"The Rattler, Episode 3" Script Preview (Patreon)

[Lina and Bunny are riding into town on top of Lina’s horse, Betsy.]

Lina: “Here we are. Welcome to Dustburrow…most rotten shithole this side of the Sariloa.”

Lina: “Used to be this place was a minin’ town. ‘Til all the gold ran dry.”

Lina: “There ain’t no sheriff and there ain’t no laws here, Bunny.”

Lina: “So don’t go thinkin’ you can go cryin’ to somebody askin’ for help. Ain’t nobody in their right mind is gonna help ya escape me.”

Lina: “In fact, I’d prefer if you just keep yer mouth shut for the time bein’.”

Lina: “Don’t let anybody know our business, and especially don’ let anybody know that you’re a you-know-what.”

Lina: “Good.” 

Lina: “Now that that’s settled…let’s head on over to the local saloon. Should be servin’ free lunch ‘round this time.”

[Scene transition, Besty is placed by a post outside the saloon]

Lina: “I’m leavin’ Betsy here for the time bein’”

Lina: “Hm? Nah, there’s no use tyin’ her down. She’d just break free. Wouldn’t you, Betsy~?”

Lina: “No, I keep her off the leash most of the time. She’s smart enough to not go wanderin’”

[Doors swing open]

Lina: “Just act natural, Bunny. Pretend like you belong here.”

Lina: “Howdy, Boe. Long time no see.”

Boe: “Lina Black as I live and breathe.”

Lina: “Ahh~ You actually remember me this time.”

Boe: “Hard to forget after the shit storm you left behind last time you showed up to this sorry establishment.”

Lina: “Hehe~ Hey now, I can hardly be blamed for a little bit-a rough housin’. ‘Specially when the competition is so tasty.”

Boe: “Hehe~ So, what brings you here? Whiskey or lodgings for the night?”

Lina: “Both, thank ya kindly.”

Lina: A bottle of Saldovian whiskey for me…and get the bunny anything they want too.”

Boe: “Alrighty. What’ll it be, stranger?”

Boe: “We’ve got whiskey and beer, tequila if yer lookin’ for somethin’ that’s worth a couple extra bucks, and the cheap stuff: tarantula juice, coffin varnish, fire water…”

Lina: “Pfft…you really never drank before, Bunny?”

Lina: “Hehe, well definitely don’t get any of those last three cuz I think it may just knock you dead.”

Lina: “Tell ya what…Boe, ya got any of that sarsasprilla stuff?”

Boe: “Ah, forgive me, I forgot to mention we also got that.”

Lina: “Get ‘em a tall glass of that please. Oh and uh…the free lunch. You don’t happen to have any stuff for herbivores, do ya?”

Boe: “Well it is mostly just meat, but I tell you what, Sally makes a mean butternut squash soup.”

Lina: “Perfect.”

Lina: “Go on, Bunny. You must be famished. I’ll handle gettin’ us a room.”

[Ambience of bowl being served]

Daisy: “Howdy!”

Daisy: “Oh, sorry! Didn’t mean to startle ya.”

Daisy: “Goodness, you’re a jumpy little thang. What’s got you so spooked, darlin’?”

Daisy: “Ohh…first time in Dustburrow?”

Daisy: “Yeah I bet it’s a little more rough and tumble than yer used to, but it ain’t so bad! For every crooked no-good bandit ‘round these parts, we also got decent folk just tryna make a livin’”

Daisy: “My name’s Daisy by the way. Just wanted to say hi! You know, cuz…”

[She takes off her hat]

Daisy: “Ta-da! Mouse ears.”

Daisy: “Yep, I’m a mouse folk, you’re a rabbit folk. Just two herbivores enjoying a nice soup together. Ain’t that somethin’?”

Daisy: “Hehe~ Yeah, lunch here is all meat, meat, meat. It’s nice to see someone else enjoyin’ the fine veggies for once.”

Daisy: “Carrots, huh? I probably coulda guessed that. It’d probably be my favorite too if I was a bunny chimera.”

Daisy: “Oh, my drink? Hop and barley brewed beer. I’m in a drinkin’ mood today.”

Daisy: Gulping sounds

Daisy: “Pah~” (Exhale)

Daisy: “Keeps the tank nice and full~” (Dreamily)

Daisy: “Say, you’re not a friend of Valentina, are ya?”

Daisy: “Oh…welllll, she’s also a rabbit folk, one of them saloon girls. Uh, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to imply that all rabbit folk know each other! I just thought…ya know, uh, she’s a prominent figure ‘round these parts and maybe you were related?” (Anxious, rambling, awkward)

Daisy: “Hehe…sorry, that was a silly thing to assume, wasn’t it?”

Daisy: “I’m just a bundle of nerves today. It’s probably to do with that lamia that slithered in.” (Says ‘lamia’ with some stink)

Daisy: “Oh! Oh no…she’s coming right this way. I-I gotta skidaddle.”

