Shadow Money Wizard Gang Chapter 1 (Patreon)

"What is the solution to all of your problems?"

"Fireball." I said confidently. Very well trained from DND games and all of the anime/video games I had played in my previous life.

My sponsor smiled, and he said. "What if the fireball isn't strong enough? What if you're using the fireball with friends around the enemy as well?"

To which I said after a deep breath, and said deeply. "If they are my friends... They would understand why I needed to cast fireball when the paladin used all of his smites on the boss and had it stunned and defenseless."

And then I added sagely. "And if the problem doesn't go away from a fireball, you need to use a bigger one. And if that doesn't work. Then it's a skill issue on the user's part."

My sponsor nodded with a chuckle escaping him as he said in amusement. "That also works then."

He took a deep breath and added thoughtfully. "I was reincarnated into Harry Potter you know. Except it was a weird cultivation version that had a lot of nonsense going on in the background."

He shook his head, but I asked curiously. "So you are a man of magic right? Oh, and any interesting tales you could share? Was the Room of Requirement any different?"

To which my sponsor chuckled and said. "Yeah... I got a lot of stories I could share, but I will save those stories for when you get powerful enough to leave your home universe. We need something to share drinks over besides just comparing whose Rias Gremory has her ass cheek mole on which cheek."

The sheer confidence he had in that made me helplessly shrug as he took a breath and spoke. "Now. Back to you. You are going to a basically pure Percy Jackson universe without any universal taint besides the appearances of certain gods and such being different."

"No invaders from outsider eldritch universes, no DXD obviously, or Harry Potter events. Though in crossover worlds, Hecate or Thanatos tend to smash Voldyshort's soul into paste for his inevitable overstep in trying to bind them in some way."

I gave my sponsor a dull look as he looked sheepish, and I said flatly. "But... It's a pure Percy Jackson universe. But what? Am I getting thrown into like the Trojan War or something?"

My sponsor hurriedly shook his head saying firmly. "Hell no, it's against the Jakes thing to throw newbies into death traps... And those that do, get their asses beat by other Jake's jumping them hard."

"The universe is clear of... Outside influence, but it's the universe itself thats different. The gods rely more on human faith for fuel of their divinity. And monsters in turn feed off of human fear. So expect a lot of nonsense as you are going to be part of their game."

"Who am I going to be a demi-god of?" I asked rather bluntly as I got all to clearly what he was getting at.

My sponsor made a humming noise before he said. "I was thinking a son of Amaterasu, and a legacy of Hecate. So you could throw all the fireballs you wanted."

He shook his head and then said with a grin. "Nah, I am going to make you a son of Hecate, and a legacy of Hermes. So that your talent with your magic cheat will make sense."

I blinked at his mention of my cheat. And I asked curiously. "Wait so what exactly is my cheat then?"

To which my sponsor grinned and said knowingly. "Magic in its purest form. Wisdom and knowledge resulting in power. So as you become more powerful, more arcane knowledge from beyond your universe will be unlocked."

He then cleared his throat, and before I could react, he flicked an orb of glowing potential into me that I couldn't explain the visual appearance. 

The orb entered my chest, and my sponsor continued speaking. "All Jake's have the possibility of using whatever the fuck magic system they come across or just figure out if they want to spend the time doing so. But yours will come even easier with this talent of a cheat, especially as you will be unlocking Harry Potter magic from the get-go."

Then I saw him reach into a pitch black void, his arm sinking into the void with him humming before he pulled out what could only be a wand that was almost bone colored with some ridges running down it's familiar length.

"Here... Hahaha! A wand made out of Yew and a Phoenix Feather." My sponsor said as he tossed me what I realized was Voldemort's wand.

And even as my mind filled with a complete Hogwarts education and he flicked an orb of what I realized had to be my divinity that would make me a demi-god. I couldn't help but croak out.

"What the hell? Why not give me the Elder Wand or something?'

And my sponsor chuckled instead before he said with a grin. "Meh, I only have the one Elder Wand I got from going to another Harry Potter world that had a Fem-Voldemort... Yeah, she was fucking crazy, in life and in the sack haha!"

Then my vision went black as my blood began boiling even in my adjusted body, and I fell asleep to the sound of my sponsor saying sheepishly. "Hey dude... Just uh, be careful of Artemis and her hunters. They have a habit of bathing in the middle of the wilds and the Fates love to have poor bastards wander into them."

-

I awoke to the feeling of my wand strapped to my wrist as I went to rub my head with a groan of pain escaping me. "Ughhh did the fucking Knight Bus hit me in the head?" I muttered.

And in such a helpful response to my headache that was the result of a fuck load of magical knowledge being stuffed into my head.

A how-to guide to make the Knight Bus filled my mind, complete with its spatial warping features and semi-sentience that allowed it to dodge things as it drove at inside speeds.

All of which sparked another throb of pain in my head but as I did the wonderful guy trick of just... Turning off my brain and not thinking, I looked around to take in my surroundings.

"Where the fuck am I?" I asked in confusion as I realized my sponsor decided to just throw my ass into the middle of a park of some kind and on some thick grass.

But as I looked past the tree's surrounding me, I could see tall buildings in the near distance and then it hit me. 'Ah... Shit, I got thrown directly into New York, almost certainly Central Park in particular.' 

I gingerly held my wand that slipped out of a holster bound to my forearm, as I knew that New York was infamous for being crawling with monsters.

And with how I clearly knew about the gods and my lineage, especially. My 'scent' of a demi-god would be all too quickly be pulling monsters towards me.

