Living the Dream - Caroline and Hannah (Patreon)

Did I expect to be hit with the idea of this and the urge to write it? No. Does that change anything? Also no.

This doesn't replace the other drop that will come later this month. This is just clearly my brain deciding to hyperfixate on everything except writing and editing The Whole Truth lol

Living the Dream

Hannah hated weddings.

Well, no. Technically, she hated marriage.

But weddings led to marriage, so wasn’t it really just one and the same? And engagements led to weddings, so…

She didn’t even know why the hell she was doing this, she thought, irritated, for at least the tenth time since she’d started getting ready after seeing to it that Abbie got safely to her sleepover for the night.

She stared intently at herself in the mirror.

The woman looking back at her looked like Hannah. She had the same gray eyes she’d always had. The same long, blonde hair, which she’d styled perfectly in classic loose curls for the evening. She had the same features.

Physically, she was the same as she’d always been.

But what was wrong went so much deeper than looks.

Maybe her eyes looked the same, but she when she stared into her own gaze, she felt… almost dead inside. That was what it was.

Unless she was with Abbie – who wanted to spend increasingly less and less time with her as she was about to hit her teenage years – she felt like there was a vast nothingness that was so close to swallowing her whole, day in and day out.

She wondered if anyone else saw it, too. It wasn’t like she was trying very hard to hide it, anyway.

“What the hell is taking so long?” Michael’s voice was so muffled, as he wasn’t knocking on the bathroom door, but the bedroom door that this ensuite was attached to. “This is the only thing you’ve had to do all day!”

She’d long-since moved into this bedroom as her own – officially – and habitually locked him out of it. As long as Abbie wasn’t home, she could lock whatever doors she damn well pleased.

Closing her eyes tightly, she took a long, deep breath and flicked the light off, before going to the door and opening it.

“Why are we even going to this party?” She asked, brushing by him without a second glance, heading for the stairs.

“Because Granger’s wife organized it and he let me know in no uncertain terms that we are all  expected there to celebrate,” Michael muttered under his breath, using that mocking tone she absolutely detested when he said the word celebrate.

She knew this was the last thing he’d choose to do with his time, so this really shed some light for her. Gave her some clarity since he’d refused to delve into the why yesterday when he’d returned home from work and informed her in an obviously irate state that there was an engagement party, and they were going.

“And perhaps if you attend enough mandatory events, Granger will finally rally for you to become a full-equity partner,” Hannah muttered, sliding her purse over her shoulder, pretending not to see Michael’s glare in the mirror near the door.

Nothing in their marriage had ever been pretty – definitely not in a long enough time that she couldn’t even recall the last time she had any positive feeling toward her husband.

But it had been considerably worse for the last two years.

When Michael had very publicly been caught sleeping with his then-assistant at the company a couple of years ago, Hannah had tried to leave. She really had. She’d packed up for her and Abbie, gotten a small and shitty apartment with money she’d managed to squirrel away, gotten a job at a café.

Only, it seemed that everything in the universe conspired against her.

Because of his conduct at work, Michael hadn’t been fully elevated to an equitable partner at the firm, as had been expected. But Caroline Parker had.

And when his parents had caught wind of it all – their precious son tossing a grenade into the picture-perfect life he should have had – they’d stepped in to “fix” things, as they’d always done for him.

The only people on the planet that could somewhat exert any bit of control over Michael were his parents, given their hold over the Dalton family wealth. Not because he genuinely loved and respected them, but they held the keys to the kingdom that he already viewed as his own.

Typically, his parents were blinded to any of Michael’s wrongdoings. He’d always been able to weasel his way out of any consequences.

But him being denied a leap to full partner – and the very public reason why – had started to get around. Followed by his wife leaving him and trying to initiate a divorce with full custody of Michael’s daughter, aka their only grandchild?

Not a chance in hell.

No, the Daltons had hired the best attorney in the state to ensure that their name wouldn’t be dragged through the mud any further. An attorney who’d wiped the floor with the small-time lawyer Hannah had managed to get to take her on. They’d wiped that floor crystal clean with Hannah’s lawyer.

