Guilty as Sin - ch 9 (Patreon)

And we're back!

I have to admit, we are starting to get into the stretch of chapters for these two that I've been very excited to write...

Also, yes, for the few people that have commented (and dm'd lol) about this - Guilty as Sin is the slowest S/C burn there is! Enjoy the ride :)

-------- Guilty as Sin ---------

Sutton stared down at her phone, mentally running through her checklist for the rest of the day. Right now, it was nearly eleven in the morning, which found her standing at the pick-up counter in the café next to the office to pick up lunch – veggie wraps for the both of them.

Charlotte had a call to take in twenty minutes, so technically she’d have a working lunch. But they’d be out of office for the rest of the afternoon, so having a quick lunch even if she’d have to on a phone-meeting during it was a necessity.

In the last few weeks, she felt so damn good about where everything was going, in terms of working with Charlotte. Well, working for Charlotte, she mentally corrected.

She supposed that was the only downside of becoming closer to Charlotte, was that she’d have these little mental slip-ups now, in which she thought of Charlotte sometimes as more of a peer-level than a boss-level. Not that she ever forgot Charlotte was her boss – that literally never happened – but… though she always was very cognizant that she was Charlotte’s assistant, sometimes it was easy to think of them as a team. Like, they were both working on the same mission.

In a way, she supposed they were. Charlotte’s mission was her mission.

Since spending that week in Charlotte’s apartment in D.C., Sutton really felt like that was the truth. Like they’d unlocked something and were working in tandem.

This was the experience she’d wanted from the very beginning. Getting an actual front-row seat to Charlotte’s mind.

She’d let Sutton in. She’d been so open and beautifully honest with Sutton – her big, brown eyes boring into Sutton’s with that edge of vulnerability that fiercely gripped her when she’d confessed that forming friendships was new territory for her.

Sutton had felt that vulnerability settle deep inside of her. She didn’t take it for granted that Charlotte was letting her in, and she would never make Charlotte regret it. Especially because… oddly, it seemed that Charlotte was even more nervous and uncertain when telling Sutton about her lack of friendships than she’d been when telling Sutton she was a lesbian?

It all just made Charlotte even more fascinating.

And she really did feel like it had enhanced the way they were able to work together. Like they really were a well-oiled machine. Even the way she’d been able to start taking notes for Charlotte and answering her correspondences had improved, because she felt like she knew Charlotte, now. She felt like she knew what aspects of meetings Charlotte was most interested in, knew the proper tone Charlotte would want to take with people in missives.

Even the simple things, like car rides or grabbing a coffee break, had changed. Now, they made actual conversation.

Certainly not the kind of conversation that she would make with, say, Regan – never – but more than work chatter or general pleasantries.

Sutton was even excited on days like today to be able to take this lunch pick up back to the office, so they could have a couple of minutes to discuss the rest of the afternoon. She –

“Well, well, well, what do we have here?” A voice came from behind her – from far too close behind her. So close, the little hairs on the back of her neck stood up as she felt his warm breath hit her skin.

Like some sort of internal alarm had been triggered, her stomach curled in disgust, souring any appetite that had potentially been forming for lunch.

It didn’t matter that it had been almost a decade since the fallout of everything that had happened between them, Kyle Summers grated on every nerve she had. Not only because of who he was, but because of how he reminded her of how stupid she’d been.

Sutton grit her teeth and resolutely trained her gaze forward, waiting for her name to be called. It should happen any second now, and she could grab her order and leave without giving Kyle a second glance.

Any second now. Hopefully.

“It’s great to see you, Sutton,” he continued, as if she’d given him a response in the first place. As if she’d invited him to go on. As if running into one another was in any way a positive experience. “As always, you’re looking lovely.”

As he spoke, she felt him reach up and stroke his hand lightly over her shoulder and down her arm, and she jerked away. So quickly, so suddenly, she accidentally bumped into the woman next to her.

Blushing, she managed a small, apologetic smile, murmuring, “Sorry.”

But she couldn’t regret it, because having his touch on her body made her feel viscerally sick to her stomach. So, in spite of the cramped space, she side-stepped as much as she could away from Kyle in the small space.

“Don’t touch me,” she hissed, her stomach turning in on itself.