'What spells would be good for monsters... Snapes, Sectumsempra? Or just sticking with the tried and true blasting curse?

I took a deep breath as I looked around again, only to find a backpack on the ground.

Looking into said backpack... Gave me three hundred dollars, a map to Camp Halfblood as apparently it was at the end of Long Island which meant I had a long way to go, especially with traffic.

Along with a large dagger made out of what was clearly Celestial Bronze, I had no idea how to use it in a fight was a small note that read.

[Ah yeah, I forgot to mention, but I did give your 'mother' memories of bearing you. Though I had to tweak things so she was more focused on another daughter she had soon after while she 'watched' you grow up relatively safely in a mundane way. SHE doesn't know your magic talent and thinks you inherited part of her other lesser domains. Goodluck dude!

PS- I can't believe I have to say thing... But don't fuck your mom, it never goes well for Jake's who reincarnate into PJ with a goddess parent.]

My face twitched at reading the final bit of the note.

And then with a flicker of annoyance, I flicked my wand at the note with the note crackling into flames before I dropped onto the ground and dragged my foot across it to make sure it was destroyed.

'I know I am part of the Greek Pantheon sorta... But cut me some slack.' I thought helplessly.

But at least with a map I knew where to go exactly as let's be honest... Being told that Camp Halfblood was on the coast of Long Island didn't exactly tell me much.

"I got three hundred bucks. I wonder how far a cab can take me?" I muttered thoughtfully as I actually wondered if I could even make it to Camp Halfblood to begin with.

But with a sigh, I stepped forward as it hit me that I didn't even have a modern cellphone with access to modern internet and its apps.

I woudn't be able to get a ride share or uber ride across a decent distance at all.

I began walking in the general direction of Camp Halfblood as I also realized something even important as I was walking. 'Wait... If I was put back in time to when Percy was just starting his adventures. That means that it's like 2005-2006! Even if I get a cellphone, I would be stuck with a shitty flip phone or somethin!'

My heart screamed as already, I was missing my constant background youtube music, and I shuddered at the thought of ACTUALLY getting and using a Nokia cosmic brick for a phone.

So with a dead sensation in my heart, I left Central Park and began walking through the streets of New York City.

-

I was a high-strung little gremlin by the time I managed to find something that made my face pinch. The bus service that went four times a day, every day to the northern edge of Long Island, which assuredly would end up close to Camp Halfblood.

'Fucking hell, where is my hairy goat-legged guide? I am not even asking for a big titty dryad or spirit. Just give me a Styr or something as I have no idea where I am going!' I all but screamed.

As I got off that bus after spending twenty bucks for the ticket, I was dropped off at the edge of a large stretch of forest parkland.

So with a sigh I muttered. "The camp better be here... If I have to camp in some dark forest I am going to just burn it down!"

With my backpack on my back, and my wand already in my hand. I walked into the darker forest as it took hours to get out of New York City.

And honestly, I was just pissed at this point that my sponsor didn't drop me off at the edge of Camp Halfblood to begin with. It's not like he was directly afraid of the Olympians, I am sure.

But as I entered the forest... I could feel myself being watched and that made it all to clear as to why he hadn't dropped me off in front of the camp.

This forest was for sure leading to the camp. Or maybe even a monster lair. I didn't know exactly, but I knew that if I made my way into camp, I would be watched in some way.

I kept walking until I heard a series of loud crackles of shattering sticks and leaves.

I whipped to the side only to see... A big titty goth!

I actually blinked as said big titty goth giggled and said with relish. "Aww, you adorable little fool. You didn't even have a Satyr guide? Tsk tsk well your scent is..."

The woman froze as she approached, and her mouth slightly opened... Showing jagged fangs that showed her inhuman nature.

She looked a bit torn for a second before she shrugged and said with a lighter smile. "Sorry... Little brother, but let me send you on your way to the Underworld. Tell the judges that Kathine sent you down, and maybe they will give you an easier time ufufu."

And then it hit me.

"You're an Empousa!" I said in realizations as her body shifted, with her fingers turning into bronze-tipped claws and her legs also turning into bronze constructs which had a bird-like shape.

"Aww so my little baby brother isn't completely ignorant then. Hmm, it's a pity, though, our patron doesn't seem to love you." She said with a cruel teasing to her voice as she approached.

All the while I could see how she was locked onto the bronze knife at my side and then... I whipped my wand at her and spoke with firm will and power, filling said words.

"Bombarda!" And from the wand came a pulse of purple energy that formed a bolt of purple energy that shot forward.

And in that split moment, as the purple bolt shot forward into the monster. I saw her look of utter confusion, so I, a son of Hecate, shot a bolt of magic at her for some reason.

The purple bolt of energy exploded violently, like the bomb of a spell it was.

The Empousa's form was blasted across the forest, spinning through the air with the force of the explosion that blasted her away.

'Aren't monsters supposed to break down into golden ashes when they are killed?' I thought in confusion.

But then... In slow motion, I watched the monster, the woman who had a chunk of her shoulder blasted off and lost an arm, was regrowing her limb, and her wounds.

"Ah shit..." I muttered as I realized I needed to use 'divinity' or the dagger I had been given to actually kill this monster truly.

"Wingardium Leviosa!" I spoke carefully as I tossed the dagger into the air... And then I flicked my wand towards the monster, who slowly got back up to her knees.

The dagger slammed home edge-first into the neck of the monster. Her form began breaking apart into golden motes of dust along with leaving a bronze-like finger on the ground.