And they’d left Hannah’s fate crumpled in a pile on the middle of that floor.

She couldn’t provide for Abbie the way Michael could. Their apartment was small and dingy. And – Michael’s attorney’s ace in the hole – there was a time when Robyn had been babysitting Abbie and broken her leg. Somehow, they’d managed to twist the situation into painting Hannah into a neglectful light, unable to provide reliable, safe childcare. So busy trying to work, trying to desperately make ends meet, she barely even had time to be with her daughter.

Michael had been somewhat caged by his parents, who’d started keeping tabs on his comings and goings in ways they’d never done before. When he socialized, he had to put on the show that he did so well, the one where he acted so genuinely sorry for his actions.

And Hannah had been faced with a choice: continue with her dream of a divorce and bare minimum have equal joint custody with Michael, losing Abbie for at least half the time – though, from the way things had been going, she’d been reasonably sure that she’d have been lucky to get equal physical custody – or… go back to Michael. Publicly “reconcile” to save face. Play the forgiving, doting wife. Make it easy for people forget, the way people always forgave and forgot when it came to transgressions like Michael’s.

Which hadn’t really been a choice at all, had it?

As they arrived at the venue, she walked a step ahead of Michael. Trying to avoid any contact with him at all, because the very idea made her skin crawl.

She felt disgusted, even when his hand brushed against her lower back as they entered through the double doors.

“Don’t touch me,” she muttered through her frozen, plastic smile. She hadn’t even registered sliding it into place, that was how good she was at it now. She’d become a master in the last two years.

“I’m your husband,” he hissed back, smiling and nodding at one of the associates they passed.

She snorted, unable to hold it back as she reached for a glass of champagne from one of the circulating servers.

If Hannah had to be honest, she’d actually preferred her marriage in the years before all of this. Michael was no longer having affairs – and if he was, certainly not to the caliber and extent he had before. She missed those days, now.

Back then they hadn’t been happy, but things had definitely been more peaceful than they were now. Which was saying something.

But now that Michael’s parents checked in on him constantly – and would most definitely continue to do so until he was elevated to full partner status, thus getting everything “back on track” – he sulked and brooded and his levels of resentment and anger had reached just about untenable levels.

At least before, she’d been the only truly resentful one. Before, what did Michael have to resent? He’d gotten to have his cake and eat it, too. They’d barely ever talked at home and would fight a few times a month.

It was miserable and Hannah had hated it, and she’d hated him.

But now, it was even worse.

When Michael disappeared at this party, after she pointedly continued to ignore him, she was as thrilled as she could be.

And because she wouldn’t be going home to Abbie tonight, what did she care if she had a bit more to drink than she usually did?

That was really the extent of her thought process, as she finished her third glass of champagne within thirty minutes of arrival.

She had to admit: when Granger – more aptly, his wife – decided to throw a party, she really went all-out. Quality alcohol for sure.

She looked around the room, catching the eye of several people. She knew nearly everyone here, given the length of time Michael had been with the firm. And enough time had gone by that Michael’s transgressions weren’t the hottest piece of gossip anymore, which she was grateful for.

Hannah really didn’t want to talk to…well, just about anyone in this room.

But she also didn’t want their attention on her, either.

In fact, what she wanted most of the time these days, especially at functions like this, was to… float away. To be invisible.

With that in mind, she snagged another two flutes of champagne, before wandering back toward the elevator. She knew the building they were in; it was one of her favorite newer builds just outside of the city, with a lovely view of the river from a large balcony several floors up.

The night air was balmy as she stepped outside, finally feeling like she could take a breath.

Inside, it was cloying.

At her house, it was suffocating.

There were very few places she could really breathe at all these days.

Her deep inhale was cut short, her footsteps – a little clumsier than normal, given the whole… drinking… thing – stumbled to a stop when she realized she wasn’t alone out on the balcony.

Several feet in front of her was Caroline Parker.

She’d been leaning on the railing but had turned to face Hannah when she’d walked outside.

Hannah’s eyes widened slightly as she trailed them over Caroline.

