Dynamis | Chapter 25 - Healing (Patreon)

Lilibelle clenched her teeth, tried not to let her frustrations get the best of her, while she strode beside Karl. Even though she’d woken him up in the dead of night, he seemed positively jubilant. He hadn’t acted this way when she’d delivered the news that Sean was awake, so she had to assume she had some small hand in why he was happy. After all, his mood seemed to improve significantly once she’d agreed to go along with him.

They stepped through the doors leading to the infirmary and approached a stringent white desk on their left. After a short conversation with the nurse on duty, the nurse handed them a pair of passes, which they promptly clipped to their shirts. Karl offered his thanks and took the hall immediately behind the nurse, past the desk. Lilibelle kept on his tail.

Hospitals had never been one of her favorite places to be. The air was always cold and biting, the food stale and processed, and the rooms eerily sterile and white. They were where family members and friends went to say their farewells. The echoes of souls long gone echoed against these halls, bringing back bitter memories of the nights she spent crying and sniffling. Most people considered dying in a hospital to be a stroke of good fortune. Few were lucky enough to be surrounded by their friends and families as they drew their last breath.

To Lilibelle, it felt like getting a sneak peek at the funeral.

“Looks like this is it,” Karl said as he stopped suddenly in front of a door. Lilibelle wasn’t watching where she was going. Her gaze had been glued to the floor. So when she bumped into him, her first reaction was to yell at him. Her mouth shut as quickly as it opened, however, and she spun toward the door, arms crossed under her bust. “Are you all right?”

“I told you I was fine, so stop asking,” she hissed. “Can we just get this over with?”

Karl sighed. “All right.”

Karl slid the door open to a dark room. Several machines beeped from behind a large bed whose top half had been raised at an angle. A dim ceiling light guided them to the side of the room opposite of the bed, where a pair of chairs and the other light switches lay. Lilibelle shut the sliding door behind her, causing the bed’s occupant to stir.

“Who’s there?” the man asked, his breath hitching. “I said I wanted to be alone!”

“Karl Donovan,” Karl said slowly as he walked around the bed to the other side, his shoes squeaking with the motion. “Is that you, Sean?”

“Karl?” He sighed, though Lilibelle wondered if it was more out of exhaustion than relief. “If I had known you were going to visit, then I”—he smacked his lips—“well, it doesn’t matter now. Pull up a chair.”

“Do you want the light on or off?” Lilibelle asked, her finger under the light switch.

“Keep it off, please.”

Karl pulled up one of the stools from under the cubby against the back wall and put it beside Sean’s bed before taking a seat. “How are you feeling?”

Lilibelle leaned against the wall beside the door while she watched the exchange.

Sean sat up and cupped his hands in his lap. “I’m okay.”

When he didn’t elaborate, Karl asked, “Did they say when you can leave?”

“Two days. They want to make sure the muscles have healed. Guess they don’t trust their patients to do as they’re told.” He laughed, but it sounded forced.

“Can’t say I blame them,” Karl said. “My mother never liked to stay in one place for long. She was a woman with a lot of energy.”

“Yeah?”

This was a waste of time. As noble as Karl’s efforts were, it wasn’t as if the three of them were friends or family members. It was obvious that not only was Sean not expecting company, he didn’t want it, either. And if Karl couldn’t figure that out, then he was an even bigger fool than she imagined.

Lilibelle worked her jaw while Karl continued to poke and prod him with small talk, most likely to keep Sean’s mind busy. A lot had happened while he was recovering, and he couldn’t imagine any of the news would be taken well. Assuming no one had told him yet.

“Has anyone been updating you on protocols?” Karl asked.

Sean heaved a long sigh. “No, and I don’t want to know.”

Karl wrung his hands as his gaze met the floor. “Understandably.”

It took everything she had not to roll her eyes, jump to her feet, and address the weight in the room. Sean had lost his partner, and conductors who lose their partners rarely recover from the shock. The intimate bond forged between conductors was addicting, and most experts agreed that a period of two weeks was required before the brain’s wavelengths returned to their normal levels. Sean had been hospitalized for almost a week now, so the thought of his partner had to weigh heavily upon his mind. But if Karl wasn’t going to say anything then neither was she.