Still, she refused to look at him. She wouldn’t give him that. Wouldn’t give him the satisfaction he’d undeniably take from her looking at his disgustingly handsome face.

Once upon a time, when she’d been far too naïve to know better, his face had given her butterflies. After everything – the pressuring into sex, the gaslighting, the cheating – well, he objectively might be attractive, but he made her feel ill.

What was he even doing here? The last she’d heard through the grapevine, despite his sculpted features and deceitful-yet-effective charisma and perfect pedigree, he’d been struggling to climb higher than lower-level positions in political offices in Connecticut.

She wouldn’t ask, though. She wouldn’t give him the satisfaction that she even knew that meager fact about him, which she’d learned against her will, anyway.

Apparently, she didn’t have to ask.

She felt him lean toward her as he spoke again, using that casually conversational tone. As if they were old friends, rather than what they actually were. “I’ve been running fundraising campaigns for Ted Wilkins.”

Sutton frowned immediately, before managing to school her face back to – what she hoped – was impassive. It wasn’t something she was good at, hiding her reactions, but she didn’t want to give Kyle anything. But, ugh. Ted Wilkins was a state senator – one of the longest running state senators in the history of New York – was, unfortunately, someone Charlotte had plans of working with.

It was part of her multi-pronged approach to enact policy, making as many connections at city, state, and federal levels. It was why her schedule was always packed, and something Sutton marveled at.

She could feel Kyle’s long, sighed exhale against the back of her neck, and her stomach rolled again. “I’ve heard you’ve been working for Charlotte Thompson. What an attractive team you two make. I’d wondered if I’d see you while we’re in the city.”

“Order for Sutton!”

She’d never been happier to hear her name in her entire life, and she hopped forward to grab the bag before the employee could even place it on the counter.

When she wheeled around to dart out of the shop, she found her path blocked. Unsurprisingly.

Having him standing right in front of her, blocking her path – forcing himself into her sphere – made a gamut of emotions rush through her. Anger, frustration, embarrassment, and that… that powerless feeling, like he had all of the control like he had back when he’d played so many mind games with her, laced through it all.

It made her feel sick, and it made her so fucking angry – at both herself and at him.

Biting it back, she jutted her jaw up and looked him in the eye for the first time. “Get out of my way.”

He didn’t move. “That’s the first thing you’re going to say to me?”

Sutton didn’t break the eye contact with him now that she’d made it, though she could see from her periphery that they’d started to attract notice from several of the other patrons.

“I have nothing else to say to you,” she evenly stated. “I have to get back to work.”

“I was trying to have a friendly conversation, given that we might see one another for work.” And still, he had that smarmy tone.

She set her jaw, narrowing her eyes up at him, and she had the flashes of everything from the past and how wrong it all was, in retrospect, and, “I’m honestly shocked you’re so interested in having a friendly conversation with me now. Because, as far as I’m aware, now that I’m twenty-six, I think I’m at least nine years older than your preferred type.”

The irritating smile on her mouth immediately dropped as he darted his eyes around – and Sutton noted with no small amount of satisfaction that the couple of women closest to them gave him a side-eye glance.

She didn’t wait for another response from him, already feeling her stomach so tied in heavy knots, as she pushed past everyone and fled the café.

It was a beautiful day – sunny and warm but the first time in weeks that the humidity wasn’t sickening. She’d enjoyed her brief walk to get lunch. And now, her walk back to the office was far too short.

She tried to push Kyle out of her thoughts, because he did not matter, and still… she felt so off-kilter. So off, that she couldn’t remember the last time she’d felt like this. And it had certainly never been while she’d been working for Charlotte.

But she just had to hand Charlotte her lunch, and then she could sit by herself and gather her thoughts. Maybe call Regan.

God, but it had been so long since she’d had to interact with Kyle. Even when she’d had to see him in passing at events over the years, he never pushed and prodded like that when surrounded by people he wanted to schmooze with. And definitely not when her father was present.

It made her feel so fucking stupid and so down on herself and why? Why had she ever gotten embroiled with him? Why did he have to be her first romantic and sexual experience? She’d spent… well, quite a lot of time in the last several years wondering about that. Wondering how differently she might feel about herself and about prospective partners, if she’d been in a different formative situation.

Instead, she was… who she was. Constantly second-guessing and unsure, and dating women hadn’t really made it better, had it?

