Further editing for the 'remastered' chapters (Patreon)

So, I know I said the versions I posted were final, but then I got some beta readers and made a few adjustments based on suggestions. I'll be reposting the chapters once I'm completely satisfied with the end result and ready to lock it in. (Three beta readers have gone through it so far, which is *probably* enough, but I had several volunteers and I'm giving people a bit more time to make comments before locking it in for good)