She was used to Caroline’s beauty by now. Even though Hannah hadn’t drawn anything in a couple of years at this point, she always got the urge to whenever she saw Caroline. It was just – it was her face. The softness of her lips and the gentle slope of her nose combined with the sharpness of her jaw and her cheekbones, and then that little dimple…

What she was also used to was Caroline in her suits. So many colors – blacks, grays, reds, blues, light neutrals – she always simply popped in them. Like, right out from the crowd.

But tonight Caroline wasn’t wearing a suit.

She was wearing a dress, the likes of which Hannah had never seen despite having known Caroline for over a decade now.

Sleeveless, it clung to Caroline’s considerable bust, showing off her cleavage in a way that was designed to be eye-catching. Which… it did a great job of, because Hannah found her eyes glued right there for several long beats, in a way she didn’t really understand. A way that had never happened to her before. Probably the alcohol, but still.

When she managed to shake her head and move her damn gaze, she continued taking in the maximum effect of the dress. The curves of Caroline’s waist and her hips and her thighs were all glorified in the clinging black fabric.

Wow.

Then again, it made sense for Caroline to be the most stunning person here tonight. It was her engagement party, after all.

That thought slammed into Hannah, finally making her blink, and snap her eyes up to meet Caroline’s.

“I – sorry,” she managed. “I didn’t mean to…”

Was she interrupting? What was Caroline even doing up here? Wasn’t she aware that everyone downstairs was there for her?

Caroline shrugged one of her bare shoulders. “Hey, I don’t own the balcony.” She dipped her gaze to Hannah’s hands, where she was still holding both champagne flutes. “Is one of those for me?”

Hannah looked down at her own hands, blindly. She’d totally forgotten. “Ah. Well, no,” she admitted, glancing back up at Caroline, feeling a little self-conscious. “It, I mean, I didn’t know you were out here,” she pointed out.

Caroline’s dark eyes narrowed slightly. “Right,” she drawled, glancing over Hannah’s shoulder at the glass door, before locking her eyes back on her. “And… are you planning to meet someone out here?”

Her lips tugged into an incredulous frown. “What? No.”

Caroline’s gorgeous lips slid into a slow smile. “I see. You know, I love that you came prepared.”

Hannah felt a slight sting of embarrassment creep up the back of her neck a little more fiercely. She’d stumbled over her own feet in front of Caroline and was carrying two glasses of alcohol for herself… yeah, quite a good look.

“Here,” she offered quickly, reaching one of her hands out. “Now, it’s for you.”

“I’m only taking this from you because it makes me feel weird having you double-fisting drinks next to me on the balcony while I’m empty-handed,” Caroline cautioned, teasingly, reaching out and taking the offered glass.

Their fingers brushed ever-so-gently, and Hannah… it would be safe to say she relished in it.

Other than Abbie, she didn’t have much physical interaction these days. To the point that even something as simple as Caroline Parker’s fingers brushing over hers made her feel.

“So, what are you doing up here?” Caroline asked, studying her over the top of her champagne flute as she took a small sip.

Hannah scoffed, arching her a look. Sometimes, Hannah struggled to find the right words. But right now, she didn’t even need to try to find words.

Caroline knew.

Caroline knew very well.

She’d, after all, been the sole person who’d talked to Hannah directly after everything had happened with Michael. Everyone else at the firm would stare and whisper but wouldn’t ever say anything to her face.

After Hannah had ended up having to go back to Michael a couple of years ago, everyone smiled and acted totally normal. Except for Caroline.

She’d sought Hannah out, much like she had that fateful holiday party, and had directly asked, “Are you okay?”

She’d looked at Hannah with eyes so wide and imploring, like she really cared.

And Hannah had found herself incapable of lying to her. “No,” she’d answered, simply and succinctly. “But I do not want to talk about it.”

That much she’d been sure of.

She was out of options, and she didn’t want to talk anymore. She certainly hadn’t wanted to talk to Caroline Parker, with her concerned eyes, and her take-charge attitude. An attitude that Hannah, obviously, didn’t possess.

Caroline never made her feel like a failure, like she was weak.