If anything, she’d grown more unsure. Because with women… with women, Sutton needed to understand them more. She needed to try to put a better foot forward. She cared more, in a way.

And, yeah, the last place she needed to be going through the feelings that twisted her up inside was here at work.

She did her best to push those thoughts down and away, as she closed her eyes, took a deep breath, and braced herself, before reaching for the handle to Charlotte’s door.

Keeping her head ducked as she opened it and stepped in, she murmured, “I have lunch.”

“Oh, thank god,” Charlotte breathed out, warmly and effusively, as she stretched from behind her desk. “I’m starving. Don’t get me wrong, I did love the homemade parfait cup for breakfast.”

Sutton managed a small smile at that, forcing her lips to tug upward. Which she hated, because she was genuinely thrilled about that. She loved that Charlotte enjoyed the homemade breakfasts that she brought her. And she loved that they were at a point in their relationship where Charlotte would openly and honestly express that.

And yet, now wasn’t the time.

“Great. Um… here you go,” she reached out to place the bag on Charlotte’s desk, having taken out her own order and dropped it on her desk when she’d walked by.

Charlotte’s light, easy smile faded immediately into a concerned look. “Hold on. Is everything okay?”

… okay maybe this was a downside of them becoming closer. She couldn’t imagine the Charlotte of one month ago noticing if Sutton wasn’t feeling much pep in her step. Or, if she noticed, she likely would never have asked.

“I’m good,” she lied, and… ugh, no, she knew she couldn’t effectively fake that. “I’m fine,” she amended.

There, that was good. She was fine.

She would be fine, anyway. Nothing Kyle did was really all that bad; it just stirred some terrible memories and feelings up for her. Nothing she couldn’t push through.

Charlotte’s entirely too-perceptive eyes studied her closely, and she pursed her lips before she pushed herself up from her desk and walked around it, past Sutton, and over to the door. She closed it with a quiet snap, before strutting over to where Sutton stood.

Butterflies fluttered through her when Charlotte’s determined expression settled on her once again. She wasn’t often the object of Charlotte’s intensity like this.

And she certainly had never been the focus like this. As Charlotte stepped forward and reached out to gently but firmly put her hands on Sutton’s shoulders, urging her to sit in the chair behind her.

Feeling a little ridiculous, but also feeling good because it felt nice to be cared about like this – quietly, but adamantly – she obliged.

Charlotte leaned back to settle opposite Sutton against the edge of her desk, nodding decisively at her. “Okay, good. Now. Tell me what’s wrong.”

“It’s…” She heaved a sigh, reaching out to run her hand through her hair. “It’s really nothing. I promise.”

“Obviously it’s something,” Charlotte coaxed, arching a look down at her.

And, wow, yes. That was the look that Sutton was constantly amazed by. How Charlotte wasn’t angry or demanding, but just the expression on her face made the words bubble up in Sutton’s throat.

She tangled her fingers together in her lap, feeling so… ridiculous. She dropped her gaze from Charlotte’s, offering a shrug. “I just ran into someone that I used to know, down at the café. It’s – it’s fine. It doesn’t matter. He doesn’t matter.”

Oh no. Actually he might matter, she realized with a sickening twist in her stomach. She snapped her head up to lock eyes with Charlotte once more.

Kyle had said he was here working for Ted Wilkins, someone Charlotte was also currently trying to work in tandem with, and – fuck.

Sutton’s eyes widened in alarm. “I am so sorry,” she apologized, pre-emptively.

God, they’d only just gained this newfound footing, and she’d jeopardized it because she couldn’t just keep her mouth shut for another minute. She’d done so well ignoring him, not giving him any modicum of attention.

Charlotte’s eyebrows furrowed in obvious confusion. “Sutton, I’m going to need the explanation sooner rather than later – I’d much prefer to know whatever it is that you think you have to apologize for, than hear the apology. Who, exactly, did you run in to?”

Dropping her head into her hands, she let out a groan. Before she drew in a deep breath, and lifted her head up again to look Charlotte in the eye. If there might be a professional repercussion, then so be it. She’d face it.

“Kyle Summers,” she said, grimacing at the very name on her lips.

Charlotte mirrored that same grimace. “We’ve met, unfortunately.”

“… yeah. Um. We… dated,” she settled on using that term, even if it didn’t quite feel right, locking her fingers tightly together in her lap.

