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Time passed and I waited. (Patreon)

Published:
2024-03-15 01:47:47
Imported:
2026-08
Tags:

Content

It could have been days or weeks; it didn't matter.  I had waited entire lifetimes for this moment.  What was a couple of weeks to an elf?

I was meditating just inside the dolmen when I heard the trees start rustling excitedly.  Jubilantly!  I had never heard the Voice of the Forest sound so excited!  "They approach!" the trees whispered.  "An elf is with them!" the trees murmured.  "Could it be the new Queen of Faerie?" they sang.

Excellent!  I chuckled as I heard footsteps.  They were here!  After waiting so long, I was finally going to be free!

"What is this place?" somebody asked nervously.  I didn't recognize that voice.  It had to be HER!!

I stood up, brushed the dust off of my jacket, and quickly composed myself.  I would need to put on a good show for this one, especially if I was going to persuade her to free me.  I should have been planning my routine instead of sitting around daydreaming since sending Venatrix and Barkingthwaite off!  Thankfully all the time I had spent talking to them worked wonders on helping me get my faculties back.  I felt sane, and fully in control.  I felt confident that I wouldn't act like a goofy idiot who didn't know how to talk to people.

"It's a gateway to his Lordship's domain," Barkingthwaite explained.

That sounded like my cue to make a dignified entrance worthy of an Emperor.

*CRACK!* A stone pelted me right between the eyes with the force of an arrow.  WHY IN FUMA'S NAME DID BARKINGTHWAITE DO THAT?  My thoughts became a jumbled mess again as my forehead throbbed and the light outside the dolmen blurred and bobbed.

Time was wasting!  Obviously the thrown stone was supposed to have been some sort of signal to summon me.  I had to do something before the moment was lost.  I ignored my spinning head and the ringing in my ears, and took a deep breath.

"WHO DISTURBS THE TRANQUILITY???" I bellowed in my most otherworldly and sepulchral tone.  Good so far.  Nobody could fail to be impressed by that.

"Your servants Pellia and Roger, my lord," Venatrix answered, "come to report the successful completion of their task."

Very nice delivery!  I would have to make sure to give the clever spider a bonus in her next loot bag.  I squinted through my watering eyes to see ... were they kneeling?  What a superb little touch!  Those crazy love-birds!  They'd actually done it!  This was the best day ever!  This was an unmistakable sign of wise leadership on my part.  I clearly had an eye for talent.  It wouldn't do to congratulate them too much, though.  Just a tiny taste would suffice.

"Ah good," I chuckled mysteriously.  "You'll have brought the woman, haven't you?"  FLAWLESS delivery!

"We have, my lord," Barkingthwaite replied.

All right, this was it.  Time for my entrance.  This was the crucial moment.  You only get one chance to make a first impression.  I couldn't blow it, not now.

I wiped my eyes one last time and stumbled forward, still feeling a little loopy but otherwise focused and in control.  I approached the entrance in a stately and shadowy manner, partly to make sure I kept my balance, and partly to enhance the impression of Mystery and Dignity which I was attempting to convey.

"Excellent," I beamed in my most Regal manner as I emerged into the light, enunciating every syllable as if the word tasted delicious on my tongue.

I turned my head slightly to regard Zandar for the first time.  Our very first face-to-face encounter!  I had to say something to gain her trust, something meaningful to let her know  that it would be safe to let her guard down around me.

"Yes, looking good," I purred as I looked her over very carefully.  The lowfolk clothes were styled oddly but they did indeed flatter her figure in a strange way.

She responded with a look which told me that, even with a probable concussion, my Wiles were still ultra-effective.  She was already smitten.  With only a few words she was like putty in my hands.  This was going great!

Before the situation could get awkward, it was time to reward the best agents/servants/minions I'd ever had (and get them out of here so I could woo my bride-to-be in private.)

"Arise my children, delight of my old age," I crooned magnanimously over the two kneeling lowfolk.

By Fuma, I was KILLING it with this "mysterious regal elf lord" shtick!  I would have to insist that Barkingthwaite include this whole exchange in the chronicle of my deeds which he was surely writing for posterity.

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Comments

Serge Skunk

Hmmmmm...I dunno...something about this smells funny. XD

Rick2tails

hey now thats offensive to say about some skunks there! ;)

Rick2tails

poor Adler doesnt need to be hit in the head to lower his faculties .hes already running a deficit of normalness to begin with.

Decadent Arsenic

From what I remember about this section in the comic, Adler comes off as kind of an asshole and the entire antics revolving around this stay in faerie got me to really start rooting for zandar as a result.

