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MAG 170 - Recollection (Patreon)

Published:
2020-06-03 14:59:09
Imported:
2026-06
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Content

Case ########-10

The recollections of Martin Blackwood. 

Recorded in Situ. 

Content warnings:

- Isolation
- Depression
- Anxiety
- Depersonalisation & self-disorder
- Self-hatred
- Financial distress
- Elderly neglect
- Emotional / Caregiver abuse (mentioned)
- Neurological impairment / Mental deterioration
- Instances of memory loss
- Funerals (mentioned)
- Perceived abandonment
- Persistent droning (SFX)

Thanks to this week's Patrons: MacKenzie Cummings, Elizabeth Boyer, cordsycords, Ace of Artemis, Amanda Dalton, Becky S Chapin, Lorec, Jessica Snyder, YungBrood, Sandra Vucenovic, Kimberly, John Biegel, Nemo Nemiroff, Paula Salkeld, Sophia Anderson, Rheine, William Wold, Milana Tatarenko, Haley Morris, elliot, Katie Barrowman, Bob Charlton, RinM, TeaReesa, Madison Mason, Charly Nygaard, Jurgen Leitner, crxcrvs, Andy Juell, Henry Tschudy, Eboni Daniels, Ms Natalie Catchpole, A_Wild_Sonne, Malediction, Alex, Dante Rowe, Katia, Eric Patterson and Lynn Coy, Harmony Mills, Ronnie Stewart  

Edited this week by Annie Fitch, Elizabeth Moffatt, Brock Winstead & Alexander J Newall

Written by Jonathan Sims and directed by Alexander J Newall

Produced by Lowri Ann Davies

Performances:

-  "Martin Blackwood" - Alexander J. Newall 

-  "The Archivist" - Jonathan Sims 

Sound effects this week by lwdickens, Sheyvan, altfuture, Anthousai, 13GPanska_Markova_Lucie, 190175, EricsSoundschmiede, mistorcaveman, Joljo, giddster, E0las, offthesky, lartti & previously credited artists via freesound.org.

Check out our merchandise at https://www.redbubble.com/people/rustyquill/collections/708982-the-magnus-archives-s1

You can subscribe to this podcast using your podcast software of choice, or by visiting www.rustyquill.com/subscribe

Please rate and review on your software of choice, it really helps us to spread the podcast to new listeners, so share the fear.

Join our community:

WEBSITE: rustyquill.com

FACEBOOK: facebook.com/therustyquill

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DISCORD: https://discord.gg/KckTv8y

EMAIL: mail@rustyquill.com

The Magnus Archives is a podcast distributed by Rusty Quill Ltd. and licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution Non-Commercial Sharealike 4.0 International Licence

Files

Previews only

Comments

Grace 'Gengar' Soria

I'm very jaded to most fears, but this episode just *guts* me. Alzheimer is my biggest fear. Having your soul die slowly inside of you. I have to pause this episode every 5 minutes or so just to look out the window and breath. My absolute favorite and the one I dread the most.

Mary M Spila

THIS ONE! Damn near broke me.

Rurrie

I'M NOT CRYING, YOU'RE CRYING

Rurrie

I wonder if the insinuation is that... with Peter Lukas out of the picture, Martin would be the defacto Avatar of the Lonely? Like... this place was *his*? If it was just a trap, the fear that wanted to feed on him, I don't think Jon would have offered to let him stay, right? That could have been Martin's house, if he wanted it.

Roro

I’m scared to listen

Kaz

oh no

cereal

three minutes in and i already had to switch to waterproof mascara geez

aubree

oh so we're just jumping straight in huh??? just right in huh????

Rebecca Dupont

Just seeing the content warnings and I am already terrified

Isabelle

I finished the ep and I’m just staring at a wall, feeling every emotion. Hands down, my favorite episode. The acting alone was incredible.... and the soundscaping... wow

Soph

you really are trying to kill me huh

ieatahottchip

shoutout to Alex for really fucking selling this performance

PeriPeriwinkle

I had to hide behind my hands for half the episode!!! this was Intense and I loved it

Arcturus

AND THE PODCAST OSCAR GOES TO ALEXANDER J NEWALL

JA Baldwin

Congratulations, Jon! You've set a new bar of insidiousness!