Charlotte reeled back in both surprise and obvious disdain. “You did? You did? When was this?” She tilted her head in thought. “You’ve been in the city since college, so… nearly eight years now? And he’s not based in Manhattan.”

“I was sixteen. He, uh, he had an internship in Boston over the summer. We met then, when my family attended a work event for my dad.”

It was very clear the gears in Charlotte’s mind were turning, before she stated, “If you were sixteen, that would have made him… twenty?”

Sutton very much wished she could go back in time and shake her younger self for being so naïve and foolish, getting drawn in to a situationship with a manipulative asshole. And then letting that go on for over a year.

“Yeah,” she confirmed, softly, casting her gaze down to her lap again. Not wanting Charlotte – who was so self-assured and so in-control, who knew exactly what she wanted and the sacrifices she would have to make to get it – to look at her while Sutton thought of her own mistakes. “I… it was so, so stupid. I just – I got caught up in him. He was my first… everything,” she let out a harsh, mirthless laugh. “After, I realized how much he’d used me and I,” she took in a long, deep breath. “I should have known better,” she finished, quietly in self-reprimand.

And she felt even more stupid telling this to Charlotte. Charlotte, who hadn’t outright stated that she believed love and romance were a waste of time, but it was pretty clear she felt that way. What she must think of Sutton –

“You were not stupid, darling,” Charlotte murmured, her voice soft and warm, as she moved to sit in the chair next to Sutton, reaching out and dropping a comforting hand to Sutton’s knee.

… oh. Oh.

She blinked rapidly as she stared down at Charlotte’s hand.

The warmth of her touch – not just her body temperature, but the softness – and… darling?

Sutton felt herself flush all over again, her tongue feeling too thick to form real words for several long beats.

Charlotte squeezed her knee again, and Sutton’s throat ran dry. “You were a teenager,” she continued, firmly. “And, if my gathering of context clues is correct, then I imagine you were even more of a sweet and trusting person than you are now. In a way that someone like Kyle,” disgust dripped from her tone. “Could sense about you, I’m sure.”

Sutton closed her eyes tightly. “Um. Yeah,” she affirmed, and that was what she’d ended up working through in the years post-Kyle. “Ridiculously trusting.”

Charlotte let out a low, rumbling sound, laden with heat and disapproval, and Sutton felt it pulse through her. She darted her gaze up to Charlotte’s, mouth dry.

“The reality is… so many people like Kyle exist around us,” she lifted her hand and moved her finger in a little circle, “Quite literally. Not just on the planet, but here. It’s why I can’t risk coming out. Why I’m so reluctant to let people in.” Insanely, there was no judgment in Charlotte’s tone or her expression, and Sutton… she didn’t know how to handle that.

Not that she believed, after knowing Charlotte for a couple of months, now, that Charlotte was in any way a mean or judgmental person, but. But for Sutton, this made it crystal clear: Charlotte truly did care about her, as a person. As a friend. And that realization started pushing through all of the other messiness inside of her. “

“Because people – especially in politics – are incredibly adept at putting on a show and getting what they want, only to turn around and have it all be deceit,” Charlotte finished, pursing her lips. Her eyebrows furrowed again, deeply, as she aimed a deadly serious look at Sutton. “And more than any of that? He had no business dating you while you were in high school and he wasn’t even a teenager anymore.”

She winced, and – yeah. Yes, she knew that now.

After a beat, Charlotte tilted her head and asked, “Why did you apologize? Why do you think that this might reflect badly on me?”

Ugh. Sutton tightly closed her eyes, grimacing as her stomach sank again. “Ah… because I said something to him that implied – in front of multiple people – exactly what you just pointed out? That his interest in talking to me now, in my twenties, is weird because he likes to be with girls that are far too young.”

She dug her teeth uncertainly into her bottom lip as she offered Charlotte the answer. Before Charlotte could say anything, she rushed forward to explain, “I just wasn’t thinking about the ramifications, and I should have been. I know that everything I say to someone that has any tie to you reflects on you, and he’s working with Ted Wilkins, so…”

She trailed off in confusion, as Charlotte’s expression didn’t resemble anything unhappy or reproachful. In fact, she could have sworn there was an expression of glee in her eyes? Yes, her full lips were definitely curling into one of those sly smiles – Sutton stared at it a few seconds too long.

