Secret Novel Chapter 36: Bloodmoon (Patreon)

Madeline sat in her chair, curled up in a blanket with the fire roaring and filling her home with heat in the cold winter. Her eyes were still puffy from the tears she had been shedding off and on all morning. One part of her transition she had not expected was how strong emotions would become. How much higher the highs could be and how devastatingly low the lows could be… Today was a day of all the highs and lows. Today was supposedly the day that the potions effects wore off and completed her transition. Today also happened to be her twenty-sixth birthday. She hadn’t really been keeping track of what day it was when she first got into the Maze, but after finding the Garden she did her best to keep track. It had been easier when she got the hedge home because there was a calendar. She had been so busy with magic and Victor that she forgot the day was coming up. To be fair, she didn’t celebrate it last year since her mom was so sick that taking care of her was far more pressing than a birthday. Today would be the day that it happened though. Today was the day for it. After all this time her secret birthday wish she had for years finally came true.

The witch groaned in pain as another wave of cramps wracked her lower belly. It hurt. It hurt far more than she had honestly expected it to. Even with all the stories from her friends and sister about how much it could pain them. Madeline also hadn’t expected the amount of blood there would be either. Maybe seeing the blood coming from there for the first time made it feel like there was a lot more than there really was. All that combined with emotions peaking with her new cycle made for an honestly horrible experience. Madeline loved it all. Tears began to fall again. As she thought about it, she couldn’t help but laugh as she cried and held her belly with a pillow she imbued with magical warmth.

“It happened… It actually happened!” she screamed out to the quiet winter world, where there was no one to hear. No one to share her biggest dream coming true with. No one to celebrate not only this but her birthday, as well. She was alone… Victor wasn’t here, nor had he been for four days now. Not that she wanted him here after their fight… No, she didn’t want him here at all. That stupid beyonder and his insistence that she would have to kill. That she would need to. She didn’t want him anywhere near her. She didn’t want him here to celebrate with her. Even if he might tell her something as simple as getting her blood moon wasn’t worth crying over when she had power far grander than that of being able to bear a child. Telling her that twenty-six was such a young and insignificant age…

He wouldn’t do that though, would he?

She wanted him here…

For as much as he could piss her off, make her regret the pact, and on at least one occasion make her thoughts wander at night when she enjoyed the comforts and pleasures of her own body, he was someone willing to spend time with her. Someone who seemed to enjoy spending time with her, even if it was more out of amusement than friendship. He was someone Madeline had a connection with when she was so very alone in this Maze.

The tears turned to sobs and the cramps seemed to hurt even more.

Why wasn’t he here? Why hadn’t he come back yet? Did she really fuck up with the names she had called him, even if she did truly feel she meant it in the moment? She didn’t want him to go forever. Would she be alone again? Have no one to talk to? Have no one to share moments with, no matter how small or stupid…?

“Are you still crying over our fight?” a deep voice suddenly called out from the doorway.

Madeline’s eyes and ears shot up at the sound. He was here! Victor stood, leaning in the doorway, back in his more ‘human’ form. Without even thinking, Madeline jumped out of her chair and almost ran to him. Almost. “No,” she said, wiping her face with a sleeve and trying to stop the tears from turning into tears of relief.

“Then what are you hysterically sobbing over?” the beyonder asked with his usual flair of a hand, but stopped his movements. He looked dead in her eyes with a true seriousness Madeline had rarely seen from him. So much that Madeline felt her heart skip a beat. “Are you bleeding?”

“I-I-what?” Madeline stammered out, wondering how he could tell that from just looking at her.

“You are bleeding. There’s blood. I can smell it.” Victor stepped further into the room, his face not yet shifting from the serious expression. There might have been concern in his expression as well. Madeline suddenly felt naked under his stare. He hadn’t looked at her with such studying intensity since they first met, and it made her feel strange in a way she hadn’t felt before. Then all of a sudden he was right in front of her. So close that her nose was filled with the scent of unworldly spices he always smelled of. She wondered why she suddenly noticed that, even though she had always smelt it from him. “Where are you bleeding?” His red and green eyes took in all of her at once.

