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"Of course not!" (Patreon)

Published:
2025-09-30 00:28:35
Imported:
2025-09
Tags:

Content

Thomson replied. "Obviously there is no kitchen in the Underworks, but there's a passage that leads from here to the cellars of the Royal Kitchens. I've been using it since . . . "

"The bodies ... the screaming ..." Suddenly Thomson froze up and began to weep.

"There there," Rebecca said soothingly as she took the casserole pan away from the distraught Floozy. "All of that is in the past. We're here to help, and specifically our lord Adler is here to set things right."

Rebecca handed the casserole to Meadow, and guided Thomson to a chair.

"This is surprisingly good," Meadow remarked as she tried a spoonful of the pumpkin-based concoction.

"Not bad," Burnside added as she dipped her finger in the pan and tasted it. "Matter of fact, it's better'n my Mammy used to make."

"Here, Adler honey," she continued, holding the pan out to me. "Try some."

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Comments

Rick2tails

Burnside ! that aint nohow ladylike to stick your fingers into the vittles ! XD

Walter Reimer

Adler: Suck it up, Buttercup; the others are looking to you to be brave and resolute as a ruler and descendant of Irenaeus should be. You take the spoon from Meadow and try a small bit. To your shock, it tastes pretty good. Thomson: Be comforted by Rebecca, and pleased that people like your cooking. Adler: Ask Burnside to go up to the kitchens and get some plates and cutlery (like forks or spoons). Burnside: Draw a knife and go. Meadow: Remark how Rebecca seems Seelie for a witch.

typeandkey

>Adler: You stare at the steaming pan of baked and seasoned pumpkin flesh in abject horror. Every terrifying experience in your entire life combined does not match even a tenth of the stomach-churning dread twisting knots in your gut at this very moment. What to do? Is there a way out of this? Should you play dead? Is it to late to go back to living in that stone circle in the woods? You’ll have to magickally immolate yourself, that’s the only way! >Burnside: “Well, come on, Adler-honey. You want some or not?” >Meadow: Through stuffed cheeks. “I’sh reallah goo’.” >Adler: Wait! Of course! In your panicked state you immediately went to the worst case scenario. You can simply say: No thank you. Crisis averted. >Thomson: You are starting to calm down. “I fantasized about this moment for so many years. The day Adler came to me to rescue me from this hell, I would make him my favorite dish. If he doesn’t eat it, it will completely emotionally destroy me.” >Rebecca: You give a beseeching look to Adler. >Adler: You mentally recite a silent prayer to Fuma: Why me? You gaze down at the orange and lightly browned mush as you take an offered spoon. You take a shuddering breath as you scoop a frighteningly generous helping and shakily steer the diabolical delicacy towards your mouth. You’d rather be staring down Bonsai that doing this, and that’s saying something. >Everyone: Time seems to slow down as you all watch Adler close his jaws around the spoon. >Adler: Horror, nightmares, unending suffering, this is what flashes through your mind as the pumpkin casserole makes contact with your taste-buds. It is a herculean effort, but you are able to steel yourself by reaching deep into the part of yourself that is the scion of Ireaneous and keep a straight face. You’re sure the dish is made well for what it is, but you just really, Really HATE pumpkin. You beat down your gap reflex as you swallow the vile lump of squash. You can feel it slither down your gullet and churn unwelcomely in your stomach acids. You force a smile and pat your soon to be sick belly. “Thank you, Thomson. It was very… Filling.” >Thomson: Your emotional crisis now ended, you immediately perk up. You hop out of your seat and rush around the table, spooning a towering helping of your beloved pumpkin casserole on every plate. “Wonderful! Now let’s eat the rest of it.” >Rebecca: “My lord, why are you crying?”