But being around someone who was so amazingly self-possessed and successful and uplifting in the way Caroline was… it sometimes made Hannah feel like a failure, even though she knew Caroline didn’t want her to feel that way.

One of the only things that was better now than it had been before Michael’s downfall, though, was that Hannah wasn’t ever concerned about trying to keep any sort of peace with him.

It used to be at company events that she’d avoid Caroline, because she didn’t want to deal with the headache of Michael seeing them interact. He would absolutely go ballistic whenever he saw them talking in the days before she’d tried to leave him, designating her as fraternizing with the enemy.

Since then, she couldn’t give a flying fuck what Michael would prefer; Hannah had zero peace in their marriage as it was. If she wanted to talk to Caroline at a company function that she didn’t want to be at in the first place, she damn well would.

It was complicated, though.

She wouldn’t say she and Caroline were close. But she wouldn’t say they weren’t, either?

About as close as Hannah was with anyone, at this point, she supposed, given that Robyn had ended up moving to South Carolina to be closer to her family.

They saw one another every month or two, and Caroline always made a point to talk to her, she always sought Hannah out at events and parties and lunches.

And Hannah liked that.

It was just nice to feel like someone gave a damn about her. It was nicer to feel like Caroline, specifically, gave a damn.

Most of their conversations were – well, she couldn’t call their talks superficial. Not exactly.

They would chat about Abbie a lot, and she appreciated so deeply having someone who cared to listen to the Abbie updates she had. Caroline would regale her with some amusing anecdotes about work. Things that Michael would never share with her, even if he’d literally been in the same room as Caroline when they’d happened.

Admittedly, at this point, she wouldn’t care to listen to Michael tell her a story, so that was a lose-lose for both of them.

Caroline walked close enough to gently nudge her bare shoulder against Hannah’s, startling her back into the moment.

She blinked, not even having realized that she’d walked over to the balcony railing and was leaning against it, blankly facing the water.

“Didn’t think I’d be seeing you here tonight,” Caroline commented, sipping at her champagne.

Hannah glanced at Caroline out of the corner of her eyes. She wasn’t looking at Hannah, but also out at the view. Keeping her tone easy and conversational.

It was a trick, she’d learned, one that Caroline employed very well. The trick of seeming so casual and easy to talk to, that Hannah fell right into it.

She sighed, shrugging as she braced herself against the rail, leaning heavily against it. “Well, it was important to Michael, so…”

Caroline laughed, a sound so loud and unguarded and genuine, it vibrated through Hannah’s entire being, making her feel so much more alive.

“Yeah,” Caroline mused, reaching up to wipe a finger under her eye from laughing so hard. “Michael would never, ever miss a party thrown in my honor. I mean, we’re so close; it would be so strange if he wasn’t here.”

Hannah felt her own laughter bubbling up inside of her. It almost felt – rusty. Like real laughter shared with anyone other than Abbie wasn’t something her body was used to anymore. Definitely not with any regularity.

“He’s not going to miss any event where he can make a point of being present,” she corrected, her laughter now tinged with derision. “Michael… when he’s determined to do something, he can be very devoted.”

“And becoming a full partner is that something,” Caroline surmised.

Hannah hummed in affirmation. She hated that about him, though. She hated that he had the ability to focus in on something like that. Because if he hadn’t done that to her, back in their beginning, she was positive that none of this would have happened. She wouldn’t have been fooled by him, if he hadn’t dialed in on her, determined to have her.

With that, she tilted her head back and finished her champagne, then toyed lightly with the glass in her hands over the railing.

Caroline reached over, placing one of her hands over Hannah’s, and her warmth made Hannah still immediately.

She watched intently the slow slide of Caroline’s fingers over her own, her breath holding in her chest, as Caroline gently plucked the glass from her.

“Let me take this,” Caroline urged, softly but firmly. “In the event that something slips and this glass kills someone from this height. I’m not a criminal defense attorney.”

Hannah released the glass to Caroline, allowing her to take it. Even as she defended, “I have very dexterous fingers, I will have you know.”

She lifted her hand, slightly miscalculating the distance given her alcohol intake. Instead of her hand being equidistant between them, it was closer to Caroline’s face than she’d imagined, and she could feel Caroline’s warm breath against her fingertips.