Maddie

The emotional goddamn rollercoaster this episode took me on is going to take me a week to recover from and then it'll all start over again

james evelyn

The DREAD in this episode is so real. What a different feeling. TMA crew said we don’t mess around and never have.

Flick

MAH-TIN

Finn Patrick

hooo boy the RELIEF I felt when jon showed up!!

LainyJP

This episode was incredible....I can't even put into words how much this moved me.

ScarletWitch

oop there it is. my heart. shattered into little pieces. on the ground. you've stepped all over it. look at it. SAD.

serenfire

what can I say except oof

Rene Hardigree

Alex, your acting was utterly superb during this. This episode broke me. Poor Martin. I really do think he isn't as free from the Lonely as he thinks

Gladiolus

Honestly extraordinary episode. My new favorite by far. Extraordinary voicework, extraordinary writing, extraordinary soundscaping, just everything is UGH so so so good i am in tears this was so good

Kit

AHHHHH this episode was so beyond amazing thank you so much

kogla

Ohh myy, it was soo goood! My heart broke to billion pieces, but still it was soo good! the soundscaping, the emotions , oh my, definitely one of my fav episodes!

Aydenburd

That's fine, I wasn't using my heart for anything else today

Fizzer

This hurts so much!

E C Marlowe

I didn't know my heart could break that many times in a row. Kudos to Jonny for amazing writing and to Alex for a beautiful performance.

Meg Shergold

This episode was so good!! I have short term memory loss and often forget what I’m saying while saying it so this definitely hit close to home. I guess that’s why I enjoyed this episode so much though, the subtle horror of forgetting is terrifying. Thank you guys for such a great episode!

danny

im going thru it alexa play nobody by mitski

GriffinsTreehouse

This felt like getting slapped in the face. I loved it.

Spicy Hot Take

This episode hurt me. Alex's voice work is so good that you can practically feel Martin's distress at being in the Lonely.

sasmus

Usually I don't like characters that have so much in common with me, like Martin here, with the Lonely and depression and just overall a big spiraling mess, if left alone, but I think this is the rare case of really rooting for the character that I can so strongly relate to. GO MARTIN

Ghost

Ow :c

Cassidy

Thank you for my TEARS

HoloXam

oh Beholding, we really in it now

Ghost Dandy Mi

Someone better get this man a good cow to hug or I SWEAR TO GOD

Eituoe

Even last week's fire sounds didn't get to me the way that ticking did, 10/10 acting as well

Zorya Dolgushkin

My god, this was incredibly cathartic to listen to, and with that comes the all heart wrenching pain of it. Such beautiful writing and voice acting. The element of fog is so poignant, that total disconnect from mind/body and soul, of all sense of identity and self worth being dissolved and the lack of articulation to convey what it is you are going through. It just hit home so hard, I was in tears throughout. And that declaration at the end, breaking out of the lonely: You didn't choose to be here. I am not lonely anymore, I am NOT lonely anymore, I want to have friends, no, I have friends. I am in love, I am in love and I will not forget that. So beautiful and powerful. Thank you so much for this.

Linnéa Sandberg

I just spent 25 minutes crying non-stop. One of the best episodes to date, but possibly one I couldn't handle listening to again.

Levi Curtis

:,,,) wonderful, wonderful depiction of issues like depression and memory loss. Seeing the way Martin is truly scared of it but also knows how to deal with it and fight against it was such a powerful thing to listen to as someone who has dealt with both. Thank you guys.

Deleady .

That hurt so good

Mark Sutton

Damn, just...damn. I'm going to need a bit to process this one. It felt a little too real, especially the last little bit of Martin's monologue. On a happier note, I'm guessing Tumblr is going to be flooded with tons of Martin and Martin/Jon fan art over the next 24-48 hours. This episode deserves it.