Katfeathers

Alas we are on arc for his young highness to put his foot in it; again. But also to let him out for re socializing.

Walter Reimer

And here to put it to a stop is Max Geldray!

tegerio

Just because Adler was a jerk to her does not magically make Zandar NOT a horrible person.

St. Veronika

Oh boy, the part that makes me want to bash his head in!

Rick2tails

they both have been utter assholes at times to be sure.

Decadent Arsenic

I did *start* with Zandar's Saga, so I'm aware of all the underhanded and asshole things she did. But the timing was key. People are fully capable of getting behind a villain or antihero if they are sympathetic enough. But also *enforcing tradition and separating a parent from their child as a result is more grave to me than murder. He did not have to do that.* but I also understand that that was a good way to make sure Zandar was ready to definitely not stay in Faerie anymore. Also *I'm of the opinion that getting to meet her daughter while she was a student at a magic academy she was hired on to without knowing that and so being tricked into just being herself the entire time she was a teacher doesn't count as "being in a position to bond with your child". Adler Young remains on my shit list as of the current run of Zandar's Saga.* But that's perfectly fine. This is all just my opinion, and I like your writing.

typeandkey

>Adler: Well, it's time to reward Roger and Pellia and send them on their way. They've done a very good job, so you decided to give them a big bonus. To make sure there isn't a repeat of them refusing to accept your blessed, elfly reward you put on what you imagine is a very stern, commanding face. >Adler: "Something for your trouble, as I'm sure the female was difficult." You say in a tone that you hope conveys that you mean business. "Please take it." >Roger and Pellia: You look at the reward offered to you in astonishment. This is enough to pay for every expedition you could imagine for years to come. >Adler: The looks on their faces confuse you. Surely this isn't much more than how much you paid them last time. The head-trauma haze keeps you from remembering very well. >Adler: The looks on their faces may signify that they are having second thoughts about accepting your generous and elfy offer. Quickly finalize it so they can't refuse! "Now a well deserved vacation." You try to say with an air of finality. "Go and enjoy each other's flesh, you crazy kids." There, that should leave no doubt that they don't have a choice. You are Emperor Adler, the tough but fair. >Roger and Pellia: The two of you lock eyes and give a love sick sigh, already wordlessly planning your next high-flying adventure. >Adler: You watch the two of them join hands and scamper away the way they had come. You can hear them giggling like giddy school children and breathlessly planning their next move. Something about a Wolf Mummy King? Well, that's their business. "Have fun!" You call out after them. "You'll know if I need you again." >Adler: "Precious." You say savoring the moment. This is the first time in a very long time that one of your plans actually worked as indented. Or worked at all. "Those two are just precious." The pulsing agony in your head hasn't gone away. Your ears simultaneously feel like they're burning and going numb. You hope you don't have a case of brain bleed. >Zandar: "Who are you?" >Adler: What? How could she not know who you are? You spent so much of your life trying to find her! There were crystal clear instructions! "Who am I? WHO AM I?? Am I not his MOST Lordship, a, the, Skunk Elf, Prince Randall? Well...? Am I not?" Seriously, she completely dropped the ball on her end. >Zandar: "I don't know!" You say defensively. >Adler: Everything you've gone through could have been avoided if this woman had just followed a few simple instructions. You can't help yourself, you're about to go on a tangent. Hopefully it will at least be cathartic. "Hmph. I know you, Zandar Skonk, my intended, my long absent, my TARDY!" Yeah, let her have it! You've had hundreds of years to ruminate on this. "Took your own sweet assed time getting here, huh my lady...? I had to FIND you, and that wasn't easy or simple, beloved... No no… Not so simple as the ONE very simple instruction which you UNFOLLOWED, my dear." Like, really, did she do it on purpose? "Did he speak an odd language, my pet? What part did you not understand?" The blood-pressure spiking rage coupled with your recent head trauma is not doing you any favors. You hope you aren't getting a nosebleed. >Zandar: "Who? What do you mean??" >Adler: "Great Auk. The old crow died for nothing." And you really liked that guy too. >Zandar: "The old crow died??" >Adler: He died for her benefit and she didn't even know?? "Not so you could arrive LATE!" You take a few deep breaths and calm your temper. While it did feel good to get that bitterness that been brewing inside you for 200+ years off your chest, you can see that you've upset her. Whatever... The past is in the past. Lets just get started with the whole reason you brought her here. "Please come inside, Zandar. I need questions to my answers."