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(WARNING: Contains some extremely fakey gun violence.)

Howdy folks! I know that, after our release of Creating Rem Lezar, you would think that surely we've scraped the bottom of the barrel. But did you know the bottom had a basement? Yes, it's finelly time The Amazing Bulk got its due!

For years, people have been asking us to riff The Amazing Bulk. And for years, we have hidden under a bed hoping those people won’t find us.

Well, at last, it’s happened. The big purple grainy digital hand of the Bulk has smashed our hiding place. It’s infamous, it’s unbelievable - but decidedly NOT Incredible - it’s The Amazing Bulk!

How to describe this movie? First of all, it may not be a “movie.” It seems like it was assembled by pressing “random shuffle” on a piece of video software from the '90s, then pouring the results into a blender with a “superhero movie” button. The core premise may sound familiar: a scientist becomes a giant colorful monster after a lab accident, complicating his relationship with his girlfriend whose father is an Army general who wants him destroyed. And, of course, there is a maniacal supervillain with a vaguely European accent and a monocle. Sounds simple enough! The twist is, all of these characters inhabit some forgotten back corner of the uncanny valley. Their entire world, from the cars to the furniture to the monkeys to the leprechaun - yes, there is a leprechaun - looks to be made from low-resolution screensavers downloaded via Limewire twenty-five years ago. Even the chairs are fake. The chairs!

Get the riff right here, and use the coupon code AMAZING to take 5% off just for Traxians!

P.S. Earlier in the week we had a caption contest for Ultra Traxians. Congrats to Nicole Gross for this one:

"No shoot lady!! Grape Ape just want bodega Grape Nuts!"

Honorable mention goes to Tara Steiner for:

"Barney the gritty reboot. Super-dee-DIE!"

Another honorable mention from John Youker:

"Sesame Street really changed when it went to HBO."

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Comments

Greg Jones

Is Lewis Schoenbrun the Alan Smithee of James Nguyen movies?

Matthew Parmeter

This is like the asset flip games on Steam. Just purchase premade background and animations and a green screen and you're all set to make a "movie".

John Miles

This reminds me of playing the DOS game The Seventh Guest!

the antikaren

I read that the director financed this film himself so that he could retain full creative control. That's how much he believed in his vision... Seriously... It's on IMDB.

Suzi Eberhard

Aw, no more Vimeo video? These don't project to our Roku. We wanted to enjoy this monstrosity over dinner. For some reason unclear even to us.

Jeff H Crowther Jr

I don't think I have ever seen a movie with as low of a budget as this one...ever!

Cj Kyle

I'm trying to calculate how much booze I'll need for this one... Numbers are in. All of it.

Paul Wheeler

The first thing I thought was is this a new Tex Murphy game :)

Jason S Perry

The Tex Murphy line almost had me spit out my drink. I almost forgot Kevin was in that!