[Sound of chair scooting]

Lina: “There you are, Bunny.”

Lina: “Who was that?”

Lina: “Didn’t I tell you to not talk with anyone?” (Mildly disapproving tone)

Lina: Sip Gulp

Lina: After drink exhale “Lay low from now on, alright?”

Val: “Well well well, look what the harpy dragged in!”

Lina: “Val?” (Looking around)

Lina: “Val! Darlin’ it’s been so long~” (Cheery)

Val: “It has been too long, hunny! You been avoidin’ me?”

Lina: “With a body like that, how could I? Hehe~” (Flirty)

Val: “Aw, stop it~ You’re the one who’s lookin’ all filled out. Been eatin’ good, aye, Lina?”

Lina: “Heh…there were uh…couple a snacks on the road over here.” (Slightly flustered)

Val: “Whoever they were, they look good on you~”

Val: “I may just give ya a discount~”

Lina: “Pssh~ It’s all about money with you, ain’t it?”

Val: “Hey, a girl’s gotta eat.”

Lina: “Heh. I’ll drink to that~”

Lina: “But a night with me may be your last~”

Val: “Then, do it you gluttonous bitch~”

Lina: “Hoho~ You are reeeeally playin’ with fire~”

Val: “Hehe~”

Val: [Single kiss]

Lina: [Single kiss]

Lina: “Whore.” (whisper, good spirited aggressive insult)

Val: “Snake.” (whisper, good spirited aggressive insult)

Lina: “Hehe~”

Lina: clearing her throat “As tempting as it is, we won’t be stayin’ long, so…”

Val: “Oh! Where are my manners? Your companion here is…ah! Nice to see another rabbit chimera ‘round these parts! How ya doin’ darlin’? The name’s Valentina, at your service!”

[Pause for Bunny to reply, they introduce themselves]

Val: “Ahaha~ You are adorable! I can see why Lina likes you. She does have a type after all.”

Lina: “I-it’s not like that. Bunny and I have business across the country. After that, we’ll part ways.”

Val: “Well the least you could do is call ‘em by their name.”

Lina: “I’ll call ‘em by their name when they earn my respect.”

Val: “Hehe. Oh don’t mind her, she’s just about the biggest grouch in the west. Wasn’t always like this though.”

Val: “Rumors say she even used to dance.”

Lina: “I don’t dance.”

Val: “...and do this funny little thing called singin’.”

Lina: Sigh “That was then, this is now.”

Val: “You ain’t been the same since-”

[Lina slams her hand down on the table]

Lina: “Enough!”

Lina: aggressive sigh “I need another drink…”

Val: “Oh! I’ll join you! Bunny can join in too.”

Lina: “You don’t need to do that. Like I said, we ain’t stayin’ long.”

Val: “All the more reason to enjoy our time together! All I’m askin’ for is one night. Do it for your old friend Valentina.”

Lina: “Tch…fine. Just don’t drop your guard. This ain’t a fuckin’ shindig.”

Val: Ain’t nobody gonna lay a finger on you or Bunny. This is my home turf. Safest place in Dustburrow for the weary traveler~”

Lina: Gulping sound, chugging drink

Lina: [Burp]

Lina: “Then let the drinks flow.”

[Time skip]

Lina: “Bunnyyyy…” (Drunk)

Lina: “Bunnyy…” 

Lina: “Bunny!” (More insistent now)

Lina: “Where the fuck…?”

Lina: “Oh, there ya are~!” 

Lina: [Burp]

Lina: “Ya keep disappearin’ on me.”

Lina: “I can’t letchyou outta my sight now can I?”

Lina: “Whatdya mean you been here the whole time?”

Lina: “Ehehe…well you are pretty teeny tiny. An’ I’m so big. Hehe…is hard to see ya.”

Lina: “I gotta keep an’ extra eye on you, or you’ll get snatched up by some other hungry lamia, lookin’ all toothsome~”

Lina: [Burp] “Mmmm…” Licks lips

[Screams can be heard from inside Lina’s tail.]

Lina: “Oh, this? I can barely feel ‘em squirmin’...they uh…lost a bet. I’m a little too good at poker~”

Lina: [Burp]

Lina: “Made winnin’ extra tasty. Can’t remember much else though…”

Lina: “Drunk? Me? Nah…nah…well, not drunk enough I reckon~ hehe~”

Lina: “This is nothin’. You shoulda seen me when I was ridin’ with the Black Mambas. Now that was a good time~”

Lina: [Burp]

Lina: “I could go another round.”

Lina: [Burp]

Lina: “Maybe you could conjure up some more dinner for me, ay Summoner? Hehe~ ¿Puedes darme más cerveza, por favor?”