Deneb

Alex absolutely knocked this one out of the goddamn park. Made me want to curl up and go cold. Astonishing work

Lilmouse

That was incredible but also incredibly painful =,,,) thank you for the episode (also that acting damn!)

MuddyHippy

Wow guys, you've absolutely smashed it out of the park again. Alex's voice acting in this was especially brilliant. I've been on my own for 85 days and counting so I really felt for Martin in this one. Thank you for continuing to create such incredible content and keeping to your shedule despite such difficult times.

Aline Macambira

This episode hurt so good. The ending showed how strong Martin really is!

kodamaiser

rq would it KILL YOU to let them be happy for 5 MINUTES

LainyJP
>>38034523

Yes....it was so hard to listen to what mirrors a dissociative depressive episode for those of us that have had them. This will be one episode I don't think I can discuss much...but the fact that Martin found himself says so much about his strength. I cried, and then shed happy tears when he said "Not anymore". Alex's acting is incredible. Jonny's writing is out of this world.

RubyDian

This episode is AMAZING, wonderful job, I'm in absolute pain.

olliegarden

wow that was fucked up anyway top 10 jonmartin moments <3

Mary A.

Honestly one of the best episodes ever, but so, SO difficult to re-listen to...amazing. well done

Brian Taulbee

I can't believe it. They're fucking doing it. They're ending the series with its strongest season. Holy shit. So...WHERE are the goddamn recorders coming from?!? This all but confirmed it ain't The Eye, since it can already see everything now anyway.

Gerry St.Amour

This was an amazing episode guys! I cried the whole time!!! Thank you for my life!!! Alex you blew the acting out of the water bc yeah, every time it circled back i felt it like a punch to the stomach and started crying more!! thanks!!

SpookyArchivist

well this was incredibly painful, the best/worst lonely episode yet. I loved how martin was able to break out of it by thinking of jon in the end though. beautiful writing and voice acting all around, thank you

gojo fujoshi

this was the most painfully upsetting thing i've ever listened to, but it was so so so good. the bit right before jon finds martin is probably the most powerful the show has ever been. i love this. i hate this. alex j newall why must you make us all suffer every single week (please never stop doing it <3)

Milan Nigam

Great episode. I don't know if I'm the only one who had myself convinced it was the spiral tricking Martin (memory wipes and playing with perceptions) almost until the end.

carlee

Best episode of the season so far! honestly one of my favorite episodes of the show. Wow!

Chiara Iannelli

holy shit this was so good. the writing was so good. i feel like ive been demolished emotionally.

Liz Wooten

Martin’s speech at the end was so amazing!!! Alex’s voice acting in this episode was absolutely incredible. This episode made me feel emotionally raw in the best way

Vortex Eclipse

I feel so bad for Martin. But I'm endlessly still curious about the recorders. Maybe the eye uses them to help the archivist "see" things the eye wants him to?

Gilligan Mungus

As someone whose mother died from frontotemporal dementia and had a slow decline into memory loss five years ago, this episode just about killed me. Also since said aforementioned mother wasn’t generally the nicest parent, much like Mahtin’s mother, I’m feeling punched in the gut in the best way possible. The depression/fog is also incredible as everyone else has commented but it was the horror of Mahtin’s failing memory that really did it for me this episode. Jonny and Alex, please work together forever and ever. You two are truly a golden creative pair and the world is better for you sharing your collaborative work. Thank you.

AJ Budd

I made the mistake of listening to this at work. You'd think I would know better?? Truly crushing stuff in this ep. I love it and I am thankful but it hurts

Rahlly

Thanks for the hopefulness in this episode. I was tearing up over Martin's memory. One of my worst fears is losing myself like that. That and burning to death But hope came from Martin fighting back to himself. He rescued himself and stood up to his gear. He reminded himself that not only does he exist but who he was and he is loved.

