Secret Novel Chapter 11: Rain and Fountains (Patreon)

Madeline panted hard as she laid flat on the dirt floor. She wasn’t sure how long she had been running, or even in which direction, but all she knew was that she couldn’t go any further. Her legs and lungs had given out on her, even as her mind screamed that the victor of the fight between the giant and the wolf could still be chasing her. But she couldn’t go any further as she stared up at the darkening sky.

How long would she have to wait for one of the creatures to track her down and finish their exhausted prey? Would they still be interested in her after a fight to the death with another monster? What if they both killed one another in the fight, and she ran all this way for nothing? Were either of those beasts sent out after her by the mages, for killing Marcus? Or were they just creatures that lived in the Maze? Though the wolf seemed to have a harness on, so didn’t that mean that it was tamed? Trained to come after her?

Questions, oh so many questions bounced around inside Madeline’s head, and not a single answer was found. Somehow, after what could have been minutes or hours, Madeline freed her mind of all the cascading questions and focused on one. What would she do if she came across another creature like those? She could run of course. But they will probably be able to outrun her… She had her knife. A knife that she had already killed with… A knife that would probably do absolutely nothing against a creature that could survive in the Maze…

Was there any chance of her actually surviving long enough to find home…?

Madeline could feel herself sinking into a pit of despair. There was nothing she could do to get out of this Maze. There was no way of finding home. There was no chance of her even surviving another couple of days. She would be killed by some monster, either sent by mages or just by random happenstance. It probably won’t be quick either. Knowing the mages they would make her suffer a slow painful death…

A dark thought came and Madeline couldn’t help but wonder if she should just get it over with… Just end it all here and stop suffering. Stop hoping for something that would never happen. From the day her father did dealings with the wrong person, it was set that she would die in this Maze one day. So why not make that day today…? She had her knife, and she had already killed someone with it. So why not kill one more person?

The young woman reached down to her belt, where she now kept her knife. The cold metal felt like it stung as she grabbed the handle and pulled it from its sheath. Lifting the knife above her, she gave the cold thing one last look. The beautiful patterns weaved through the blade, even all the way to the razor sharp edge. The edge that would bring an end to this miserable excuse for an existence. It had killed before, so it could do it one more time, before it was lost to the Maze with the rest of her belongings and body.

A cold drop of rain suddenly fell from the sky, and landed on Madeline’s cheek. Somehow, that single drop was enough to bring her out of the world of despair she had built in her mind. The world that told her the only thing to do was end it all. The first drop was then quickly followed by a second. Then a third and a four and a fifth. As the rain steadily grew, Madeline managed to forget about those dark thoughts and pulled herself off of the ground, not really thinking at all, just acting.

She would get cold and soaked in this rain, so the young woman pulled her cloak over herself and her pack, doing her best to keep dry. Hopefully this rain wouldn’t last long enough to soak through her cloak like it had done on the journey here. Hopefully being the key word. It was fall and the fall rains were never a joke in this part of the world.

Her aching legs screamed at her as she took a step forward. They didn’t want to move. They wanted to stay and rest, but that wasn’t an option for Madeline. In her nearly blank mind, Madeline knew that she had to keep moving. She had to keep going, for if she stopped again like that, she might not ever walk again. Only knowing that she wasn’t heading in the direction she came from, Madeline took one of the few paths of the Maze.

The rain slowly grew into a storm as she wandered the Maze. Wandering was the right word as she had no true sense of direction anymore. The dark clouds hid the direction of the sun, and the direction of her home. Still she kept going. There was no point in stopping. She just kept moving forward until night loomed over her.

Madeline had hoped that she might find an archway or another fountain with benches, so that she could lay under them to keep out of the rain. She had no luck though, and found herself wandering in near pitch darkness. She knew she needed to stop for the night. But the fear of stopping still held her. Still held that air of never getting back up again. Eventually, a misguided step, settled the argument for her as she fell into the corner of a path. Thankfully she didn’t hurt herself in the fall, but the hedge did scratch at her, and annoyingly so. Still, the choice was made. She would rest here for the night. Do her best to keep warm and dry under her cloak as her body took the rest it needed.

