True Vorpal Bunny (Danmachi SI) Ch.16 (Patreon)

Chapter 16:

Iru put down the magic stones he had gathered to face the Ishtar Familia.

“Well, hello there. I didn’t know you had tamers in your Familia. Who’s the ventriloquist who voiced the toad, though?”

He saw some of the Amazons turn away from Phryne to hide their snickers, but the big bitch herself only looked at Iru.

He really didn’t know what to think about her armor. The helmet looked like an actual toad’s head, which was more attractive than the face below it. Did her blacksmith hate her just as much as everyone else and used the armor as a dig against the fattest Amazon on the planet?

“Oh, you’re a mouthy one. But I know it’s just because you are stunned by the sight of my beauty.”

She tried to wiggle her hips sensually, but it looked like a hippo having an itchy butt. Iru directed his gaze at the other Amazons before he hurled.

“Gods damn it. You’re a race of only women, how did you get an inbred freak? Her mere existence halves the attractiveness of Amazons everywhere. There are monsters more fuckable than she is, and they’re all man-eaters. Actually, is that why she got her alias? Is she an actual monster you managed to teach how to talk?”

Inwardly, Iru apologized to the Xenos. The sapient monsters were prettier than Phryne could ever be.

“Come on, Phryne. He’s a kid.” Aisha Belka tried to calm things down, proving that some Amazons did have standards.

However, this didn’t apply to the adventurer known as Androctonus, the Man-Eater.

“And I said I wanted a pet rabbit. Get lost, all of you. He is mine.”

The other Amazons hesitated but their Level 4 captain was violent and abusive even for an Amazon. So, in the end they backed off.

“Hehe. Those sluts know their place. Now, come on, pet. Just follow me and it won’t hurt too much.”

Was that how women felt when they were getting sexually harassed? Iru didn’t care for that feeling very much. But there was a bright side to this disgusting, very uncomfortable situation.

The Hume Bunny was still in a bad mood, and another punching bag was what he needed.

The Amazon approached, looming over Iru. She leered as she extended a hand that was bigger than his head. Iru did not know how she got so tall and wide, but it was ridiculous.

Just before she could touch him however, Iru moved.

“Collapse, Star Crown.”

Phryne blinked and Iru’s foot impacted her face and sent her flying.

Iru was Level 3 and Phryne was Level 4. One would have thought that the Amazon would have been able to react or that her bulk would have protected her from the lower-leveled adventurer.

However, Iru’s Skills and abnormal stats changed the equation quite a bit. With abilities in the SSS rank before both of his Level Ups, he had strength approaching the high end of Level 3. That strength was further boosted by his Skills.

Fjadrhamr augmented his stats the moment his feet were off the ground, and Mistilteinn added his Strength to his magic power. And since Star Crown’s gravity increased the impact of his blows, Iru’s small body could hit like a Level 4 specialized in Strength.

Iru, crackling with the energy of his enchantment magic landed back on the ground and rolled his neck.

Phryne picked herself up and unsheathed her axe.

“You little shit! You dare harm my beautiful face?! I will break your limbs and violate you before letting the monsters eat your broken corpse!”

The battle almost started when Aisha interfered and put herself between the both of them.

“Wait Phryne! I recognize him now! It’s the Collared Beast! The Record Holder of the Freya Familia!” 

She tried to make Phryne see reason. Ishtar may hate Freya, but the ruler of the Pleasure District certainly didn’t have the manpower to take down the strongest Familia of the city. 

Too bad Phryne Jamil wasn’t a very rational person.

“Who cares about the whore? Hell, I’m sure Ishtar will love seeing us humiliate the Freya Familia. Now, out of my way!”

Phryne, charged, intending to run Aisha over to get to her prey. 

Aisha felt a hand on her shoulder as Iru vaulted over her and kicked Phryne in the face once more.

Except this time, he didn’t stop his assault there. He rushed after the captain of the Ishtar Familia, and executed a hit and run combo.

Phryne could do nothing, completely caught off-guard by a foe that could move as if the air itself was a foothold.

One moment, she tried to counter with a swing of her axe, and the next a foot lodged itself on her spine.

She spun and lashed out, only to receive a knee to the face.

Iru was bare-handed, and yet the Amazon felt like he was hitting her with a hammer.

The group of Amazons watched as their captain was getting dismantled. While they had been ready to help Aisha restrain Phryne because they didn’t want a war with the Freya Familia, none of them was in a hurry to interfere now that it was clear that it was Phryne getting her ass kicked.

When you treated your teammates like shit, they didn’t care about you. Crazy thought, right?

Phryne’s defense became more and more animalistic as she failed to hit Iru while the Hume Bunny’s blows sent blasts of pain through her body despite her heavy armor.

