“Meadow," (Patreon)

I began, diplomatically. If I was going to be Emperor, I might as well start practicing some Statecraft. "Your concerns over Burnside are understandable, and I commend you for having them. It means you’re taking your role as the living embodiment of Militant Seeliness seriously. But consider this: Keeping Burnside under my employ means that I have one of the most dangerous femmes in both worlds acting as my bodyguard, which deprives the Duchess of her services and prevents Burnside from running amok across the countryside. If you are really concerned about me staying on the Seelie path, then I have a proposition for you. A stable, functioning Empire would be better for everyone. It would give people hope, structure, income, and most importantly, law enforcement. This would help you significantly on your crusade of justice. The regular police could deal with regular criminals and you could focus your attention on the truly exceptional malefactors.” Like Dr. Owter Cesawonki, I thought, but refrained from actually mentioning him.

“Go on,” Meadow said, mildly intrigued.

“As the Mouse Queen," I continued, "you answer to no authority but Fuma, so I cannot offer you an official seat in my cabinet.”

“Why would you keep her in a cabinet?” Rebecca interrupted. "Does the palace really have one so big it has seats in it? I can't wait to see that!"

“A POLITICAL cabinet, Rebecca, dear,” I explained patiently. “Meadow, I would like to offer you an advisory role as Fuma’s Ambassador as well as an unofficial Minister of Justice and Seeliness. We can come up with a formal title later. If you accept my offer you would be able to keep a close eye on things to make sure I, and by extension the rest of the Empire, stay on a righteous path that would please the Lady. What do you say?”

“My position would be wholly unofficial?" Meadow pondered, rubbing her chin. "What would I be able to do if you or your administration go down a dangerous and unjust path?”

“You have been out there," I declared, "working for the betterment of Faerie for a long time now. You know the plight of the land and its people. I would be a fool not to listen to you as an advisor. Plus, as the Mouse Queen, you have the status of a living folk hero. If something egregious happens under my rule, you can express your disapproval. You can appeal directly to the people. You would be able to sway public opinion in a way that I could not ignore. If you accept, you will be able to fulfill your calling as the living arbiter of justice and help me complete my destiny.”

Meadow thought about it for a long moment.

Rebecca nervously crossed her fingers and whispered a quiet prayer.

“Very well." Meadow declared. "I accept. For now.”

"Hooray!" Rebecca clapped her hands while I basked in quiet satisfaction at my first successful Statecraft negotiation. This stuff wasn't so hard!

“Guh… Mornin’ Adler honey," Burnside snorted as she sat up from where she had been snoozing. "I was havin' so MANY good dreams about you. Hey, why’s little Miss Tin Cans still here?”

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