“N-nowhere,” she stammered out, feeling her ears flatten against her head. His eyes locked on hers, and she was positive that her own slitted eye was as wide as his were.

“Yes you are, little witch. You are a horrible liar.” His hands went to grab at her wrists but she pulled away from him.

“It's nothing,” she lied again. It wasn’t nothing, but for as much as she had wished to tell him, she now felt embarrassed by it. One hand went to her belly as she stepped away from him. “Don’t worry about it—”

All of a sudden Madeline’s back was pressed against the bookshelf and Victor was on top of her. His face inches from hers. Her breath left her, and she told herself it was from the shove against the shelf. One of his hands pinned her shoulder, while another grabbed her hip. The hormones rushing inside her definitely weren’t going wild at all and making her look at how close his lips were. A brief glimpse of the kiss that sealed their pact flashed through her mind.

“Do not lie to me, Madeline.” His voice rumbled out and she felt it in her chest. The way he said her name made her insides clench, but she thought it was just a cramp. His face inched closer as he stared into her eyes. “Where did you hurt yourself?”

“What?” The question almost didn’t register in her mind filled with thoughts that she was being touched by someone again. A contact she had rarely had since coming into the Maze.

“Where did you hurt yourself, Madeline? Tell me.” His face moved down as he sniffed her, trying to find the source of the smell.

“I didn’t hurt myself.” She answered honestly, unsure of why he would ask such a question.

His eyes locked back with hers, now with confusion in them. “You didn’t?” She shook her head at him. “Why do I smell strange, but fresh and dried blood on you?”

“You can smell the difference between fresh and old blood?” Why was that the question that popped in her head. Of course she could smell the blood thanks to her nose, but it all just smelt the same. Though she had to admit this blood didn’t smell like normal blood.

“Why are you bleeding if you did not get hurt? Where are you bleeding?” Those mismatched eyes went back to wondering over her.

Madeline felt her face turn red in embarrassment. “I-I’m… It's my blood moon…” she admitted.

His hands still hadn’t left her as he titled his head to the side. “You are bleeding yourself for a bloodmoon?”

“No.” She looked at him with confusion of her own. Didn’t he understand? “It's my cycle.” The look in his mismatched eyes told her he didn’t understand. Didn’t he know what that was? “It's that time of the month.”

“I don’t understand what you're talking about. You bleed on a monthly cycle? Where? Why?” Finally the beyonder stepped away from her.

She looked at him, certain he must be playing a trick on her. He really didn’t understand? “Do beyonders not have a bloodmoon?”

“Our moons are always red.” He answered, still confused.

“No I mean… Do the women of your kind not get a bloodmoon?”

“No, I have no idea what you mean.”

She looked at him with wide eyes and wondered how she should explain this to him. “Well… Humans with what I have get what we call a bloodmoon once a month for about a week. We…” This was so embarrassing. Why had she wanted to tell him this before? “We bleed from our… Down there.”

“You bleed out of your vagina?” He looked at her with horror. “What? Why?”

The look on his face didn’t make her feel very good. “It means we are able to have children.”

“Oh.” He looked at her with wide eyes in realization. “Oh. That is big for you,” he said with a little daze. “Still sounds a little strange and disturbing that you bleed from there.”

“Yeah, and it hurts like a bitch.”

“It even hurts?” He looked even more concerned now.

She nodded. “But…” She didn’t look him in the eyes. “It’s been my biggest wish for years,” she couldn’t help but shed a few tears. “I never thought it could ever come true.” She hugged her stomach. “But it did.” She looked back up at him crying while smiling. “And, and…” the smile turned into a frown. “It happened on my birthday.” She was almost sobbing now. “I always made a stupid wish to the gods on my birthday to become a woman and to be able to have a child the way I always felt I should. I made it every year since I realized who I am. It was just a stupid dream that could never happen. And it did!” she was shaking now. “It happened on my birthday of all days. I forgot it was my birthday, too.” She saw there was shame on Victor's face. Shame that he had been disgusted by something that meant so much to her. “It’s my birthday and I have no family… No family to celebrate with. No family to share my biggest wish with. I’m alone. I’m all alone…”

Her sobbing tears blinded her now. It hurt. Everything hurt. She was so alone. She felt her knees give out as she went to sob on the floor, but Victor caught her. He caught her and held her to his chest. She cried even harder now. His arms wrapped around her as she sobbed like a child. She clung to him like her life depended on it. He didn’t say anything as he let her cry it out.