“You said that to him? In public?”

“Um… yes?”

“I fucking love that,” Charlotte murmured, moving her hand to land on top of Sutton’s, now, squeezing in excitement.

She fucking loved that?!

Sutton gaped in surprise, the rush of the thrill through her at Charlotte’s approval and her swearing, and her squeezing Sutton’s hand hitting her all at once. “You do?” She had to push, to make sure Charlotte heard everything she’d said. “I could have besmirched your reputation with Wilkins. But… you’re okay with that?”

“In the name of you shaming Kyle Summers – rightfully so – in public? Yes, Sutton, I’m more than okay with that. I’m delighted by it. Having a good working relationship with Wilkins would be incredibly useful, but I’m not willing to prioritize working with him if he does take issue with you calling Kyle out, rather than taking an issue with Kyle’s behavior.”

“Oh,” she breathed, unable to stop her own mirroring smile tug at her lips in the face of Charlotte’s. “Okay. That’s – that’s great, then. I guess I rescind my apology?” She tentatively joked.

“As you should,” Charlotte nodded in approval.

She dropped her eyes down to where Charlotte’s hand still rested on hers, unable to look away. Charlotte’s hands were so… soft. It was strange to think about any part of Charlotte being this soft, because Sutton really did view her as such a force of nature.

She was a force of nature.

And she really was everything Sutton had imagined her to be. She’d already known that, on one level.

But to experience it like this, firsthand? Charlotte outright telling Sutton that she prioritized Sutton’s feelings regarding her past with Kyle over working with someone that might support him?

She didn’t just say that she cared or that she wanted to do the right thing; she did it.

Charlotte stared intently at her, and Sutton found herself unable to break eye contact, wondering what was on her mind.

Before Charlotte nodded decisively. “All right, let’s go.”

Blinking quickly, she tried to wrap her mind around what Charlotte was saying, and, “Huh? Go? Go where?”

“On a walk,” Charlotte replied simply, as she stood and brushed her hair back over her shoulders. “I find that a good, long walk is a great way to clear my head, especially after running into an unforeseen issue.” She arched Sutton a look. “Which you have clearly run into, today.”

Even with the explanation, Sutton found herself at a loss, staring up at Charlotte like an idiot. Was she being slow, or was this just a very strange behavior for Charlotte? She felt like – for once – she wasn’t the issue.

“Um,” she slowly shook her head, collecting her thoughts. “You have a meeting over the phone. In about two minutes. And then we have back-to-backs all afternoon.”

There was a patient amusement that utterly baffled Sutton as it slid over Charlotte’s face, tugging her lips up into a crooked smile. “Yes, Sutton, I am aware. Though you have proven yourself to be an invaluable assistant, I do still know my schedule.” She waved her hand, dismissively, “My lunch call was with Dean, and while we were planning on talking business, I can chat with him at any time. And we will be back in time to make our actually time sensitive meetings this afternoon.”

Sutton continued to stare up at Charlotte, the wheels turning in her mind to process. Charlotte was willingly blowing off her lunch meeting – and yes, Sutton was well-aware that it was with Dean, but still – because… Sutton had had a weird day.

It made a pleased flutter swoop through her stomach, quickly followed by embarrassment, and she pressed her hand to her forehead to physically will her thoughts to focus. “Charlotte, that’s – that’s really nice of you.”

So nice. Far too nice, because it made Sutton feel far too happy.

“But it’s really unnecessary. I mean,” she rolled her lips, feeling her cheeks heat, “I shouldn’t even have told you about Kyle, and it’s not that big of a deal. Not in the grand scheme of things. It’s a personal issue, and it shouldn’t have ever had any impact on your day.”

Frankly, the fact that it did made Sutton feel a little humiliated all over again. Yes, it had been toxic, horrible relationship that had – unfortunately – had a lasting impact on Sutton’s perceptions of herself and romantic relationships in general. But it had also been years ago, and she should be long over it.

Over it enough to not have to tell her fucking boss about it.

And, at once, that pleased feeling that had swept through her turned sour as she realized: she watched Charlotte fix things constantly. Obviously, right now, Sutton had become something Charlotte was taking on to fix.

