

This episode FUCKING OWNS. They dynamic here is actually so good. Seriously my favorite Constellation episode thus far.

Bartevious

Thank you Chris for referencing the assassins creed literal trailers those are deeply entrenched in my late childhood

AllTooEasy_

Crazy to have this much Ubisoft misque talk and no mention of Skull and Bones.

Black Detective in Dexter

Gene, love you man, but it's not cool to talk about how much money you make and all the women you bang. It's very douchey.

Uvula Smack

It’s crazy in todays society the general consensus is that 30 is too immature to have kids.

FoundWaldo

As a Haitian, i resonate with Chris & Coquito. We make a similar drink called Cremas. Literally the same drink but we use Haitian rum, and boy its STRONG. Highly recommend to all here

Andre Ordonez

One of the best constellations. It was a hysterical group I’ve never heard together before. Chris had me dying as a host too, good stuff.

Daddy T

Gene saying that coke would put him to sleep ain’t helping the lying allegations lol

NeO JD

I can relate to Chris on the Ensure, but for us it was Boost. My cousin would get cases by the loads and we’d all just game in his basement drinking Boost like nobody’s business. 😅

Honest Abe

Chris is a great host for constellation

Tristan Kimball

Loved this episode. Chris you might be the best host for constellation. My favorite part was Gene talking about his past with alcohol. I’m glad you were able to sober up man you went fucking hard. Im not sure you would be here with us today if you didn’t stop

Heezy

Bitburger is like the worst german beer there is. We called it “shitburger” when i lived there

Dave Barr

Best constellation episode I’ve heard so far. They may have talked over each other a bit but the cast of characters were great and had amazing experiences that coincided with each other. Thanks for the entertainment guys.

Ben Bailey

This episode was great… though I’m getting a bit tired of Gene’s obviously exaggerated and/or fabricated stories

Dante's Alighieri Hogs

Definitely have Chris host these every once in a while Colin can get a little "stale" sometimes.

Michael Mashpotato

I can’t wait for Chris to get married to Sydney Sweeney.

Stuart Rodda

Best episode of Stelly ever!

Marco Maluf

Gene is so precious, simply unfiltered, Love it!

Eli Aboukassam

Really late comment here but if Colin or anyone from LSM is reading this: this episode's host group was by far one of the best ever. This was honestly one of my fave Constellation eps!