“Did they say anything about Kalki?” Sean asked.

Lilibelle and Karl shared a frown. “No, I haven’t heard anything,” Karl said. “I imagine she’s probably dead by now.”

“If she isn’t, then I’d like to have a word with her.”

Karl shrugged his shoulders. “Do you want me to look into it?”

Sean nodded. “Please. No one I’ve talked to will give me authorization to speak with her.”

“If they won’t listen to you then I don’t see how we’ll fare any better,” Lilibelle finally said, crossing one leg in front of the other.

“I might surpass you in rank,” Sean said, “but I’m not Harmonic like you two are.”

Lilibelle scoffed. “Lot of good that status has done for me.”

“I agree with Lilibelle,” Karl said, shaking his head. “I’m not sure that’s going to do a whole lot of good for us. It hasn’t earned us any favors.”

“Well, I’m not doing any better over here, so it doesn’t hurt, right?” Sean insisted.

“... All right, we’ll try.”

Lilibelle raised one eyebrow. What is this ‘we’ shit he’s going on about? Don’t rope me into this.

“Thanks,” Sean said, the corners of his lips tucking into a small smile. “I don’t want to sound like a jerk, but I’d really like to get some sleep now.”

“Of course.” Karl rose to his feet and pushed the stool back to where he’d found it. He came back to Sean’s bedside and said, “I’m glad you’re healthy. Thanks for sticking it out with me. I wouldn’t be alive if not for you.”

Sean smirked. “The same could be said of you. For a rookie, you ain’t half bad. Keep it up and I’m sure you’ll grab Deadeye’s attention.” He glanced in Lilibelle’s direction, and she reciprocated with a glare. “You already have the attention of a few others, I’m sure.”

He better not be talking about me. He doesn’t know anything about me!

“We’ll see,” Karl said, smiling wryly. “I’ll get out of your hair and talk to someone about Kalki.”

“Thanks, Karl.” He turned to his side and adjusted the pillow under his head.

Karl carefully stepped around the bed and met Lilibelle at the door. He walked out first, and Lilibelle closed the door as she exited behind him. Once they were a good distance away, Karl stopped and turned his side toward her.

“Should I have not visited?” he asked. His voice was low, devoid of the usual spark she was accustomed to hearing. He kept his eyes level with her, but it was obvious he wasn’t looking at her.

“How should I know?” she said with a shrug. “I barely know him.”

“Right,” he said, nodding. “Well, thanks for giving me the heads up on his status. I’m going to follow up with Admiral Chovek and see if he won’t let Sean talk to Kalki.”

This idiot was really going to go directly to Chovek? “What? Why him?”

“Better to go directly to the source, right? The sooner I can talk to him the better.”

She frowned. “You can’t be serious. Right now? In the dead of night? When neither of us are on good terms with him? Are you trying to piss him off?”

“All I’m doing is asking a question. Nothing more. He should be awake anyway.”

Lilibelle sighed. “And if he isn’t? He’s not going to like that. It’s not worth waking him up for such a trivial reason.”

“It’s not trivial if it’s important to Sean.”

“You’re being an idiot,” Lilibelle snapped and rubbed her forehead. “If you’re stupid enough to pursue him directly, then at least wait until tomorrow. It won’t make any different if you ask him now or tomorrow.”

Karl seemed to chew on the words for a minute before a thin line settled on his lips. “This is obviously not important to you, so thank you for the input.”

“Stop!” Lilibelle hissed and balled her hands into fists at her sides. “You’re letting your emotions get the best of you again.” Why was this boy so stupid? “Did you not hear what I said?”

Karl’s lip twitched. “Don’t talk down to me like that. I’m sick of your attitude.”

“Hey, that makes two of us! What a pair we make!”