Yeah, no. She rolled her shoulders back, firmly shaking her head. “I swear, this isn’t something you need to triage.”

Charlotte evenly met her gaze, and there was a steely resolve in them, but her voice was so coaxingly soft, “I’m not triaging you. I have no doubt that you can handle working the rest of the day. But we’re… friends,” her tone fell to something even softer, something surprisingly sweet. Especially for Charlotte. “I care about you.”

There was a measure of thoughtful surprise in Charlotte’s words, like she was really registering the fact that she did care about Sutton, as a person and not just her assistant.

She cleared her throat, determinedly narrowing her eyes down at Sutton. “Therefore, we are going to take a little walk. And we are going to chat. And you are going to walk into the afternoon with a much clearer head. Now, don’t make me use my serious boss voice to order you around,” she warned.

And though Sutton knew she was being playful, she couldn’t help but feel her stomach clench at the teasing warning in Charlotte’s tone and wonder – immediately – what that would entail. Charlotte’s serious boss voice telling her what to do? What… why would she even say that to Sutton?!

She knew she was blushing, and she desperately hoped Charlotte wasn’t paying too much attention to her.

“I–” She had to clear her throat, and she pointedly looked away, curtaining her face with her hair as she turned to grab her bag from the ground. “Yes, well. You are the boss.”

Okay, great; she’d managed her own modicum of playfulness back. Whew. Good.

Even though she and Charlotte were… friends? They were work friends.

That thought circled Sutton’s mind as they made their way outside, and she watched Charlotte slide her sunglasses on. They’d spent time together at work and at Charlotte’s apartment in D.C. but even that was because of work.

This was different. This was the first time they were putting work on the back-burner – in the middle of the work day! – to do something together.

As she kept pace with Charlotte, she couldn’t help but marvel at that.

“Not to harp on the subject that we’re on the walk to not think about,” Charlotte murmured, sending Sutton an arched eyebrow over her sunglasses. “But… why didn’t you tell your parents about Kyle? Given that he has a career, I presume you didn’t, anyway. I know you’re close to them, and I’m sure they’d have been incredibly displeased.”

“Oh, they would have been,” she immediately agreed, before taking a pause, rolling her lips in thought. “I think…” She started slowly, “I knew from the beginning, on some level, that it was a bad idea.” Ugh, it was hard to think about her young self like that, but it was true. On some level, through all of her naivety, she’d known. “That it wasn’t right. I didn’t know how terrible of a person he was,” she quickly added. “But that the situation wasn’t – ideal.”

“The person involved aside, I have to admit that I’m a little surprised by your willingness to pursue that relationship,” Charlotte’s tone was quiet and contemplative.

Sutton threw her a questioning look. “What do you mean?”

“I just mean…” A smile – sharp and devastatingly attractive flashed over Charlotte’s face – “You, Sutton Spencer, are such a good girl.”

Oh god. Her face fucking burned again, and… what? What? WHAT?

She pressed a hand to her stomach, feeling the insane butterflies that had erupted there. Obviously Charlotte hadn’t meant that in any way other than the factual meaning of the words, she thought, desperately latching onto that.

Charlotte continued, clearly entirely unaware of Sutton’s wildly disproportionate reaction to her words, “And you being interested in a relationship with someone that was – at that time in your life – inappropriately older, whose internships in the political world coincided with your family, thus making it a somewhat risky situation… is surprising to me.” She sent Sutton a reassuring look. “Not in a judgmental way, to be clear. Just – very interesting.”

Finally managing to get herself under control, Sutton took in what Charlotte was saying with a self-deprecating nod. “Uh… yeah.” She cleared her throat. “I get what you’re saying.”

Honestly, she understood Charlotte’s point, deeply. Despite the fact that she’d never really viewed it that way, herself, Charlotte was – unsurprisingly – absolutely correct.

“I guess it is… odd,” she allowed, tilting her head in thought. “Because I’ve never even had the slightest desire to rebel or go against my parents’ wishes. Other than moving to New York, I suppose.”

“They didn’t want you to move here?” Charlotte asked with undisguised curiosity.

An unstoppable huff of laughter escaped her. “Definitely not. They really didn’t like the idea of me moving so far away. I mean, all of my siblings that have gone to college went locally. None of them have settled outside of New England, even. I mean, my sister – well, she’s not really settled.”