Mantha Grant

Heart-achingly relatable. Really needed this one. Thank you. <3

Diamond Schulz

This is a new level of hurt that I didn't expect. This will take some time to process, but I do commend both Jonny and Alex for this special brand of pain. Well done.

Carolyn Thraves

Wow. Amazing writing and acting. I've made it this far through TMA without crying but this utterly broke me. Tears and shaking and jabs to the heart. Breathtaking episode.

martin kachow blackwood

the bit where he starts talking about being forgetful and always seeing his mother's face when he does something wrong... i rarely hear anyone talk about that aspect of things so candidly. how the shame of emotional abuse from an ill parent follows you forever. how nothing you do is ever enough. anyway, i ate six popeye's biscuits while listening to this. thank you for such a great ep 🕷🎻

Liz Wooten

rq really said gay rights with this episode

red

I LOVE MARTIN BLACKWOOD A NORMAL AMOUNT

Oltanya

That was amazing. It felt very much like the air was slowly being crushed out of my lungs. Shall have to relisten.

Katie Knight

Ya know, listening to this at 9 at night was probably a mistake, my husband is very confused at how viscerally I'm reacting to this, covered in goosebumps

oliver

relistened almost immediately also i feel seen

trinity

I started getting existential halfway through this and I’ve never been so scared at an episode before cheers

liz

This was a really amazing episode and a really satisfying pay off for several seasons of building up to really showing Martin's mental landscape and why he's been the type of person to talk to tape recorders like they're people all along.

Kaitlyn Meloche

I actually had to take a huge breath at the end of the episode because I realized that I had been holding it

Sameer MANGOCITRUS

this was a really great episode, loved it a lot! i think you should probably add something about anxiety attacks in the CW for when the episode releases publicly

Lex Adams

I may be the only one who feels that way and that’s totally fine if so! But I wonder if there could be an added cw for anxiety attacks because I wasn’t prepared based on the content warnings provided (even though I love that there are content warnings at all!) and going into it unprepared and basically experiencing what felt very similar to one of my own thirty minute panic attacks made me feel serious levels of anxiety.

Rapsodia

This episode was incredible. It hit harder for me than any other episode and I had to take a few minutes after to calm down, but the direction, the soundscape, the acting, everything about it has put it at the top of my list. Fantastic work.

zombie

Best episode you ever brought out! Phenomenal voice-acting, I'm really blown away!

thefarunlitunknown

Another week, another heartbreaking episode from Rusty Quill 😍

James Rule

Oh God... and I thought The Buried was the worst. I now have a new worst fear. Yay?

Heather MacKenzie

I was wrong. THIS is the most heartbreaking episode so far this season. Oh God, Martin. That just hurt.

elizabeth p.

This episode was amazing and intense. I haven’t been this disturbed/upset by an episode since Zombie. Echoing everyone else, i have to say that Alex knocked it out of the park with his performance

TJ Hoffer

Wow, this... this hit me so damn hard. The anxiety, depression, dissociation, self-loathing - all hit too close to home. But the ending, just before Jon gets there, when Martin is reassuring himself. That was really cathartic. This is seriously one of the best episodes, both writing and acting wise, as well as soundscape. Alex and Jonny just keep one-upping themselves and it's so brilliant.

Denise Schi

That was brutal... so unbelievable well done!

Robbie Lyons

I wonder if this was the Lucas manor. Now, there's nobody left to inherit. The house is empty and the family name forsaken.

ledgem

my heart broke multiple times. phenomenal work.

Kat

This episode is one of my personal favorites so far. I love it as much as it broke me.

Copernicus J Dogg

Wow, that was incredible. One of the best episodes of the series. Fantastic acting and writing, really sticks with you.

GugTheGoose

This is the episode that finally prompted me to go back and listen from the beginning again (I missed so much! Even stuff like Martin being locked in his flat for 2 weeks and nobody bothering to check on him...). I can't help feeling that the audience is being drawn towards investing in the characters just as a set up for emotional devastation though...