Then, when foam started to form in her mouth, Iru kicked the back of her knee, making her stumble backward.

Iru somersaulted above the out of balance Amazon, and stomped her face in, smashing the back of her skull against the ground. 

He didn’t stop here. With Star Crown blaring to full force, he started dancing all over her body, the crunching of her bones and the metallic squealing of her armor being the only music he needed to get the rhythm going.

Some of the Ishtar Familia’s members were getting flashbacks from their homeland. Those born in Telskyura remembered Kali, the goddess who ruled the nation of Amazons. 

Even with their Arcanum sealed and limited to mortal bodies, a deity’s domain was so intrinsic to them that a smith god could create magic weapons and goddesses of beauty could charm people out of their senses.

For a goddess of death and destruction like Kali, it showed in her bloodthirstiness, and also the way she danced.

Even though the goddess was in the body of a small girl, that every Amazon received her Falna and therefore could fold the goddess in two, no one approached her during festivities, because the way Kali trampled the earth when she danced sent a shiver through the most courageous of warriors. It was a survival instinct that told that anyone under those feet would be stamped on until their flesh turned to pulp and their bones were crushed to dust.

And right now, for those who had witnessed Kali’s dance, they could only watch as the scene they all had imagined came to life: a body slowly being tenderized underfoot with the sound of a slaughtered pig as musical accompaniment.

“Shit! We need to stop him!” Aisha called out and the rest of her party followed her as she tried to make Iru stop.

As much as they didn’t like Phryne, she was still their captain and heaviest hitter. It would be a blow against the Familia to lose her, and Ishtar would take it out on them if she learned that they just let one of Freya’s kill her.

“Oi! What’s happening here?”

A voice cut through the battle.

Through the mist of the 10th Floor, a bunch from the Astraea Familia appeared.

Everyone froze.

Phryne twitched.

“Is that Iru and Androctonus?” Lyra asked.

“Should we intervene?" Kaguya mused.

“Eeeeh~.” Iska Bra, the Amazoness of the Astraea Familia made an unsure sound. “Jamil gives a bad name to Amazons. Really, if half the rumors are true, she must have targeted Iru, and him beating the shit out of her is only poetic justice.”

Maybe if Ryuu or Alise had been in the group, they would have stopped the fight and tried to make sure who was in the wrong in the situation for sure.

However, Iska personally kept her ear to the ground for info about Amazons’ misdeeds, and Phryne Jamil was a recurrent name, while Lyra and Kaguya were among the more cynical members of the justice-seeking Familia and could smell when someone was a piece of shit.

It also helped that from their previous interactions with the Hume Bunny, every member had a positive impression about the younger adventurer.

Iru sighed and hopped off the twitching sack of flesh below him.

“People should really learn to accept rejection, you know?” He said as he walked toward his bag of magic stones.

The squad of Amazons could have tried to lay the blame on Iru, but he was the one outnumbered here. They knew their reputation wasn’t the best, and once again, none of them liked Phryne.

So, Aisha, as the second in command of the Berbera, stepped forward.

“Yeah, sorry about our captain. She can’t control herself around cute boys. But I think she got punished enough for today, right?”

In the background, Phryne wheezed in agreement.

Kaguya scoffed.

“Yeah, sounds about right. Scram.”

The amazons picked up their overweight captain and left.

Though, before they got out of earshot, Iru’s lapine ears and the sensitive senses of the Astraea Familia’s Level 4 caught the smallest Amazon talking to her brethren.

“That was hot, though, right? I totally want some bunny babies when I grow up.”

“Shut up and walk, Lena.”

The Astraea Familia turned back toward Iru.

“Not a word. You know very well how Amazons are.”

Iska snickered.

“He isn’t wrong.”

Kaguya covered her smiling mouth with a sleeve.

“Casanova. We should be careful around this beast before he tries to sully us too.”

Lyra opened her mouth but Iru shut that down fast.

“How is it going with Finn? Maybe you should hurry up and seduce him before he becomes an old man with a shriveled dick. The age gap is already impressive as is.”

Iska and Kaguya winced.

Lyra started to sniff and her eyes grew misty.

“Waaaah! Finnnnn!” The Pallum cried, dropped to her knees and starred to hit the ground with her Level 3 strength.

Iru balked at the sudden emotional whiplash.

“What the hell?”

It was Kaguya who explained while Iska kneeled to rub Lyra’s back.

“Rumors have been going around that Blood Red from Soma Familia is the Braver’s illegitimate child.”

“They got the same eyeeees!” Lyra wailed. “Those beautiful crimson eyes full of passion!”

And just like that, Iru’s mood got better.