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I tried to soothe Thomson (Patreon)

Published:
2025-10-28 01:28:38
Imported:
2025-10
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and assure her that my companions and I would be fine. I didn't say that Mr. Calaveras’s claims were likely to be complete hogwash, despite thinking it. Thomson, however, was inconsolable.

"I'm afraid," she bawled as she clutched at me. "Very afraid! Why are you so determined to explore the dead city? I beg you, don't leave me alone. Mr. Calaveras tries to be good company, but I have heard all of his jokes a thousand times. Why did you even come if you were just going to leave me right away? It's cruel! If you hadn't come I would have been fine, but now that you're here I don’t think I can stand being alone again."

"I'll stay behind and keep Thomson company," Meadow volunteered. "I'm not interested in exploring the city. This damn costume doesn't cover much, and I don’t want gross bits of decaying dead things getting all in my fur."

"That's a good point," Burnside interjected. "Yall mind if I strip down to ma undies afore we go?"

"Maybe wait til we see what's there," Rebecca suggested.

"Well I don't wanna mess up my clothes, is all," Burnside explained.

"While that thing is busy doing what it does best," Meadow continued, with a glare at Burnside, "perhaps the Seelie aura of the Mouse Queen might help Thomson recover her mind a little. At the very least it should keep her calm."

"All right, I'm rarin to go," Burnside chuckled as she spun her knives in her hands. "I really hope all them thangs the skull feller said are real. Carvin' up a genuine eldritch abomination has been on ma bucket list for a while."

"Bucket!" Rebecca exclaimed. "That reminds me: Should we take supplies? Maybe whip up another pumpkin casserole to go, in case we need nourishment during our adventure?"

"I'm not planning to camp up there," I blurted, anxious to cut off that train of thought before it could go any farther. "If we really need something, we can just come back and get it. I know my way around Albric Tor pretty well. I grew up here, after all. Even full of horrors, I don't think it will have changed enough for me to get lost. Even if we do somehow get stranded, I can magick up what we need. Don't forget, you are traveling with the king of Faerie and the most bloodthirsty killer in two worlds! Plus you yourself are a talented young acolyte! We'll be fine."

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Comments

Rick2tails

I am all for Burnside to strip down naked.It sounds like a wonderful idea! also Id offer to console Ms Thomson especially if Meadow is there too to help >;)

Decadent Arsenic

And then they immediately find an avenue patrolled by a Dullahan

Walter Reimer

"We'll be fine." (Jeremy Clarkson voice): "How hard can it be?"

tegerio

Nothing dull about a Dullahan!

Eric Costello

I don’t think the Regalia is going to appreciate being called a “damn costume.”

Torchfire

Read "I tried to soo the Thomson" for a moment. And wondered "what's soo?", before taking a double take.

tegerio

Well maybe it should stop being so skimpy!

typeandkey

>Adler: You and the others make your way up to the city, using a route that was conveniently divulged to you by Thomson earlier, leaving behind the sound of Meadow regaling the loopy lawyer with tales of her life story. >Burnside: “How long do ya think until ol’ Tommy falls asleep?” >Meadow: “I heard that!” You call out. >Burnside: “Y'all were supposed to. Haw-haw!” >Rebecca: “Burnside!” You hiss at the manner-less raccoon. >Adler: “Let’s just keep moving.” You say in mild annoyance at Burnside’s antics. * * * >Adler: You push up a loose cobblestone acting as a secret entrance to the underworks. You help Rebecca and Burnside crawl out of the narrow entrance after you. The scene is grim. Skeletons laid out in ways that suggest extreme violence. Neighbors and families turned on each other. The macabre display what not entirely dissimilar to the battlefield outside, but the knowledge that these were not soldiers or mercenaries, but regular people trying to live their lives before the end came for them layers tragedy on top of the horror. A pit of forms in the bottom of your stomach as the all-to-familiar tidal wave of guilt washes over you. >Burnside: “Hoo-wee! These folks sure look like they had on netherhells of a hootenanny.” >Adler: “You just always know what to say, don’t you, Burnside?” You say with an exasperated sigh. You’re too used to her bad behavior to get mad over it. >Rebecca: “Oh dear…” You say in quiet horror. You found a skeleton of a mother draped over a pram. No, the plague-maddened mother wasn’t trying to save her child. >Adler: “Let’s move on.” You say sadly. “Our goal is to assess the damage. Let’s not spend anymore time here than we have to.” You usher Burnside and Rebecca down the road. >Adler: You all walk in silence; You and Rebecca weighed down by melancholy and loss, and Burnsside being quiet due to reverent awe at the carnage. You’re used to being surrounded by death by this point, but the surroundings of the city you grew up in being in this nightmarish state feels far more grim and oppressive. The deeper you go the darker and heavier the cloud becomes. >Burnside: You jump back from a window you were peering into. “Sweet merciful hogwash drownin’ in the nine netherhells and then some!!!” You bark out in shock. >Adler: “What??” >Rebecca: “What happened??” >Burnside: “I just done saw a face peerin’ right back at me!” >Adler: “It’s probably a ghost. Ghosts are a recognized phenomenon in Faerie. Enough tragedies happened here that there’s sure to be a few hauntings.” >Burnside: “I’m startin’ to have second thoughts about this. You can’t stab a ghost…” >Adler: “Well, yeah, we’ll probably see a few haunted spots, but I really doubt things are ass bad as Thomson and her skull-friend made them out to be.” >Rebecca: “My lord…” You say to Adler in a shaking voice as you point to a nearby building. >Adler: You slowly follow the direction of Rebecca’s finger until your eyes rest on a building. A building with pulsating blobs of necrotic flesh bulging out of the shattered windows. “What in Fuma’s name…” You suddenly jump as a pile of bones under your foot begins rattling. You stumble back as a mismatched bundle of bones scatters forward and begin assembling into some grotesque amalgamation. The newly formed hideous parody of a wingless bird skitters down an alley out of sight. >Adler: “Okay, I’ve seen enough, let’s leave.” You squeak out. >Burnside: “Seconded.” >Rebecca: “Yeah, let’s go!” >Adler: You all speedily retreat back the way you came, unfortunately for you, about halfway back to your starting point, your path is blocked by a headless figure clad in midnight-black armor. The headless nightmare sat mounted on, not a noble ant, but a massive, winged termite-king wreathed in black smoke. To everyone’s horror, the headless figure held up a severed head with fire ejecting from it’s eye sockets and mouth as it cackled madly. It was a dullahan! >Burnside: “Well, sh*t...”