Still, she wiggled them in front of Caroline. “I used to be an–” She cut herself off, rolling her eyes before the word artist could leave. She wasn’t a fucking artist; who did she think she was? “I used to draw.”

“Used to?” Caroline asked, lifting her eyebrow in interest.

At least, Hannah thought it was genuine interest. Maybe it was feigned, but she didn’t know. She usually had a decent barometer for that, at this point. After having been around all of the fake people the Dalton family associated with.

She didn’t get that feeling from Caroline, that fake feeling.

But, how would she know? If her marriage to Michael and her current circumstances reinforced anything to her day after day, it was that Hannah couldn’t really trust herself to make that kind of decision.

She only realized she was still holding her hand up when Caroline reached up and gently took it in hers, lowering it back down so it wasn’t between their faces anymore.

Caroline gave her hand a soft, warm squeeze before releasing her.

“You used to draw?” Caroline prompted her, tilting her head in question.

Hannah had forgotten what they’d been talking about, her head feeling pleasantly floaty. “Um. Yes. Used to. I used to draw. For most of my life, actually.”

“You were an architecture major in college, right?” Caroline asked, her dark eyes narrowing in thought.

For a beat, Hannah’s breath was stolen right from her lungs. Which was so stupid, and she knew it. It was just… she didn’t even remember sharing that with Caroline. She must have at some point, but it hadn’t been a big thing. But Caroline remembered.

“I… yes,” she murmured, gazing at Caroline as a gentle breeze blew over them, making some of Caroline’s soft, dark waves move like she was in a photoshoot.

But – but she didn’t want to talk about herself.

She didn’t want Caroline to focus on her, to give her those looks like she could see right to the depths of Hannah. She didn’t want Caroline to see into her soul. She didn’t want Caroline’s pity – though she was sure she had it – or anything like that. She didn’t want Caroline to think about how miserable Hannah was, she didn’t want Caroline thinking about her marriage to Michael. Because Hannah didn’t want to think about it.

No, very acutely at this moment, she just wanted to be a normal person. To have normal-person conversation.

She wanted to talk to Caroline like they were just two women, dressed up at an event who ran into one another on the balcony. She wanted to be someone who wasn’t stuck in the most soul-killing situation.

She just wanted to – to look at Caroline Parker’s perfectly shaped face and hear one of her stories, and pretend her life was not what it was.

But then Caroline lifted her hand when the wind blew again, tucking her hair behind her ear, and Hannah’s gaze zeroed in on the ring.

It hadn’t been there the last time she’d seen Caroline, about a month ago.

It was… nice. She supposed.

But it didn’t necessarily seem like Caroline. Which was a little ridiculous, she could admit even through the buzz she had going, because she didn’t really know what kind of jewelry Caroline liked. But the ring looked – maybe a little too… flashy?

Whatever it was, it made Hannah frown.

“What are you doing up here?” She asked, her voice a little more forceful than she’d intended.

This was one of the reasons she didn’t drink, though, because she’d never been great at holding her alcohol. Loose-lips, buzzing thoughts, lack of spatial awareness. All of Hannah’s hallmarks when drinking.

Caroline paused, ever-so-slightly, before she dropped her hand back down to her side.

But Hannah hadn’t missed it. Somehow, in her inebriated state, she hadn’t missed it.

“It’s your engagement party downstairs,” she reminded Caroline, unnecessarily. But now she wanted to know more.

In fact, she was so hungry to know more about why Caroline was out here, she didn’t think she could focus on anything else.

“Yeah…” Caroline trailed off, in a way that was so unlike her.

It raised red flags in the back of Hannah’s mind, setting off loud alarms with just that one word. Caroline had never sounded like that before. Hannah might not know her incredibly well, but she knew her well enough for a decade.

Caroline cleared her throat, though, shaking her head. “It’s nothing I need to bother you about.”

Her tone was back to normal, that assured I’ve got it handled tone. But Hannah was unconvinced.

And she was just drunk enough not to drop it.

“You aren’t bothering me.”