Madeline didn’t know how long it took before the sobs and tears began to quiet down, but they did eventually. She also realized just how much she was leaning into Victor. He was really supporting all of her and it felt relieving. It felt good to lean on someone again. To be hugged again. She didn’t want to pull away.

“Feeling better now?” he asked eventually.

She could feel his chest rumble with his voice. Taking that as a cue to pull away, she did even if she didn’t want to. She wiped at her tear laden face and could see how wet the silks on his chest were. “I’m sorry.”

“There’s no need to be sorry, little witch.” He looked at her with a gentle smile, not caring about his silks. “So birthdays are times for humans to spend with their family?” He asked gently, curious but afraid to trigger her.

“Yeah,” she said with a nod. “We celebrate with each other and give gifts to whoever's birthday it is.” She clutched her stomach at another cramp. “Is it different for you?”

Victor nodded. “Since our lives are practically unending, birthdays aren’t that important. Like I said before, I know I’m probably over a millenia old, but I couldn’t give you an exact age. I could probably figure it out if I wanted to. If anything we might take the time to be alone and reflect.”

“That is different.”

“Maybe, but I will admit I like the way you do it more,” he said with a smile. “Beyonders always love an excuse to get the family together.”

“It’s nice,” Madeline said thinking of the years with her family when they were whole.

There was a brief pause before anyone spoke again. “Might I be honest with you?” He asked, which was strange since if he had something to say he just said it without fear. She gave him a nod. He took a deep breath before speaking. “I understand how important this bloodmoon is for you and I do not want to take away from that. That being said, is there something that can be done about the blood? It is very unsettling and upsetting to smell blood on you.”

Madeline almost got angry with him, but then realized that he really was afraid to upset her. It was also clear that the smell was very upsetting for him. She even had to admit that she could even constantly smell the blood. Though that had been affirming to her to start out with, the scent wasn’t pleasant, and she could understand where he was coming from. “Maybe. I’m sure there’s probably something in one of these books that— Actually I might already have something.” The thought crossed her mind that when she first got magic she had made a bunch of potions. Many of them useful, but most of them served no real need for her. Maybe she made one that could help her now.

With her slightly shaking legs, Madeline led Victor into the kitchen. She went to one of the cabinets that housed her potions and started to go through them. Thankfully she labeled all of them, and also, thankfully, Eda had left her an entire box full of small little labels to attach to the bottles. Eventually she came across exactly what she was looking for. “Here,” she said, pulling out a bottle. “This should stop the bleeding, and help a lot with the cramps.”

“That will work,” he said smiling. He obviously didn’t like the scent.

Popping the cork Madeline gave it a sniff. It didn’t smell bad, and from what she understood potions had a very long shelf life. Just to be sure, she pushed a little of her own magic into it to get things going. Then she drank it. “That doesn’t actually taste that bad,” she said with surprise.

“Even better,” Victor chuckled. “How long will it take to work?”

“Not too long. This magic should work fast.”

“Good. Though a bath might be in order to help get rid of the blood on you.” He was so gentle when approaching this topic. It was strange, but endearing.

“That would be a good idea,” Madeline said with a chuckle. A nice hot, long bath sounded like a dream right now. “I think I’ll do that.”

“Thank you.” Nodding, Madeline made her way to the bathroom, but Victor called out shyly. “Would you be able to have a change of clothes, too? The smell of blood tends to cling to clothes.”

“Uh, yeah. I can do that.”

[Very emotional chapter, but I do hope you liked it.]