Val: “Hehe~ You better be careful there. Once Lina’s drunk enough, she can’t tell friend from food!” (Also drunk)

Lina: “Not true~ That happened one time and they deserved it. This town’s better off without a sheriff anyway.”

Val: “That count may be off by a dozen, but it’s not like ya were ever good at math, honey. At least you’ve got the looks to make up for it~”

Lina: “Mmmm~” (Lustful growl)

Lina: “Val…darlin’...you been…[Burp] starin’ at my tits all night long. What say we cut the bullshit and…[Burp] go upstairs…let our bodies do the talkin’”

Val: “Oh Lina, I thought you’d neva ask~”

Lina: “Heh~”

Val: Giggling

[Laughing becomes distant and fades away]

[They both go upstairs, leaving Bunny behind]

[A few seconds pass]

Daisy: “Hey again!”

Daisy: Sigh “Yeah, I just left to take care a’some things. I’m actually preparin’ to head west tomorrow mornin’. Can’t stay cooped up in one spot for long, ya know? Gotta flow like a river.”

Daisy: “Oh my, no. I’m a travellin’ saleswoman. I thought ya mighta guessed.”

Daisy: “Say, where are you from anyway? Your accent is so peculiar.”

Daisy: “Ah…you don’t wanna say? Hm…”

Daisy: “Was that snake from earlier a friend of yers?”

Daisy: “Listen, you don’t gotta lie to me.” (Drops her timid persona)

Daisy: “Prey gotta stick together. Sooner or later, that snake is gonna eat you up and shit you out. Is that how you wanna end up?”

Daisy: “No, ‘course not.”

Daisy: “I know a kidnapped meal when I see one. Lucky for you, I’ve got an express ticket outta here come sunrise.”

Daisy: “Listen, that lamia is gonna be too hungover in the mornin’ to stop ya. You can meet me just outside the saloon in the mornin’ and we’ll be ridin’ across the salt flats by noon.”

Daisy: “Doesn’t that sound nice?”

Daisy: “Hey, I understand if yer a little hesitant. Think on it a little. You got plenty of time to consider my offer.”

Daisy: “You’re welcome. I love the chance to help a fellow chimera in need!”

Daisy: “Well…I should be gettin’ some shut-eye.”

Daisy: “G’night~!”

[Bunny goes upstairs]

Lina: Moan

Val: Moans of pleasure

Val: “Oh…Lina! Fuck! Ohh~”

Val: Short scream

Lina: Gulping sounds

Lina: “Mmmm! Ahh~” (Satisfied with her meal)

Lina: Longer moan (Settling down)

Lina: [Burp]

[Bunny opens the door]

Lina: “Ngh? Bunny?” (More drunk than ever)

Lina: “Close it. Lock that pesky door.”

Lina: “Mmm…come here. Get in my coils…”

[Sound of coils wrapping around Bunny]

Lina: “Mine~”

Lina: [Burp]

Val: “Lina! Lina!? T-this ain’t funny, Lina! Let me out!”

Lina: Inhale, exhale

Lina: “Mmm~ My little snuggle bun…”

Lina: [Burp]

Lina: “So full…”

Lina: “Mmm…where’d Val go anyway?”

Lina: “We were gonna…hic...mmm…”

Lina: Inhale, exhale

Val: “I’m in your stomach! Linaaaa!”

Lina: “Shhh~ Don’t speak, Bunny.”

Lina: “It’s much too late fer any a that.”

Lina: Yawn

Lina: “I’ll never let you go…not ever again…”

Lina: [Burp]

—-----------------------

[In limbo]

Val: sigh “What a way to go.”

Val: “Hehehe~” (Oddly cheerful)

Val: “Oh believe me, I am upset about bein’ dead. But I can’t bring myself to be mad at Lina. That’s just what love is.”

Val: “I got to go out with a bang. That’s all I could ever ask for~”

—--------------------------------

[Morning]

Lina: Snoring

[Bunny slips out of her coils]

Lina: “Ngh…? Sage?” (Groggy)

Lina: “Oh…it’s just you, Bunny.”

Lina: “Uggh…my head…it’s too early for this. Go back to bed…and get me some water…fuck.”

[Bunny leaves the room, closing the door]

Lina: “Bunny?” (Confused)

[Bunny goes downstairs and outside]

Daisy: “Hey! You made it!”

Daisy: “The wagon’s all packed up and ready to go.”

Daisy: “The snake, is she…?”

Daisy: “Heh…well shit…this’ll be an easy escape, ay?”

Daisy: “Y’know…I was real happy when I overheard you was a summoner.”

Daisy: “I knew right then that you’d sell for a mighty fine price!”

Daisy: “Boys!” 

[She snaps her fingers]

Daisy: “Grab ‘em.”

Daisy: “Hehehe~”

[Bunny is knocked unconscious]