“Ah, yes, the amateur MMA fighter. I find that incredibly fascinating, and yet… baffling.”

Amused and disturbed – as she always was when thinking about Alex’s career, she wrinkled her nose. “You and me, both. I’ll never understand why she wants to get beat up for a living, but…” She shrugged, having long accepted the differences between herself and Alex.

“So, why did you come to New York?” Charlotte asked, getting them back on track. “Again, given that you are so close to your family.”

Unsurprisingly, Charlotte had an uncanny ability to stay direct and on-topic.

Sutton worried at her bottom lip, wondering about how to vocalize the answer to that, herself. It was something that she’d never examined too closely, much like her drive to have been in a relationship with Kyle.

“I do love my family, and I would love to be able to see them more, or be closer to them,” she stated, honestly. “But – I guess it has a lot to do with what I’d said when I interviewed with you. My family is wonderful and I adore them, but they also leave huge shoes to fill. And while I never felt stifled by it or felt pressure from them, I just… wanted something on my own. And maybe that goes into your original question, about Kyle, too,” she shrugged, wondering how much she wanted to dig into that.

It seemed she’d truly given Charlotte something to latch onto, though, as she turned to look at her. “Do go on.”

“I think I just mean that – while I love my family and never want to disappoint them or embarrass them, there’s always been a part of me that wants to strike out on my own. To make my decisions, even if they are, um, ill-advised.”

She’d certainly known both Kyle and Joshua were ill-advised, and had dived into them, anyway. Maybe, subconsciously, had even narrowly focused on them because of that?

Which… was a realization she hadn’t been prepared for right now.

Not necessarily ready to share that aspect with Charlotte, she turned the tables and asked, “How come you relocated here? I mean, born and raised in Virginia, Yale-education–”

“And Columbia,” Charlotte teasingly added.

“Right,” she met Charlotte’s grin with her own, and felt that tingle at the base of her spine again.

It was undeniably attractive how truly intelligent Charlotte was. Sutton saw her in action constantly, and she was amazing at what she did and her pursuit of her ambitions. But purely on an objective level, Charlotte was brilliant.

Charlotte sighed, and Sutton flushed, inwardly chastising herself.

“In a lot of ways, it seemed like a foregone conclusion,” Charlotte answered, shaking her hair back in thought.

The sunlight caught on the long, brown strands, making them gleam, and for a long moment, Sutton was mesmerized.

“I knew from a very young age that I wasn’t going to stay in Virginia,” Charlotte continued, clearly – blessedly – unaware of Sutton’s far too unprofessional thoughts. “My grandmother and my parents weren’t ever there, and it seemed almost like it was a stepping stone into the next part of my life.”

Fascinated, Sutton stared at the side of Charlotte’s face. Even though she’d wanted to strike out away from her family and her home town, nothing about it had ever felt like a stepping stone to something bigger or like it wouldn’t have been enough if she’d had to stay there. Not like it sounded for Charlotte.

“New York seemed like the most logical conclusion. I knew I wanted to be somewhere bigger, somewhere that was far more of a social and cultural hub, somewhere I could make far more connections. It’s close enough to D.C. to make my career planning very simple, and during grad school, I’d started building in-roads here in local politics, so… here I am.”

“Here we are,” she added, unthinkingly, before wincing at herself.

Just because she was Charlotte’s assistant right now did not make them a we. Charlotte’s political journey was entirely her own; Sutton was just here for now. Hopefully serving as a value add at her side.

Before she could correct herself, Charlotte shot her a sly smile. “Yes, here we are. And I’m very grateful for it, darling.” With that, she reached down and lightly squeezed at Sutton’s wrist, reassuringly. Like she knew Sutton was chastising herself for making them a we.

Sutton very literally tripped over her own feet as she felt Charlotte’s light, easy touch on her wrist like a fucking brand even after she’d dropped the contact. She watched the breeze scoop up those long, dark waves as Charlotte strutted down the sidewalk like it was a runway, and –

Darling and good girl and her professional boss voice and the little touches, and oh, god.

Oh, no.

Nooo, no.

Horror struck through Sutton as her heart flip-flopped in her chest as she stared after Charlotte.

Apparently, she hadn’t outgrown her propensity for having crushes on wildly inappropriate people. Not at all.

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spoiler prevention

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