Karl scoffed and waved his hand toward her. “We were never a pair. Get some sleep.”

“Don’t walk away when I’m talking to you,” Lilibelle growled and closed the distance, grabbing the sleeve of his jacket.

“Let go of me,” he said slowly.

“No. You’re not going up there. You aren’t thinking straight.”

“Oh, and you’ve got your head on right, do you? The girl who can’t wait to get rid of everyone?” Karl snarled. Lilibelle started, her grip weakened. The look in his eyes scared her. “Don’t think I haven’t noticed. You go out of your way to avoid everyone.”

“That’s not true,” she said, her voice almost a whimper.

“Oh, then I suppose it’s just a coincidence that you’re always by yourself? I suppose it’s also a coincidence that Derrin, Millie, Daidari, and the rest of our class have offered the hand of friendship, only for you to bat it away?”

Her lip began to tremble. “That’s not true.”

“Then what is it? Because as far as I can see, everyone has tried their damndest to be your friend, but you don’t want a thing to do with them.” He shook her grip away. “We’re supposed to be a team, but you seem determined to do this alone.” He sighed.

Lilibelle wasn’t sure what to say. Karl wasn’t wrong. She’d done everything in her power to avoid making friends or building relationships. From what she understood, the DF was going to create an intimate link between her and her partner anyway, so what did it matter if they were friends or lovers? So long as their brainwaves were compatible, that was all that mattered, right?

Even then, there was still that little girl inside of her who wished to be released. She clawed between the bars of her cage, eyes soaked with tears, begging to be let outside again. There were friends to be made, allies to care for, hands to be held, memories to be forged. The death of her father and friends, the loss of her estate, the near complete collapse of her family and its history had almost brought her to her end.

Visiting Sean had shaken her resolve.

Lilibelle swallowed against the budding lump in her throat. “If you wait until tomorrow, then I’ll come with you.” She cursed the words in her head as soon as they came out. This was the exact brand of situation she was trying to avoid, and yet here she was, diving head first. “If there’s two of us then he’ll have a harder time saying no.”

“Are you sure?” Karl asked after a pause. “I don’t want to put your reputation at risk. Not after what happened last time.”

Lilibelle’s cheeks burned and her expression softened. “So, you were worried….”

“Of course I was.” He looked hurt by her statement.

She clenched her jaw and averted her gaze. “S-Stupid. I’m fine now. It’s nothing I couldn’t handle, it just… surprised me, that’s all.” Slowly, her gaze returned to Karl. A smile that didn’t reach his eyes curved his lips. “Like I keep saying, you don’t need to worry about me.”

He shrugged. “Can’t help it. When someone says not to worry, I usually worry.”

She rolled her eyes. “Unbelievable.”

A brief silence surrounded them. Lilibelle kept sneaking glances at Karl’s face while he nervously rubbed the back of his neck and shifted the weight between his legs.

At last, Karl answered, “All right, you win.”

Lilibelle breathed a sigh of relief. Wait a second, since when did I care what happened to him? “Good. When do you want to go talk to him?”

“How about after class?”

Lilibelle nodded. “That works fine for me.”

“Great.”

Awkwardly, they resumed their walk and stepped out of the infirmary. When the path branched, Karl called out to her. She spun around, the surge of energy she’d experienced under Karl’s scrutiny gone like it’d never been there.

“Thanks for stopping me,” he said. “You were right. I let my emotions get the better of me.” And this time, he smiled. Genuinely.

That familiar burn returned to her face. “D-Don’t say such embarrassing things! Sheesh, you’re such a crybaby.” Clicking her tongue, she bobbed one leg and said, “Sorry for losing my cool.”

“Hey, we both did.” He shrugged. “Next time, let’s get more sleep.”

Lilibelle nodded. “Well… good night.”

“Good night.”

Lilibelle spun around and briskly marched away opposite of Karl. She felt anger, embarrassment, frustration, regret, resentment, and wanted to grab him by the scruff of his shirt and pop him a good one in the face. But most of all, she felt something strange.

Happiness.