She found that she meant that. Which was interesting, because she hadn’t really felt the bandwidth to take on anyone else’s stress or problems in the last few years, with the exception of her daughter. It was all she could do to keep her head somewhat above water in her own life.

She took a step closer to Caroline – and there was the lack of spatial awareness, she only realized when she drew in a little too close. Close enough that their arms brushed, only leaving them with a few inches of space.

But she didn’t step back. Instead, she determinedly held Caroline’s gaze with her own.

“Caroline, you’re… I mean, you’re the only person at any of these events to talk to me like a real person. If I can do that for you, then – I want to,” she found herself saying.

And again, she was shocked by how much she meant it.

But she did.

She wanted Caroline to talk to her. About something real, something more than their typical conversations.

And she wanted Caroline to talk about Caroline, which was something – Hannah only realized in this moment, even with the alcohol flowing through her – Caroline was very skilled at not doing.

In fact, she knew very little about her.

She knew the obvious facts: Caroline was beautiful, and brilliant, and thoughtful. She knew Caroline, obviously, was a lesbian.

She’d known about Nicola, the woman Caroline had been in a relationship with for the last year. But she didn’t know much about her, other than that she existed.

Caroline’s eyes stayed locked on hers, her eyebrows furrowed, like she was debating what to say. Or if she would say anything.

Before she slowly shook her head, her lips ticking into a small smile. “How about this? If you ever want to talk, for real, why don’t you text me? We can get lunch or a drink or a coffee – whatever. Something that isn’t at or hosted by the firm.”

“Like friends,” Hannah murmured, tasting the word on her tongue.

Her gaze was laser-focused on that dimple next to Caroline’s mouth that appeared again as she tipped her lips into a sweet, indulgent grin. “Yeah.”

“But… we’re not friends,” she mused, quietly. Tracing her eyes back up Caroline’s face. Moving slowly.

For the first time in so long, she wished she had a pencil and paper.

It felt like some sort of fucking miracle breaking through, and it almost made her want to laugh. Or cry?

But it definitely made her need to keep staring.

“We kind of are,” Caroline said, reaching out to gently touch Hannah’s wrist. “I don’t not consider you a friend.”

Hannah scoffed.

And then was mortified to realize she’d started crying.

She didn’t know when the tears had hit her in the last few seconds, she really didn’t.

She wasn’t full-on sobbing, but – but tears had fallen over onto her cheeks, just a couple of them that now stung at her eyes.

It was the way Caroline was touching her, something warm and soft and the most comforting touch from anyone who wasn’t her daughter that she’d had in… in so long. The way Caroline looked at her, like she was really here. The way Caroline referred to her as a friend, even though they couldn’t be.

Not really.

Well, she supposed, Caroline was her friend. Sadly enough.

But no way was she Caroline’s. Someone like Caroline Parker? She had real friends. She was like – like a magnet.

The only good thing about the tears that spilled over was that Caroline didn’t drop her hand. She continued to touch Hannah’s arm, now rubbing up and down in soft movements that lulled her into a strangely hypnotic state. The touch made her shiver, and not just her arm. But her whole body.

“Hey, come here,” Caroline’s voice was so low, so soothing.

And Hannah’s eyes widened, then closed tightly, when she found Caroline pulling her into a hug.

When had she last been hugged? Again, by anyone who wasn’t Abbie?

Caroline might be shorter than she was, but she had Hannah in an embrace that defied their physical stature. She leaned heavily into Caroline, the champagne letting go of all of the typical inhibitions she had, all of the little mental barriers she kept up to hold herself together and at a distance.

It felt so fucking good to not have a distance from Caroline for once.

Caroline felt good.

She’d never been this close to her before. She’d never felt Caroline’s body against hers like this. Never felt Caroline’s curves pressed against her own. Never had her face buried in Caroline’s hair, breathing in her scent.

It made Hannah shiver again, her stomach tingling. Feeling so alive. More alive than she’d felt in a long, long time, just standing in this proximity.

Caroline’s hand rubbed up and down her spine, and Hannah subconsciously arched in even closer.

“Even if it’s not now, everything will be okay,” Caroline’s words were so low in her ear, her voice a little raspy.