As the young woman got herself as comfortable as she really could in a place like the Maze, she realized she still had the second cloak. Taking it out and putting it over herself added just a little more protection. Not that she honestly felt it would do much. As she curled up, Madeline pulled out her knife once more and held it in her hand. Not as a means to an end any longer, but a precaution should anything come upon her in the night. Not that it would do much good, but she didn’t let herself dwell on that thought.

It was hard for Madeline to fall asleep. Both because of the cold rain, as well as the fear of what might be out in the Maze, lurking near her. Somehow though, she managed to close her eyes and drift off into a well needed sleep, and she even dreamed…

“What about Celeste?” Flora asked her as they sat around the kitchen table. Mom was out getting the food they would need for the week, and had left the pair of them alone. It was rare for the pair to have time together alone. Or at least alone at home. They were known to sneak out of work early some nights and climb to the top of the crumbling tower, but they could no longer do it as much as they had done in their childhood.

She shook her head at her sister’s suggestion. “I don’t know. Doesn’t sound right for me.” It wasn’t that it was a bad name. It was a pretty name, but it didn’t feel right. It didn’t spark that euphoric joy that she so rarely felt in this masculine body. “I don’t know if we’ll ever find anything,’ she said, defeated. They had been at this for weeks now. Trying out different names and seeing how they felt. Some had been nice, and sparked that little bit of joy, but they never felt like it was her.

“You’ll find something,” Flora said, rubbing her sister’s back. “And you’re allowed to take as much time as you need to find it.”

“Even if I do find a name, how many people will actually call me by it? Won’t they just calling me Edwi-”

“No! They won’t keep calling you something you're not. You’re not him, and if they can’t accept that, then they aren’t even worth talking to.”

Somehow her sister’s words made her feel a little better. Not that she actually believed them. It was more how much her sister truly cared about her. “Do you think Mom will come around?” She couldn’t help but ask, for as much as her sister cared, their mom always seemed distant about it.

“Of course she will! You’re her daughter. She loves you and cares about you. She might not understand, but one day she will. One day she’ll only ever see you as her daughter and nothing else.”

“Do you really think so?”

“I know so. Now, come on. What other names have you thought about?”

“I haven’t really thought of any new ones to be honest…”

Flora sighed and looked around the room, as if a name would suddenly appear out of thin air. Her eyes eventually landed on the book her sister was reading. “What’s the main character's name?”

“What?”

“The main character of your book. The one you’re always reading over and over and over again,”Flora exaggerated.

“Hey, I’ve only read it twice!”

“Still, what’s the character’s name?”

“It’s Madeline.” Flora looked at her expectantly. “What?”

“Do you like it?”

She scoffed. “Really? Isn't it strange to name yourself after a character in a book?”

“Why would it be strange?”

“I don’t know, it's just… I don’t know.”

“So say if I were to call you Madeline from now on, how would you feel about that?”

That little spark of joy washed over her at the thought of being called Madeline, but that didn’t mean anything. She had felt that before, and those names didn’t fit. “I… I don’t know.” She couldn’t help but blush slightly as she thought more about it.

“Well, Madeline,” Flora said, making her blush grow even more. “I think it’s a pretty name, and I can see that you like it. Don’t you, Madeline?”

She liked it. She liked it a lot. And hearing her sister call her by it made her feel giddy inside. Could… Could she be Madeline? “I… I do like it…”

“Would you like me to call you that from now on?”

“…yes. I think I would like that a lot.”

Madeline slowly woke to feeling cold and wet. Her cloaks, though thick, were starting to leak through with the nonstop rain. She couldn’t help but groan in annoyance. She didn’t want to go through another solid few days of being completely soaked through again. But what choice did she have? It was raining, and she wasn’t some mage who could control the weather. Not that she even knew if mages could do that. Regardless, the young woman stood back up and looked around. Of course she had no idea what direction she came from, but this was the Maze, that’s kind of the point. Picking a random direction, seeing as the sun was still hidden behind rain clouds, Madeline started again.

Much like last night, the young woman just took turns at random, hoping to come across something useful. It also wasn’t three turns till she found herself in another fountain square. A fountain square that had benches. If she had just kept going she would have had shelter under a bench. Shaking her head she looked around again, seeing what was new with this fountain, since none of the places she had come across ever looked similar. But this was odd. This fountain did look similar to the one where she left the other pack. Then she looked down… And saw said pack laying on the ground, exactly where she had left it before.

“Oh you have to be fucking kidding me!”