Even though her tone was comforting, Hannah didn’t really feel comfort. But she sure as hell felt good.

“Hmm?” She breathed back, unsure of what Caroline was even talking about.

Oh, right, she remembered. She’d been crying because Caroline called her a friend, implying that she cared about Hannah. Ha. Embarrassing.

She was sure she’d be properly embarrassed tomorrow, when she thought about this.

Right now, she didn’t have it in her to care.

Caroline pulled back, and Hannah swore that everything inside of her screamed against it. She’d never felt such a visceral reaction to the end of a hug, but now that Caroline’s body wasn’t against hers anymore, she hated it. She felt… cold.

Her stomach didn’t stop tingling, though. And she placed, finally, what it was. This – this awareness.

Caroline wasn’t just attractive, she realized, her eyes widening as she stared down at her.

Caroline’s face tilted up at Hannah’s, her eyebrows arching up in obvious concern, her soft skin bathed in the moonlight out on the balcony…

Hannah was attracted to her.

Thank god Caroline had taken her champagne glass from her, because if it was still in her hands, she knew she’d have dropped it.

Caroline’s eyes searched hers, a considering frown on her lips.

Her full… soft-looking… lips…

“Seriously, Hannah. I want you to text me. Soon. You have my number, right?”

Hannah nodded, still unable to manage words. What could she possibly say to Caroline right now? What – what did it all mean?

Well, nothing. It meant nothing.

But, also, it did.

“Okay. I should…” Caroline trailed off, looking over to the doors leading inside, breathing out a sigh. She brought one of her hands up, toying with the engagement ring on her finger.

Hannah latched onto the movement, frowning again.

That movement was not the movement of someone who felt good about that ring.

Hannah would know; she recognized it from somewhere deep inside of her soul.

“You shouldn’t do it.” The words shot out of her before she could think about them, before she could stop them.

She snapped her mouth closed as soon as she spoke, her heart thumping faster, harder in her chest. What?!

Caroline’s eyes shot back to hers, wide at first, before narrowing. “What?”

“I–” She cut herself off, looking back down at Caroline’s hands. Still fiddling with that ring.

Hannah knew if she hadn’t had anything to drink, she wouldn’t be saying a damn word. She knew that without a single doubt.

But she’d had four glasses of champagne, and she felt those bubbles in her head, and her tongue felt a little looser, and Caroline was so achingly beautiful, and, “If you feel – if you don’t feel absolutely, one-hundred-percent, definitively certain about this, you shouldn’t get married. If you have any doubts, you shouldn’t go any farther than this – you shouldn’t.”

The passion thrummed through her veins, and she could hear it in her own voice. She wasn’t sure she’d ever sounded so serious, so intense when talking to Caroline.

Caroline’s mouth opened, then closed. Then opened again, “Hannah…”

But she didn’t say anything else.

And Hannah knew in that second, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that she was right.

She pushed forward, reaching out to drop her hand over Caroline’s. Feeling the bite of the slightly too flashy diamond on that ring digging into her palm.

“Trust me.” There was an edge of pleading in her voice, and she couldn’t change that. She wouldn’t if she could, not when it came to something as deathly serious as this was. “If there is any doubt in your mind, end it before it’s too late. Before it drags on. Trust me.”

The very idea of Caroline being stuck the way she was made her feel sick to her stomach. Even though she couldn’t fathom it, because Caroline… Caroline would never allow herself to be in the situation Hannah was in.

But even so.

The idea of Caroline going through the hurdles and the heartache – she shouldn’t. She was better than that.

If Nicola had done something to make Caroline had any doubts this early on? After they’d only just gotten engaged? Caroline deserved better than that.

“I – you know, I think we should both go back in,” Caroline stated, tilting her head toward the door. “Come on.”

Hannah shook her head, pressing her lips firmly together in a line. She wanted Caroline to look at her and see the cautionary tale; she wanted it so badly. If there was one good thing that could come of the mess her life was right now, maybe it would be in saving Caroline from making a mistake.

She needed for Caroline to do the right thing, and not marry the wrong person.

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